I smell………….I have been flying for 8 hours…..I just got home and boy do I need a shower……all I need to do is to act rude and coupled with the stench emanating from my body I could walk around the streets of Paris and blend in with no
problem at all.

Good Evening. It’s 6 pm here in the U.K. and Heidi and I are home safe after a long trip. You know, every time I think to myself, I will have nothing to write about, things happen and once again our journey home was eventful to say the least.

The Passenger Service Director, Martin, had organized a van for us to take us to Barbados International Airport and after the cases were loaded in and poor Troy, our driver, strained his back from the super human effort needed to do so, we began what we thought was our journey to the airport ………………….wrong.

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I shall miss the Piazza; it’s become my favorite place to blog. The waitress knows to bring me an espresso and a bottle of water without me having to ask and even though I cannot have one, the sight and smell of the doughnuts, pastries and toffee apples make for a great atmosphere to write in.

As I mentioned a few days ago the Piazza is a great place to people watch and now as I sit here at 9 am there is lots to see. Guests are asking where the gangway is and right now a couple is arguing just a few feet away from me on where to go.

The man is now having a finger waived in his face by his wife and they both seem oblivious to the fact that they are the center of attraction …………………. ok……………the wife has walked away and reluctantly Mr. Lost is following on behind still shouting at his wife……………..brilliant entertainment.
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She has put up with the packing, unpacking, and packing again. She has put up with me blogging when I should have been romancing. She has put up with my underwear on the floor, the toilet seat being in the wrong position and nursed me when Monsieur Bell came to stay………….so I decided that today Heidi deserved a bit of pampering and relaxation.

Good Morning everyone from the Emerald Princess who as I speak is docking in the port of St.Kitts. It is 8 am and Heidi is asleep still. I however was woken up by an alarm of a different sort as last night’s dinner decided to magically turn into a gaseous form……………… who needs an alarm clock when you had spicy prawns for dinner?

We ate in the regular dining room last night at anytime dining and again experienced no lines and the service and food continued to be first class. Heidi had a salad and fish while I also opted for lighter fare considering the hippopotamus I ate last night at the Crown Grille.

During dinner we were approached by Mr. and Mrs. Ziegler who recognized me from a recent Carnival Freedom cruise. This was their first Princess cruise and like me they were having a brilliant time. Mr. Ziegler asked me for some advice which I was happy to give him. We invited them to sit with us and listened to his story.
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The alarm on my raspberry went off this morning at 6:45 am…………………….bugger.

The Emerald Princess arrived in St. Thomas today and because we previously went to the Bahamas and were now in U.S. territory all 3,400 of us have to line up and show our passports………..more about that in a moment.

Getting out of bed was not easy this morning due to the fact that once again I had eaten too much last night which I will chat about later in this thingy.

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It’s 8 am and I hereby make a promise to you all………….I am never eating anything ever again…………..nothing………….not even air. The reason for this extraordinary statement is that last night I had the most amazing meal and ate the equivalent weight of a baby Yak…………………..nope, I will never eat anything ever again.

John blogging in the Piazza again!
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It was while I was standing in line for breakfast this morning at the Horizon Grill that I met Mr. and Mrs. Alan and Ann Reed………..hanging round their neck on a lanyard where their ship cards which were very shiny and very platinum.

I see you are Princess cruise land fans I said to Mrs………. and those simple words had us sharing breakfast together as I listened to the talk of their fondness for all things Princess. This cruise marks number 31 for them and they are booked on two more this cruise including the inaugural of the Ruby Princess.

I explained to them who I was and why I was being so inquisitive but they were only too happy to talk to me. They first cruised back in 1985 and were immediately hooked and later this year they will sail on the Caribbean Princess to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary with their entire family.

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Sitting in the Princess Theatre and watching someone else perform is a very strange feeling. I watched James Lay the Emerald Princess’s Cruise Director host the welcome aboard show this evening and it just did not feel right. It will be a bit like the feeling Bill Clinton would get if Hilary was President…………..just in the same way that I felt I should have been on stage and not in the audience Bill will be thinking that should be me under the desk in the Oval Office ………..sorry…………I meant behind the desk in the Oval office.

Still, at least I got to see a professional work and he had them eating out of his hand……………I mean James the CD not Bill Clinton…………………..more about the show in a minute.

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One of the things Heidi and I had talked about on the journey from Miami to Fort Lauderdale was the question of how long it would take before someone recognized me.

Heidi said within the first hour and I said not until the first sea day ………….. well……………. it took ………………35 minutes…………………….once again Heidi was right and I was wrong………..what a shocker………………..more about that later.

It’s a funny old world……………..one minute you are standing on stage with a patch over your eye on the Carnival Freedom……………..then you are in meetings in the office in Miami…………and now here I am sitting in cabin A734 (the A stands for Aloha) with the balcony doors open writing to all my friends.

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I know many of you love scrapbooking so I wanted to show you scrapbooking like you have never seen before.

Have a look at this:

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I have been told by my wife and super spy PA 007 that I am a cruel man. Both have said that I must stop teasing you about my meeting last Saturday.

Oh, OK then. Last week I received an email from someone via someone else via someone else’s friend who had sent an email via a person through a carrier pigeon…………..it doesn’t matter, I received an email. This email told me that someone who has a very respected name in the film and TV industry thought the blog may………….and I say may…………have the potential to be a TV situation comedy.

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