I was born with a body that renders me quite incapable of doing anything very well.
I’m rubbish at everything. Tennis? I’m so spectacularly bad, I can only just beat my nephew Luke and he’s 7.
DIY and home improvement? For me this is simply impossible. Even if I attempt something simple, such as hanging a picture, I end up in the ER, the painting ends up ruined and the wall ends up in the garden.
It was the same when I played golf for the first time – I knew there would never be a second. There would be no point. Even if I played every day for 3,000 years, the ball would still never travel more than six inches.


























