One of the things I was so looking forward to about coming back to the Caribbean was spending some time ashore in Ocho Rios which as I have said before is one of my favorite ports. Last time we were here I had a cold and couldn’t face the hot sun…….today, once again I look out of my window and see the beautiful greenery, golden beaches and the crispy pieces of Jerk Pork barbecuing at the beach side restaurant ……………. and here I am once again, stuck on board. I guess there really is nothing stopping me going ashore, its just that with the thing I have that I promised I won’t mention in yesterday’s blog……..well…….I am not really in the mood.
Last night I performed the guest talent show and bedtime story…………it went well……….I got through it…………the audience seemed to have a great time ……….but once again I new in my heart of hearts that I was not firing on all cylinders and therefore not anywhere near my best …………..hold on…………….stop……………….listen to me whining on and on…………..right……….I need to get myself out of this labyrinth of personal doom and despair…………..I am going to slap myself in the face………..here goes……………bugger that hurt……………..did it work?………………….nope…………..
I need something scarier to snap me back to my senses………………oh, I know……………….let me look at myself naked in the mirror ……………… hold on………………..ok, I am back…………that didn’t work and now I need a new mirror………………hold on………………..ok……….I have an idea………standby.
Ok, I feel much happier now and there will now be no more misery and self pity on today’s blog…………….what snapped me back to my senses and made me realize how happy I am………………….this did.
I could have been him………………now that’s an affliction
Let’s have a bit of fun and with that in mind who better to provide that then one of your fellow guests…………this is from yesterday’s log.
Guest:_________ Owner: (JEAZ) Jessica Zanolari
Cabin: _____ Booking#: _________ Added-Changed: 03/05/08 – 03/05/088401 – Crab Bite
Mr __________came to the Shore Excursion Desk and then to the Purser’s Office to complain that he was bitten by a crab while swimming at Seven Mile Beach in Grand Cayman. Guest was not on a tour from the ship but went to the beach that was recommended by the Cruise Director in his travel talk. he was just standing in the water when he felt a sharp pain on his small toe on the left foot and saw a medium sized crab biting him. Guest was offered medical treatment but refused however was upset that he had not been warned that the beach may have crabs in the sea and passengers should have been warned ahead of time. Purser explained that we could not possibly know what is there but guest wants his comments documented and to talk to John the CD.
Tasked to CD and follow up.
John – please review other 7 comments from the report from guest regarding other situations.
There really has been an “animal ” theme running through this cruise. I am sitting here writing to you and thinking that surely, some of you must be thinking ………ok………..he has run out of things to say and this has to be made up…………..nope……..it’s real.
So, I called the guest and he was adamant that there should have been some kind of mention in my talk and in the written information that Crabs and other sea life………..well…………may live there. I apologized, again offered him medical assistance which he again declined and was about to offer him some warm butter and mayonnaise but stopped myself just in time.
The guest though then changed tactics and caught me by surprise. He is traveling alone and although he said he did not care for the other guests onboard and found the ship to loud he was very impressed with the crew and how friendly they were………..I immediately felt bad for even thinking of offering him some cocktail sauce for his crab bite.
Anyway, I apologized and said that I would use his story in this blog and during my talk to warn others that there…………ummmm…………..crabs in the sea. I did mention that this was a very unusual incident and he seemed pleased that I had called him.
So be warned, if you are paddling in the sea at Seven Mile Beach watch out for Colin the Crab………….he has a toe fetish.
I would like you to meet a special chap from the Talent Show last night. His name is Chief Raven Wolf. He is part of the Apalachee Tribe and last night he spoke proudly of his heritage and then played some beautiful music on his traditional flute style instrument………it was beautiful and the sort of music that leaves the hairs on the back of you neck snapping to attention. Anyway, it was a lovely moment and it was something everyone in the audience really appreciated as did I.
OK, going to go and have a walk around the ship and to Lido for lunch…………no Jerk Pork but a bowl of Mongolian Wok should be nice…………back soon.
It’s now 3:24pm and I am sitting here waiting for the Captain to switch on the engines and take us to Miami……….however…….we are waiting for three ladies………Pauline, Lou and Michelle………three friends …….all aged around 25 ……..and all about to get a great photo of the ship as we sail away. At this stage I have paged three times for them and asked if anyone who maybe traveling with them to let us know where they may be or if they have a phone with them so we can call.
Sometimes, when I page people they are actually onboard as our computer entry system is not infallible. However, in this as in most cases……the girls are simply not onboard and we have no idea where they are. The manifest tells me they are in the same cabin and are all from Maryland……….stand by.
Ok, they just walked on at 3:31pm………..they are three very lucky girls……….let me call them and see what happened and if they are OK.
Indeed they are ok and seem very happy having drunk a vat of something green at Margaritaville. Its such a difference here in the Caribbean then in Europe………….In Europe people miss or nearly miss the ship because they have been off exploring Pompeii or Capri or have become lost in the alleyways of Venice. They have missed the vessel because they took a taxi to see The Grand Mosques of Istanbul and are stuck in the nightmare that is Istanbul rush hour.
They have missed the vessel because they have been so impressed at the wonders of Pisa, Tuscany and Florence that they decided to join the ship the next day in Rome. They have been late back because seeing the old town of Dubrovnik and hearing the emotional tales of the troubles and hatred that nearly destroyed the most beautiful town in the country had them forgetting about time……………..here in the Caribbean…….people are late…………….because they were in the bar!
Congratulations to the Holland America Eurodam blog which has hit an incredible 250,000 readers. The ship is getting close to sailing now and I highly suggest you have a daily read of what is happening………it is really fascinating. The link thingy is at the side of the blog so click away.
Here are today’s Random Photo selection.
The purser’s
The dancers
A photographer
Fun in the dinning room
Service with a smile
Dinner time
Bread anyone?
Here are today’s Letters In Their Own Words
Let’s push on with the comments. Once again thank you to everyone for their kindness to Susan and Maria. I have no further updates on either yet but maybe Big Ed will be able to tell us more about Susan soon ……….. until then lets keep them in our thoughts.
Here we go.
LINDA POLANCIH…………………..I am very happy to hear that you had such a wonderful time with us last week. Please do not worry about me I will be fine and I also hope that the DVD’s you purchased of my shows will keep the memories alive until the next time you walk up the gangway to join us. I hope that day comes really soon. My best to you and the family.
LOIS NEWJOBSKI………….Thanks as always for the kind words of love and support. I hope your new job is going well and I am sure that with your personality and fun outlook on life you will soon be Lois Employeeofthemonthski. Miss you.
GREG B………….I think I will do the acupuncture mate. As you can see from one of the letters I just posted there have been other guests who have recommended I do it as well………..maybe tomorrow I will give it a go. I try indeed to keep my sense of humour alive……….its my best weapon of defense at the moment………..and Heidi of course. Thanks for all the kind words mate and those you reserved for your fellow bloggers. Cheers.
PEANUTS…………Yes, let’s have a bet on the next season of the NBA. It seems my heat showed some charity to the boys from Toronto on Wednesday but next season they will drink Canada dry! Thanks for the kind thoughts and its words like this that keep me going. Heidi and I send you our best.
LONGING 2 CRUISE………Going to give it a go………..thanks for the words of encouragement., you are very kind. Thank you also for those beautiful words for Maria.
DEMOS…………..I think you are the first to call me cute since I got the BP………..you just made my day. Thanks.
TOM AND JANE………..Cute……….and now sexy………….maybe this BP thing isn’t as bad as I thought!……………yes, it isHope you are both well and a big hello from us both here.
CHERI BOLCHOZ………..I am making investigations on your behalf on the coins and I will get back to you. I am sure I can help you out. Unfortunately, the lithographs given away in the dining rooms have stopped production. This may be more difficult. Getting a tattoo of the Carnival Funnel is indeed dedication of the highest order. I congratulate your husband on his taste. I think I will get one on my bottom, although I will not need the actual smoke coming out, that bit will be taken care of naturally. Thank you Cheri, I will get back to you soon.
KATHLEEN………Of course I remember you and your bucket list letter was very popular. I picture you now rocking away to Jimi Hendrix on guitar hero. I am sure one day we will be able to have a photo taken all together. Until then, I hope you read my blog every day and let me know the next time you achieve something else on your list. You are my hero.
NANNI………….Thank you for suggesting that I stop blogging for a bit and I can understand how much you care. Actually, I am finding it helpful to blog because no one reading it will actually hear my speech disability and I can be myself. Thank you for such kindness and I hope you and your family are all happy. You have two beautiful children and you should be very proud of them. Muchos Huggos.
CUISING EAGLE………..I am glad you saw the recommendations for the Carnival Elation. Please let me know if you have any other questions. I will ask the Cruise Director for his input on excursions in Ensenada. Like your son, all my drinks are also through a straw. It’s a strange feeling especially hot tea. I will be in touch soon. Best to you and your family.
MORT13ERS………….I am glad you enjoyed the photo of Eddie Capone and I am sure you have some unbelievable memories of Eddie as your Cruise Director in 1988. I am afraid the greenhouse gases can not be controlled……..poor Heidi. Cheers mate.
ANGELA IN VANCOUVER………….Thank you Angela, your kind words and get well message was very kind. Thank you so much. My best to you and your family.
SALLIE…………..Just wanted to say a quick Thank You for your motivating words to Maria. Being a breast cancer survivor yourself I am sure this filled her with hope. Thank you so very much.
CRUISING SAL………………Now, the thought of Jessica Simpson doing that, just gave me the biggest lopsided smile you have ever seen. Thank you Sal.
LINDA, MOM OF DJ……………..I like it when you are on your soapbox. It means you are thinking of me which no matter how many times I say that, I mean it. How is DJ? Is he looking forward to his next cruise? I hope to see him soon.
BIG MIKE…………………I do not think I have ever eaten at a place called Fuddruckers and saying that word with a lisp sounds very funny. I make a deal with you. You buy me a Fuddruckers’ burger and I take you to the U.K. for the best plate of Spotted Dick you have ever had for desert. Cheers mate.
GLORIA………………..No, it’s not pleasant and I think acupuncture may be the way to go. I am blessed that so many people want to help me, which in itself is great medicine.
TIM TOSCHACK………..First of all, Heidi is very excited to hear that you will be bringing her a sweatshirt from Canada, especially as it has the make of her favorite Canadian beer on it. Thank you very much. Size M please. We look forward to seeing you on the Transatlantic Cruise where we will be joining you in Funchal.
RICK AKA SEAN CONNERY LOOK A LIKE………..Before I forget, what is your favorite Connery movie? Very funny, you had acupuncture had a pint and looked like the Trevi fountain…. Anyway, I think I will give it a go and I have indeed told Roberto thank you for sending me the photos of you. Thanks for thinking of me mate.
DIANE CRUZIN 2………………….If there were 2 things you would ask Heidi what I am not good at. One would be delegation and the other has to do with me leaving my underwear on the floor. If things don’t improve then maybe I will have to delegate more but I am determined to fight on. Thanks for caring, hope you are well.
BIG ED…………….Thank you for the great news on Susan. I am sure she will have weeks of rehabilitation ahead of her so please let her know we will all be thinking of her. Congratulations on continuing the friendship that grew amongst your crew on board even after you all disembarked. It’s amazing. All the best mate.
MISSINGTHESMOKEFREEPARADISEBUTNOWWANTINGTOBECALLEDJUSTJON………………Heidi is indeed still kissing me, although for some reason she demands to wear eye patches before she does. Thanks for your thoughts mate and I know you know they mean the world to me. Best to your lovely wife.
LORIE CLEMENTS…………….I am sorry to hear you also had Bell’s Palsy. How long did it last? At this point I am not sure which ship I will be on in March 2009, I should know more later in the summer and of course we will let you know. It would be great seeing you again and please keep reading the blog thingy until then.
LUCINDA MILLER………….Goodness, your eyes must be tired after reading each and every blog but I am honoured that you did. I was so upset to read about the bad experience on the Carnival Glory. Did you let Carnival’s Guest Relations Dept. know? If not, please can you send a more detailed letter to me and Stephanie will send it on to me directly. This will not be posted and I will send it on the someone in Head Office. I will try and let you know as soon as I can where I will be next year; however, it is a little too early to tell who will be the Cruise Director on which ship. Thank you for your kind words and please let me know what happened on the Carnival Glory. My best to you and your husband.
SOUTHERN DREAMS…………Thank you for thinking of us both as we do of you always.
THE DALGLISH’S………………Goodness me, Heidi is going to have to get a bigger suitcase. How fantastic, she would love a hoody from the mighty state of Colorado. Hoodys are her new thing so thank you for your kindness in advance and we will see you in July on the Carnival Splendor. Thank you. By the way, that is a good Scottish name.
EVA……….It sounds like you had a busy week at work. I am glad you found the time to catch up on the blogs. I am doing my best to rest, however, reading that you are laughing is great medicine for me. Thank you so much also for your prayers for Maria and Susan and for always thinking of Heidi and I. All the best.
SHARON DOVER……………..Thank you also for thinking of Maria. As soon as I hear any news, I will let you all know.
JIMNI……………You are the second person to call my lopsided smile “sexy” ……….What have you all been drinking? Seriously, thank you for your kind words and your thoughts and prayers are so much appreciated.
MARK TWAIN AND A HALF……………….Great jokes! I especially like the “first day with the new hook” joke. Very funny. I needed that and I thank you and your other half for taking the time to share it with me.
NICO R………………….I tell you what, I make a deal with you. When your grandmother comes on the ship, I am sure we can arrange for her to be Godmother of a life raft or lifeboat. If it will make her day, then that is good enough for me.
Keep in touch.
SUSAN V………………It’s amazing how many people are suggesting acupuncture if the Prednisone does not work. Thank you also for thinking of Maria and Susan. That is very kind of you. Please send me your letter to Chris Jefferson via the blog thingy and Stephanie will forward it directly to me and then I will send it on to him. He is a great chap and I know you will have a wonderful time with him. Look forward to hearing from you soon, all the best.
M AND M………….Thank you for the Happy Anniversary wishes and may I say a belated Happy Birthday to MICHELLE. I see some of the names you mentioned who served and entertained you during your cruise are still here and my only disappointment was that I was not there to share it with you. I am glad you have been reading the blog and I hope the next time you sail it will be my fortune to say Welcome Aboard to you both.
JOHN AND SUSAN IN FRISCO……………I had a nice day of rest today and I am sure that has done me well. Please know that I appreciate all your kindness and concern and reading your words makes me feel so much better already. My best to you both. Maybe I need a week of vacation in San Francisco.
ED MILAN…………….Thank you Ed. Heidi is working so hard, both on work projects and looking after me. Thank you so much for thinking of me.
DRIVERNC…………..Just wanted to say Thank You to both of you. I am determined to get better quickly and reading that you are thinking of me helps a lot. Cheers to you both.
WIL-DA-BEAST…………….I am humbled by so many people’s warm wishes for me to get well, so, a big Thank You to you for your kind words. My best to you and all my friends from Texas.
MICKEY’S PAL………..Hello Myra and thanks to Big Ed for showing you how to post a photo. Big Ed will keep us posted on Susan’s condition and you are right it is an amazing recovery. Thank you for thinking of me Myra and hopefully I will be back to my normal self very soon. Heidi sends her kindest regards to you, as do I.
KUKI………………..Send me those requests mate. I will make sure they will be taken care of. Remember I leave here on the 22nd of March. Cunard sounds like fun, I wonder if it will actually ever happen. Say hello to everyone on Cruisemates and let me know how I can help.
WANMAN………….Thanks for the great laugh, especially the mention of Mark Price, my fellow Cruise Director, being so ugly. I am glad you had a wonderful time on your recent Carnival Conquest cruise and hopefully you will be able to have some fun with me on board soon. Cheers mate.
PHILIP NEAL……………It seems as though Heidi has started something and all of you I know are now buying hoodys for her……you really shouldn’t. Normally, Medium is her size, how wonderful to think of her. The address to send them to is the one next to the blog attn. Chris Prideaux. Thank you again and if there is anything I can do for you, please let me know.
CRUISING SUE…………I am glad you had such a fantastic time with Eddie Capone at the airport. He truly is one of a kind and I have passed your words on to him. Thank you for thinking of me and your words of kindness are also very much appreciated. Cheers.
CRAIG……..Typing with one eye is not easy but the blog is therapeutic in some strange way. Thanks mate, hope all is well with you.
FLIP-FL0P-CUISE QUEEN……………..Thank you and hearing that I made you laugh so much makes me feel better already. Last night at the show 1,000 people were laughing hysterically and even though I may not have performed as I normally can it gave me strength to keep going. Reading your words has added to that strength and thank you also for those beautiful words for Maria. Thank you Cheryl for being such a great friend.
AARON……………Finding things to laugh about is so important. You don’t stop laughing because you are ill, I know it’s not always easy but I have to keep trying to provide laughter and find things to laugh at myself. Thanks for your kind words and your get well message. Cheers mate.
EXPAT-KANUCK…………..Here is a first. A Canadian living in Moscow who is been reading the blog but never posted. I remember the cruise on the Carnival Liberty which you shared with Howie Mendell. I will be glad to let you know about the top 3 tours for Costa Rica, Panama and Cozumel. Stand by for those answers coming up in the next few days. How is the weather in Russia? I will be in St. Petersburg in early April. Thanks mate, take care.
MICHELLE…………I forwarded your request to Ken. Thank you for wishing me a speedy recovery, hope your wish comes true. My best to you and Tom.
POPCORN GAL…………..I always do what Dr. Heidi tells me. I never let “them” get me down but sometimes it is harder than others. Thanks for your continuous support and all the best.
CAROL SCHOENBERGER…………….Nothing new yet on the Carnival Dream’s itinerary. PA has their nose to the ground and will let me know as soon as possible. Thank you Carol for being such a great friend and especially this time for your kind words for Susan and Maria. All the best.
LINDA HERNACKI………….Thank you and the next time I see you, I shall hold you to that kiss. Whenever you post, it is always to thank other people and I want to thank you for thinking of others so much. Please say a big hello to Mike.
JERI GREEN……….I am going to give it a go mate. At this point I have nothing to lose. I shall keep going for now, blogging ever onward as I know it means so much to so many people. Thanks for being a great friend.
CAROLIN AND DON………………..I realize that a Queen Mary 2 bloggers get together cruise may be too expensive and not something everybody would want to do. Maybe we should think about another Carnival one instead. Don’t worry, I would never do anything that appeals to just a few rather than the many. Your continuing thoughts for my best recovery are wonderful to read and I thank you so much.
DEBORAH ROSATO…………….What can I say, accept thank you so much for being my friend.
TERESA C…………….I don’t know, there is always been something about George Hamilton. He is my role model, surrounded by beautiful women, sitting on luxurious yachts, eating Iranian caviar and drinking chilled shots of Vodka and all he does to attract these beauties is lay in the sun. …….lucky bugger. Thanks for the fun Teresa. Thanks for being a great friend.
ANDREA………….Falling in love on a cruise is always special. I should know, it has happened to me many times. I do hope you find a time when you can cruise with me and I will let you know how the Kung Pao chicken works. All the best and I remain at your service.
BIG ED…………..The thought of the lovely Pat having a hot flush and using my thingy to cool her down is the stuff you usually find on the top shelf of a magazine rack. I would gladly come over and wave my thingy around if it kept her cool. Please send her my love.
DMINX…………..Your first post arrived alive and well. How are you? Welcome to blog land.
LINDSEY B……….Your timing is perfect. While I have been answering everyone’s comments I have also been doing as you instructed and doing my facial exercises. Lindsey, I know you are going to think my memory is going, can we just put everything together in one posting of exactly what you would like in the dining room, the dates, names and cabin numbers etc. as this saves me going back into the hundreds of postings. I will help as best I can. All the best.
RIKKI BOYCE……….Looks like, it’s acupuncture for me mate. Thanks for the recommendation. I hope you are well.
SUE K……………….Thank you for saying I am still handsome and may I suggest an eye test for you? Thanks for being my friend though. Please write soon.
That’s all we have time for today. Thank you for all your comments. I am trying to answer every single one, not just the questions for as long as I can. If I have missed anyone’s out, please resend. Please keep them coming.
One follow up on the lovely German guests who bared all on the Lido yesterday. PA 007 wrote this to me:
John, I did some investigation following what I read on yesterday’s blog and apparently that Nude sunbathing is allowed in a special enclosed area on AIDA ships……….another reason why AIDA is one of the fastest growing most successful part of Carnival Corporation. I am a naturalist myself so I think an AIDA cruise may be for me.
I would like to say hello to all the readers and I may have some more breaking news for you very soon……….back to the cubicle.
Thanks PA………….who would have thought it PA 007…………..a naturalist?…………..OK, cue the 007 sunbathing in the nude jokes.
I hope he doesn’t burn his Goldfinger.
Live and Let Fry
A View To A Thrill
The Man with the Golden Bum
The power of the Bloggers never ceases to amaze me and just a few days after I mentioned that having seen a guest wearing an RCI T – Shirt onboard the this ship that I would like to design a T Shirt that says “Climb This ” ……….and you know what……someone did. Have a look at this brilliant design by Lance.
T-SHIRT DESIGN TEMPORARILY REMOVED
Now, I do not expect that Carnival will sanction the sale of this T-Shirt in our onboard shops however I am sure if lance were to advertise a way that people could buy one direct from here via my blog thingy …………. that would bring a smile to everyone’s face. So Lance……..put me down for one XXXXL please…………….fantastic.
OK, that is it for today. I live in the hope that tomorrow I will wake up and be back to normal. I continue to take the medication although should I be concerned that because of my mixture of pills my bottom sounds like a coffee machine……….Cappuccino anyone?
Goodnight
Your friends
John and Heidi
Filed under: Tales from the Ship, Uma Thurman | Tagged: Splendor Godmother
PUT ME DOWN AS ONE WANTING A SHIRT–GREAT JOB LANCE!! IT IS PERFECT!!! I AM SURE YOU WILL GET LOTS OF REQUEST FOR THEM–JUST LET US KNOW WHEN AND HOW TO ORDER.
THANKS, SHERYL
John,
I’ll take the design to my local tshirt printer in a mall near my house and print it out myself.
That is too awesome of a t shirt to not wear.
On the back though you should write “Carnival, we really Get Out There.” To throw another pun towards their advertising slogan they have going right now.
-Marc G
Lance, I like the t-shirt design. I want one. It looks like the perfect shirt to wear when in the same port with the ship with the empty rock wall on in.
When you get ready to take orders I will put it on my blog also.
BIG ED
PS. Susan is now home but in pain. She will post soon I’m sure. She will be typing with one hand so it may be short.
John, hope you get well soon. I have two questions. First one what has happened to the web cams for the Freedom, and the secomd question is I would like to buy 4 T-shirts, for my cruise in July with Carival. Say hi to your wife. See you in July.
My dear friends John & Heidi,
I love that t-shirt!
First, too bad it wasn’t Mr. PETA who was bitten by the crab. What would he have done? Not possible that he would kick it away, would he? Hmm.
John, what you need is complete rest. A vacation for you and Heidi away from the ships, no cell phones, no blackberry, no computer. And, though it will be missed, no blog thingy for a while. Go to a relatively quiet tropical island and RELAX. No stress, no whiney passengers, no complaints – just you, Heidi, peace and quiet. Your body has to heal.
Doctor Carol’s orders!
Anyway, time for me to get back to work. And I will be looking forward to whatever PA007 has to report for the future.
Have a great weekend, and feel better,
Hugs,
Carol
John,
Nothing can keep you down. The fact that you’re still typing away at this blog and making us laugh with all you’re going through is a true testament to your character. Thank you!
I’m smiling for you even if you can’t.
Hey John,
Hope you’re feeling better soon.
Let’s see………..I’ll bet the gentleman that didn’t seem to know that creatures like Colin the Crab live in the sea has never seen the movie the “Little Mermaid”. That is why manufacturers have to put ridiculous instructions on toasters and hair dryers to NOT be used in the bathtub. How do these people even get out of bed in the morning?
How DO you do it John? How do you not burst out laughing at these people when they come to you with these stories. I guess it keeps the bloggers entertained and we should be thankful.
I suggest you get a book called the “Darwin Awards”. It contains stories of people who have met their demise doing really stupid things.
Maybe Carnival should publish a similar book of stupid things brought to the CD or pursers desk.
Want to publish it with me? We’d make a MINT!
Please keep those great stories coming John as they make us chuckle and thankful that WE have some common sense in our lives.
All the best and smooth sailing
B&D from Canada
Please reply.
John, the April crossing seems to be sold out. Can you tell us the demographics?
LOve the t shirt ! Let me know how to order when they are ready.
Love the T-shirt idea! Will these really be produced for us to buy?
And about the crab bite…same thing happened to me many years ago in Daytona Beach, Fl. It didn’t hurt so much as scare me. I guess crabs aren’t too particular as to what they try to eat.
No answer is required.
“Hi” to Heidi and “cheers” to you,
Myra
Good Afternoon John,
Lance can put me down for two, one small and one XL. Love the design and it’s my sentiments exactly!
Hope you feel better soon. Do the needle thingy I’m sure it will help. At this point what do you have to lose? You’re uncomfortable, not up to your usual charming and “brilliant” self and everyone hates to see you suffering. It can’t be that bad there are alot of people who swear by it.
Well John, what’s the bet going to be for next season. Think about it and so will I, just remember I belong to the Evil Crew so I may (?) ask for suggestions. Be careful! Hmmmmm acupuncture, that sounds interesting. Fatima, wonder if she knows how. No, she would probably use a plastic tube ;D
You take care and give Heidi a hug for me
Joan
JOHN,
A MUST HAVE T-SHIRT!!! LET’S GET THE ORDER THINGY GOING!!!
GET WELL SOON!!
AS I SAID BEFORE ” YOUR MOUTH COULD BE ON THE SIDE OF YOUR FACE, AND YOU WOULD STILL MAKE US WOMEN DROOL!!
LOVE YA, PAULA BAKER
Dear John & Heidi….
A crab bit him! A crab bit him!…..Next thing you know you will need to include a warning about SpongeBob. He and Patrick could be lurking near shore! Please!!! Today I am being somewhat sarcastic in hopes that some folks will “Get A Life”
Please rest and take care of yourself and Heidi!
John & Susan
Hi John and Heidi – I read everyday but don’t often comment. I too, have experienced Bells Palsy. I can empathize with all of your symptoms! Very frustrating, indeed. I suggest you visualize your nerve endings coming back to life. It is the WIERDEST feeling when they do. Kind of like lightening – flicker, flicker, then boom – you can blink. It may take longer than you think – I hope not – but be prepared.
My DH and I returned on 2/26 from an 8 day trip on the Spirit. Shawn is nice – just not you!! There was a Noro outbreak on another ship out of San Diego and I was petrified that the curse of the TA cruise in 06 on the Liberty had returned to haunt me. On to South America next, I think.
Ride this out – rest, eat healthy – keep your eye moist and rinse the yuk out of your mouth often. Chapstick is essential! Remember – this too shall pass.
from Suzanne (not your sister!)
John, How can you not get really sarcastic with people who think such weird things like “Warn us that sea animals,etc. live in the sea?” Wow! That should be the winner of the stupid comment of the cruise.
You sounded like you were feeling better or a least getting used to the ailment. I’m glad your’re willing to try acupuncture as it could help and can’t hurt. (No pun intended.)
Get some rest but I’m glad you are continuing to write the blog as we’d all have an adverse reaction if you quit. Jeri
Oh John, I can truly understand your frustration with some of the Carnival guests. Being a cake decorator we were asked to do some really different things and we tried our best to please our customers. We got more praise than complaint, but oh, the complaints were over the stupidest things it took every thing we had not to go over the half wall and beat someone with a spatula!!!!
I can picture you with a patch on your eye and a half smile and I can say that if I had a complaint and you were the person I would be talking to, I would bust out laughing and forgetaboutit!! *LOL*
And the biggest news: Jeanette and I booked our room for the Blog cruise on the Fantasy on Feb7th next year. John, we need you there so please take care!!!! Next thing on the bucket list: Get more depends!!!
Take care,,,Ciao,,,,Kathleen
Bwahahahahahaha….way to go Lance! Love it!
Nude sunbathing? one word…YIKES!
John, hope you’re doing better. Met the nicest couple from London at the store yesterday. I amazed them with my knowledge of spotted dick.
Sending extra love and big, squishy hugs to Susan and Maria.
It is good news on Susan being home. Thinking of Maria today, don’t know what time her surgery is but hope things are going well.
My father’s fiancee has been in the hospital for over 6 months now and it is wearing on him and her family. He drives a little over an hour each way a couple of days a week to visit her. She has gotten over all the illness but during they had to put a trac in her throat for her to breathe. And they still have not weaned her off the ventilator at night. Working towards that. Dad has said worse case they can send her home with the vent and trac and he can take care of her there. He thinks she is getting strong enough that they won’t have to though. So we just wait and see what happens. She just started on puree food this week and next week they hope to have her on solid food again.
Lance: I want one of those t-shirts
And I totally agree on the Darwin Awards we could call them “Carwin Awards” ok maybe not……. anyway, why on earth complain about a crab in the sea?????? Where else would they live?
Keep your head up and work on getting better. Cheers to Heidi as well.
Deanna
John,
Lance is a true talent, I’m glad to be friends with him. Lance look into cafepress.com if you want to sell them. Yes we are all happy to hear susan is home and marie is doing well. As far as Mr. Custowe yes there are things living in the ocean some small some big (ok thats just ED) and some want to taste you don’t worry, and don’t let Mr. PETA catch you flinging the crab via it’s leg across the ocean because it might be cruel. instead bring him home or back to the pier and let someone boil him up for you. Hope you eye is feeling better soon John, feel free to use any of those joke i sent you the other night. Best to Heidi. And of course Roberto who has been too quiet lately. Roberto where are you?? Does PA007 need to come rescue you. Oh and PA007 I could never picture you as a naturalist not that I even know what you look like.
Cheers
Kevin
PS I have a ASTON MARTIN and it’s going up for sale anyone want it make me a offer.
Good Afternoon again John
I forgot to mention I vote for another Carnival Bloggers Cruise for our Third Annual. We like to let our “dreadlocks” down…….so?
Take care
Joan
Hi John/Heidi:
Just thinking of you as you go through recovery. I hope you see some improvement shortly.
I hope Susan and Maria are doing ok.
Hope you have a nice weekend and this coming voyage is less “animal-themed” than that from this past week.
A very enjoyable blog today.
That would be a cute tshirt
Take care,
David
John,
So glad to read that Susan is back home and mending, continued prayers from the blogger family, and for Susan as well.
The T-Shirt design is AWESOME, well done Lance!!! Please have them available ASAP, I will take one (four really) in white and one (ditto) in black!!
John, I do think it may be some fun to have Carnival hire some pro’s to climb our stack in a few well chosen ports next to the empty rock wall thingys some time…now THAT may give their CD’s something to talk about :>)
BTW, I love the new Carnival ads…it’s so hard to wait for the next cruise….when those are on…I may have to and find another to book before October gets here.
Thanks for all you do for us, and thanks to Heidi for all she does for you, I can’t wait to meet you both!
Eva
Good afternoon Mr. Heald. You really get a group of weird winners on a cruise ( PETA man, German nude couple and of course crab toe man ), I wonder if you could write a book about all of the many unusual people that you have met on your cruises. I’ll bet it would be a very large book. Next year I’m taking a cruise on the Valor. Does the Valor have a large screen to show movies and other things so I can lay outside on the deck? I understand it is just about the same with the Freedom. I loved being on the Freedom when I went on my cruise this year. Would you be able to tell me who the CD will be on the Valor next year
( January 25 th ). Will Heidi be able to write a blog again? Just wondering. I hope you are getting better my friend. Ciao.
Paul F. Pietrangelo
Love the t-shirt Lance! Great design! Darn, I’d hoped nobody’d noticed about Heidi wanting a Canadian hoodie… so I didn’t say anything more! I will bring one anyway when I come in May… although she may have a closet full by then! We have our eyes on some cute ones! Take care John. Gloria
Good Afternoon, John & Heidi!
I almost spit out orange juice all over the monitor and keyboard while reading this blog. That wouldn’t be good since this is my work computer… Your humor is priceless and one of a kind! Love the new T-Shirt design.
Big Ed – Thanks for the update about Susan! Glad she is back home and I will keep her in my prayers along with Maria as well.
Have a great weekend, take it easy, and get well soon!
-Alex G.
John,
Sorry about the Bell’s Palsy. It should pass soon. I had it many years ago. It lasted nearly 2 weeks, then went away. I agree that acupucture would be worth trying. I tried acupucture for back pain and it helped a lot.
Lances design is awsome! I want a shirt too! Lance, you need a website now!
How is Alan doing?
Hello to Heidi!
Dearest lopsided John.
Although I can imagine how this (unmentionable mentionable) is wearing on you, I must say that your sense of humor has not waned one little bit. I think I would have had a difficult time NOT offering Mr.Crabtoe the cocktail sauce.
On a sad note John, turns out that hubby and I could not work out the logistics and we will not be sailing with you for the 8 day Splendor sailing (insert big BIG sad hound dog look here). We will still be sailing on the Victory July 26th but it just won’t be the same as being on the Splendor with you and Heidi. I did make darling hubby promise to take me on the Splendor next year so now I just have to figure out when and where too.
Take care John and please give my best to Heidi.
Looking forward to seeing you on Bloggers V.2.
Sallie
P.S.
Isn’t Lance the most talented man ever! Lance, please hold 3 T’s for me.
Hi John: Hope you are feeling much better. As my mother used to say “Nothing is Forever.” I’m praying that soon this BP will be a thing of the past and you will be your old self again. Now, that Climb This t-shirt is fantastic. I want one. Also, will be ordering a blog thingy shirt for our Jan. 10t Splendor Cruise.
God Bless you and Heidi and stay sweet.
Regards,
Terry
Here in Atlanta there is possibility of getting crabs, oh, I mean getting bite by crabs; should we alert all visitors.
John,
Great blog, great pictures, FANTASTIC T-SHIRT!!
Put me down for several!!! TOO COOL!!!
I’m glad to hear you’re going to give the acupuncture thing a go. It can’t hurt… at least not much! It may well help. Let us know how it goes.
Wonderful news that Susan is home. Just being home is strong medicine. I’m keeping her and Maria in my thoughts and prayers.
I have made note of the fact that there may well be sea creatures in the sea. I promise to not hold Carnival responsible for Stingrays being at Stingray City or for Dolphins being at Dolphin Cove. I will, however, be quite upset if I should ever find fish in an aquarium or milk in a milk bottle… Everything has it’s place, ya’ know…
Keep that stiff upper lip and wonderful sense of humor!
Please pass along my thanks to the lovely Heidi, the Famous Roberto and the Stupendous Stephanie!!!
Cheers!!
GregB
John:
The best part of Lance’s design was the BACK of the ship that says (in a beautiful design) which showed just how much “climbing” some other cruise line would have to do:
2007 CRUISE INDUSTRY AWARDS LEADER
Ocean & Cruise News ~ “Best Cruise Value”
in 4 Star Category – 14th Consecutive Year.
Travel Weekly ~ Reader’s Choice Awards
“Best Domestic Cruise Line” & Carnival Spirit
“Best Overall Ship & Best Sales & Service”
Southern Living Magazine ~
“Prestigious Best Cruise Line” Award
Porthole Magazine ~ 9 Reader’s Choice Awards,
Including… “Best Children’s Program”,
“Best Entertainment” and “Most Value for the Money”
The Society of Incentive & Travel Executive’s
“Most Outstanding Travel Reward Program”
Seatrade Insider ~ John Heald
“Seagoing Employee of the Year”
TravelAge West ~ Harry’s Supper Club
“Best Alternative Dining Facility”
Cruise One/Cruises Inc. ~ “Most Improved Cruise Line”
World Travel Awards ~ “Leading Cruise Brand”
**********
I must comment on the Colin the Crab incident.
I was reading this to DJ and he said (in a way that only he can )
“Geez, even I knew that!”
We are headed out on the Legend in 65 days. (May 11th) Josh (our oldest son who will be out of college by then) will get to be on this one with us.
David is going to do something called “SpiSea” in Roatan with DJ. It is where you snorkel without getting wet on some kind of powered craft that you lay down on???
They have these made for two people, so that DJ won’t have to be by himself.
Should be fun!!!
As much as we would miss you, I must agree with Ms Carol S…that total rest would be best.
Your health is our first concern!!
Linda
DJ says “HI”!
Ok, ok I give up my stubborn friend is blogging makes you happy do it. We will be very happy reading it. I can hide that.
Then do as Heidi tells you and go out of the ship do something different, you and Heidi need the distraction and at least for a few hours hide and leave the strawberry thingy on the ship. 
Remember this palsy thing will go away eventually no damage done you are lucky. SMILE!! Please Mr Happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
An XXXXL huggo for you and Heidi
Nanni
PS: This family will keep praying for you and is here for anything you might need.
John,
Sounds good, you better call on your CarniCopter. Sometimes the letters posted on the blog are unreadable, but I can read the last one and it must be some kind of joke. I think you should have Heidi call the Somethingskis and ask them why they think you are unprofessional. If they think they can do a better job, have them be cd for a day and wait til they have to deal with all the jackasses like themselves. I think it would have been pretty nice to see how PETA guy would’ve reacted if he were bitten by the crab… maybe ALL living things wouldn’t like him. Spotted Dick, now that’s British. I wikipediad it because I did not want to do an image search if you catch my drift. Looks pretty interesting. Next time I’m across the pond I’ll have to try it. Meanwhile you have the grillmasters fry you up a double bacon cheeseburger.
_BigMike
Chief, Blog Security
Another Splendor question: What time will we be allowed to board the ship in Dover and what time will we be kicked off the ship so the next group of lucky ducks will be able to sleep in our beds? I know the times you give will not be set in stone, just trying to get an idea of where to stay the night before the cruise and trying to figure out the best way to get to Heathrow the day we are kicked off the ship.
Thanks,
Barb
John I will buy one or more of those shirts lets sell them it loohs cool, tell heidi hello Deb and Harold
Excellent design Lance….. although entirely unsanctioned by Carnival…..it would/will/should/can certainly be a hit.
Hi John and Heidi
If your blog photos today were intended to make us hungry and wish we were the ones about to be served………..it worked! Wish my next cruise was sooner. Thanks for the photos and love the blog thingy.
I also was hoping you would say the crab bitten man was the peta guy!
Cabin 7211 sorry there allways has to be that one @*%&#.
You said I made your day ………That brings a big smile to my face. You make ours everyday. Thank you!
Hope you are feeling better soon.
Mary
John, I would love to have one of the Carnival t-shirt’s……they’re great. LOL
Is there anyway to make some of the letters you post bigger? I couldn’t really read the letter from Joe Black because it was so small. Thanks…..XXX
I can’t believe that the guest complained about his toe getting bitten by a crab. Wouldn’t common sense tell you that a) Carnival wouldn’t be responsible and b) that you take a chance when you go in the ocean? I guess some people just don’t have any common sense……..
I hope your last 2 weeks on the Freedom are better than they have been lately with silly passengers.
Have a great weekend, John and Heidi.
Cindy
Hi John,
Sure hope you feel better soon. I don’t know how you keep coming up with this hilarious stuff.
One time when my husband and I went to NYC to see the Statue of Liberty, a pigeon crapped all over my shirt. Now it wasn’t a small pigeon, it had to be the biggest mutant pigeon in the whole world, cause it covered the entire back of my shirt. I didn’t have you to blame then…hahaha… But since the Statue came from France, well, 2+2=4, right?
Hello John & Heidi,
John, I’d like to add myself to the list of people recommending acupuncture. My husband and I had a wonderful cruise on the Glory last Feb. His back was bothering him, so when we got on the ship he got wheelchair assistance. While onboard, he tried acupuncture for the first time. After three treatments, he walked off the ship, and didn’t even need his cane. We are now “believers”. (Say “hallelujah”!) Please try to rest as much as possible. We don’t want you blogging from the hospital!
I’d like to get two of those t-shirts. One large, one XL, please. I think the design is brilliant!
Thanks so much to Kuki from Cruisemates and Greg B. from Cruise Critic for responding to my plea to be included. I feel so much better now. You will both be hearing from me soon.
I can’t believe that guy who got bitten by the crab. Honestly, truth is stranger than fiction. I loved the fractured German. As someone pointed out, the German word for bra is also very funny. Actually, several of their words are droll. We call a tall builder a skyscraper; the Germans call it a “cloud scratcher”.
Thank you again John for the hard work you put in on this blog. Besides the joy you bring to the passengers on your ship every week, you bring joy to so many thousands of blog readers as well. I think Carnival should give you a raise. I’m looking forward to the Bloggers’ Cruise, when I can actually meet you and Heidi in person.
Hi John: I want that shirt for Mike, how can we order one? John, you said you are leaving March 22nd, will you take a vacation? Not skiing I hope! When will you be back onboard a Carnival ship? Guess the Splendor is your next assignment, right? Will you be blogging while gone? Is Heidi going to do a blog this week as promised? Hope you are feeling better, try and take it easy! Your friends, Linda & Mike P.S. Yes John, we are all family, that is why we all care about each other!
BTW I was trying to ignore that last letter but I cant. I think is hard and mean and you dont deserve it.That people should take their money and go to another cruise line and see if the completely healthy CD can make them laugh and takes care of them as you do. Oh I wish I have that smily face with the tongue sticking out to put it here or whatever Climb this!
John,
Hope you are feeling well soon. We will be on the Freedom in April for the transatlantic to Rome.
Hope to meet you and Heidi then as I have been reading your blog thingy for a year now. Also can you help us with a small problem. I know that Carnival has welcome parties for returning guest. We have sailed with Carnival, starting with the Mardi Gras
in June 1979. Our Honeymoon. When I asked our travel agent I was told they could not find us as return guest on any Carnival ships. I have pictures,
so I know I was not spending too much time in the bars or sun. There are 8 of us return guest and would love to attend the past guest parties. Any help you could give is much appreciated.
Thank you in advance.
Michelle Mutz
John,
CLIMB THIS will be a popular underground Tshirt!!! We all seem to have the same idea and will have it made locally!
The Farcus Funnel holds such charm for me. I LOVE the unique shape and bright colors! I love the Funnel deck on the Fantasy ships! Just because it surrounds the funnel!! It IS Carnival and just curls the sides of my mouth and makes my whole attitude change for the better whenever I see it!!! That funnel means CRUISING!!!
Regards to everyone!!
Lambie
John,
I have had 2 Fun Days here in Fort Lauderdale at Cruise3sixty convention…Looking forward to seeing you possibly Sat onboard as we are inspecting the ship and having lunch with you mate !!! I visited the Princess/Cunard Commodore lounge and while we were all watching the new Love Boat series with Capt.Stubing (GavinMc)… I mentioned that You and Your Blog Fans were considering a Cunard Bloggy Trip….The Reps said they all read your blog daily and had also heard the chat about the possibility….All said Bring it on!!……Today I ate lunch with other travel agents…one said she would never ever cruise or sell Carnival…I asked Why????She said back in 1986 she sailed on a Fantasy class ship,had a Oceanview cabin and her porthole was dirty…..I told her to please try Carnival 2008 and she would certainly be impressed……Unbelievable from a front line seller of travel to be so shallow???
Reporting from Broward Co.Conv.Center
Mark / McFrog2
Hi John
I am so sorry about the man that got bit on the toe in the ocean. Imagine, a sea creature living in the ocean. Aren’t we all happy that it wasn’t the nude sunbather??
Lance, you did a SUPER job on the t-shirt design. I would like to have two when they come available for order. Please let me know when that time comes.
Until next time, take care and give big hugs to Heidi for me.
Gloria aka Sue
Hi John,
You really do need to slow down a bit & get some rest. No need to feel guilty because you absolutely didn’t become sick on purpose. I’m still expecting good results from the acupuncture so just jump on in there & do it. I’m sure your description of the treatment will be a good topic for your blog. I promise it doesn’t hurt.
Glad to hear you’re better? Chin up, your wit is so uplifting! I’m on the Freedom next week and you damn well better keep those F****** Crabs 50 miles away from the vicinity of my ship!!!!!!!
God Bless, Get Well.
Hi John,
I am sorry you didn’t get to enjoy Ocho Rios. Jerk chicken is soo delicious.
Your story of the tardy young women, and specifically your mention of intentionally missing the boat, got me thinking. I will be on Carnival Splendor for the Oct. 5th 2008 Eastern Med trip. One of the areas that has come to fascinate me on that intinerary is Marmaris. I was wondering if one could miss the ship at that port and rejoin in Izmir? I’m not sure if this is the forum for such a question, but if so, I would appreciate details. If you wish, you could email me privately. Thank you as always for your time.
Craig
Put my name in for a T shirt too.
By the way, we just got 10″ of snow today in Cincinnati and I’m looking at a picture of me and my wife Diane being kissed by a dolphin in Ocho Rios while on the bloggers cruise.
We had so much fun we have already booked the same cruise for next January 17th.
John, hope you’ll be there.
I want to buy a CLIMB THIS SHIRT!!!!!Pleeeeese!Rest is very important in your recovery John this I know,please rest between your shows,My 1st cruise was with U on the Glory THAT hooked me,Carnival all the way since then,waiting for my husband to be treated for bladder cancer has yet to be graded probably next week we will know,he loves to cruise too hoping for April 09 on the Triumph,I think the large screen out door theatre will be added by then,please let us bloggers know if this T-shirt can be purchased I will wear it PROUDLY!!
John hope you feel better very soon. You know it gets a little tough when you have 3 Monday’s in one really long week, but at least I have your blog to look forward too. Thanks for the laughs, I really enjoy your blog.
John -
I know you are being a real trooper, but you really do need to slow down until this Bell’s Palsy clears up, at least partly. Do I have to send Sheriff Roscoe to put you in the brig?
I am not suggesting that you give up everything, but I see this situation as an opportunity for the entertainment staff to get some valuable experience.
Think about it for a moment – you are mentoring a great group of support personnel – I recognize James and Adele from the Transatlantic and know their capabilities. You also have the great resource of Heidi to lean on.
The experience for them would be invaluable. Give them the task of doing the Morning Show as co-hosts with Heidi. Let them do the announcements, the guest entertainment show and Legends show, the island tour talks, maybe even the Marriage Show. You can always be there lend support, but there is no need for you to do everything. Save yourself for the Bedtime Story.
I am sure that people will understand if you are somewhat in the background at this time. You are sick, my friend, and need to give yourself some recovery time. Stop doing Carnival Splendor Capers. And, whatever you do, get off the ship – even if you do not feel like it.
Keep this behavior up and I am going to have to get Heidi working for me – and you don’t want Heidi on your case, do you?
JustJon
Hello John & Heidi:
Love the T-Shirt design by Lance. If it ever goes to print..put me in for two since we are going to be on the Splender for the August 6th sailing. Can’t wait to have you again for our CD. We had you in 2006 when we took the Liberty out of Italy. This is one of the main reasons I agreed to go on this up coming trip. We are also bringing 2 other couples with us so they can laugh the entire trip with us. My husband is certain we had you years ago when we first starting cruising with Carnival. It is amazing how a CD can either make or brake your cruise. Went on RCI last year for the first time and the CD was one of the worst we had. It just but a damper on the cruise along with how they handled excursions. With Carnival the people with shore excursion tickets get to get off first if it is close to the time of docking. On RCI there is no concern with the people who have tickets. Everyone just ran to the gangway and jammed it up. Unfortunatley this made us late for our paid excursion.Hopefully Carnival never goes to this method.
Can’t wait to see you and Heidi in August. Hope you get better soon. Just do yourself a favor, and try to get as much rest as you can. If not, the BP will just linger on longer.
Pam “L”
I Love the shirt put me down for one. I would wear it proudly.
Thank you very much for taking care of our dinner request.
Will you and Heidi still be on the ship on March 22? Maybe we could say hello before we board without you
Hmm bitten by a crab, in the sea, now how is that possible? LOL
Thanks for the laughs,
Michelle & Tom
John & Heidi:
Looks like the shirt is a hit! I would love to have two for my cruise on the Valor since that wall follows us around the caribbean. Do you think I would get any reaction from RCL passengers? It could be a fun day!
I will start working on the letter for Chris Jefferson. I want to dig up my scrapbook from the cruise I met him on and copy some of the pics I have with him and send them with the letter. I will work on that. I don’t want to send it too early since I have 6 months (TODAY!!!) until our cruise.
Susan B, we hope you recover very quickly! We will keep you in our prayers!
Let us know if the Acupuncture helps. It may be a breakthrough therapy for Bell’s Palsy victims!
“Climb This” !
Now there’s a T-shirt I would wear !
I hope you’re taking care of yourself, John ! To heck with the show must go on bit! That’s why I’m shot to hell ! We laugh when I try to get out of bed in the morning and can name each injury by the show and city! Oh yeah, not to mention the 14 shows I did one week for Frederic Apcar with “walking-pneumonia” ! Let Heidi take over for a couple of days and give yourself a break!! I bet she knows your routine backwards!
Kathy (and Paul )
Hello John and Heidi!!!!
all I can say is…. warning that there are crabs in the ocean…… that is good……… so what is next to warn everyone about? ………….maybe I should not go here, don’t want to give Mr Murphy any ideas. oh I cant help it just look out for the mosquitoes in the rainforest…… my Kevin made me…….
Best to you and Heidi
the one
and only 1
Heidi-Beth
the noble angel of the …. Krewe
Me too! Me too! I want one of the t-shirts as well! Best idea I’ve seen in ages.
And hang in there John. You could be here in Ohio where we are under a blizzard warning expecting over a foot of snow! At least you’re warm and tropical…
Greetings John…
Hope your patch isn’t growing fungi….. Now…. about my favorite Connery movie… One i enjoyed very much was the “Untouchables”…The scene in the church when he says to Kevin Costner…” If they kill one of yours… You kill two of theirs…” He’s a great character actor… Bout the Trevi Fountain…. ummmm… mishap…. chew a wad of gum…swallow it & it solves your problem..
The Mrs. & I are disappointed that you won’t be on the Freedom mar. 29th sailing… but hey…. theres always anudder (sounds like a cow thingy) time…
Tell Mr. “My toe got bitten by a crab” not to sit under any coconut/palm trees…. would probably sue the whole island if a coconut fell on his head……
Get well john
Cheers to you & heidi
Hi John -
First time poster. Will be on the 2009 Blogger’s Cruise and if I get even 1/4 of the enjoyment I get from reading your blogs, I know we will be in for a treat. Mom and I are looking forward to meeting you!
Its a darn good thing Colin the Crab decided to stay in the ocean as opposed to stowing away to seek out your German friends.
Would have made a good blog story though. LOL
John how much longer are you going to be on the Freedom? I want to book a cruise in a couple weeks but I want to make sure that you will be there. Thank you so much for answering.
Please reply ASAP! Sorry to bug again but can you tell me how much longer you are the CD on the Freedom, I want to book a last minute cruise and I want you have you as a cruise CD so please write back ASAP! Thank you so very much you are the bomb!
Good evening Mr. Heald. This has been a very interesting blog lately. With the German nude people, PETA man and of course crab toe man. I’ll bet that you could write a book about all the different unusual people that you have met in your days as a CD. I know I would buy it because I like a good laugh. By the way Mr. Heald, could you tell me who will be the CD on the Valor next January 2009 because I have arranged for another cruise next year and I was just wondering who it would be. When will Heidi ever do another blog? I hope that many of the people who read your blog will say a small prayer tonight for Susan. It seems that she will be coming home. That is a good sign. Also, take good care of yourself. It doesn’t sound like you’re really listening to the doctor and Heidi. Rest and take a break. Like Nanni said, take a little break. We are all worried about you. Ciao my friend.
Paul F. Pietrangelo
Please reply – Who will be the CD on the Triumph 5/17/08 and how do we get a confirmation number so we can check our seat assignments with the air carrier when Carnival books the flight?
Love the shirt – I will take 2 let us know how we can order if they are going to be made up. We have a fan of the empty rock wall at work so I need something to wear. The Blizzard did hit Cincinnati as predicted. Wow they do get it right once in a while. 7″ of blowing snow and 30+ MPH winds. Oh how far off May 17th seems. Keep up the great work with the thingy.
Linda Hernacki:
Here is the schedule John posted a few weeks ago.
CARNIVAL FREEDOM UNTIL MARCH 22ND
MARCH 22ND – MARCH 25TH – HOTEL IN MIAMI
MARCH 25TH – JOIN EMERALD PRINCESS IN FORT LAUDERDALE
APRIL 1ST – DISEMBARK EMERALD PRINCESS IN ANTIGUA AND FLY TO UK
APRIL 2ND – ARRIVE IN LONDON
APRIL 3RD – FLY TO DENMARK TO BEGIN 18 DAY TRIP TO EUROPE TO VISIT CARNIVAL SPLENDOR
APRIL 19TH – FLY HOME TO UK
MAY 1ST – JOIN CARNIVAL FREEDOM TO ASSIST WITH FIRST 12 DAY MED CRUISE
MAY 12TH – JUNE 1ST – VACATION
JUNE 1ST – JOIN CARNIVAL SPLENDOR
Hope this helps.
Myra Bushnell
Sir Lancelot rocks again!!! John, you begin my day with a good chuckle, and the CLIMB THIS was a great finale! Duke Dick and I definitely need a pair of these. Glad you are feeling better…sending hugs for the healing process…for you and Heidi! And hugs for the “Evil Crew.”
John, I must apologize for not keeping up with the Blog. When I read that you had Bells I just wanted to share what happened to me about 6 yrs ago. I woke up and thought I had a stroke but thank the Lord it was only BELLS! I was put on Antibiotics right away and then a 3x a week treatment of heat, electric shock and massage to the face muscles. It worked miracles. Before I looked like Quasemoto and after 3 months I was almost back to normal. I dont know what treatment you had but this worked for me.
FOR Susette Loewenstein: John just mentioned in this blog that he leaves the Freedom on March 22nd.
I want a T-shirt!! It would be great to have a lot of passengers wearing the T-shirt, standing on the deck as we pass one of ‘those’ ships and we can salute them as we or they pass!! I can see it now!
John and Heidi – you need to take a vacation to Jamaica NOW so you can hear “No problem mon” all of the time….keep your worries behind you!
John, I really hope you wake up soon without the bell’s palsy. But it’s great you still have your sense of humor!
Splendor – 8/18/08
Triumph -2/7/09 – Bloggers cruise!!
Take care and see you both soon!
I wonder, John, if you might recover from the ailment-that-must-not-be-named faster if you actually did what the doctor recommended and have a bit of COMPLETE REST!!??!!
I’ll bet Heidi is mustering all her will power to keep from whomping you upside your thick skull! *LOL*
Okay, enough feminine frustration with masculine macho madness!
Just think how long your travel talks might become if you manage to include a warning for every possible danger to one’s comfort and safety! “Tomorrow we will be in Ocho Rios. There was a time when passengers would have eight hours to explore and enjoy this beautiful port, but after I have told you about the various attractions this port has to offer, I need to give you a few warnings for your own safety. I’m afraid that will still be going on when we pull into port, and then some. But, I’m sure you’ll enjoy the two hours left for you in Ocho Rios!”
Terri
PLEASE REPLY
hi john,
are you going to be on the 2nd.bloggers cruise in
2008?????
sure hope so,,,,,,it would suck with out YOU.
keep up the bloggin,,,
it makes our day,,,,,
PETA,,,,ummmmmmmmmm steak
hi to Heidi,,,,
we miss the Freedom
we go on the Inspiration in 21 days,,,,
but whos counting.
hugs
tom & jane
new name for ccl ship
THE CARNIVAL ASTON MARTIN
black of course
with freddy on top
John:
Wife and I just completed our 17th on Carnival (would have been 18th, bit I wound up in the hospital with a ruptured appendix 4 days before Xmas and we missed our planned New Years Eve Cruise on Inspiration).
The following is a public service announcement:
We just returned today from the Carnival Glory. I found a woman’s ring (very nice one) in a crevice in the safe (behind the doors). I turned it over to the Pursers Desk on Glory at 7:30 this morning (Mar 8).
So, if anyone was sailing on the Glory recently in Cabin 6423, their ring has been turned in to Carnival.
I hope I have been able to make someone’s day.
Just thought I would post it here (already posted on Cruise Critic Board), because you get such a large viewership.
Cheers,
Tim, MCPO USN Retired.
Hey John,
Last week we were getting off the Freedom in sunshine and 80 degree temperatures. What a difference a week makes. I hope this picture comes through for you. You have had a rough couple weeks, but it is still better than shoveling more than a foot of snow! As for naming the child John, we will take that under consideration regardless of gender.
Hey John,
This time last week we were getting off the Freedom in sunshine and 80 degree temperatures. I hope this picture comes through and makes you smile. You have had a couple rough weeks, be thankful you don’t have over a foot of snow to shovel! Lovely Ohio in winter. I meant to tell you, try shouting O-H at the crowd. $10 says they shout I-O back at you. Hope things get better and for Heavens sake, listen to your doctor and wife!
The Attack of the Cayman Crab! Horrors!
Don’t crabs eat dead things as a rule? Makes you wonder about the passenger’s toes. Euww!
Ah, yes. You must warn against crabs, jellyfish, sea urchins, sharks, moray eels… better make it all sea life in general.
Of course, you’re not safe on land, either! There are wasps, bees, mosquitos, snakes, feral cats, disreputable dogs, con artists, the poop from free-flying birds.
Start revising your port talks right away. And get a panel of lawyers to review them for you. Obviously some guests expect the same inane warnings you find on many products in America.
Of course, it will take 3.2 hours to deliver each talk after the lawyers’ additions — but no passenger can claim he or she wasn’t fully informed.
And, get some %^&(@*# rest so you can get well!!
Lance, I need two of those shirts one in XL and another on L. Just tell us where to order them and how much. We would love to be able to wear them in May on our next cruise.
CarolAnn
John Hope you are feeling better not sure if you got my question about the Valor we are going for two weeks, as we did on the freedom any suggestions and do you know the cd?Couldn’t wait for our trip on the Splendor so off to the Valor April 5 hugs to you and Heidi, please be better Judy and Jim
Hi John
Its Maria from the cruise week March 1-8. Had a great week, hope you are feeling better. As I told you when I saw you toward the end of the week, you need to rest. Tell Heidi to make you lots of tea and put your feet up. Mr. Bells in time will go away with rest. Hugs to you and Heidi
Natalie (aka Marie) Montreal Canada
[...] John heald’s Blog The greatest t-shirt….in the world John Heald’s Blog [...]