Going through Russian Immigration is like being part of a Tom Clancy novel. The flight landed on time and in one piece and after saying a teary farewell to Anna I walked down the steps into a bus and across to a huge grey ugly concrete building. We disembarked the bus and having already completed the Immigration paper that asked the usual questions as well as and, somewhat strangely, “Who do you know in Russia?”
Having filled out the form we then walked toward the booths. Immigration soldiers sat inside and giving them a friendly good evening I was met with a stare as cold as the building we were standing in……….still they were friendlier than the Immigration officers in Miami.
My passport was eventually stamped and this is maybe a good time to remind guests sailing with me on the Carnival Splendor that you must have a visa to disembark the ship unless you are on a ship-purchased shore excursion.
So, after Immigration the Tom Clancy novel became even more real as we headed to Customs which was guarded by two soldiers, armed to the teeth and wearing large gray and red frying pans on their heads.
Your customs form requests you declare how much money you are coming into the country with…………….again, never have I seen this before. I went straight through but Theo our camera operator was not so lucky. He was forced to open every single piece of equipment and power it up. I think this customs officer had been watching a lot of Bond movies and thought that the video camera was actually a Heckler and Koch MP5 machine gun…anyway after realizing that Theo was not an assassin he was cleared off we all went.
Well, here I sit in my hotel room. The time change is now three hours and 8 hours to USA/Canada. I am well and truly knackered, it’s been a long day and my hatred of flying has increased 100%. I am leaving for Los Angeles on the 27th, maybe Murphy will have buggered off and I will magically be upgraded to first class…………….probably not.
My dislike for Estonia Air is complete as they lost Heidi’s bag…….she arrived in Amsterdam, her suitcase is probably being lived in by three families and her clothes being worn by Boris and the guys at baggage handling………harsh words but after the day we have both had probably true.
One thing for sure, I just rode here in the bus and I remember now already just why I love St. Petersburg……..what a place……even at 11 pm and in the rain and viewed by red blood shot eyes.
My apologies for the blog format today, I will try and write a proper one tomorrow including the next blog from Bubba.
Off to bed……………miss you Heidi….xx
Goodnight
Your Friend always
John
Filed under: Europe, Tales from the Ship, Travel
I’m beginning to see a pattern. How were you with maths, John?
Glad you made it in one piece…. Get some much needed rest….. (I’m exhausted just trying to keep up with the bloggites (The new raspberry flavoured bite sized blog morsels) .
Can’t wait to get read el blog thingy from our roving CD….. ala St. Petersburg
John, I am so glad to hear that you made it back to land safely! I think you will find if you read the comments that alot of us loved the rapid-fire blogs of today, so please don’t apologize! Can’t wait to read tomorrows update. Hopefully your hotel is warm and has comfy beds!
Sheryl
HOORAY… You made it!!!
Now, relax!!! For the time being…
lambie
Man, I’m worn out to a frazzle just reading all you two have been through! (Actually, all you and your entire crew have been through. I’m sure they’re all having just as much “fun” as you.) Hopefully you’ll all get a good night’s sleep and be ready to really enjoy…and share enthusiastically…all the wonders of St. Petersburg. BTW it would be much less stressful to just visit St. Petersburg, Florida!
Sorry you had to go to bed without your honey, Heidi. You sounded so saaaaaad. May you be reunited quickly!!
Keep smiling,
Myra
SLEEP WELL IN RUSSIA, PUT A LOT OF PICTURES OF ST PETERSBURG ON FOR ALL OF US TO SEE. CARL
John, I have to ask. What happenned to Raspberry Blog Part 6? Love all the blogs. At least you haven’t forgotten us.
Jo
Glad to hear that you arrived safely in beautiful St. Petersburg. To make your touring more enjoyable, be sure to start your day the way true Russians do – with a shot or two of vodka.
Hi John.
As I will be visiting Tallinn in August 09 on Carnival Liberty, I hope that your trials and tribulations have not prevented you arranging some good tours…
If the SAAB aircraft seems small, try the shuttle to Southampton from Manchester… 38 seats… it’s called a “Dash 8″… well, after seeing it, my wife made a dash to the loo…
High wings mean you get a great view of the ground… but you’re trying to forget that it’s a long way down…
dude! many thanks for all the laughs today, and so sorry they were all at your expense! next time try wearing a tiara through customs, i did! a solid gold plastic one that had lights flashing and the ba was really nice to me! he even laughed…
smiles, bonnie and prince charlie
Dear John
Glad you made it in one piece.
You blogged faster than I could read & work today!
Your fingers need a break!
Sleep well my friend!
Take Care
The Tuckers
Arnold & Elizabeth
What a day you have both had. Glad you both made it safely.
I do not like to fly at all which is why cruising is perfect for me. The only time I have been out of the US has been on a cruise ship.
Looking forward to the photos of St Petersberg. Have fun!
Mary
John:
I feel like one of those silver balls in a pinball machine after hitting blog after blog after blog.
But the ride was well worth it!!
Get some rest….
Linda (Mom of your friend DJ)
Sorry to hear you had such an awful day.
Hope it gets better tomorrow.
Gav and Em
Well, thank you Jo Myerly, I thought I was losing my mind! I read all 7 parts tonight (but missed 6, and kept going back looking for it and realized there was no Part 6. That must be when you were drinking your lunch, and lost track of where you were. HA! You have had quite a day John! And Heidi too losing her luggage in Amsterdam. Hopefully by the time you two team up again she will have it back. I had to laugh when you said you had to remove your shoes. Here in the states you have to do that now to get on a plane. I don’t fly so I thought I would never have to worry about that until our last cruise on the Freedom, they made me take my shoes off!!! Go figure? Anyway, NOW I know why I don’t fly anymore, after hearing all you went thru today. Well if it is 8 hrs. later there, it is actually 3 am and you are having sweet dreams (hopefully) – probably dreaming about Heidi, who I know you must miss. After all who is gonna pack your suitcase when you leave again? Happy Traveling! Linda
Poooooor John, Whewwwwwwww I’m tired just reading what you’ve been thru. While I was reading each one of the Raspberry blogs I was saying to myself, that is why you won’t catch me on an airplane…..
I know you are going to be eternally grateful when you board a Carnival Cruise ship.
S0rry Heidi got separated from her luggage. But unlike you John, she can do a quick shopping trip and replace it all plus a few things extra that she just can’t live without. It’s a woman thingy…….hehehe
Hope you get a good nights sleep and some well deserved rest.
Carolyn
John, glad you arrived in one piece. Sounds like the old Steve Martin movie “Planes Trains and Automobiles”. If you haven’t every seen it…you must!
“Back in the USSR.
You don’t know how lucky you are, boy.
Back in the USSR.”
OF COURSE they had to ask you how much money you are carrying. How else can they make sure they got it all before they let you back out of the country?
Don’t apologize for the blog format, John. I love it! Although I do feel kinda bad about laughing at your suffering.
Here’s a little russian saying for you:
В гостях хорошо, а дома лучше.
(There is no place like home.)
(At least, that’s what I hope it says!)
John, I am sure we are all interested in hearing your thoughts on the Carnival Conquest mutiny story whenever you have time to respond. Until then, keep up the great work.
Hey John,
Did number 6 get lost in the air? Thanks so much for the raspberry flavors today! Have a good rest.
Jan
Sorry you had a horrible flight hope your time in Russia is better.
hello john ,i’m glad you arrive safely after a long and stressful day , and thank you for keeping inform with the blogsitos (little blogs) of today ,tonight you need to sleep and rest well ,we are enyoing every blog as usual, nanni is still in utah,so i am in charge of the blog thingy now, take care and saludos to heidi in amsterdam. un abrazo eugenio (nano)
I’m so glad you made it safe and sound to Russia – what a wild ride. I think I hate flying more and more. Have a shot of vodka and hit the pillow – I can’t wait to see the pictures!
“Debs”
John -
You do realize that an Airbus 319 is a French airplane.
Jon
Get some rest now John and enjoy St. Petersburg… looking forward to the next blog!
Princess Barb
Hi there John, Absolutely loved the blogs by raspberry. What you need to do is take a copy of them with you to L.A. and you will have a hit show. The writers won’t have to do a thing because you already put in the commercial breaks. Although we will have to do something about the “missing” part 6. Was it X rated and therefore had to be deleated???
I really do hope the CD on the Miracle is as good as you because if she or he is I should have a wonderful cruise (only 45 more days til I set sail).
Thanks again for your wonderful blog thingy and take care.
Alan D.
Any one any place can be friendlier than the Immigration officers in Miami. Well on second thought perhaps not the Carey Coach bus drivers in NY!
I am truly glad you finally arrived although I’ve enjoyed the short blogs through out the day. Hopefully you will get a good nights sleep and some good food tomorrow.
Poor Heidi, I do hope her suitcase shows up before you two connect up again.
Sleep well.
St. Petersburg is beautiful. My favorite place in all of Russia (and I’m Russian – Natasha, anyone?) and it has such rich history… very beautiful, I love visiting there more than any other place.
Visas used to be a pain in the bottom, but now I turned 18 I have duel citizenship ;D Hurrah for no more visas!
Here’s hoping Murphy and his law go on their own vacation and you have fun ^^ And that Heidi gets her bag back! …someday.
John,
So glad you are safe and relatively sound in Russia.
I have ALWAYS wanted to visit Russia, particularly St. Petersburg. My wife and I would love to do this cruise in the near future.
Have a shot of some really good Russian vodka (or diet Coke) and get some rest.
Looking forward to the coming photos!
приветствие
Lance and Ilda
Lots of action today John! I’m sorry…I like Bee was trying not to laugh at your misfortune…but you make it sound so funny! Sorry for that Heidi was not there to join in the adventure…but glad for her! But alas, she is now dealing with lost luggage.
If I am ever fortunate enough to travel to Russia, I will make sure it is on the comfort of a cruise ship, hopefully with you as the CD.
Hope things go better for you in St. Petersburg.
Karen R.
P. S. Sue Drip is very pretty…you’re just being an obnoxious brother!
Now I am not easily impressed…….. but John’s last blogs were hilarious …. my poor big brother … sounds like he’s hasn’t had as much fun since our Sunday School outing to the seaside, when the coach had a puncture, John threw-up into his cheese sandwiches, and I wet myself on the roller-coaster.
Hello me old china plates (mates)
You lot are so sweet to be so complimentary … it must have been the vaseline on the lens or the fact that you guys are all drunk already !!! … I say already – it’s only 9am here.
Sorry I have been a naughty blogger recently …. I’ve had a touch of my brothers Murphy-ness … my goodness, the God of Airlines is certainly venting his wrath on the Heald clan !
I was due to fly to the UK on business last night and more importantly to see my parents. The airline I was flying with went bust !! Oasis Hong Kong Airlines took on the big boys and undercut them on their long-haul prices … but the rising fuel prices just knobbled them. So there I was packed and ready to fly and with 2 hours to go…. then an announcement …. liquidation … and I was left hanging on one of those help lines that well … don’t help. So, no light on the horizon for … I’m here in Hong Kong until Murphy decides I am allowed to leave.
Now, I can see you’re all screaming for Heald gossip … am I that evil ??? For sureeeee !!! Can I just apologise to Heidi though … she has always been a goddess … not many people would walk with me the 1 and a third miles of world’s longest pleasure pier in the snow… in December … for a mug of hot chocolate ! Although after reading the reports from Estonia it was a walk in the park !
OK we’re off …..
Let me whisk you back the 80’s … big hair … big shoulderpads …. Rubik’s cubes …. Karate Kid …. and Boy George !!
There was John … with jet black hair .. and African-sunset highlights (ginger/red/auburn/tetien)
There was Alan … with hair
Now Alan had a very very cool car … a Capri made by Ford … it was very popular because ‘The Professionals’ – the English version of Starsky and Hutch – drove one. And the women loved them – women can be so fickle can’t they !!! So the boys took a trip to Blackpool, an English sea-side resort, to see the sights, get some sun and try their hand and their luck with the Northern women – obviously not in that order.
Now staying at a seaside Bed and Breakfast in the UK is a scary experience…. they are mostly run by women who are like that great aunt who scares the b’jeezers outta you. 100 years old, shouts every sentence, smells of moth-balls, wears her hair in curlers and makes you feel guilty for existing. Their ‘hotels’ are dimly lit … so you can’t see the stains on the bed linen and the bathroom is down the hallway or worse on another floor, which always makes you regret NOT packing that bathrobe…. and so my story begins…
Now as much as John and Alan are pals when you enter a shared bedroom with a double bed in it … it kinda leaves you speechless …. so before they could unpack their disco gear (Michael Jackson red ‘Thriller’ jacket and glove) there was frantic furniture re-arrangement as fortunately it was two single beds pushed together. After alot of screeching on the wooden drafty floorboards they moved the beds but one was blocking the door … they could just about squeeze through the gap … bear in mind this was 20 years ago ! Within 3 minutes of completing they’re feung shui – Mrs Harris (wicked witch of the north of England) appeared and screamed that due to health and safely they must sleep together … sorry keep the beds together. So grovelling on the floor for fear of burst eardrums they apologized and moved the beds back.
Unlike us women who like to take a good 45 mins to get ready … maybe a relaxing bath and do our nails … with the boys it’s a quick splash and they’re done. So when John went down to the communal bathroom with his washbag and newspaper it was just to ‘freshen-up’ with a pre-event toilet stop. It’s difficult to explain the lay-out of this bathroom, it was bigger than most of the bedrooms – so they were obviously expecting multi-occupency. It was an L-shape, with a bath around the corner, toilet and sink the size of an espresso coffee cup as you walked in. So in goes John, sits down, makes himself comfortable and begins to read the UK’s finest tabloid financial newspaper The Sun.
Now what happened next is technically not John’s fault …. I mean isn’t there something dangerous about wearing a walkman in the bath …. ??? and are locks put on a door for a reason ?? and the screams were heard by most of the occupants in The SeaBreeze guest house… including the ladies husband….
It seems this rather large lady had decided to take a bath and forgotten to lock the door …. sinking into her bubbles she’d put on her walkman (80’s remember) and a showercap to protect it !! So closing her eyes she was dreaming of Tom Selleck in his tight Magnum PI shorts and Ferrari … now she obviously had forgotten to pack her bathrobe too and all she seemed to have bought to dry herself with was a facecloth. As she got out, to say she was shocked to see John sitting on throne was an understatement and soo all hell broke loose. In between being whacked around the head with a loofer and trying to hold her facecloth to protect her modesty her husband appeared who was twice the size of her and decided to show John some Northern hospitality.
So a good start to the weekend. A double bed, a black eye and another scolding from the witch who warned/screeched ‘3 strikes and YOU’RE OUT’ .
Out the boys went …. had fun, had a drink, a dance, a KFC and retired early in preparation for the next day of ‘bird-watching’ on the beach. What they didn’t realise is that at 11pm on the dot, the doors to the SeaBreeze were well and truely locked. Apparently no-one is allowed to have fun after 10.45pm and you had to be tucked up in bed for lights-out !! As much as the witch heard every commotion during the day, she must have retired to her coffin at the fall of darkness because no amount of knocking was going to rouse her. Alan took an executive decision that throwing stones up at a window might get a kindly resident to let them in. Perhaps Alan is super-strong or there was a sudden up-breeze which gave the stone extra trajectory …. but smashing the window was not their best move at this time.
Being the upstanding citizens that they are ….. they scarpered (remember your cockney rhyming slang) and instead of spending a cosy night in the double bed of the SeaBreeze they spent a cozy night in the front seats of a 1984 Ford Capri with metallic paint, velour bucket seats and an outside toilet !!
Until next time readers
Sue-Drip
xxx
Dats a lotta raspberry blogs.
_BigMike
Security
John..
I feel your pain regarding air travel! …. or I will VERY soon!
Later this morning I leave for Istanbul, on the beginning of a 32 day adventure. 12 night sailing the Greek Islands itin, with Turkey and Egypt, then to the Aker France shipyard, then through the adventurous, and now notorious, new Terminal 5 in London to get to Miami to meet Mrs. Kuki and the 100 cruisemates on the CM 3 Cs Transatlantic group cruise on the Freedom, sailing back to Europe.
I’ll be piling on the frequent flyers, and hopefully having a wonderfully fun adventure.
Hopefully we’ll still be seeing you on the ship when your board in whatever port it is that starts with an M
I’ll be blogging away too.. maybe we can cross blog . lol
Regards,
Kuki
CruiseMates.com
John,
I’m so glad your safe on land again. Hope you don’t have dreams of flying. Please try to leave Murphy at home next time.
Princess Susan
Don’t foegt to buy me a mtrauaska, Russiamn doll.
I’m so glad you’re safe and sound, if just a little bit “knackered”.
After hearing your experiences, I guess my last few flights haven’t been that bad at all (just a few visits from Mr. Murphy). But I’d still rather cruise from NY for now.
I hope Heidi’s ok, get some rest and I can’t wait to hear about St. Petersburg.
Hugs,
Carol
I think most of us enjoy the fact that your blogs have been spontaneous so don’t apologize sharing all the changes you have had to make the last few days. Not so good for you,,,,,but a lot of laughs for us.
Ciao, Kathleen
I hope today is better for you and Heidi. Any idea if she will EVER get ib back? Looking forward to reading more today.
Lori
John:
You’re coming to La-La Land on the 27th? Will Heidi be with you? Any chance Larry & I could take the two of you out to dinner? Would love to see you again!
Terri & Larry
John, Please Reply
You stated, “…you must have a visa to disembark the ship unless you are on a ship-purchased shore excursion.” Will this be the same in Brazil on the B2B2B Splendor cruise , where a visa to leave the ship is several bazillion dollars, and must be secured a century before you travel, with your first born son as a downpayment? We only planned to take the ship’s excursions, or simply not leave the ship in Brazilian ports, which would be a travesty.
Rus Franklin
Suzanne, are you sure it was Murphy or has John put a target on your back also. I think your going to need the help of My Evil Krewe to watch your back. I’m sure Heidi could give us some real good stories too if John would just give her the computer time now and then. She was a big help surprising John with the birthday blast on the last BC.
Keep the stories coming.
KING EDWARD THE BIG
Of The Evil Krewe
Hi John/Heidi:
What a nightmare…I am so sorry you have to deal with the “Russian muscle”.
At least you got through and can see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Hope you at least have a nice weekend.
Thanks,
David
John, Your Sister, like mine (Suzanne S.) is a “hoot”.
Be well and enjoy the many sights.
Jim