Morning all……It is 7:10am and we are just arriving in Livorno, Italy. I would like to say the weather looks nice, but it actually looks very grey and damp. Livorno is the gateway port to discover such beautiful and stunning places as Tuscany, Florence and of course Pisa. Note the spelling I used here as I have noticed many ” tourists ” spell it the same as Pizza.
This leads me quickly to a story from 1997 onboard the Carnival Destiny. Just before I start this story, there are some stories told by Cruise Directors (myself included) that sometimes are a little – far from the truth lets say. However, this one is absolutely true – you just cannot make something like this up.
A lady guest went to the Information Desk very upset that the cruise was not going to the destinations that her travel agent had promised her. When the Purser (a great girl called Cassandra) asked which port she was referring to, the guest replied angrily ”The Grand Canyon“. Cassandra looked at her and started to laugh thinking she was joking with her but when she saw the look on the guests face she realized she was serious. So, to cut a long story short it turned out after investigation that the passenger had thought that we were going to the Grand Canyon as promised by her agent. In fact of course we were going to Grand Cayman. She still was angry and promised that her agent would hear of her dissatisfaction when she returned home.
Anyway, back to the present and today 1600 people are leaving on ship tours to explore his beautiful region. Which to choose is hard and while I love Tuscany I do think that the tour to take is the Florence and Pisa combination. Pisa is a (get ready to groan) a slice of history (told you) that you must not miss. The tower really does lean at an acute angle and Miracle Square where it and the Basilica are set is a stunning place to explore. After lunch it is off to Florence to explore this beautiful town with all is glories.
It is now 10:00am and we are about to hold our life boat drill for crew only. A lot of guests think that we do this just at the beginning of every cruise but that is far from the truth. Safety is the number one concern onboard and before anything else all the crew must know what to do in a real emergency in order to save themselves and of course 3000 guests. So, each and every day there are drills and training that are undertaken all under the watchful eye of our Safety Officer who is responsible for all of these events.
So, time for boat drill, back soon.
It is now 12:45am. I just finished boat drill and then another Plaque Ceremony with officials from Livorno as this was the Freedom’s first call here. My wife is ashore getting essential items such as toothpaste, razor blades and hemorrhoid cream (we are friends now so we can talk about everything).
I am going to finish this blog by answering the questions that were posted by a blog reader called “Secret Agent” – some of you have great names, Stingray,Alannonce, Robocop etc, so I am going to change my blog name to spermofthedevil.hell.:)
Anyway here are the answers you requested, though goodness knows why.
Favorite Film
Tough one this and I had to go with two tied for first place.
The Godfather ( the original of course although 2 was intense and brilliantly acted nothing can beat Brando’s amazing portrayal )
The Hunt for Red October ( There is something about this movie that makes me want to see it over and over again )
Favorite Book
I read everyday. As tired as I am I cannot sleep without reading a few pages. I prefer biographies to fiction however I love the novels by Andy Macnab who is an ex British Special Forces soldier who writes about what he actually did on a fictional basis.
However my favorite book is also by him called Bravo Two Zero about how he was captured in the 1st Iraqi war………..one man’s personal nightmare captured in a book that will haunt you for weeks after you have finished it.
Who Makes Me Laugh
Well, that’s a tough one. The best laugh comes from you, yes you. Cruise ship guests are a wonderful source of entertainment ( as seen in the story I just mentioned ). However, from the world of entertainment there are two men who really do make me laugh very hard.
John Cleese – He is the master. Please, go rent Fawlty Towere today and see what I mean.
Ricky Gervais – He is the writer and star of “The Office” that I know is now so popular in the states.
Hardest thing about being a Cruise Director
Well, I guess you mean about the job itself and it is not easy to answer. I can not speak for other Cruise Directors for me it is not letting that one person get to you. In entertainment you are always going to have people who do not like what you say and do. My biggest trouble is not taking that personally however most of the time I do not succeed and do end up getting down on myself……………that’s show business I guess.
Of course there are other difficult areas just like any job but overall I am so lucky that Carnival gave a chance to the worst bar waiter in the history of Piña Coladas to become a Cruise Director……I am eternally grateful to them.
I apologize that this blog had no real subject, but some days are like this here onboard and I wanted to ” keep it real ” – wow, I have started using street slang now
So, its goodnight blogger from me and ” stay cool my dog ” !
Look, friends — there are a few things you should remember before you comment. The space below is for you to post your comments about the post I've just written above. If it is something that's unrelated, please use the Ask John tab above. Now, while I may not be able to reply to your comment below, I do sit in my underpants almost every morning and read everything that is here. So feel free to comment on the comments and then if someone wants to comment on the comment to the comment then go ahead as well. Please be courteous unless the poster is French...........then you can say whatever you want.
Dear John, “BIG ED” is doing better. We just received your Thursday, Friday and Sunday blogs all at one time.So he has been moved from the rubber room to a normal room.
Pat
Well… now you must answer these three questions:
What is your name?
What is your quest?
What is your favorite color?
And perhaps… What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
I
Favorite Things!
Good taste, John! Love “Red October” and John Cleese but you forgot “The Sting” ! One of my favorites….with “my” favorite actor….Lee Paul!
Oh yeah, I’m married to him ! It’s still a great Academy Award winning film with wonderful Robert Shaw! Lee was one of Shaw’s “henchmen” along with Charlie Dierkop.
I’ll never forget sitting in Harry’s Supper Club for an early dinner at a window seat. I wondered what the strange cloud formation was just off the bow. I had my husband get up and go out on deck. It was Stromboli ! Wow! As we got closer you could hear the eruptions going off in the distance. I’m glad we are passing the volcano once again on this trip!
Kathy and Paul ( Lee Paul )
Dear John,
We love your blog! It’s as if we are also on the Freedom. My inlaws (my husband’s parents) have embarked today, and we’ll thus be travelling with all of you!
Greetings,
Thais&Fabian
ps1. we were on the Glory in the Caribbean (Nov/Dec 2004) and never forgot Willy Banger!
ps2. we would like to send a bday message, is there a fax onboard?
Dear Mr. Spermofthedevil:
Please don’t stop blogging. Those of us living vicariously through you would be very very sad.
Just your normal day stories are so very funny and entertaining, you should write a book, you’d make a fortune with your over 60,000 fans out here.
Hope to meet you on the cruise April 6th….
John (aka Sperm of the Devil),
Just wanted to let you know how much I am enjoying your blog. (I just read the whole thing… Yes, from the beginning!)
You are probably the only cruise director from a cruise line I’ve never been on that I’ve actually heard of – a real legend in the cruise industry. I do hope to meet you someday so I can enjoy the sense of humor that is so evident in your blog posts!
I agree with all those who say not to stop blogging, at least not while you are still on the ship. After all, shipboard life is never dull so the blog should never be either! (I might not want to hear about your life at home… Or maybe I would! You can judge that for yourself
…)
Now, the real reason I’m here… I’m a freelance cruise writer and I’m writing an article about blogs posted by crew members for a big cruise web site. I’ll let you know when the article is published… In the meantime, keep on blogging!
Best,
Doug
spermofthedevil.hell
ha ha ha ha ha…..
s’dreams
The Hunt For Red October? Yes – how can one not love a movie with a Russian Submarine Commander who speaks with a Scottish burr.
Bob & Gay
IMPORTANT AND URGENT!
HELLO JOHN!!!
I am Barbara from Croatia! Ever since You started writing this blogg I have been reading because it is very interesting to see what is happening onboard. My best friend is a member of your crew so I like to know where she is at the moment because she cannot always replay to my e-mails. Her name is Barbara Sinožić and she is a supper club hostess. I have been on Freedom in Venice on March 3rd to visit her and see that magnificent ship. And I was astonished by it¨s beauty but also by the hospitality. It was such a perfect day! And I have to mention that we had met in restaurant by the Chinese food and talked about Croatian national food called “CEVAPCICI” which I undestand You really like!
I actually decided to write You because I want to ask You a favour! My friend Barbara whom I mentioned earlier (supper club hostess) is having a birthday tomorrow,on March 28th! I don”t know if I would be able to contact her tomorrow so I would like if you could pass her my greeting card! I just want if you could say as notification on the air or send her a note or a card or something where it would say that I wish her all the best and love her very much! I want her to know that I think of her every day and hope to come on Freedom again te see her!
Hope I am not demanding too much but I hope You can help me!
Even if You cannot help me I look forward reading more interesting stories about Your journey on Freedom!
Barbara
John, What was the Mountain straight in front of the ship today that we could see on the front “webcam 1″.
“BIG” Ed
Hi Big Ed !
That’s Vesuvius. I took that same shot on August 24th last year from the Liberty. They’re in the Bay of Naples. I remember the date because that’s the anniversary of Vesuvius erupting. We visited Pompeii on that day. Very cool !! Wait til you see Stromboli !!!
46days and counting til our flight !
Kathy and Paul
Hello John,
My wife and I have been waiting with great anticipation for comments on the good ship Carnival Freedom. We booked passage last year before the ship was completed and are very interested in every aspect of the newly launched ship.
I can see from the comments posted by yourself and other travellers that we will greatly enjoy the ship and all it has to offer.
This is our third cruise but the first to Europe. On that note, I have a small story to tell of total co-incidence and just freaky dumb luck which has cemented into our minds that this trip is going to be very special for us.
The story goes:
As young couples we meet on the 19th,
We became engaged on the 19th and
Got married on the 19th
Our first house settled on the 19th
We later bought an investment property off the plan. (Only a hand full were left by the time we got to take our pick.) Guess what? Number 19 was available. Ahhh!!!! How freaky is that?
But wait! There’s more!
My Birthday is the 28th
My Wife’s Birthday is the 28th
We bought our existing house on my Birthday, the 28th and rented it for three years.
When we finally moved in, it was my Birthday, the 28th.
(Sorry. Almost at the end)
We booked this cruise and the original date was going to be in May with our return date back home, (Perth WA) being the 28th. We are meeting up with friends in Europe and they were going to join us on the May Cruise.
As fate would have it they need to be back home by the 26th of May for family commitments. I then called our Travel agent and asked if there was an earlier passage we could swap to.
Of all the dates to come back with! The 19th of April. (Which just happens to be our 27th wedding anniversary!)
So from Tom and Noeleen.
We can’t wait to meet you and have the greatest of times on the Carnival Freedom.
PS. Our Friends Rob and Jean have also moved o the 19th so we can help them celebrate their 25th Anniversary.
How about a toga party one night at dinner? We did this on one of our first cruises with Carnival; a whole group went from Atlanta with a radio station and boy did we party! That is what got us hooked on cruising Carnival.