I am such a huge Queen Mary 2 size idiot………I missed Mother’s Day……….I missed not only wishing my Mum, the woman that brought me up and gave me her sense of humour a happy Mother’s Day but I missed Heidi’s first as a Mum……..and that makes me a total and utter bastard in my eyes.
In the UK and Europe Mothers Day is always on the second Sunday in March and even though it’s different here in the States and Canada that is no excuse……..I missed it.
Both Heidi and my Mum received no cards or flowers or even best wishes on the phone ………….they received bugger all. OK, both ladies said they understood and it was really no big deal…………but…………..to me it was.
It’s hard to think you are a good husband when you do things like this. I always battle with myself every day I am away from the family and have to remember that I am doing what I think I was born to do and am doing it to support them. Let’s face it, I am no good at anything else and unless a chain of strip clubs opens aimed at the female market who love overweight ugly men with a bent tooth gyrating on a stage dressed only in thong …….. cruise directing is all I have. Many people ask me if I would ever work in the office in Miami. Well, I am sure that if I begged enough they would find me something but I would be useless to them and like a caged lion sitting in a cubicle……….OK, maybe like a caged skunk more than a lion then.
I wish Heidi and Kye could spend more time with me now but not only is the flight so long but the cabin is too small. I mean it’s big enough (just) for me but for the three of us ……….it would be like getting me into a pair of underpants without the letter “x” on the label. So I am buggered. I was handling it well up until I realized I had forgotten Mother’s Day…….well……all except the coming home to an empty cabin…………I truly despise that.
I have tried to be a good husband. I have come to accept that in any dispute I have with Heidi that I am wrong. I suggest all me except this not simply because your life will be so, so much easier if you do. It is also because, in almost all circumstances, you are genuinely wrong. Her way of stacking the dishwasher is more logical. Watching reruns of The West Wing isn’t more important than watching re-runs of Sex and the City. And nothing can be gained from leaving a yellow stain on the toilet seat.
But men………..remember……..even though you are wrong about absolutely everything, you must still put up a bit of a fight. If she thinks you are agreeing to everything simply to make your life easier, it won’t make your life easier. She will know and then your life will become as hellish as dropping the soap in a Turkish prison.
Oh yes………talking is important. Talking and listening. I know it can be excruciating, but wives need conversation. They cannot exist on grunts alone. You must save that for when you are with your mates watching sports on TV. If you don’t, you will be nagged. And nagging, as we all know, is the marital equivalent of water boarding.
Your computer is not more important than your wife.
Your Raspberry isn’t, either.
On the specific point of housework, there are two things you must accept. First, you have to do some. Second, you can nab all the decent chores (putting out the trash, unloading the dishwasher, cleaning the car) and avoid all the horrid ones pairing socks, loading the dishwasher, vacuuming, cleaning the yellow stain of the toilet seat……… be proactive.
And finally, always remember you were lucky enough for your true love to agree to spend the rest of her life with you, in sickness, health and toleration of all your stupid blokey habits. Do everything you can to keep her, because she has been kind enough to keep you………..but don’t forget Mother’s Day especially the first one after the birth of your first child. Otherwise not only will you be in the doghouse……………….you will feel totally and utterly ashamed of yourself……….like I do.
Time for today’s questions.
Mike & Ronda Long Asked:
**John, please reply**Hi John, what a surprise to us to be the subject of your blog!! Truly, it was an honor to meet and speak with you; the highlight of our cruise. We love your sense of humor!
We were glad to learn Kye and Heidi arrived safely and it was wonderful when you showed Kye’s picture on your Afternoon Show. As I mentioned to you, sometimes parents don’t fully appreciate the healthy children they are given. I know you and Heidi enjoy every moment with Kye, and that’s a wonderful thing.
We mentioned that we knew from Rachel’s birth her lifespan would be short. We were blessed to have her with us for nearly 4 years and she taught us so much, most of all – true unconditional love. Although her genetic condition (COFS syndrome) created multiple challenges, she lived every moment as fully as possible.
Now on to the beautiful Carnival Dream…….we had a blast! One of our biggest comments would be didn’t notice any cigarette smoke odor at any time. The ship is more beautiful than all of the photos posted on the blog; she really has to be seen in person.
Thanks again for all of your kindness. You are a very special person!
Mike & RondaJohn Says:
Hello Mike and RhondaI am sure I speak for everyone when I say once again how sorry I was to learn of your daughter’s passing. The love you had for her and the love you still have for her now is extraordinary and it was a true honour to listen to your stories of your beautiful child. Thank you for sharing those moments and for your kind words about your Carnival Dream.
I hope we see each other again soon.
Best wishes to you all
JohnSabrina Asked:
John – please reply -Hello! First off, our family loves to cruise with Carnival. Secondly, I’m not sure if you are still interested in this as it was in a thread that was a few months old, one of our children has been diagnosed with autism. He is 3 and has been on 2 previous Carnival cruises. He did quite well at Camp Carnival. We are actually seeing improvements every day. It’s wonderful.
I emailed the special needs department and they did reply stating to head to the Special Assistance desk for embarkation and then see the purser’s desk for debarkation instructions. I have no idea what, if anything, they are going to do, but I am very pleased that we may receive a little help while boarding.
Aidan is great, but very impatient. The kid will screech at a decibel level that shatters eardrums when he feels he was waited long enough… 35-40 seconds would be his idea of waiting LOL
Anyway, the thread requested that we contact you via your blog, put John -please reply- and the following info:
Thank you so much for all you do to make Carnival cruises an amazing vacation experience for our family. Our kids literally love cruising with Carnival more than they love Disneyworld. I found that out after I spent about $5000 to take them to that horrid and crowded place.
Sabrina
John Says:
Hello SabrinaI know you are on the ship right now and I am sure things are going well. I sent Aidan a gift which I hope he enjoys and please let me know how things went and if you feel there are any ways in which we can improve in our care of looking after Aidan and others like him.
I hope you are having a fantastic time.
Best wishes to all
JohnAlan Tomasko Asked:
Dear John (Please Reply)I have been reading your blog for almost a year now and find it funny and addictive. We will finally have the honour (spelled correctly) of sailing with you again on the Dream March 6th. This will be are ninth Carnival Cruise and will be taking our two teenage daughters (their 3rd time cruising). Hopefully you can answer this and settle argument between the wife and myself as to when was the last time you were are CD. She says it was the Fascination April 1996 and I say it was on the Sensation March 1994 this cruise you might remember, I know it seems like ages ago, but there was a large drag queen named Mary chasing you around the ship and we had engine problems that canceled our stop in Jamaica and the ship had to rescue a group of Cubans floating out in the Gulf of Mexico. Does any of this ring a bell?
Also, if this submission is not too late would it be possible for you to work your magic and possibly be able to arrange it that we are seated at a large table. We so enjoy interacting with others at dinner verses being put into a booth for the four of us. We have late seating and our cabin is 2254. Needed to check out the new cove balconies.
See you soon.
Alan TomaskoJohn Says:
Hello AlanThanks for the kind words about the blog and I hope it continues to bring you a smile or two. I know you just got off the ship and I wanted to make sure you were
OK with the table assignment and that you all had fun. This is one of those questions that got away from me and as the readership of the blog thingy increases so does the number of questions and I apologize to you and everyone else if I am late in my replies. Please let me know if you had fun and I send my best wishes to you and the family.
John
joe mcdonald Asked:
Dear john, (not the best way to start a letter on valentine’s day).I would like to know if you can give me a little information on the procedure involved in the production of the legends show. I will be on the dream the week of 3/27, and I am interested in signing up for the show. I know the last cruise I was on last year one impersonator they were looking for was Garth brooks. I would like to know if they are looking for the same cast of characters on each cruise or does it change? I do a mean Garth brooks. I know auditions take place a karoake, but how does it work for the main show? Do you sing with the band or is it karaoke style as well, where you have the words prompted in front of you? Look forward to hearing from you.
John Says:
Hello JoeCarnival Legends continues to be very popular and we will indeed be having the show on Friday night here on your Carnival Dream. The characters are at present:
James Brown
Aretha Franklin
Sir Elton John
Madonna
Britney Spears………….Legend my arse
Madonna
Garth Brooks
Gloria Estefan
Elvis
Frank Sinatra
These legends may not be around much longer though as we are going to be replacing some of them soon and I will have more details on that as soon as it happens. Meanwhile, auditions will be listed in your Capers and unless Todd changes …………. bugger ………. auditions will be listed in your Fun Times and unless Todd changes anything they are held on Tuesday nights at 10:30pm in the Burgundy Lounge. The show is performed with the cast of dancers, singers and the orchestra and I hope you get a chance to perform. You will love the experience for sure.
Wishing you the best of luck and a great cruise
JohnJane Schneider Asked:
John,so happy Carnival is going back to Europe! Can you tell me if you will be the Cruise Director on the Dream when it sails in Oct?
You were the Cruise Director when we sailed to Europe on the Splendor, and we remember you fondly. Hoping you will be there. Planning on booking this amazing itinerary in the next few weeks.
Hoping to see you.
Jane and Eric SchneiderJohn Says:
Hello Jane ScneiderI love Europe and I have made no secret in telling everyone how excited I am about the Carnival Magic returning there in 2011. I will be the CD on the Carnival Magic but on your Carnival Dream in October. That privilege will go to Carnival’s best CD Todd Wittmer whom I know you will love.
I hope though to see you both in Europe again and thanks for all the kind words.
Best wishes to you both
JohnLarry Asked:
Hello John, Reply if you feel the need.Just wanted to let you know that we enjoyed our cruise on the Triumph (Jan 31-Feb 6) out of New Orleans, the ship was fantastic and loved the lay out, however I am a little disappointed that the ” little something” that you were going to have sent to our cabin for the wife ( who put up with me for 20 years) never arrived, this is however not a complaint just wanted to let you know in case there was a mix up or it went to one of the newlywed couples that we saw board the ship and never saw again till we debarked lol ( they did look a little wore out but ALL SMILES) there was one thing that we did notice and it was a first, we could never get to the rio lounge, or several other clubs due to the number of ” special group” meetings, there was the Baptist singers group, a swing dance group and several other groups on the cruise with us. I hate to admit it but we became a little bored, we went to the shows but the mood on the ship seemed very sedate even the CD ( while very funny) was somewhat tame, the weather while cold leaving port and most of the next day was fine and the seas were smooth the deck seemed almost empty and no events, we did see several crew members escorting the groups from one area to another, heck even the art auction had to be held in the disco (give them kudos for that they did a great job), I know that you love a good cigar and I can tolerate a ” good cigar” unfortunately the man in the cabin next to us wouldn’t have known a good cigar from a large turd lol, he was out there morning noon and night with one lit up it smelled so rank that we couldn’t even go out on the balcony, we made several loud comments and coughed a lot but I swear he would take another big drag and blow it around the partition then cough that disgusting bad lungs cough, well he had a lot of class, it may have been low class but it was class, lol. Anyway, is there some way that arrangements for large groups can be made that don’t tie up the entire crew and lounges, I understand that they pay a good price for the enjoyment of being on these fantastic ships but what about the rest of us. We will be booking another cruise in the near future (and another, and another and another, etc….) but this one was somewhat of a disappointment. Hope to see you onboard next time. Btw our cabin was 7377.
John Says:
Hello LarryI am so very upset that you did not receive your gift. This is the second time a certain person has let me down and I am not happy about that at all. I am so very sorry and I promise I will make up for it next time you come and cruise with us.
What the heck was your cabin neighbor smoking that would give him such an awful cough? What a shame and I am so sorry that you had to endure that. Group business is very important to every cruise line and each of us is trying to attract more and more. However, one of the concerns with this is just as you mentioned the fact that they can take away the ship’s lounges for meetings and events etc. I am going to send this to the CD of the Carnival Triumph and I am sure he will be disappointed at your comments about being bored as I am about you not receiving your gift.
Thanks for the review and please let me know the next time you book a cruise with us and I will make up for what did not get done this time.
Best wishes to all
JohnLeslie Asked:
Dear John: Please reply.I remembered George’s (the assistant maitre d’ on the Jubilee and Celebration) last name. It is Hondromohalis or Hondomohalis. Also I thought up a rather interesting name (in my opinion) for the new Carnival ship that is being built or will be built. I’d like to see it called Peace. Since Carnival is the biggest cruise line with their encompassing Holland America, Princess, Seabourn, Cunard, and Costa under their umbrella I thought the name Peace would be rather appropriate. Here is Carnival’s chance to make a big statement to the world by promoting “Peace”. Hope your visit with your girls is going well and that Kye is enjoying being on a very big “boat”. Best regards, Leslie
John Says:
Hello LeslieYou are of course talking about George the Greek one of our long standing crew members and one of the most fun personalities we have ever had. George is currently on the Carnival Inspiration and continues to be one of our very best Maitre D’s. It has been too long since I have worked with him.
The name “Peace” is a wonderful suggestion although I doubt the marketing beardies will see it as a good name for a fun for all ship. Your sentiment though is spot on and peace is certainly something we all hope for.
Thanks for the kind words and I did indeed have a wonderful time with Heidi and Kye
Best wishes
JohnSandra Moran Asked:
Question, not a complaint, we did the Mexican Riviera Jan 17, 2010 on the Splendor. Over all it was nice (we would be double Platinum if you had one over 20 cruises) we love Carnival. I can see some of the cutbacks due to the economy but accept these are necessary, but a question. Why is the non smoking slot machine area on that ship (or any other ship) right next to a very smoky bar, I can honestly say that it saved us (6 in our party) a ton of money. Not real smart placement and the smokers don’t care and neither does the staff. Smokers sit there any way. (Only 8 to 10 machines) A different location would help Carnival get more of our gambling money (perhaps Air cleaners???) who knows. It’s OK as I can get to Las Vegas in 4 to 6 hours and can leave it there instead. Not angry or upset just giving you guys food for thought. We have seen Carnival fix many problems in the past. This could use some attention. We hope to continue to vacation on Carnival and look forward to appreciating all of the effort all of you put into making us feel at home. We love your employees
respectfullySandra and Dennis Moran
John Says:
Hello Sandra MoranThis is an excellent point and one that is best answered by sharing with you the fact that the trial to have a mostly non smoking casino here on your Carnival Dream has been a huge success. I think this may be the way forward and I will certainly be sending in your comments as proof to this to the folks at the top. Thank you for writing. Constructive criticism is what will keep us at the top of the cruise industry. Let’s see what happens with casino smoking in the near future.
Thank you for your loyalty.
Best wishes to all
JohnClaire Potter Asked:
John, please replyI have not been on a cruise but a friend of mine who has put me in touch with your blog because they thought I could help you
I know you make jokes about your weight but I do suggest you stop and take it more seriously. You will feel better if you really start to shed the pounds and you will look better as well. I am sure Carnival would like you to be healthy and look good on the shows, right?
If you need help and advice I can give it to you and show you how to shed 30 pounds in just 6 weeks. I work with Herbal Life products and they are going to work for you I promise. You have my e mail address so use it please and save yourself.
Claire Potter
John Says:
Hello Claire PotterI am not sure how to reply to this except to say I am trying to lose weight and do it my way. I also have to say that it’s a shame that your care for me is hidden behind your wanting to sell me some tea.
I won’t be e-mailing you Claire but send you my best wishes.
JohnIrene Garner Asked:
Dear John…..please replyI just wanted to write to you to let you know that we (my grandson Mackenzie and I) had a wonderful time aboard the Carnival Dream last week. It is a beautiful ship, and as always, the service, the dining, the excursions, the staff and crew all exceeded our expectations. I think embarkation was the fastest we have experienced too. We were picked up at our hotel earlier than we expected, and we were enjoying lunch on the lido deck by midday.
It was a real pleasure to meet you and all the entertainment was top class, especially the new show “Dancing in the Streets”. At no time did we wait in line for more than a few minutes for any of our meals, either on the lido deck or for the “Any time dining”. In fact I enjoyed that more than the set dining times and we were able to meet new friends every night. Your entertainment staff is the best, and helped make our vacation even more special.
I have no criticisms about the ship but I do have a question. I was wondering why there is no adults-only swimming pool on the Carnival Dream. I know there is the Serenity deck, but there are only hot tubs there. The pool at the back of the ship on the Sunset deck would be the perfect place as it is smaller than and not as loud as being by the lido deck pool. I was at the pool at the rear of the ship on the last sea day and there were eight children having a wonderful time jumping in and out of the pool, but I wouldn’t have wanted to go near them. There were only 300+ children on the ship last week, but this week when there are over 1,300 children, the adults won’t be able to get near any pool. The kids have the water park and slides too, so it would be nice to have something just for the adults.
BTW, what happened to the showing of the Olympic Games opening ceremonies? I thought we’d get to see them after the Super Bowl fans getting to see their game. Thank goodness I recorded it so I can watch it here at home.
Anyway, back to reality.Thanks again for a wonderful vacation…..Irene Garner (Hooked on cruising) and Mackenzie (the wave)
John Says:
Hello Irene GarnerThanks for the kind words and that great review of your Carnival Dream cruise. I am so glad you liked the entertainment and certainly the Dancin in the Street show is one that everyone is talking about. The company is a family oriented one and that’s why we don’t have an adults only pool. We do as you mentioned have an adult only whirlpools but we don’t feel that we need to have a pool just for adults. Maybe though it is something we need to look at. I am glad you had a goodtime. I showed a lot of the Olympic coverage on the big screen but the opening ceremony was on at a time that conflicted with other deck events and music. It was a fabulous Olympics though and Canada should be proud.
I hope it isn’t long before we see you again.
Best wishes
JohnEduardo Peraza Asked:
Dear john,I have a huge favor to ask you and understand if you decline- Me and my family will be taking a cruise on the carnival liberty on march 27th and this will be my last cruise in a while with them because I will be turning 18 and joining the military…. so here comes the favor- being 17 at the moment and not owning a credit card, it is very difficult to buy a gift on carnivals website for my parents to thank them for the 7 or 8 cruises (I lost count) they’ve taken me on, so would you be able to pull some strings for me and make it so that there is a little present in their room when we board the carnival liberty? If you can’t I understand Love the blogs, keep them coming!
John Says:
Hello EduardoConsider it done mate. I will ask the CD Noonan to do this for me. We all wish you the best in your military career and have a great cruise.
That’s all for today. I will be back with more tomorrow. Actually I should apologize to Claire Potter. My answer was rude and flippant and I am sorry about that. I am having a bad day and took my problems out on you…………please forgive me.
You may have heard some screaming where you live last night and if you did it came from your Carnival Dream. No, someone didn’t walk past my cabin window and see me naked, bending over to get something out of the refrigerator……..nope………these were not screams of terror but screams of absolute joy. Here’s why.
From: DREAM CASINO
Subject: Casino Winner – $23,957.85Hi John,
As you were already informed we have a big winner in the Casino today!
The name of the player is Mrs. ___________ and she won the amount of $23,957.85 on a penny machine.
Thank you,
Claudia
Yes, you read that right. She won $23,957.85 on a penny machine. By the way, Sandra is on her first cruise and traveling with her husband Peter celebrating their 49th wedding anniversary.
Now, let’s go to the Carnival Valor and read a comment card sent to me by Big Tex the superb cruise director…………….and yes………..this is real.
Yep, we are now so desperate for your money that we have resorted to the same tactics that members of the A Team used to get BA to fly. Those aren’t chocolate mints we are putting on your pillow at night………..it’s a drug that makes you lose all your money in the casino……………it’s called Loseitol. Side effects may include explosive diarrhea and writing a load of bollocks on comment cards.
I did want to show you this letter from a 12-year-old girl called Natalie, just because ……… well……it just tickled me that she would write this about her parents and how she describes them as the best .
Time for today’s photos which are as usual very, very random.
So here we are in St. Thomas and the sun shines down on us and the other ships in port. There are a total of 16,000 cruise ship passengers here again and I have learned over the last few weeks that it is absolutely vital that I tell our guests to allow extra time to return to the ship. For example, it takes about 15 minutes to get downtown in St. Thomas from your Carnival Dream.
However, as most of the ships leave port at roughly the same time, most guests tend to come back at the peak time of 4 pm. I therefore ask our guests to allow 45 minutes to get back to the ship from the madhouse that is downtown St. Thomas. It is even worse in St. Maarten. You see in St. Thomas the Monster Mall of the Seas docks over the hill at what is known as the Submarine Pier so at least their guests go in a different direction to the other three ships docked at Havenside.
But in St. Maarten, the Monster is docked next to us along with the beautiful Emerald Princess and three other ships. Thus, all the guests come back to the same area ………at the same time. There is no hiding from the fact that it is very busy and the lines for the water taxis and taxis are long………….patience is needed for sure.
Excursions this week are mostly all sold out, especially the beach tours. That’s because of course we have lots of children here and Mum and Dad know that to keep the kids happy you need sand, sea and sun. Kye already loves the water and swim time at the pool and bath time are joyous moments for her. I am sure she will love the beach as well as of course does Heidi.
This may cause problems because I’m not really a beach bum at all. I get bored easily when faced with having to lounge around doing very little for extended periods of sunny time. I know everyone has their favourite Caribbean Beach. For some it’s Seven Mile Beach in Grand Cayman. For others it’s Trunk Bay on St. John or Megan’s Bay here in St. Thomas. However beautiful it might be, to me, a beach is a beach, rather like fireworks ………. Seen one, you’ve pretty much seen them all.
I am glad that it has been sunny this week though because thanks to Al Gore and his fellow beardies nobody ever expects it to rain in the Caribbean………and it does. It’s our fault as well though because rain is never shown in brochures……it’s always azure skies and endless sun. And I guess it does most of the time but when it does rain the guests look shocked……….”rain………in the Caribbean…………I don’t believe it!”
Snorkeling is of course the other main attraction and in St. Thomas and St. Maarten all the snorkel excursions are sold out. The sea here is a deep blue and crystal clear, with thousands of fish lazing around happy in the knowledge that they are about to be entertained by the astounded stares of the amateur Carnival Dream snorkelists who float around pointing and trying to speak to each other in bubbles – “Lkkkk is mpror fsh… ”, but at least they are relatively safe from fishermen.
As well as the cruise ships the calm waters and shelter of the bay here in St. Thomas is a magnet for some of the most impressive super yachts in the Caribbean. Heidi and I always used to play the “which one I’d buy” game when we were here together as we did in the Mediterranean as well. Would it be the one with the helicopter or the one with unbelievably tasteless 18th-century French furniture and two Monets? We eventually settled on a relatively modest one that had a couple of Jet Ski’s and a speedboat attached. What Heidi didn’t know was that I was imagining all the Latvian women my super yacht would attract.
As you can imagine I shake a lot of hands when I meet guests. Most have a normal handshake while have a shake like Richard Simmons’ thingy at a Latvian Lap Dancing Club and some shake your hand so hard you actually gasp in pain. Even worse than that though is shaking hands with someone who has just put a double thick layer of hand cream on. So much so that when you shake their hand, the cream shoots up between the gap at the top where your hands meet making a soft, farting type noise as you shake. Of course, the cream is then transferred to your hand and this last Captain’s Celebration my right hand smelled of lavender with a hint of vanilla.
Then there are the Italian officers who as you know like to kiss other men as a form of goodbye or hello. I have accepted this as a cultural thingy and am prepared to be kissed now and then and do so with a smile…..even though I think it’s camper than a disco dancing peacock.
However, a new monster has risen in past months……………the man hug. Male guests who read the blog, who know me and who want to show their thanks for a great cruise have started to hug me…………..and I don’t know how to respond.
It seems that men these days are no different to the ladies. We had a bit of a scuffle last week between two ladies in the dance club that involved some proper punching. When I go out to the pub with my mates I see men drink as much white wine as women. Yes, I know I am not one to talk with my Diet Coke but that’s for work and diabetes reasons. And women these days who are just as likely as men to have a tattoo of a snake disappearing down their arse crack.
Some things remain sacred though……..but for how much longer? So far I have not met a man who has ever dotted the “I” in his name with a little heart, or signed off with a smiley face. But that’s about it…..my fellow CD’s are using product in their hair and the Cloud 9 Spa does as many facials for men as they do for women. There is bugger all to differentiate us by.
So what about this hugging thing. Well women will hug each other even though they only net a few minutes ago by the cereal aisle at the local Publix and now men are doing the same. Yet “man hugging” is even worse. I had a guest hug me last week and he hung onto me for dear life. It used to be that if male mates wanted to go beyond the normal everyday handshake that they would do an “island ‘thing. I mean one of those complicated handshakes that looked like naked glove puppet grappling. This has been replaced by the man hug. And everyone as I said is doing it. Male guests, male crew ……….everyone.
Maybe it’s because men value the friendship of other men more highly than they can ever say. What’s next…I guess it won’t be long before us men will hug each other, look into each other’s eyes and say… “I love you. Never leave me. You complete me.”….… and that would mean we would only be one step away from the last major difference between us and women….going to the bathroom together.
It’s a man’s world……..my arse.
Sorry about my bad mood earlier…..I am really mad at myself ….and feeling a bit lonely.
Goodnight
Your friend
John
Look, friends — there are a few things you should remember before you comment. The space below is for you to post your comments about the post I've just written above. If it is something that's unrelated, please use the Ask John tab above. Now, while I may not be able to reply to your comment below, I do sit in my underpants almost every morning and read everything that is here. So feel free to comment on the comments and then if someone wants to comment on the comment to the comment then go ahead as well. Please be courteous unless the poster is French...........then you can say whatever you want.
John (please reply),
I just want to tell you really quickly how much I love reading your blog! You always tell the best stories.
We’re sailing on the Carnival Dream for our honeymoon cruise on April 17th. We’re sailing in one of the L shaped cabins (7448) and I’m very excited to get the bigger balcony. This is our first balcony, so I’m sure we’ll be spoiled from now on.
I was wondering if you could think of any ways to help make this cruise even more special for us. I’m going to try to get us a reservation in the Steakhouse as I’ve heard it’s fantastic. Any other tips to help make our honeymoon even better?
Thanks,
Ashley
I, personally, think you are a great husband, father and son. It show’s in the blogs and video’s that i have seen with you. One of my favorite’s is you with our parents and Heidi at dinner on a cruise celebrating their wedding anniversary. Your humor and love would make any mom or dad proud. One good thing about your job is, even though you have long stretch of being away, you also can have longer quality time in between contracts
.
oops, my last post i meant your parents not ours, my appologies
John, Don’t be so hard on yourself, you are a wonderful man, a great husband and father (I saw that for myself a few weeks ago), the BEST CD of all CD’s- of ALL cruise lines, the funniest, most brilliant, and most of all the most sensitive man to others feelings. Don’t let that Claire lady ruffle your feathers either! I know Heidi and your mum know how hard you work, so don’t let it get to you, and please don’t be sad! WE all LOVE you, and are so lucky to have you for our friend. You genuinely care about people! That makes you so special! So, come on back to the world of laughs, sunshine and roses, say that’s an idea, send them both the biggest bouquet of roses JUST BECAUSE, not because it is a holiday, but just because, OR send tulips from Holland for Easter, it will be here before you know it. Get back to being your FUNNY self, ok John? Cheers my dear friend! Linda
Be still lonely heart! Your responce was hilarious and not mean spirited. The kind blogger really was off her mark suggestiong she cared for you and wanted to sell you herbs to how much she cared….Bit of a bad mood is well derserved, but move on as quickly as you can. You have been given a “grace period” by your Mum and Kye’s Mum. Being so quick to think on your feet, I am certain you willl make up for missing Mum’s day and make up for it another way. mmmm…diamonds are always make-up worthy.
Kap
Thanks so much =)
if you need it, our room numbers on the Carnival LIberty are 2367 and 2369 (not sure which my parents will be in)
Not sure if you will get to read this seeing as you are a few weeks behind still and my cruise is in 11 days but its worth a try.
Thanks again =D
John,
I’m sure both your mom and Heidi understand the mishap of this year’s Mother’s Day. Since they are so understanding, you have nothing to worry about or feel bad about.
My first Mother’s Day, I was disappointed and quite upset. Not because my husband forgot about Mother’s Day, but because he managed to get every mother in his family and mine (so four mom’s, four grandma’s, three aunts, etc) a card AND a gift, yet managed to forget to get me a card. Had he simply forgotten EVERYONE, I wouldn’t have minded. Especially since we were out of town for a wedding. But the mere fact that he found time to get cards and gifts for everyone EXCEPT me really had me down. And it took him nearly two weeks to realize he had forgotten to get me something for my first mother’s day.
For his first Father’s Day I was kind enough to get him a Bucs jersey with the name of his favorite player on it. He says it was one of his worst gifts because it reminded him of how he forgot my first Mother’s Day and he assumed I wouldn’t get him anything.
At least you didn’t forget a day that is special for just your family like a birthday or anniversary. To me, those are more important than any of the comercialized holidays.
John, so sorry to hear you are now in Heidi’s doghouse ALSO. You’ve been in Pat’s doghouse for over a week now.
BIG ED
JOHN -please reply– You dont need to be so hard on yourself concerning Mothers Day oversight– Trust me , your mother, wife and daughter will love you even with some of these little lapses that we all experience and find that love actually grows stronger as a result of what would seem as brain dead omissions so long as you truly are remorseful and your comments say you are – - also wanted to comment regarding the mole problems you recently experienced. You can easily rid your yard of moles; by simply using the amazing “stinkanator” machine. I have exclusive marketing rights and will give you a special deal. Not only will the moles go but it will do away with many unwanted neighbors, relatives and so-called friends. Even though it can be very odorous it is harmless to the environment and highly recommended by the Stinking Creek Safe Consumer Assn (SCSCA). By the way my friend, thanks you so much for the CDs. My wife, Dolores, Sister-in-Law, Jackie want to express our appreciation to you and the Carnival team for an absolutely super dream cruise (ship has the right name) this past week. We had taken this cruise mainly in remembrance of my brother Clyde with whom we had enjoyed several cruises even though he was severely paralized in left side by a stroke in 2001. He passed on last September and we were just trying to heal and recapture some of the fun times we shared together. Clyde had a really good sense of humour and from the first night out I do believe he was with us in spirit and laughing all the time expecially after you put our birthplace “Stinking Creek” , Kentucky on the map forever. Our fellow passengers seemed to recognize and appreciate our heritage making this one cruise we shall never forget. You are indeed a most talented, professional entertainer on every count and we love you for the laughter shared and given to us throughout the cruise. Your Mother, Heidi and Kye can be very proud of you and I am positive they will forgive you for the Mothers Day oversight. Thank you again for these very special memories–God speed and keep em laughing — your fans forevermore–Dolores, Jackie, Clyde and Willard
(Stinking Creek) Hammons
Hi John
When I started reading your blog thingie today my heart skipped a beat and panic reached up and grabbed the family jewels! MOTHER’S DAY –yikes!– had I missed it too? Turns out I’m safe as our North American one is a couple months away. With regards to your missing it I’m so sorry it has you feeling blue. Your heartfelt writing really expresses your anguish – I feel for you as I’m sure all your other readers do too. Of course Heidi reads your blog too and I’m sure she feels your pain. As you have noted, she isn’t upset with your missing it, so please forgive yourself. Hopefully your mom reads your blog thingie too and likewise knows how you feel. She raised a good boy!
Thanks for keeping it real. You have a gift for expressing yourself. It is a gift to us, your blog readers, that you let us into your life sharing not only your joys but also the sadder times. It is appreciated.
Regards, Ross
Don’t feel bad about forgeting mothers day. Pick a day and send them something from the heart and thank them for being the Mothers in your life. DH forgot and then sent me two roses one in full bloom and the other a bud. They were from my boys. The full bloom from my husband and the bud from my 4yr old son. It meant more to me then if it had been closer to mothers day. He really did not have an excuse when he is in and out of stores that are advertizing it. Now go to your computer and in the Calandar thingy set a reacurring calander item to remind you every year. I am sure one of your Stephanies can help. Best of luck and Cheers!
John we are all here for you man, You have my email. Ok once again the complaints continue to get topped. I never ever thought compensation for kids or a preboiled egg could get topped. BUT DRUGGED IN THE CASINO???? By STAFF?? HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. John cheer up man you have an awesome job and are awesome at what you do!!!!!
Were Here for ya!
Frank and Bridie
John:
I know this won’t make you feel any better….but please believe me when I say you are not the only man to have forgotten a very special event.
I won’t go into the whole story, but the bottom line is that David forgot our first wedding anniversary.
There I was …. card in hand… and all I saw was a “deer in headlights”.
Yes, sadly it was a omen of things to come.
On September, it will be 20ish years later….and he would still forget, if not for his trusty Franklin Planner. (it is a paper version of a Personal Assistant and he goes NO WHERE without it) Not that writing it down really means anything…I still don’t get a card, gift or anything other than “happy anniversary” (after he looks at his Franklin Planner).
Claire Potter needs to sell a lot of Herbal Life and spend the money she makes on some etiquette lessons. Claire….”save yourself ” from further public humiliation and learn some manners.
David definately reserves “hugging someone of the male population” to relatives and VERY dear friends.
And even with the dear friends….there is a protocol. It is the firm handshake with one hand and patting on the back a couple of times with the other hand with no “bodily” contact.
Don’t be discouraged with the Mother’s Day slip up….your Mother knows you love her …. Heidi knows your love her ….. it isn’t anything that some diamonds won’t fix !!!
Linda (Mom of your friend DJ)
Dear John,
Mothers Day is celebrated in the US of A on May 9th. May I humbly suggest that you tell your Mum and the beautiful Heidi that since you are based in the US of A that you have adopted the dates that we Yanks celebrate how special they are to you. I then suggest that a dozen long stem roses make their way to both and a special sparkling ring makes it way to Heidi. It won’t get you off the hook for being so busy that you forgot the date that Mummy’s Day is celebrated back home but it is a second chance and you should definetly make the most of it mate.
I think you should go to Orient Beach on St. Maarten where you can burn your eyeballs out watching naked French people, and overweight cruise ship passengers. If you hate the beach normally you will really hate this one as bathing suits are bad enough. There are some places that the sun should never shine!
The Cruzin2some
James & Nancy Enslow
You’re not alone John. I’m the one in our family that usually forgets the special days. Even my own birthday! Pretty sad,huh? It’s usually my 86 yr. old mum that reminds me of my birthday or my anniversary. I’m sure a be-latted gift or flowers is just as nice as getting them on the special day.
Cheers, Angela 
John, I’m sure your Mum and Heidi will forgive you for forgetting Mother’s day. I can believe that with 4000 plus pax on that big ship, you have your hands full trying to keep everyone happy. I know when we are on a cruise and for that matter even at home, I forget what day or the date is. Nope I don’t have dementia or Alzheimers, I’m just retired and don’t have any deadlines to meet, nor a certain time to get up. Unless I have a doctor’s appt, I just laze around and do what I want, when I want. But you have so many responsibilities taking care of the wants, needs and entertainment of all of the passengers on the ship, that I’m surprised you can remember when to eat,,which if I remember right you did forget to do recently.
Maybe they will let you celebrate our Mother’s day In fact I won’t let you forget it, we will be on the Carnival Fantasy with you the day before Mother’s day. which is just 6 days before Kye’s birthday.
Gosh it doesn’t seem possible that sweet little one will be a year old in a couple of months. Where has the time gone?
Take care and don’t be so hard on yourself.
Carolyn
Happy Mother’s Day Heidi and Mum. You are both super Mum’s. Heidi is doing a marvelous job raising Kye, she is one great baby I would spoil her if I was around her very much……..
And Mum you raised a super son, so considerate of others with a great sense of humor….(spelt the right way)
Hi John,
Carnival Cruise Lines is sending me another Carnival Poster, the one with all of the current Carnival ships on it. You helped me get one a few years ago, but with all of the new ships, it’s sort of out of date. I know it’s normally only for travel agents but I do actually generate a lot of business for Carnival as the poster is hung up on my office wall and many people inquire about cruising with Carnival because of it. Anyway, CCC is sending me a new one and of course, I think it’s a cool poster. We are currently booked on the Carnival Valor for Sept and the Liberty for Jan 2011.
Eric
John I think you may have been on the ship to long. OK, you forgot your Mother’s Day. How in the heck do you even remember your name some days when you work so hard and care for so many people. You would need another helper other than Craig to remind you about even Mother’s Day. I’m pretty sure that your mother and Heidi wouldn’t mind receiving something after Mother’s Day from you. I think you worry far to much and you carry it inside of you far to long. I think that’s what usually do. It’s how they kick themselves in the ass I guess. REMEMBER, you are not a perfect person just like all of us. I forgot my dad’s anniversary of his death. I remembered it three days later and of course I hated myself until my mom said in her soft way, ” your dad won’t even noticed it”. Thanks to my mom I was able to laugh in my being upset. John, you are not perfect, but close to it. Smile and remember all the many people who have enjoyed just meeting you and laughing at the many different jokes that you have told. My knowing and meeting you as increased the good person I am. Relax John, you forgot something and it won’t be your last one, just like me, a normal person.
Paul F. Pietrangelo
Hello John
Please don’t be that hard on yourself. How is it possible to remember every celebration that there is, especially when you are living away from home?. At least if you were in England you would be bombarded with cards and adverts prior to the occasion. Technically that’s what normally reminds me that an occasion is upon us and I’m able to “remember” in time to send my wishes for anything that I should be sending.
When I came to live in Canada, I had done the same thing and forgotten Mother’s day . I told her that since I now lived here and there were no cards in March for something we celebrate in May, she would celebrate it two times. Once in March and another in May. Both Heidi and your mum really understand your predicament and know you love them dearly so once again “don’t be that hard on yourself”. Next time you’re back home you’ll just have to take that extra something special with you.
I cannot believe the comment card you posted about “drugging” the drinks in the Casino. That is so laughable and it’s not even funny. To even suggest that something like that happens on a cruise ship is just beyond me. As the saying goes “It takes all sorts”.
Wow it must be really busy with the Monster of the Seas at the same port plus three other ships as well!!!! When it becomes that busy you really have to be extra vigilant to ensure that you are back at your ship before it sails. All you can do is reiterate to the passengers to be aware of heavy traffic and keep fingers crossed that they all are aboard before you take off.
Cheer up John, we don’t like it when you are down and lonely!
Eva
Hi John,
Please don’t beat yourself over missing Mother’s Day in the UK. You are cruising with mostly Americans and Canadians so your mindset and internal clock has been Americanized for this period that you are cruising from Port Canaveral. LOL
To make up for it, send them something for Mother’s Day in May. We on the blog and the 343 Stepanies can remind you. It’ll be a surprise to your mum and Heidi as they won’t expect it. You know the saying “It’s 5 o’clock somewhere” when someone wants a drink…well you can use the same theory for Mother’s Day. It’ll be Mother’s Day ( in May ) in America and you will be cruising from an American port. I know it won’t be the same but can somewhat make up for your miss this month.
Mary ( The Shy One )
I’m sad to hear you’re feeling down regarding missing Mother’s Day . I’m sure your Mum and Kye’s Mum both understand how that could happen with your job. Both of the Mrs. Heald’s know that their John is a super generous, kind and loving son, husband and father.
I actually thought your reponse to “Claire” was about right……but you showed your kind nature by apologizing.
Keep smiling John, you truly are a remarkable man and you have so many fans you love you exactly how you are. Thank you for every thing you do for us and for your always brilliant sense of humour (spelt correctly, according to you)
Your OLD buddy,
Steve O
Poor John. I’m sorry you missed Mother’s Day for Heidi and your Mum. I know what it feels like to forget special times but it happens to us all at one time or another. You’ve got all the other good husband traits down perfectly.
The comment card from Big Tex is funny. The scary part if the guy wrote this he obviously believes it. He would rather believe what his wife told him than realize how stupid that sounds. That must have been some drug if it ruined half her cruise. I guess the other half was good?
I agree St. Thomas is a wonderful place to see the beautiful yachts and it does make you wish you could have one too. I love looking at the webcam and it looked like a beautiful day there today.
John, don’t beat yourself up. Call now and remind your mum how much your love her and as for Heidi, well, go online and order her the biggest, baddest flower boquet you find have have it delivered ASAP, oh, and call her too and tell her you did kick yourself in the butt for missing it……
St Thomas yachts–I have my name on TWO yachts–Princess Mariana (the one with a HELICOPTER! 258 feet, six decks..) and the Helios (198 feet and five decks…). I was on the Glory and my cabin faced the yacht club and I was oogling the yachts bigtime…*BG*…
Dear John,
PLEASE REPLY
I know you are busy but I was wondering if you could answer a quick question for me? Were you the CD on the Glory in September 2004?
I flew into Orlando and sat through a category 4 hurricane to go on that cruise – my very first might I add. I am happy to say I have been on 5 since then and am going back on the Glory on May 30. I am very excited and love Carnival. I have tried almost all other cruise lines and nothing compares to Carnival.
Keep up the good work John!
Thanks,
Joanna
Sorry you had to miss Mum’s day but I do want to thank you for sacrificing a very special day and being with your family because you were only trying to make our days the most memorable ever. After 28 year of marriage we were finally able to take a honeymoon (so you see, better late than never). My wife and I were on the March 6 Western Carib Dream. and it was truly a dream cruise. All I can say is:
I love you more than corn. I need you more than stinking creek, I want you more than Little’s D,,, and ho ho ho we had a yaba dabba do time!
John,
If I ever get the pleasure of having you for my CD, I will make sure to give you many hugs and tell you how beautiful you are.
Let’s face it, sometimes you just need a hug.
Dear John,
Pleease don’t get rid of the libraries. Both my husband and I love them! On the Legend of the seas I found a very funny book and every time I see that book at book sores or the Library I think of our Legend cruise. What about bringing used books at home for the library?
John,
IMO Claire Potter doesn’t deserve an apology, you do. How dare she be so rude as to comment on anyone elses appearance.
Her letter wasn’t worth the space it took to post it. Just ignore her, and other ignorant people like her.
First cruise and over $24K on penny slots..WOW…I’d say they’ll be loyal Carnival cruisers for life. Okay, the letter about drugging that lade in the casino to steal her money ….all I can say is..how do people think this stuff up? Oh well, it was good for a chuckle.
Keep up the good work..I love this blog.
John,
After reading your blog today, I just felt so bad for you and wanted to let you know that as a Mother and Grandmother, flowers, cards and candy are not important on Mother’s Day. (Hopefully my employer does not read that statement, as I work for a major greeting card corporation) I know you feel really bad about not rememebring the date, but believe me, your beautiful wife and lovely mother, know how much you love them, and it would make them sad to know that you are so down on yourself for this minor matter. Go ahead and send the flowers a little late, and tell them how much you love them. They know how difficult your work is and how it keeps you so busy….they really do understand…..and in the meantime I think all of your fans should send out wishes for a “Happy and Blessed Mother’s Day for Heidi and your Mum”
Dear John,
Claire was a bit of an arse talking about your wieght and never even having met you so don’t feel too bad about your comment to her. Personally I would have been much more offensive and thought your response was quite dignified. BTW, it was my sister who answered your question about why girls go to the restroom together. It will be the day when I see 2 big burly men holding hands walking into the “John” together! We also have had an ongoing joke up here on facebook about wanting and needing people more than corn that no one in the world except maybe 4000 people would get. It will get better John and I am sure your beautiful wife understands that it was not an intentional slip for Mothers Day. Just send them both gifts on the American’s Mothers Day and say you were on East Coast time! 
Poor fellow, I sense your sadness! I wish there was a way to make the ocean a litle smaller so you could see your girls more often but alas, I have to settle on sending you a big “girlie” hug from up here in Virginia!
Love,
Mrs Usis-Zahn
John -
So so sorry about your Mother’s Day error. You can right it though, sort of. Just celebrate the American holiday and surprise both your Mum and Heidi. Go all over the top and they’ll both be pleased and perhaps not so unhappy that the UK version was missed.
John,
If I may make a suggestion, anytime that I forget something big such as mothers day, or my fiancee’s birthday, I play it off. What I mean is, I plan some big, extravagant day and surprise them with a day totally dedicated to them. That way, you can say that you didn’t get it on (Mother’s Day, Birthday, Anniversary…etc) because you did not have everything finished yet. Call me forgetfull, call me what you will, but it works every time!
Cheers!
John -
I just wanted to let you know that I work with some of the most masculine men – cops – and hugging is a common thing. The will often shake hands and then put and arm around each other and pat the back. Of course, more often than not when they do this, they are wearing bullet-proof vest, carrying a 9 mm, 40+ bullets, at least 1 large knife, pepper spray and a baton!
As for the Mother’s Day – plan now and take advantage of the fact that the British one came first and you can regain yourself on the American one!
Most people I know (female-female,female-male, male-male) hug each other. This is especially true if they have not seen each other in a while. It might be a southern thing but it is common here.
John, (Please reply if you want to)
I don’t think you were rude to Claire. I think she was rude to YOU. I can’t imagine telling anyone, much less someone I really don’t know personally, that they need to lose weight and I have a product to sell them.
How would she have felt if you had met and you told her she is ugly? (I don’t know if she is or not, of course) What if you told her you knew a good plastic surgeon that could help her? I’m sure she wouldn’t be too happy with you. Some people don’t think and I feel she is definitely one of them.
As far as Mother’s Day is concerned, I do understand how you feel badly. My suggestion is to send Heidi and your Mum the flowers etc. for the US Mother’s Day as probably/possibly that’s where you will be on Mother’s Day here. I’m sure they realize how you feel and perhaps sending them the 2nd Sunday in May, will help you feel a bit better.
John – Please reply.
I just wanted to say I love your blog and read it daily when possible. When I am having cruise withdrawal it is the perfect pick me up. My family and I have sailed 7 times now and 5 of them with Carnival. I must say Carnival has the happiest, friendliest staff I have encountered and we have decided to only cruise with Carnival after checking out a few other cruise lines. My husband and I are leaving out on 4/22 on the Sensation for some well deserved couple relaxation – the kid can’t be out of school. It would be awesome if you could send some kind of small gift to our room – E229 we will be celebrating my birthday during that trip.
Thank you for the blog thingy, I hope you know how much everyone looks forward to it and says prayers for you and your family.
Once again thank you for all you do.
April M.
John,
I hope your spirits have improved by today. i am so sorry that you felt so down. Only a person who truly loves his mother, & wife would beat himself up over missing Mother’s Day. It just makes us all love you more. Call them both & say “I love you”! That’s what a mother wants most!
As far as the rude woman trying to sell her diet stuff, ignore her ! I was looking at the pictures on the blog & thinking, “John is going to need new clothes soon, he’s losing so much weight.” You are starting to look HOT!
Joyce
Dont beat yourself up too bad. Heidi loves you and will therefore forgive you. Probably more readily than you will forgive yourself. We are always much harder on ourselves, arent we? We love you and we all would have reminded you had you told us of the date difference…..Next year you will have 1000 reminders!!!
John,
I enjoy your blog, but please don’t be so hard on your self. You are a good husband and son & should set up important dates (birthdays, anniversary, mother’s day) on your calendar, computer, blackberry. That’s what I do. Facebook even reminds you. Hope this helps. Keep up the good work.
Cheers,
Peter
HAPPY ST. PATRICK DAY
“May your days be many and your troubles be few.
May all God’s blessings descend upon you.
May peace be within you may your heart be strong.
May you find what you’re seeking wherever you roam.”
Pat and Big Ed O’Konefe
Dear Irish Ed,
One of the wonderful ladies who work her decided to make Corned Beef and Cabage for the entire office to celebrate St. Patty’s Day and now the whole office smells like dirty socks.
I am goin’ to eat some anyway. All the best ta Ye!
The Cruzin2some
Hi, John!
I don’t think your reply to the woman about your weight was rude. I think it was rude of her to say those things to you and then to offer her “services.” She is a complete stranger and that was highly inappropriate.
What is happening to manners?
Let me add another Irish Blessing:
May the light always find you on a dreary day.
When you need to be home may you find your way.
May you always have courage to take a chance.
May you never find frogs in your underpants!
God luv ya !
Hapy St. Patrick’s Day John!!! Don’t let the Claire Potter’s of the world get you down. You are beloved by all of us who live and breathe your blog everyday!
John- Please reply
Don’t beat yourself up too hard about forgetting John. After we had our twins it was almost a full year until my first Mother’s Day and my husband called his mom and wished her a happy day and even reminded me to call my mom and then not a word for me! When I asked him about it that night his whole face went white and he said ‘I forgot you were a mom!’ He ran out and came home with a single red rose and did all the chores for a week to make up for it. The best thing you can do for a new mother is just appreciate all that she does and let her know that you notice all the hardwork she’s putting in and I’m sure Heidi notices that you already do that. You are a great husband and father and you’ll know when the time’s right to say goodbye to your Carnival Family. But hopefully not until we sail w/ you! Will you be on your Carnival Magic all next year? We booked our first cruise!!!! The Carnival Paradise out of LA in October. Our PVP Gary aka Gio was absolutely amazing and stuck w/ me for weeks while we went through numerous changes and options. We cannot wait but we’re hoping to sail w/ you next year. Any chance your bobble-head will be for sale on board thi cruise? And any idea when the CD schdule will be posted for Fall/Winter? Keep your chin up John and by the way Herbalife my arse!! The way you’re doing it works perfectly for you and your life and I don’t think your reply was rude at all. It was spot on. Besides losing 30 lbs in a matter of weeks isn’t a healthy option for anyone, especially for a diabetic. Good healthy food and excercise (aka watching what you eat and running around a huge ship making poeple laugh) is they way to go! Kye is beautiful and thanks for sharing the pics (she inherited that twinkle in her eye from you!) and keep having fun.
Your friend here from your ‘older’ sister company
John,
Holidays like Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Valentine’s Day were created to sell greeting cards. One day a year can’t possibly make up for the love and care Heidi provides for you and Kye. Ignore the manufactured holidays and just keep letting her know every day just how much she means to you. I guarantee that a small expression of your love every day will mean much more than some grand gesture once a year. You have nothing to be ashamed of, your love for Heidi shows in every bloggy entry. Besides, how many women can say that over six million people have seen how much you love your wife?
I have been following your blog for almost 2 years now. I very seldom write anything but read it always. You helped me with one of my cruises last year and Kye was born while we were at sea. I did send a thank you letter after our cruise on the Triumph to let you know what a wonderful job Debbie did with our private party… She really was great! She even came to our cabin to let us know about Kye’s “birth” day. Yep… Loved her!!
Anyway… I just wanted to take a minute to wish you a very Happy St. Patrick’s day… Nothing more…
Have a great day and keep up the good work. You are one of the main reasons we keep coming back. You… and the rest of Carnival’s crew. You’re all phenominal!!
Thanks again,
Bette
Hi John,
This is James and Cynthia from “Haines City” Florida. Sorry it has taken so long to write but we cannot let it go any further without saying you made our cruise Feb 20, 2010 on the Dream a wonderful time. We have shown friends and family our “Welcome Aboard” DVD where James had to profess his love for me and everyone has gotten a big kick out of it. Your sense of humor made that cruise sooo enjoyable – it was our 14th cruise, but will remain our very favorite one of all. We hope to have you as our Cruise Director on future cruises. Until we meet again, God Bless.
Hi John..THis time your picture matches your title “Bad Mood”. I couldn’t figure out why you said you missed Mother’s Day when it isn’t until May. I didn’t realize the UK had a different date. Thanks for enlightening me. But please don’t beat yourself up. I really think your ladies understand. You have so much on your plate with alll that you do for crew,passengers,bloggers etc. Everyone knows the love you have for your family is deeper than you could ever express. You have a big heart and it shows every day. Hope you feel the love and sincere thanks for all that you do. Our best to you and your beautiful family..A&W
Well, nuts, John. Sadly, you’re not the first guy to forget Mother’s Day and you won’t be the last. I know that does little to nothing to make you feel better about it but such is life. Foo.
$23,957.85 on a penny machine? Wow… I wonder if she would like to adopt a slightly mature child. What a lucky woman!!!
Regarding the ‘man hug’ thing. I happen to recall running into a great friend on our Carnival Dream who, despite being worn and tired, gave me a big hug. If I remember right, that was you.
Time to forgive yourself for your transgression and smile!
All the best to the Stephanies, Heidi and the lovely Kye!!
Ciao!
Host Mach
Hello John,
Here in New Zealand Mother’s Day is not until the 2nd Sunday in May, so become an honorary New Zealander and acknowledge your lovely Mother and Heidi then!!!! Last weekend we had our 14th annual Opera in our garden and the weather was kind once again. We had a wonderful 3 hours of beautiful music, lovely picnic hampers and champers and over 800 people having a fantastic time!!
I do enjoy reading your blog each morning, and can concentrate on that more now that our big concert is over again.
Cheers,
Joan
John,
My wife and I are sailing on the Carnival Dream on May 15, 2010. The past two cruises were on the Glory – which we enjoyed very much. Last year was my first time trying out karaoke and I had a blast. Regarding The Legends show, you listed the celebrity list, but I noticed that Ricky Martin was not listed. I was going to try to get up the nerve to try out for ‘Livin’ Lavida Loca.’ I have even been practicing that song since last year lol. I think I sound fairly decent. I was wondering if the Ricky Martin part has been dropped since it was missing from your list. As a side note, I think it would be cool to add a KISS character to the show if and when Carnival decides to update it. Although Paul Stanley’s is my favorite KISS character, Gene would be cool too. I don’t know if I could walk in 7″ platform boots with sea legs, but I would certainly give it a shot.
Very much looking forward to my cruise in May. Hope to hear back from you.
Best regards,
Paul…
John,
Don’t be so hard on yourself!!! You are a wonderful person, husband, father, son.
Oh, John!
I am so sorry that it’s taken me a while to catch up on your blog. And I am even more sorry that you missed Mother’s Day and feel so bad about it. I wish I could offer a solution, but what’s done is done.
You have asked forgiveness from the women who matter in your life, and they have forgiven you. Beyond that, there is nothing more you can do unless you can turn into Superman, fly around the Earth super fast, and change its rotation to turn back time. (I never did understand how that worked, though!)
When the U.S. Mother’s Day comes around (I think it’s May 9th?) make sure you send cards and flowers and an abundance of praise to your mum and Heidi. I know it’s not the same, but it might make you feel a little bit better.
So cheer up! There are much worse things in this world to worry about…like the Carnival casino conspiracy to drug guests and take their money.
Good luck and God bless,
Laura
Oh! One more thing.
My last cruise was just after the pig flu scare. So there was an announcement made during the muster drill by Butch, our CD, that there would be “no skin-to-skin” contact between the crew and the passengers.
Instead, he suggested we “bump it out.” Yes, it was a 70s disco hip move. Made for a very interesting captain’s party when everyone got to meet the captain and senior staff, yet couldn’t shake their hands.
Laura
hi John (please reply)
I have been following your blog for a few days now, and going back and reading up. I am enjoying it immensely. It reminds me of my last cruise and helps me look forward to my next cruise.
My hubby and I have booked on the Carnival Liberty for the May 14 sailing. We are heading to the Eastern Carribean. Our last Cruise was on the Glory in 2007 where we had Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Jimmy as our cruise director. He was hilarious. That was our “honeymoon cruise” and here we are 3 years later going on another. My parents went with us last time, but sadly they have both just passed away. My mother had wanted to do the eastern Carribean cruise, but every time she started planning, something would happen and dad would end up in the hospital.
Eventually she gave up trying, and cancer took her this past January. Dad being the gentleman he was, went first to prepare a spot. We truely believe that he didn’t think he could live without her so he simply gave in.
So hubby and I are going to live their dream for them. We are taking along our daughter, who will be almost 23 months when we sail, and his brother ( to look after the daughter so we can have fun!!) I would like to know what there is for Children that small. She is quite independant but have been advised by our booking agent that under 2 years are not allowed in Camp Carnival. Also, how safe is the ship for a toddler? We have a balcony room, should we be worried about her getting on the balcony?? We wish we could get a suite, as she is a bit terrified of the shower, we are not sure how to get her clean while onboard, and suites have tubs.
Anyways, rambling over, what is there for small children to do on board when they can’t attend camp carnival? I have booked the butterfly experience while we are in St Thomas, but other than that I dont see much.
Please let me know what you suggest!
Maurene