“Why can’t you be more like Alan and Danny?” moaned my wife this morning. I replied that the only way I could be like them was to smack myself in the face repeatedly with a frying pan.
However, it wasn’t that she wanted me to be as ugly as they are……oh no……..she wanted me to be more useful around the house. I mentioned yesterday at my continuing despair about today’s electronic devices and that despair deepened this morning as I was tasked to hang a picture in the Thingy’s room. …………sounds easy enough, doesn’t it?
But ummm…………it wasn’t as I will explain shortly. However, before the thousands of readers sit at home thinking what kind of idiot can’t hang a picture…….let me give you my defense.
When your brain goes wrong, you cannot save money by operating on it yourself.
Likewise, when the engine mapping system in your car goes berserk — and if it’s a Renault, Peugeot or anything else French, it will — you can either stand there and scratch your head or you bite the bullet and take it to Billy Bob’s garage and let them charge you a trillion dollars to fix it.
However, when a job needs doing around the house, most people think that they could save a dollar or two if they attempt a spot of DIY. ………………………..This is, of course, total and utter bollocks.
Take the simple job of hanging this picture. Anyone, you might think, can hammer a nail into a wall — but as I proved today…………………. it’s not that simple.
First, no matter what nail I selected, and no matter how gentle I was with the hammer, I managed to remove a huge chunk of plaster from the wall. Imagining that the picture will cover the damage, I persevered until eventually, the nail was in and the picture was up.
But then along comes Heidi who tells me it’s not quite in the right place and that a new hole is required. And so, eager not to remove any more plaster, I decided to use a drill instead. Later, when I got back from the hospital, and someone had been round to fix up the wiring I drilled through, I gave it another go….a bit to the left this time. As instructed by the Mrs.
And eventually, after the drill bit thingy had skidded around the wall chewing up the paintwork, and a few doors, you have a hole into which you must now insert something called a Rawlplug.
This is impossible. It will either be slightly too small, in which case it will disappear into the cavity of your wall and be gone for good, or slightly too large, in which case you will attempt to tap it in with a small hammer, this will break the Rawlplug, and your attempts to get the ruined splodge out of the hole again will cause more plaster to come down.
Eventually, after half a day or so, you will have no wall left. I swear to God that if every man in the land attempted to hang a picture this afternoon, by six o’clock this evening, not a single house would be left standing in the entire country.
My tip then, should you wish to hang a picture, is call a builder immediately……as I wish I had done. Yes, it would have cost me money and yes it would have been embarrassing to have to admit to Bob the Builder (or as we live in the UK and all builders are from Poland, admit to Bobski the Builderski) that I didn’t have the skills to hang a picture on the wall…..but I wouldn’t have cared. I could have sat here blogging to you earlier, with a cup of tea and not slaving over a hot hammer trying to hang a picture of the bloody Teletubbies on the wall.
Another job people imagine they can handle themselves is wiring up a television. Not that long ago, it was easy. You pushed a wire into the back and in just a few minutes, you would have it tuned in to the three available channels.
Now though, thanks to Tivo HD, the PlayStation and the invention of the DVD, anyone wishing to wire up a television must first obtain a degree in astrophysics or grow a beard.
As I mentioned yesterday, the TV in our living room is so out of sync it makes every program look like a Japanese horror movie. Today the screen just says “Video 1. No Sync,” every time I turn it on.
I have been round the back of course, in a manly “I can do this” sort of way, but when you are around the back you cannot see what the screen is showing, unless your eyes are detachable or your arms are 12 feet long.
And since mine aren’t, I always emerge after a very sweaty day or so in a forest of dusty spaghetti to find the screen says “Video 2. No Sync.”
Because the back of a modern television looks very much like the back of a space shuttle, my tip, should you wish to watch something important, is to call an electrician immediately ……….I just did and Edski the Electricianski will be here sometime between tomorrow and March.
Heidi has also been thinking about security and wants new locks put on the windows. She imagines that men can easily fit our own window locks. ……….”Yes,” I said……… In the same way that you might imagine you can easily circumcise your own son.
My tip, then, if you wish to keep the thieving scumbags out of your house……..is to buy a gun.
Smoke alarms. Anyone who does not have such a thing in their house is a mental. Or they will be, when the house catches fire and they are scrambling to get out.
It is extremely easy to fit a smoke alarm yourself and you do not need a specialist.
However, when its battery goes flat, do not imagine that you can change it on your own.
I did and my arms were above my head for such a long time that all the blood drained away and I caught gangrene. And then I tripped and fell down my stairs.
My tip then, when buying a smoke alarm, is to insist its batteries will last for at least a thousand years.
We are told in these dark and difficult times, when people are eating their own pets and burning their children’s teddy bears just to stay warm, that the most important thing is the environment.
And that as a result, you must insulate the roof of your house. There is an even better reason for getting up in the loft. If your roof is lined with a nice fluffy pair of pajamas, it will reduce your heating bills.
However, I do not recommend that you attempt to line your house yourself because if you go in the loft, you will tread in the wrong place and fall heavily into the bathroom.
This will negate the savings you were attempting to make. Because there’s no point trying to cut costs if it means you end up hopping through the Pearly Gates with a toilet brush up your bottom.
Everyone used to want to be a banker or a money broker….not anymore …… nope …….the job everyone should want to have is that of a builder, plumber or electrician.
That’s because during these dark times of crunching credit every Tom, Dick and Harry will try to save money by doing the home repairs themselves………and once everyone has made a complete mess of everything, there will be even more work around……putting it all back together again.
Good evening everyone.
I want to say a big thank you to Tony who, in Stephanie’s absence, has been posting the blogs. There are lots of comments to answer and I will be doing those over the weekend. Talking of Stephanie, I am glad to tell you she is doing well after her surgery. Hopefully she will return to work soon and I am sure she would want me to thank you for all your kind words.
The comments continue to be such an important part of the blog thingy and as ever I will reply to each and every one that I am asked to do so. However, I did receive one or two today quite upset that I did not respond immediately. One even suggested that I stop “wasting every ones time with stupid comedy blogs and stick to sorting out people’s complaints.”
Well, obviously, I am here to help but please be patient with me and with respect, I really do not want the blog just to become a negative board.
Therefore, please keep your comments coming and I promise that within seven working days of you having written a comment marked “John, please reply”…….I will have done so.
One talking point at the moment is the fuel surcharge. I received a comment today from faithful reader Keith Overby who is frustrated at me for ignoring this subject and for that I apologize. The reason I had to wait in my reply was because if this press release that officially came out earlier today.
CARNIVAL CORPORATION & PLC TO SUSPEND FUEL SUPPLEMENT FOR ITS NORTH AMERICAN BRANDS EFFECTIVE DEC. 17
MIAMI (December 4, 2008) – As fuel prices continue to decline, Carnival Corporation & plc (NYSE/LSE: CCL; NYSE: CUK) has announced that it will suspend fuel supplements for its six North American brands effective for all voyages departing on or after December 17, 2008.
The fuel supplement suspension applies to the following brands: Carnival Cruise Lines, Costa Cruises, Cunard Line, Holland America Line, Princess Cruises and The Yachts of Seabourn.
A refund of the fuel supplement will be made in the form of a shipboard credit for all bookings within the final payment period for departures on or after December 17, 2008. All bookings outside of the final payment period for departures on or after December 17, 2008 will be adjusted to remove the fuel supplement and guests will be provided with a revised final payment amount.
“As the price of oil has dropped to $46 per barrel, it has now reached a level where we are able to suspend the fuel supplement,” said Bill Harber, director of marketing for Carnival Corporation & plc. Harber cautioned that the fuel supplement could be re-instated if oil prices increase significantly.
The company reserves the right to re-instate the fuel supplement for all guests at up to $9 per person per day (except Seabourn, which would be up to $15 per person per day) should the price of light sweet crude oil according to the NYMEX (New York Mercantile Exchange Index) increase above $70 per barrel.
“It is our hope that fuel prices have stabilized and will remain at a more rational level. The complete suspension of the fuel supplement makes the inherent value of a cruise even greater and that is increasingly important in the selection of a vacation in the current economic climate,” Harber added.
The fuel supplement for five of the six Carnival Corporation & plc brands is currently $9 per person per day for the first and second guest (not to exceed $126 per person per voyage) and $4 per person per day for third, fourth and fifth guests (not to exceed $56 per person per voyage). Seabourn’s fuel supplement is $15 per person per day for the first and second guest (not to exceed $210 per person per voyage) and $4 per person per day for third and fourth guests (not to exceed $56 per person per voyage).
Carnival Corporation & plc is the largest cruise vacation group in the world, with a portfolio of cruise brands in North America, Europe and Australia, comprised of Carnival Cruise Lines, Holland America Line, Princess Cruises, The Yachts of Seabourn, AIDA Cruises, Costa Cruises, Cunard Line, Ibero Cruises, Ocean Village, P&O Cruises and P&O Cruises Australia.
Together, these brands operate 88 ships totaling more than 169,000 lower berths with 17 new ships scheduled to enter service between March 2009 and June 2012. Carnival Corporation & plc also operates Holland America Tours and Princess Tours, the leading tour companies in Alaska and the Canadian Yukon. Traded on both the New York and London Stock Exchanges, Carnival Corporation & plc is the only group in the world to be included in both the S&P 500 and the FTSE 100 indices.
Now, I want to thank PA 007 for getting this to me so quickly and if you have any questions about this please let me know and I will answer them for you with the help of Bill Harber, Carnival Corporation’s director of marketing. It’s great news though and let’s hope that oil prices remain realistic for a long time to come.
In the next few days I will be planning more events and activities for the February 2009 bloggers cruise. I can tell you that one such activity will be a press Q&A session. This proved very popular last year and we have another large press group who are sailing again with us on-board the Carnival Fantasy. They have all agreed to take apart again so we can ask this well-traveled group of professionals their thoughts on the state of journalism, the cruise industry and beyond.
Well, Christmas is here and it’s time to deck the halls with boughs of environmentally sustainable holly, ’tis fast approaching the season to be jolly. And while you’re at it, bring out the illuminated Santas, the amusing flashing reindeer and the nativity scenes.
Unless, that is, you live in the UK where it is illegal to utter the C-word. The village council where we live has decided to organize a multicultural Festival of Lights instead of traditional Christmas illuminations. ……..and while I have the total and utter respect for all religions………this is totally and utterly bonkers.
They have decided to call this season “Winterval” to cover the winter festivals of Diwali, Hanukkah and Christmas. I would love to meet the chairman of the council who made this decision and kick him in the ding dong merrily on highs ……Anyway….lets talk about Christmas shopping instead before my head explodes.
Obviously we are all starting to buy our loved ones Christmas gifts…..sorry……I said the C word……..I meant Winterval gifts. Heidi showed me something on a website that she thought would be perfect for me.
It’s a gadget that helps you remember your personal identification numbers (or PINs). For a laughable £29.95, you will receive a pocket calculator type thingy, on which each key has the clear image of a different bank or credit card. So, you click on the symbol of your choice, type in the relevant PIN for your card or bank, and bingo, the thingy remembers it.
Of course, if your attention hasn’t drifted away, you might sensibly ask what would happen if this wonderful thingy were lost or stolen. Stacked with all your PINS, a potential thief would have access to every penny you have in the world, and be sailing in the owner’s suite on the Queen Mary 2 with his new Latvian bride before you knew the bugger was even missing.
Please. Do you think for one moment these clever people haven’t thought of that eventuality? The gadget is protected by a PIN……..Which you have to remember ………… good grief
Heidi and I have therefore decided not to send each other gifts this year and instead she wants to give the money we would have spent to charity………….and that’s fine with me….except……..and she will kill me for telling you this………we have been having a heated discussion today about which charity to give it to.
Heidi has been sponsoring a child in Africa for the last few years. She sends money every month to a charity that spends it on clean water, education and medicine……and I think this is absolutely brilliant. I meanwhile have always taken a policy of self-denial at Christmas and given money to the Salvation Army. However………Heidi received a brochure suggesting we should buy presents for random families in Africa. All you do is make a donation to Oxfam and it will send a gift down the chimney of a house in Mozambique.
You may think this is all jolly noble, and I’d have to agree if the presents were iPods or Miami Heat shirts or something the average African child might actually want.
But unfortunately we are talking about goats. Hundreds of them. Oxfam says this is a brilliant idea, and the brochure posts a quote from Elias Nadeba Silva, a farmer, who was given one last year. “I have great plans for my field,” he said, “and my family is very grateful for Oxfam’s help….But next year, no more goats, Okay? I’d prefer a laptop computer.”
Other popular choices from the brochure include cans of worms, piles of dung, catering packs of condoms and the materials for making toilets. Who wants that for Christmas? “Daddy, Daddy. Santa’s been! He’s been! And he’s brought me . . . a toilet.”
I can only begin to imagine the look of desperation on the little lad’s face. His big brown eyes full of overwhelming disappointment. Think about it. We’re told that we should never buy our wives or girlfriends anything with a plug, because this is bound to be something they need, rather than want. And exactly the same thing holds true the world over. No child anywhere wants a lavatory for Christmas. You need a lavatory. You want teddies and footballs and Eye Pods.
However……it will come as no surprise that I lost this particular argument and therefore today Heidi bought me a toilet and I bought her one as well…….and I guess thinking about it……..it’s probably going to be a very useful gift. Here’s the link if you would like to see what we bought.
http://www.oxfam.org.uk/shop/ProductDetails.aspx?catalog=Unwrapped&product=OU3114WS
I feel pretty good about buying two of these ………but I bet you they would have preferred a new pair of Nikes.
Goodnight
Your friends
John, Heidi and the Thingy
Filed under: Bloggers Cruise, Travel
Think double stick tape or those hooks that you peel the paper off of thay stick to the wall and hold up to 10 pounds.
Pero John….. what a mess!! I believe you because my father is like you. He wouldn’t even change a light bulb. My mother has to do everything, hang pictures and everything but he was always an excellent dad and a faithful husband so it was ok. So now the blog is for complaints? ummmmm
When did it change? So you are still John Almighty on vacation. I had complaints also this week, a mom insulted me and everything. Not an easy week for us. Since Tuesday it has been chaos. Cristian is going crazy with all the work the teachers have given him. It makes me sad to see him. No weekend for us. 7 more days for him at school. Hi Heidi!!
Love;
Nanni
John,
giving a child the gift of a toilet warms the cockles of me heart
Looking forward to seeing you & Mrs S Nob together, hope all goes well
Have you considered approaching a well known brand of hemorrhoid cream to sponsor not only this blog but all your charitable endeavors??????
XXXXX to Heidi, Bump & You
Please John don’t stop waisting my time with your blog thingy. I love reading what you write and it makes this old woman laugh.
Give Heidi my best and by the way if you didn’t have a toilet you would very much appreciate one.
I will see you in February ! hope you and Heidi have a wonderful Winterval!!
John:
If you place tape in the form of an X (with the intention that the nail goes in where the x crosses)
it will help prevent plaster from shattering and cracking.
NO….never stop your wonderful comedy blog.
There is a place for complaints…it is called Guest Relations. And while you are kind enough to forward suggestions and help when you can, the main purpose of this blog is to ENTERTAIN!!
Always has been and always will be…woo hoo!!!
Our BEST Get Well wishes go to Stephanie!!!
Hope she is back soon at full strength!!
We have an orphanage in Mexico that we have sponsored for years. It was started by a dear couple who went to church with us. They both gave up brilliant careers at Federal Express years ago to follow their hearts. They are about 3 – 4 hours from the Mexican border.
They are completely independent financially and do a wonderful job. All proceeds go to the needs and care of the children. No corporate boards or administrative fees skimming funds off the top.
They do have a board of directors, but all of them are strickly on a volunteer basis and have to pay for all their own expenses when taking care of the Home’s business.
We are excited about the fuel surcharge. More money to spend on Cosmos!!!!
We are calling our Fantasy B2B cruise in January at “Bloggers Inspection Cruise”. We just want to make sure the Fantasy is perfect when you arrive in February!!!
Linda (Mom of your friend DJ)
Bob in CT
Don’t tell John about the lick-um stick-ums or the peel and stick wall hooks. Let him call his dad or keep a handy man busy. John sounds just like my brother. His wife had to do everything. Somebody should send John all the episods of “Tim Taylor the Tool Man”.
John, you should send those toilets to your friend Al Ernst he could use them.
BIG ED
The BOY or GIRL poll on my blog now stands at
43% BOY
57% GIRL
Cast your vote at
http://ekonefe.wordpress.com/open-poll-page/
BIG ED
Hi John/Heidi:
Happy Winterval to you as well.
Sorry about all the tech problems.
I got to go to the dentist and their technology had some problems with the equipment. Whatever happened to the ’scrape and go’?
Good luck getting your wall repaired and pictures hung correctly.
Good idea with the toilet.
Take care!
David
Egad! Since when did this blog become bytch at John or send in your gripes? Not so much….
If that is indeed the case what am I doing here?
Oh yah…Court Jester….
Once upon a time my dad and I were up in the attic when I was but a young whipper-snapper. It was (and still is a dusty area filled with junk with large amount of insulation strewn about. My overly cautious mom downstairs stood below begging me to be careful and not to step ANYWHERE but on the ceiling joists since apparently my dad found out the hard way that by stepping between them put his foot through the ceiling…. Lesson learned by proxy….
bright idea…..covering the joists with simple plywood sheets would prevent such an occurrence.
I like the fact the the loo you’ve described comes with a free DVD, gift box and chocolates.
The Flying (joists …rafters …..and oh yeah… buttresses) Dutchman
Dear John never ever try to undertake anything to fix around the house unless your Bob Vila.Save yourself the agony and embarrassment.Hire it done let them take the blame.Sure it may cost more but in the end you look like a hero instead of a zero. Best wishes to Heidi and the Thingy
prince charlie can’t do that house stuff either. but don’t worry, just so you know WHO to call to do it. that’s what he tells me anyway.
smiles, bonnie and prince charlie
Some of us have the talent and some of us don’t.
Unfortunately, I am in the not category – but Kathy is in the have category.
Call the expert – Heidi probably has all the skill in the family.
Jon
We or should I say, I recently did some painting in our home. I patched the holes from nails and did the painting. When it was time to rehang the pictures…my husband…well…it looked a whole lot like what you described. Heidi, you are not alone! John, you are not the only man in the world who cannot hang a picture. But did you know? You can find instructions on the internet for how to do ANYTHING! So, yep, hubby went and found instructions and all my pictures are now hung. Most of them are where I wanted them!
Have fun doing the Thingy’s room! Such a wonderful time!
Hugs to Heidi!
Karen
OMG you make me laugh–this actually happened to my son in law as he was remodeling the bathroom in their home–himself. He fell through the ceiling–not once but twice on two different occasions! Eight months later the bathroom is finally finished but the patches to the ceiling in the den which is directly below the bathroom still need professional work. Tinky winky, Dipsy, Lala and Po–is Nu-Nu in the picture too? I can remember when the oldest grandchild loved the Teletubbies and her dad found the dolls online in the UK.
It seems many of us had the same thoughts this Christmas oops Winterval. We have adopted a needy family instead of exchanging gifts at the office and I have to say it was great fun shopping for children that wouldn’t have a Christmas if we didn’t do it. It makes you want to do more–a very contageous feeling which is good for all of us. I had to laugh at you however about the guy with the goats–I receive that catalog where you can send these animals to these underdeveloped countries but each year I always wondered who would deliver it and how would it get to whoever it was that needed it?
Thanks always for your humor. Glad to hear you checked on Steph and she is recovering nicely. We miss her and I miss Jaime’s Dear John letters as well. I hope she is enjoying her time at home with her family–if you hear from her, tell her we miss her!
Cheryl
I totally disagree with the comment about nixing the comedy part of the blog. The mixture of laughs, news and responses is just fine. Keep up the good work. Great news that we will have a $300 credit on our CHRISTMAS cruise in 2 weeks! My solution to hating Christmas shopping is to plan a family cruise at this time of year. No other shopping required.
hello john & family
hope you enjoy your new out houses,
and a very very MERRY CHRISTMAS to
you and your family.
when we go shopping if the store dont say
MERRY CHRISTMAS then we dont buy .
they call a CHRISTMAS TREE a
holiday tree NOT,,,,,,,,,
cant wait til NOLA ,,,see you then,,and we got you a CHRISTMAS gift, an will bring it to the FANTASY on feb 7th 2009.
GOD SPEED
your freinds from sunny florida
tom & jane
John, I’m amused that your “build a bog” is listed in the DIY section of the website. You don’t have to go to Africa and assemble it, do you?
Congrats on hearing the baby’s heartbeat yesterday – how exciting!! I hope Heidi is feeling better now that she’s in the second trimester!
Ok, maybe it’s just me but did you notice how in addition to the loo, “This gift comes with a free DVD, gift box and chocolates.”. They do not have a loo, but they have a DVD player (and of course the accompanying “digital” TV).
And I’m sorry – lumping all holidays together? There are very distinct meanings behind each of them therefore warranting their individual day in the spotlight. Christmas is my holiday but I certainly don’t begrudge others of enjoying and celebrating the holidays of their choice! Isn’t that what “free world” is about?
So glad to hear that Heidi and “Thingy” are doing so well. The heartbeat sure is something else. Makes the whole concept very real and is a sound that you’ll never forget! First of many very special memories to come! Enjoy!
Cheers!
Hi John, (Please Reply)
I expect that the gifts will be well received. And that’s the “botton line”.
After all, have you ever been in a toilet at a roadside rest stop in France ? I could not believe my eyes.
I was hysterical at the button to select for “wedding”. Is that for a wish list ?
Bill
JOhn..thanks to Carnival for the great Christmas gift of removing the fuel charge. Was that one of the “For the fun of it?’ You could give me husband competition. He hung the Christmas lights and was so proud of himself that it was so easy and then……………discovered he had the wrong end left at the end of the cord and couldn’t plug it in. Hope it’s okay that I used the “C” word,but can’t take it out of my vocabulary. Won’t it be fun next year to celebrate the holidays with your new bundle of joy?Regards from the Beast….
John,
We’ve been going through the same thing in this country for the past few years. There are those bitter politically correct loons among us who are trying their hardest to remove the word Christmas from everything, and little by little they seem to be winning the war. About the only store left that will let its employees say Christmas anymore is Wal Mart. At least Bill O’Reilly is fighting the good fight for Christmas over here.
Jeff
Hello, John (please reply),
I know you are very busy, but I was curious as to whether or not Wee Jimmy had responded with any suggestions for romantic excursions on our anniversary/second honeymoon cruise on the Conquest 12/14? I really didn’t want to bother you again, but we leave in just over a week, and I am planning to let my husband know about this surprise second honeymoon at a special dinner next Wednesday, and would like to be able to include our excursions on his card as well. I completely understand if you cannot get this info for me, after all, you have plenty on your plate with little Thingy on the way! Thanks for all you do! Sharon
Hi John & Heidi,
First, thank you for the “Winterval” card. And my best wishes again to you and your families.
I’m glad Stephanie is doing well and hope will be back with us soon.
John, I feel your pain. I am totally not handy around the house. I have to call our building maintenance (or my nephew) anytime I need something to be done – change lightbulb in a ceiling fixture, put together a vacuum, install a new tv, change the battery in my ceiling smoke detector. At least I can change the battery in the carbon monoxide detector – that’s lower on the wall. John, you should have one of these too. I think there are combination smoke/co2 detectors. It’s a law in NYC that both be in every apartment. I am totally maintenance-challenged. At least I can do my own laundry!
That’s good to know about the fuel surcharge. Gas in my neighborhood is about $2.11/gallon – over $2.50 less than it was about 6 months ago. Hopefully it will go even lower. If only other prices would get lower – I can dream, can’t I?
Have a great weekend to all,
Hugs,
Carol
John;
Thanks for the early Christmas present info from Carnival Corp. As I sail on Jan 24th on the Miracle that is good news indeed. We all understood and supported the surcharge as fuel prices surged, but as it turned out it was a spike and not a trend, Carnival did the right thing buy there customers in removing it now.
Also, don’t change the blog, that’s what you do…. It is what we all love and look forward to reading every day. It is above your call of duty that you offer to help them but they should always talk to there TA, PVP or call Carnival support line with there issues first.
Our thoughts and best wishes for a speedy recovery for Stephanie. And of course good health for Heidi and Desk.
Keith
Please don’t turn the blog into a complaint desk. It’s generous of you to offer to represent Carnival in answering questions and connecting people to the right department, but this is not the Ombudsman blog. It’s for entertainment and interesting info about cruising. People with concerns should go straight to someone who can fix the concern.
Thank you for updating us on Stephanie – hope she’s feeling well. Thanks to Tony and everyone making the blog happen!
Hey, John,
Must be new readers who think this blog is a “help desk.” I’ve been reading since almost the beginning (did go back and read those early ones, as well), and I always have considered your posts to be more or less a day in your life. Granted, it was mostly about onboard experiences, but it’s still your humor I keep coming back for. I just thought it was generous of you to offer your assistance when people seemed unable to get “help” through normal channels…like customer service, etc. Didn’t see it as you taking on total responsiblity for solving everyones’ problems. Anyway, just please keep doing what you do and don’t let the turkeys get you down!
Today’s post is by far one of the funniest yet. I could see you standing in Thingy Desk’s room with the plaster dust raining down as Heidi glared at you from the room on the other side of the now missing wall!!! All the DIY stuff is hilarious.
My two cents on the holiday issue…it’s Christmas and no one is going to make me call it anything else. Like Tom and Jane who also live in Florida, I try to avoid stores who refuse to “advertise” Christmas gifts, trees, decorations, etc. You know there’s a saying something like “If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.” I believe that if people around the world don’t start speaking out in defense of all we hold dear, the liberals (for want of anything else to call them) are going to make the world so politically correct, we who care will be afraid to leave our homes lest we say the wrong thing and are jailed or exterminated on the spot.
And speaking of standing for something, I read an article this morning about how much President Bush has more than doubled U.S. aid to Africa, especially in the fight against AIDS and malaria, and how African leaders have praised him, yet the Hollywood types who claim to care about the suffering people refuse to acknowledge how much he has done. The article went on to surmise that eventually, our new President elect will be cannonized (or at least awarded a Nobel) for what President Bush has actually accomplished. The news media (joke) in this country has become our worst enemy!
Sorry…got carried away again. I just get so frustrated sometimes!!! (And you started it.)
Okay, so good choices for Christmas presents. And you know what? If you and Heidi are anything like Scott and me, you need nothing, want nothing and have no room to put anything more, so why not give to someone who does have more need than want?!? Hopefully, you’ll start, or help to spread, a trend.
Soooo….Merry Christmas to you, Heidi, Thingy Desk, Stephanie (glad to hear she’s doing well), Dad and Mum, Suze and family, Alan and family, Mr. S.nob, and anyone else I’ve forgotten, and all my blogger family,
Your Pal, Myra
Since when is a private blog a company complaint dept.? I think you already do more than enough to help people. Don’t change your blog.
I wish my husband would just call someone instead of trying DIY!
KathyG
John,
Forgot to say “Thanks to Carnival for removing the fuel surcharge.” It would be wonderful if other corporations would follow their lead and reduce the cost of their products by the amount they have increased them to compensate for the price of oil. One can dream.
Your Pal, Myra
You ignored the first rule of DIY. DON’T do it !!!
As for the tv must be like being back on the splendor on the first cruise. Try hitting it if that doesn’t work a large whisky will solve both problems. Mike
Hello John & Heidi,
John, I agree with all the other comments that you should not change the blog. The funny commentary is what we love about it! You often handling complaints is because you are a nice person, who genuinely wants everyone who takes a Carnival cruise to have the best possible experience. We all love the blog just the way it is!
Best wishes to Stephanie. Please get well soon. Tony, thank you for stepping in. Heidi, the pictures of you look beautiful (of course). John, the story about hanging the picture was hilarious! My husband has always tuned a deaf ear whenever I ask him to hang anything up. Perhaps this is why.
Looking forward to the Feb. Bloggers’ Cruise,
Cheryl D.
Hi John! Hope you and Heidi enjoy this blessed Christmas season no matter what the silly committee has decided to call it.
Just think, next year you will have a new little blessing to share Christmas with! How very exciting for both of you! I love your wit and zest for life that you display on your blog…Please keep it up. People have many channels to go through if they have problems. This blog need not be one of them. Love to you and yours ….Can’t wait to see you on Bloggers in February!
Jennifer
John,
Now that you purchased the toilets, who will supply the toilet paper?
Keep up the humerous jottings.
Jim
John, thanks for another wonderful blog!
1st, I am also electronically challenged, so you’re in good company.
2nd, Merry Christmas! As a Christian, it is Christmas, and always will be!
3rd, now for my gripe! How can readers DARE to tell you what you should and should not write in YOUR blog!!! I suppose they mean it as “constructive criticism” but this is your blog. When they write their own blog, they can put whatever they want in it.
Anyway, that’s my 2 cents worth for the day. =)
Counting down the days until the Blogger’s cruise!
Hi John,
Thanks for the laugh out loud moment!
And thanks for the Oxfam gift ideas. I am sending Donkeys and Fish to all the people I play poker with.
One other thank you I owe you. Thank you for help making our first cruise in Feb 08 on Freedom the best ever.
Doug
Yes, John, there is a CHRISTMAS time!!!! WOO HOO!!!!
And CARNIVAL has given us their present already!!! What a gift to get lower prices!!! No fuel charges…
THANK YOU CARNIVAL!!! THANK YOU!!!!
Heidi, Congrats on the EXCELLENT Doctor’s visit!!! You’re a GREAT mom!!!!
And HOORAY for Stephanie!!! I’m so happy to hear that your healing is going well!!! THANK YOU Tony for keeping us going in her absense!!!!
Bless you all!!!
Lambie