Istanbul or Constantinople, as it used to be known, was our port of call today.

I woke at 7:30 am and after running three miles on the treadmill and doing my daily 100 sit ups, I decided it was time for my normal breakfast of 1/2 a grapefruit and some bran flakes.

OK, so I entered the realm of fantasy there for a moment. Let’s start again.

I woke at 7:30am and after walking to the computer to check my e mails, I ran a bath and contemplated whether or not to have sausage with my eggs and bacon.

By 8:45 am I was on the bridge. There are some special moments in the cruising world and many of them are made when a ship enters port for the first time. Until today, my top three were:

1. Venice – there is nothing like it in the world as ancient beauty meets modern fantasia
2. New York – on the Carnival Destiny in 1996, sailing past the Twin Towers. No other words are needed to describe why!
3. Amsterdam – my wife’s home and memories of a personal nature

And now there is another to add to my list:

Istanbul — Picture the scene. 50-plus small boats following us down the Bospherous which made for a navigating headache for the Captain. Turning to port, we sailed past the mosques and palaces just as the call to prayer sounded by the Imams. This is something you all have to experience for yourself as I just am not talented enough to explain the exhilaration this gives your senses.

We arrived about 15 minutes behind schedule, again due to the busy traffic, and then began the challenging task of debarking 2,000 guests on organized tours. The team of shore excursion staff and the cruise staff do a wonderful job with this and I truly am blessed to work alongside each and every one of them.

Within 1 hour and 15 minutes 2,000 plus guests were ashore…….fantastic.

I spent the next hour doing paper work. Why do we call it paper work these days as it is all computer based?! Anyway, I did that what I dislike most about my job and then Heidi and I set off with our fabulous tour operator Karen. Karen is the managing director of Seasong which runs our tours in both Turkish ports. The tours they offer are simply the best and her guides are truly the most educated and passionate I have met.

Now, you might think this next bit is false propaganda but I promise and assure you that it is not. At the time of writing ( 11:02 pm ) we have had just a single complaint about a tour today – and that’s out of 2,000 people!

I can hear thousands of you saying, “What was the complaint?” Well, it was a valid comment about a guest who felt very claustrophobic in the Grand Bazaar. I will have to make sure I mention this during my next port talk as the bazaar can get very crowded but is still part of my must see list. Thank you Karen and thank your guides for allowing our guests to experience the best of Turkish hospitality and to share with them your beautiful and exciting city.

We had a lunch of Turkish Kebab – mmmmmmmmmmmmmm – and then it was back on board.

Being a cruise director, you never know what is waiting for you. I returned to find a message telling me that the entertainer who was due to fly to the ship to entertain that night would not be arriving. He, like thousands of others, was stranded in New York due to the bad weather which was affecting much of the Eastern Seaboard. I then made plans with my staff to change the program for the evening around.

So, another day is over. I want to again apologize that time does not allow me to answer all the individual questions you may post but rest assured I will meet with each and every one of you when you cruise.

Please, though, keep posting your comments. I read each and every one of them and hope more people continue to post their remarks. As of tonight we are a group of 41,000 and I am hoping for 50,000 readers. If I reach this goal our President, Mr Bob Dickinson, has promised to buy me a brand new Moped

Oh, I misunderstood. Apparently, he has promised to buy me a brand new Mop Head

On that bombshell, I will say goodnight to you all in blog land, and see you all in the morning.

First, I want to apologize for not being able to post a blog over the weekend as I have to do them via the office in Miami. Anyway, here I am writing to you at 12:32am.

I have just enjoyed the incredible music of Penny Matheson, our guest entertainer. Penny is a beautiful songstress who charmed our audiences with her spectacular renditions from The Sound of Music, Phantom of the Opera as well as some opera classics. It marked a pleasant end to an otherwise very mixed day, hence the title.

Let’s start with the bad

We have had some teething problems with our public address system and this morning after most of the guests had left the vessel in Izmir, Turkey, I had to do an hour of testing the system. I was very conscious that I would be disturbing the remaining guests onboard but it had to be done. Thank goodness we ironed out the problems and all is now well. This got my day off to a bit of a grumpy start, however.

Things did not improve when at around 1:00 pm I received a phone call to tell me that I had a guest wanting to speak to me at the Information Desk. I went to meet him and was immediately met by a torrent of anger and waving of fingers.

The guest (who will remain nameless) was so very upset and getting so irate that I actually was concerned he would do himself harm. Anyway, I asked him into my office where I discovered what was wrong. It turns out that he felt it was very wrong of me to promote tours that featured visits to mosques in Turkey (The Blue Mosque etc). He felt that for various reasons I will not mention, it was wrong, and by doing so, I was promoting terrorism.

I have been doing this job for twenty years in June and I have heard and seen a lot of things but I was not prepared for this.

I explained that The Blue Mosque is visited by hundreds of thousands of visitors each year from all over the world and, in fact, tomorrow we would have over 2,000 guests from the ship on tours visiting this and other Islamic treasures. He would not hear my reasoning and, as I tried to explain further, he left by calling me “the Sperm of the Devil.” I sat there stunned and somewhat angry myself. I then got even more angry as I started to second guess myself. Had I done a bad thing by suggesting guests visit these places? Then I realized that I was an idiot just for thinking that. I hope you all agree.

I will try and talk to this gentlemen again tomorrow if for no other reason than to see what new name he has for me.

Now the good

Being a cruise director is a funny thing. Just when you think that it’s just not worth it and that nobody appreciates you, along comes something that makes this the best job in the world. Here is a letter from a disabled guest with obvious challenges in life but she has taken the time to write to me and, without her knowing it, rejuvenated me.

Here is her letter.

You can also view our guest’s letter.

Now the ugly – photos of me on stage
(Click on the image to view it in a larger format)

A special hello to Ayr’s mum (she is one of our backstage managers) – Mum, your daughter is a wonderful employee and you should be very proud of her.

So, it was a mixed bag of a day but at the end of it I find myself writing to my new blogging friends and thank you all once again for your valuable time.

Goodnight from me ………John Heald………………………The Sperm of the Devil