Want to share two stories with you which show the drastic differences between some of the people you meet on a cruise ship. Let’s start with the good. The captain and I met a brilliant couple at the captain’s celebration on elegant night. We were standing outside of the Red Carpet Dance Club when a man in his late seventies possibly early eighties shook our hands and then introduced us to a beautiful young who looked like she was in her late twenties.
She was stunning in a supermodel kind of way. “This is Chantelle,” he said and honestly I was milliseconds away from saying “Is she your granddaughter?” when thank the Lord he continued “We are on our honeymoon.” Now the obvious reaction to this is to say “Are you kidding me?” and while neither the captain or I said this I know…….I absolutely know……..both our faces painted an obvious picture of “You lucky sod, you must be worth a fortune.”
They were both very nice people and after they left the captain and I both shook our heads in disbelief both knowing what the other one was thinking. But later that night I started second guessing myself. I mean……supposing he was as poor as soap seller in Paris. We can all work out why wealthy men can bag gorgeous women even when they have a face like a welder’s workbench but maybe this couple was different. I had a quick look at the manifest to see what stateroom they were in………it was one of the penthouses…………which proves just as I said ………….lucky sod must be loaded.
Then there was this incident.
Guest: Mr ———–Ref: 842023049A
Cabin: ——— Added-Changed: 09/19/10 – 09/19/10Cabin – REFUSED TO ATTEND BOAT DRILL
Floor supervisor reported that guests in cabin ——- refused to attend boat drill and remained in their cabin. Guests were advised that they must attend and then guest started screaming and swearing with bad language and pushed ______ out of the cabin and slammed door. Security informed.
So, let’s get this straight shall we. Not only did this guest not want his wife and son to know how to save their lives in a real emergency but he also physically shoved the cabin supervisor from the entrance of the cabin into the hallway. Obviously, 99% of the guests go but that’s 1% who doesn’t and I bet you it’s the same on every ship sailing with passengers…..and you know what…. .. I blame the airlines.
How often have you been on a plane and looked across the aisle to see people reading, talking, sleeping and farting while paying absolutely bugger all attention to the flight attendant. And they do this because most of us think it’s a complete waste of time. In the whole history of civil aviation, I don’t think one single life has been saved by a lifejacket or from having your tray table in the upright position. These are the people who think don’t bother telling us anything because either the plane is going to reach its destination, or it is going to plunge into a mountain at 500 mph and explode into a million pieces. Either way, you will not be needing a “whistle for attracting attention.” However, me……well I always pay attention and listen because even though I know that if the plane crashes that there will be bits of fried senior cruise director scattered over the runway…….I respect that the flight attendants are doing their job…..and trying to at least give us a tiny chance of survival.
Now, let’s move onto the second part of the story, the bit where this guest shoved the crewmember. Can you imagine if we did this to the airline staff what would happen? Even asking them why we have to pay a billion dollars for a Diet Coke we risk being accused of air rage and thrown off the plane. It’s the same story at the check-in desk. Or at a car hire desk. Or at Wal-Mart. It’s the same story everywhere. React and you will be thrown out, by a security guard and before you know it you’re lying on the sidewalk with a broken spleen. I still don’t know what will happen to this guest but if it were up to me ……..he would be disembarked in Puerto Vallarta and made to drink three gallons of un-purified Mexican water, locked in a room and given one Post It note……… to use as toilet paper.
Time for today’s Q and A…..let’s get on with it.
Stacy Asked:
Dear John (Please Reply):My future husband and I will be sailing on the Legend on October 24th for our Honeymoon. I have grown up “cruising” and my fiancé’ has never been on a cruise. In fact, he’s never really been on a vacation at all. I want for him to love cruising and I think that the Legend’s Western itinerary will woo him! We have an obstructed balcony booked (5236), and I’m starting to get really excited! We have been planning this wedding and honeymoon for a year now, and I want it to be very special. I showed him your blog, which I have been following for years, and now I’ve caught him reading it on more than one occasion! I think it’s one of the reasons he decided we should cruise for our honeymoon. He admitted that he thinks you are really funny! Would it be possible to send him a note on our cruise? I know that it would make him feel very special.
Thanks again for all you do.
StacyJohn Says:
Hello StacyThanks for the great posting which shows the obvious love you have for your new husband and how excited you are about your honeymoon cruise. I know the crew of the Carnival Legend will make sure it is your best cruise ever and that it gives you the perfect start to your married life. I will ask the CD to send you both a little something. Have a wonderfully happy wedding day and a brilliant honeymoon cruise.
Best wishes to you both
JohnKerri Asked:
Hello John, (Please reply at your leisure)I hope all is well and I know you are getting excited about the impending visit from your girls. Do you have a countdown clock like most of us do when you are waiting to see them again? I hope so. Mine is slowly ticking off the days until we take out first ever family vacation that my husband will be able to attend. He is a charter/commercial fisherman and works the worst hours 11 months out of the year. Seeing he is on the water most of his waking hours, a cruise vacation is not his “idea” of a good time BUT – he hates snow and we vacation when the boat is in dry-dock so our choices are limited. Cruising is like Crack for me so I am super excited for this chance to be together as a family.
For the first time in 11 years, we will all vacation together aboard the Carnival Dream on January 22nd. We will be celebrating my birthday and our anniversary on this cruise and I pray for warm sunny weather and calm seas throughout. And, a little luck in the casino would be a plus.
I would like to know who our cruise director will be. Any chance you could get your sticky little fingers on a CD schedule for 2011?
See I have no sob story, I do not want a ship on stick, I have no special dining requests other than NEVER being stuck at a table beside the winch that never stops whining about being stuck in the ghetto if the dining room AGAIN. Do you know how incredibly hard it is not to be ugly to another guest when they are being snotty, rude and obnoxious? I know it is part of your job to listen to silly complaints but I saw it nowhere in my cruise contract that said I couldn’t wish that a waiter would trip and dump a tray of beet soup on some crabby, hish-and-mighty snot of a woman.
See John, this is my cruise ship fantasy – To see all these terribly pessimistic, negative people get exactly what they deserve. See I know how fortunate and blessed I am to be able to vacation with my family.
Thank you for this blog, thank you for making reservations and sending gifts, thank you for recognizing that some of us work very hard. Thank you for recognizing that Cancer happens and people like to have an outlet such as you to express their love and devotion because that is the way they shout it to the world. So as long as you are doing this blog thingy, I will let you be you and do as you see fit to make someone smile, feel special or at minimum not be stuck by the evil booth monitor in the MDR.
Keep up the fantastic work John. Some of us happy people will be here to support you as long as you continue.
John Says:
Hello KerriWell the girls are here and I am enjoying every minute with them, thanks so much for asking. I can imagine how hard your husband must work and how much you miss him when he is away from you and we are honoured that despite spending most of his life on the water that he has d hard earned vacation. We have not yet completed the CD schedule for 2011 although I think it’s a good bet that the CD on your Carnival Dream cruise will be the fabulous Butch Begovitch. Now, what I can tell you is that you need to send me a post via the blog thingy a month before you sail so that I can send you both a little something. Yes……..I know that you didn’t ask for anything but I really would like to send something so please send in your details. Thanks again for all the kind words. I wish your husband calm seas and loads of fish.
Best wishes
JohnShaRee Hirschi Asked:
*Please Reply*John,
I so thoroughly enjoy reading your witty blog. Anyone who writes, “British” pissed apocalyptic quantities of oil into the ocean” is ok in my book. ?
My husband and our 3 kids will be on The Splendor September 26 with my cousin, her husband and 2 kids. It is everyone’s first cruise except me, if you count the Mexican Baja with Carnival 10 years ago. We are all in our 30’s with kids age 7-12 and are very excited about this cruise and especially happy you are the CD.
I have a few questions. What are the formal nights and are children allowed in the Steakhouse?
Also, I am writing to ask a huge favor. My baby (well he used to be), Trey turns 8 on October 2nd. That is our last full day at sea. I don’t know what to do to make that day special (other than take him on a flippin’ cruise). Is there anything you can do to help me? He is in cabin 6338 with me.
We have early dining for the 9 of us, cabins 6338, 6317, 6315. Is there a way to request a dining table with a view? I don’t know what is good or even available. What do you recommend and what are our options?
Can’t wait to meet you,
ShaRee HirschiJohn Says:
Hello ShaRee HirschiThanks mate, glad you are enjoying the blogs. I realize that sometimes my humour (spelt correctly) is a little ummmm….British. Anyway, the elegant nights are on Monday and Friday and yes indeed, children are allowed in the Steakhouse. Funny you should ask because I will be writing about this in a moment. Please make sure that on the Friday morning you write me a little birthday wish for your son and leave it at the guest services desk and I will read it out live on the TVs and the big screen on Lido. He will see and hear his name and I will also send him a birthday present as well. I will ask the maitre d to do his best to assist you with a table as well. I will see you all very soon.
Best wishes
JohnDanny Stout Asked:
John, please reply…Dearest John,
Thank you so much for helping to make last year’s cruise to the Western Caribbean on the Liberty a wonderful experience. The table you helped arrange for my partner and I added to an amazing experience for our second cruise. We had such an amazing time we are bringing my nephew on the same exact cruise this coming year. He’s quite excited, and honoured (spelt incorrectly
that we are bringing him. I can’t wait to see him in Grand Cayman swimming with the Sting Rays.
I wanted to tell you that I really enjoyed what Carnival has done for the tours in Jamaica. After reading about some experiences there, I was a bit worried. However, it was an amazing experience. We did the plantation, shopping and Dunn’s river falls tour and had a great and amazing time. You can tell the care with which Carnival thought out the guest experience and it was very much worth it. Even though I feel more comfortable with the island now, we will be using the carnival tours there again. Thank you and your Carnival family for that experience.
Now, about my question. What can I recommend for my nephew on the Carnival Liberty? He’ll be 14 when we sail, by just four days. We sail on January 29th and he will have turned 14 on the 25th. Do you think Camp Carnival is good for kids his age? What kind of activities do they have? You see, we need something to occupy him while we go contribute to the casino, and maybe get some “quality time” together.
The only thing we will be missing is Butch. He was an amazing CD, and while he makes and awful ugly Dolly Parton, the energy he gave off was fabulous. Hopefully the next person lined up will be just as brilliant.
Take care John, and thank you for being you, even if you use the incorrect spelling of words occasionally.
Sincerely,
DannyJohn Says:
Hello DannyIt’s my pleasure to help people whenever I can and it’s always good to know that it is appreciated and that things worked out. I totally understand that Jamaica is not everyone’s cup of tea but as I have made no secret here, I love it and encourage everyone to visit the island at least once. It is full of flavour (spelt correctly) and our shore excursion packages truly show you the real island and the people that live there. Dunn’s River Falls and Mystic Mountain are amazing places to see and there is so much to do and to experience.
Your nephew will be able to go to Circle C which is our club for 12 – 14 year old kids or young teens or young adults or whatever they are called these days…….by the way, when did it become incorrect to call a 14 year old a kid? Anyway, he will love the activities there and for sure he will make many, many new friends leaving you both plenty of “you” time as well. Why not drop me a post a month or so before you sail so I can send him something. As for Butch being an ugly Dolly Parton……I promise you he is an Adonis compared to my fat ugly body clothed in a dress. Sometimes there just isn’t enough vomit in the world. Thanks again for taking the time to write and my best wishes to you all.
John
Brady Asked:
John Please Reply (if you want)John, I am a long time Blog Stalker and have submitted comments very few times, but I think enough is enough.
Never let someone make you feel bad for the actions of someone else. I tell my wife all the time (when she is mad at me) I can’t make her feel a certain way. You choose to be mad or choose not to be. It is all in how you decide to react (she didn’t buy it either). Be proud of being British and kindly smile at those types of people and move on. There are alot of Tofu eating beard types that would rather save a Mongolian Termite eating six-legged brown nosed three toed ant over the normal advancement of the human race. These guys are ready to throw the book at anyone they can blame. Just like that Brad Jolie character – he decided he would change his mind and agree on the death penalty for the BP executives. Really?!?!?
I have to say that I tune in every morning to read your blog and I am now one of your friends on Facebook. I brag on you everyday to my wife about how hard you have to work to satisfy the thousands of guests on board and the hundreds of thousands of bloggers that look forward to reading about your day.
I know people tell you everyday how great you are and I am sure you are getting tired of hearing it
Keep having fun and doing what it is that has made you so successful both at work and in life. People like you for a reason and I would take the hundreds of thousands of blog readers over two or three miserable people. If they don’t want to read about you being generous then stop reading. You have way more patience then most of us out here, that’s for sure.
We sailed with you a while back and I cannot remember if it was the Destiny out of San Juan or another one. The wife and I will be on the Elation in October so we will have to miss another opportunity to see you again.
By the way – we sailed on the Holiday and had a CD that liked to say “Hee Haw Haw”, who was that and is he still around?
Keep on doing what you do.
John Says:
Hello BradyLet’s start with the sad news. Mr. He Haw Haw was none other than Dave Armor who was incomparable………and I mean incomparable. We lost him to cancer some years ago and he is much missed by everyone who knew him.
Now on a happier note I want to say thank you for those great words of support. It is puzzling to me that people only read the blog thingy to find something to say that they know will be hurtful and provocative……I just don’t get it. But they are a minority and that is the most important thing I have to remember and thanks to words like yours and the many others who take the time to write and tell me they enjoy our blog………well……..I will be OK.
Please if you have time can you let me know your cabin number for your Carnival Elation cruise as I would like to send you a little something? Thanks again and oh yes, please mark your post time sensitive.
Best wishes to you and your wife
Johnsharecruises Asked:
Hi John, please respond….You said (about disco on Splendor)
“And since we made the ships dance clubs non smoking the aroma of cigarette smoke has been replaced by the overbearing stench of hair gel”
Is this good news true?? Are the discos non smoking?
If so when did this come about??
I hope so. Specifically…Destiny, Imagination and Glory. *I am booked on them.
ThanksJohn Says:
Hello SharecruisesThe dance club (I have to stop calling them discos) here on the Carnival Splendor is indeed smoke free. I checked with my colleagues and as I thought it was done specifically here on the Carnival Splendor to appease the Californian guests. The three ships you mentioned do allow smoking in the dance clubs. Please let me know if you need anything else
Best wishes
JohnMarty Paul Asked:
Hi John! (Please reply),Just a quick note to say hi from the “new” Mr. & Mrs. Paul, as Jeanne & I were recently married in Niagara Falls, Canada on July 30th. By the way, I found the Canadian version of the “Bridge of Sighs” in Venice, it’s called the “Kissing Rock” (I’ll send a photo of it later).
On our whirlwind “Crossing Both Borders Tour 2010″ in July, we cruised to Mexico on the Carnival Ecstasy (an outstanding cruise by the way and the ship looks “brilliant”, to borrow a word from you) and then a week later, crossed the northern border into Niagara Falls, Canada for our wedding!
So catching up with the “bloggy thingy”, Cruise Critic & the Carnival web-site. Needless to say, I share your enthusiasm on the Red Frog pub on the Carnival Magic (I entered my coaster slogan). Awesome that Carnival will have a specialty brew called Thirsty Frog Red (I love red ale by the way). So, with the spectacular news, just 3 quick questions;
1. The Red Frog has an outdoor seating area. May I be so bold as to ask if cigars will be allowed there (sorry, didn’t mean to open up that “can of worms” again!)
2. Can you (or Carnival) tell us who brews the Thirsty Frog Red for Carnival?
3. And, will Thirsty Frog Red be available at my local grocery store?
Thanks in advance and have to go, as Jeanne & I are off to see Gordon Lightfoot tonight in downtown Houston, and of course, my favorite (spelt correctly) song of his is “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald”.
Re the 2 small-minded nuts who linked you to the BP oil spill because you’re British and complained about the letter from David battling cancer…I have just 4 words in the form of a question for them; “ARE YOU KIDDING ME”??
Best wishes from Houston-Galveston, Texas…home of our Carnival Magic AND the Red Frog Pub!!
Marty & Jeanne Paul
John Says:
Hello Marty and Jeanne PaulMany congratulations on your marriage. The spot sounds beautiful and all of us here on the blog thingy wish you many happy years together. Now, let’s answer your questions. The one thing I can definitely tell you is that the RedFrog will be no smoking. Cigars will be smoked on The Lanai as they are on your Carnival Dream. I read a review on the blog thingy yesterday that said the area was not comfortable enough and the writer was correct. Cigars are supposed to be smoked in comfortable chairs in a laid back atmosphere so while The Lanai is a perfect area to smoke without having people sneer at you for doing so, we do need to upgrade the furniture there and I am going to be working on that for both your Carnival Magic and Carnival Dream.
I know that when we decided to have our own signature beer that many were tested by the top beards at Carnival. The end result was that apart from everyone having to take taxis home and two male vice presidents telling Gerry Cahill “I Love you man” the winner was chosen. Now as to who is brewing it I don’t know if it will be available outside of a Carnival ship but I promise I will find out as soon as I can and post it here. There has been lots of excitement about the Red frog Pub and we have to get this right as expectations are high. And so over the next few months I will be working with various beards to make sure we do. Once again, many congratulations and stay tuned for more Red Frog information.
Best wishes to you both
JohnWilliam Jordan Asked:
Hello John –Such a fun blog.
I have a question about the carry on one bottle of wine per customer on Carnival. Is that policy still valid?
The other question concerns how to care for the bottle on board the ship. My wife and I are thinking of bringing aboard a bottle of our fav champagne each. I understand there are corkage fees and have no problem with that at all. What I want to know is — can we bring our bottles to the dining room before dinner and have them stored and chilled there? Or do I need to keep them chilled in our cabin and bring a bottle with me to dinner?
If the staff will store and chill the bottles who should I give them to? When should I turn them over? And what would be an appropriate gratuity for their safe keeping?
If it is important to know the ships to answer, the cruises we have booked are the Fascination 5 Night Bahamas and Key West, and the Valor 7 Night Western Caribbean.
Thanks again — your blog is a highlight of my day lately.
John Says:
Hello William JordanThat’s great to hear and I hope you continue to enjoy the blog thingy each day. You are indeed allowed to bring a bottle of champagne and I would suggest you just give it to your waiter the night before you wish to drink it and he or she will store and chill it for you. This is something that happens a lot so please don’t be worried about asking. Your gratuities are already taken of your Sail & Sign card so there is no need to tip extra, really there isn’t. If you wish to though, well whatever you decide will be very generous indeed. Please let me know if you have any other questions.
Best wishes to you both
JohnCornacopia Asked:
Cruise Critic readers voted Carnival’s ice tea the worst in the cruise business with everyone complaining that the aftertaste was disgusting. RCI was voted the best. I sent the link of the thread to your president Cahill and surprise surprise I have not had any reply yet you would think that he would sit and take notice of this as it is very important if he wants to be the president of a company that has the worst ice tea voted by cc readers who sail on his ships all the time.
John Says:
Hello CornacopiaGoodness that was a long sentence. Does your computer not have any commas or periods?
I am not an ice tea drinker so I cannot comment on this except to say I will pass your thoughts onto someone in our food and beverage department. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if other cruise lines, including the Besticeteaintheworld of the Seas, use the same mix as we do. Thanks for letting me know your thoughts.
Best wishes
JohnThe Bears – Princess Barb of the Evil Krewe Asked:
PLEASE REPLYHi John,
I have already toured the http://www.CarnivalMagic.com and there seems to be a problem with the contest for the Red Frog Pub…. no old people can submit an entry (of course this does not include me since I was born after 1950). Is this contest limited only to people born after 1950. There are some people out here that still like to have fun that are on Social Security or will be soon. LOL Please could you have those men and women (?) with beards take a look into that?
Looking forward to cruising hopefully, with you on that beautiful Magic ship.
Love and Hugs to Heidi and Kye!John Says:
Hello The Bears – Princess Barb of the Evil KreweUmmmm……..not sure I understand this? Are you telling me that the bit where you have to fill in your date of birth only went to 1950? If so, that is an error for sure and a big one at that. Please accept my apologies and I will make sure this is corrected for all future contests. I know you and I know how spirited you are. Sorry again and I hope to see you soon.
Best wishes
John
That’s all for today and please keep the comments coming.
That was an interesting question about the steakhouse and if guests can bring children. Well the answer is yes of course they can. I want to say this straight away because I was sent this posting today by one of the 344 Stephanies. It was posted today but I want to jump this to the front of the queue so I don’t spend the next few weeks answering multiple questions about it as we did power strips, hamburgers and dancing in the dining rooms.
Long Tall Sally:
JohnYou have been heaping scorn on us Cruise Critic people because we hate the dining room dances and one day this will come back to haunt you for sure. Here is another poll which you may choose to scorn again but if you were any kind of professional you would see many oppose children being allowed in the steakhouses. THEY RUIN IT!
Read this http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=1277431
So?
John Says:
Hello Long Tall SallyLet’s get one thing as clear as a naked man in Saran wrap……..I have never once scorned anyone on Cruise Critic and many of the blog readers are CC members as well and I appreciate their input always. Anyway, thanks for the link and while I understand your opinion on this I don’t see how we could possibly call ourselves a family cruise line (which we are proud to do) and not allow children in. How could we say to one of the many multi-generational families we have on our ships that two people celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary cannot do so in the Steakhouse because their grandchildren are not allowed? If a kid is misbehaving then it is down to good parenting to take care of this but outside of that and maybe the consideration that there is no children’s menu……..I think I can safely say that we intend to carry on as is and allow children to dine in our fantastic steakhouses. I wonder though Sally……..have you actually ever eaten there…….just curious?
OK, I need a break and I expect after that…….and I expect you do to, so let’s have a look at this. Each week I encourage a man to be more romantic and this week he is quite the character. Have a look.
I wonder if she will take his last name……….he has done the dance four times already this cruise and the audience loves him.
We had awful weather yesterday as tropical storm Georginabastard poured rain upon us and gave us dark skies. But the mood on the ship was great and I had every seat taken at my marriage show. I met Mr. and Mrs. Shapiro who got married in 1939 which for the mathematically challenged means they have been married for 71 years…………and here they are
We are here in PV today and found a surprise waiting for us…….the Marinated of the Seas ……..and the sod had pinched our pier. Anyway, thank goodness the weather is nice because these guests deserve it after the first 2 days of gloom.
So….let me ask you a question. What’s the most offensive thing you could possibly do on a cruise ship? Run up and down the promenade naked shouting “Give it to me baby,” or eat a chocolate melting cake for dinner?
Well, it seems that very soon it will be the latter because eating healthily is now the law, and anyone who disobeys is a demented suicidal idiot.
Just last night, Heidi, Kye and I were sitting on Lido Deck enjoying a bit of peace and quiet at the alternative dining. On my plate I had some short ribs, loads of something called broccoli and a dollop of horseradish sauce. That’s it….I had ignored the pasta, the bread and every dessert…..it was me, my family and my low carb dinner. Then out of nowhere pounced an assassin. Honestly, I never saw her coming but there she was, standing right next to me…….a lady in her fifties ……… wearing an oversized badge that said “I lost 40 pounds, ask me how” ……. yep ………… I was about to be Herbal-lifed. There were no niceties, she was on a mission so with the usual “Sorry to bother you” which was bollocks because she wasn’t sorry to bother me……and proceeded to tell me….in front of my wife and daughter …….during our dinner…..that I was fat bastard.
At first I stood and listened. And then I thought, hang on, it’s MY bloody throat and I can stuff as much salt down it as I like. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not disputing whether these anti-pie, tea drinking people have the potential to help you lose weight. I’m sure they do. But what kind of person can just walk up uninvited to a complete stranger and tell them he’s fat?
Listen, obviously I have to be careful here because we value everyone’s business but on a personal note I think what she did was a despicable thing. Some may say that being the CD makes it OK for things like this to happen and maybe they are correct. But not in front of my family and not while I am eating dinner. We had a group of Jehovah’s Witness on two weeks ago and they didn’t walk around the decks knocking on cabin doors trying telling guests to put down their copy of the Fun Times and pick up a copy of the Watchtower. They respected everyone and didn’t force their beliefs on anyone. That was not the case with this lady.
Besides, if the teas she has been drinking have turned into a predator who feels she is justified to say what she did to me and no doubt other extra medium guests…….well she can bugger off.
So I have decided to fight back. While I know I have to eat healthier for the sake of Kye and Heidi and of course myself………what I should do — but I can’t is encourage guests to gorge their way through every meal, every buffet and punish the ice cream machines so much they explode.
And to show commitment to the cause, I might even eat an entire suckling pig on stage tonight.
Goodnight
Your friend
John
Look, friends — there are a few things you should remember before you comment. The space below is for you to post your comments about the post I've just written above. If it is something that's unrelated, please use the Ask John tab above. Now, while I may not be able to reply to your comment below, I do sit in my underpants almost every morning and read everything that is here. So feel free to comment on the comments and then if someone wants to comment on the comment to the comment then go ahead as well. Please be courteous unless the poster is French...........then you can say whatever you want.
John, How about asking the printing department to make you up a button that says something about “DON”T ASK ME HOW TO LOSE LBS” or maybe go stronger and say something about “flush your herbal life down the drain”.
Hmm The things I could think of that would be the worst thing to do on a cruise ship would be to blow smoke into the next balcony all the time. Or to vomit down on the cabin balconly below or even to rudely blame the cruise director or crew memebrs for things they have no control over like the weather or sea conditions.
Big Fans As Allways,
Frank and Bridie
Hello! I was introduced to your blog by my friend and I love it! She and I are taking a cruise in February of 2011 for her 50th birthday. She has wanted to take a cruise since she was 15 years old and is finally doing it. What I would like to know is if you can do anything special for her on her birthday? Doesn’t have to be much but she is very special and I would like to make her first cruise memorable! We are sailing on the Legend and her birthday is February 28th. Thank you so much!
Make sure to repost with John, please reply so that John can reply to your message.
For your friend’s birthday, you can order a cake, get room decorations and other things from the Carnival website too.
Thanks! I thought I was doing that but I guess not! I am not very computer savvy so I will have to figure it all out. Thanks for the information on cake and decorations!
The chocolate cake is really good too
Hey Long Tall Sally … Shut up you don’t speak for me or any of the other 100 thousand or so CC members.
You are an embarrassment to the entire CC community. Especially espousing a poll that shows 21% support your position.
It’s actually closer to 650,000… The sad thing is that a number of the people who post here and criticize John and/or Carnival aren’t even Cruise Critic members. However, some are and it makes me ill.
I’ve devoted thousands of hours to Cruise Critic to try to make it somewhere that anyone can visit and gather information. Now, it seems, that Cruise Critic is being used as a hammer in some people’s attempts to drive their own personal agenda. In my mind, that sucks.
Can ya’ tell I’m frustrated?????
Host Mach
Kudos to you Mach. I am an embarrassed CC member who also doesn’t appreciate when others take it upon themselves to speak for me. I appreciate all of your hard work on CC and I more than appreciate John’s patience with the few that expose thier hatefulness and personal agendas on this blog.
Seems like CC members feel they can come on here & be rude & obnoxious to John. They fail to remember that he does have a job but he’s not our slave.
Just a note to CC – we were on a cruise last year and had signed up on the CC website – ordered the buttons from Marilyn, the whole CC experience – we had a group of friends totally about 30 people – we did not have our buttons yet, because we had packed them in our suitcases (TSA and all that we decided it was better to pack). Long story – short – we (about 8 of us) sat on the Lido Deck next to about 10 people who did have the CC buttons on – we were treated so rudely by the members – they way they talked about other people on the ship, etc., and just the demeanor of these people in general – none of us even took our buttons out of the room. I understand that everyone is not like this – but it didn’t leave a good feeling with any us.
Dear John,
You should remind these people that there’s no soliciting on board. Failure to comply should mean disembarkation. You should not have to put up with this. They could be lovely people but maybe the top people at HL should tell their reps that what they are doing is unacceptable.
Irene Garner
I was thinking the same thing. No soliciting on board. Good reason to tell her, to keep it to herself!
I also think that Security should be making a visit to her cabin and reminding her about the “No soliciting” rule
Hey John,
Please reply when you find time……no rush.
Just curious……are you allowed to promote products while a passenger on a Carnival ship? Maybe the men with beards should add that to the contract and then you wouldn’t have to be bothered by the HL assasins.
Apart from the fact that she was RUDE and has no ethics……………be honest and tell her that you’re not interested and please don’t bother any other guests!
You’ve got the clout to do that and as Senior Cruise director each of the other ships should be instructed to do the same.
I honestly don’t know what has become of people that think they have free reign to interupt others while dining in the name of trying to SELL something. Get a life……………….you’re on vacation people . Drop the blackberry and order forms and CHILL for a few days.
You can bother others once you hit dry land again later next week.
I hope Heidi and Kye are having a wonderful time on board with you.
I see that Thomas Lloyd is quite a better dancer than I was in January on the DREAM. He needs to work on the pelvic thrust………….beat him hands down on that move. LOL
Smooth sailing.
From you friends that are 137 days from the MIRACLE southern itinerary…….can’t wait. Any idea who the CD will be?
All the best,
B&D from Canada
I think i would have gone off big time if someone came up to me in frount of my family at restaurant like that person did.
Hi John (no need to reply),
Thank you for the post reply regarding the Red Frog Pub and smoking cigars in the outdoor seating section.
I perfectly understand Carnival’s moving toward more “no smoking” on their ships, as that reflects what society (at least in the U.S) is doing.
I agree with you, more comfortable chairs out on the port side Lanai on the Carnival Dream & Magic would make a world of differnce. By the way, when I was sitting out there enjoying a cigar in the Med last October, even that area is not immune from the sneering people that are using the promenande deck to walk/jog around (even when there is a jogging track on a higher deck!). The sneering people even made loud, fake coughing & hacking noises as they walked/jogged by.
Just thought I’d let you know about that little twist. Recommend enlarging the letters on the “smoking area” sign on the port side Lanai, so the sneering walkers/joggers can see them easier. Us fine cigar smokers can’t win, can we?
Hope to sail with you & have a cigar!
Marty Paul (& Jeanne)
I don’t smoke, but if it’s a designated smoking area and I go through it, I really have no right nor desire to act like that. I do love the smell of cigar smoke though!
If they put “more comfortable” chairs out on the Lanai us smokers will still end up standing because non-smokers will be sitting in them. They will do the coughing and fanning their faces if we try to set near them.
BIG Ed
We need a real cigar bar. Come on Carnival
John
The video with the couple married 71 years really touched my heart today. Don’t we all wish we were able to spend 71 years with the one we love.
I know you cannot say anything about a guest, so I will say it for you to the herballife lady – “Mind you own business and if you cannot say something nice to someone then do not say anything at all.”
I am so happy that you are having a wonderful time with your girls.
Thanks for making me laught everyday.
God Bless,
Susan
My dearest John, you truly are an amazing man. There is always a pax that refuses to do something , tells you that if you do not listen to them you will be gone in the next 5 seconds and any other number of things. For you not to tell all these people to go jump off the ship, is amazing. You do have the patience of a saint.
As far as the posters on CC that think they of all people know just what your staff should do, serve what they think is right or any number of things, tell them to bugger off. I know you won’t do that but I can. They do not deserve your attention or an answer from you but you are such a kind person that you do. It is those posters that give CC are really bad name and because of them a lot of poster, like myself, do not post there anymore.
Looking forward to more news of the Carnival Magic. It is hard to believe that in one year from today we will be flying to Barcelona and then three days later, board the fabulous Carnival Magic. Please share some of her news very soon. And please tell us about the Staterooms on the Carnival Magic. I am also looking forward to hearing about the excursions too.
Keep smiling John; you truly are one of the good guys.
My best to Heidi and Kye.
Peg Dunbar
Once again a Cruise Critic malcontent has to bastardize facts. Reading the entire thread one would find that the vast majority of people would be fine with children in the steak house. What many are opposed to are the parents who don’t have enough common decency to control the young ones who go ballistic with screaming and horrid antics.
People are entitled to their opinions. My opinion is that I hope I NEVER have to share the steakhouse with either Long Tall Sally or Flynlo. I suspect that Flynlo is a poser as most pilots have a significant amount of common sense… I don’t have any explaination for Long Tall Sally other than she’s just bitter. Neither one of them meets my standards for diner company.
Mr. and Mrs. Shapiro are brilliant. I wish I had been granted what those wonderful folks were.
As for Ms Herbalbutt, she can join the Bite Me Club as well. Inconsiderate and rude… no other way to describe her.
Safety briefing… Hummmm… I flew for the USAF for twenty years… thousands of hours… and before each and every mission we reviewed safety procedures. I’m baffled by people who have disdain for their own well being. File these people in the ‘twit’ category.
Stitch sends along her love to Heidi and Kye… any you, of course!!!
Ciao!!
Host Mach
At least you could spell dinner right. Diner is were you eat.
Perhaps you’ve never heard of a typo…sorry we can’t all be perfect Steveaaaaa
Criticizing somebody’s spelling. 2 cents, +/-.
Misspelling “where” in your critique. Priceless!
Awesome wojo!
Steveaaaaaa – “what goes around, comes around”, or so you can understand it better, “wat goes around, comes around”.
Steveaaaaaa ….You need to turn on your spellcheck
Vivienne,
The problem is spill chick doesn’t fine a weird that is spelt Wong butt is also a weird asp in
were, wear and where
BIG ED
John:
To bad you didn’t have one of your Bloggers, there by your side, to give that old “I lost 40 pounds” bat a reality check.
Because I (as a passenger who has no restrictions on what I say) would have commented….”so you lost 40 pounds and you are still that ugly….how sad.”
Want to lay any bets that you will have a comment card from a PASSENGER about being harassed before the end of the cruise?
Linda (Mom of your friend DJ)
John – PLEASE REPLY
Quite simply, the HerbaLife guest was WRONG – when you are eating, and particularly with your family, it is simply rude to interrupt someone and tell them they are fat. It matters not how big they are.
I realize that you are the CD and have to hold your tongue. Had she done something like that with me, I would have replied “and you are ugly” and left things at that.
STILL MTSFP
Skip the tea and pass the chocolate melting cake
John,
No one deserves to be treated the way you were by any of these Herbal-Lifed people. Her badge offered to tell you how, but she was soliciting on the ship. If some one had done that to me I would have kindly said, Thank you, but I’m not interested. If you were interested you would have asked. How rude and intrusive these people are! You are the utmost professional at all times, but doing this in front of anyone is downright embarrassing and no one has the right to do that to another human being!
Maybe you need to wear a badge that says “No, I’m not interested” just for this cruise. I think most people would completely understand where you’re coming from!
Hi John, You SHOULD Hve told the Person that she should respect your DOWNTIME to spend with YoUR Wife and Child. Love Your BLOG. C&C
Hello John and family (reply if you wish)
I can’t believe how nice you are John. Someone disrupts your family dinner to tell you to lose weight? And you didn’t put her off in PV??? My goodness you are a Saint!
I too couldn’t enter the Red Frog contest because I’m older than dirt and would have been happy to have been born after 1950. But no, my father came back after the war and….well, you get the idea. (g)
Being a Cruise Critic member, I have to say that I am ashamed at how a few of these people act. Nothing is going to change them, they are starfish trolls and are very happy to cause trouble. I have written to Gerry Cahill and have had return letters from him every time. Some about how good my cruises have been and just one about a recent disappointing cruise. He replies (well, his name is stamped on the letter) each time. And NO I did not ask for nor receive a discount, before anyone asks. Just some nice encouragement and saying that they would look into my….well, not complaints, just wondering what went wrong the last time.
Looking forward to seeing you on the Magic on her maiden voyage out of Galveston next year, if I work it right, it will be my 25th cruise. I’m working on that as we speak…LOL…I am a CCL addict and do not want nor need intervention…
Peaches, part of your Stalker Brigade…
Hi John,
ON your blog of Sept 22, you told us about a the incident with a Herbal Life Dealer. I to have been approached by them and this is what I told this rude lady, “Look I know that I am overweight and I am doing something about it. I have lost 175lbs and I will keep losing it, but I will tell you this, when someone approaches me rudely like you have, I really do have to tell you that it is none of your business.” or you could tell them, “Ma’am, please could we talk about this later since, I am having dinner with my wife and child. This is not the time or place to talk about this.” These are just my thoughts.
John, I know that many of us that are overweight can relate to what you are going through, but you must put your foot down about when and where they can talk to you about it.
Here is a saying that my brother told me when I would let people get to me. He would say “Don’t let the Turkey’s get you down”, so John, don’t let these few rude turkeys get you down, just hold your head high because you are doing something about your weight.
Take care my friend and please say Hi to Heidi and Kye.
From your #1 Bloggy Thinggy Fan
Kathy M.
Hi John! Stopped by to say hi to you and to let you know I really enjoyed todays videos!! I always feel like I am on the cruise when I get to see them. Thanks!
Does Long Tall Sally never quit? Gee Whiz.
I fail to see how my perfectly behaved 10 year old, and her equally polite 14 year old brother affect anyone else’s dinner. They have better table manners than many adults I have seen, and certainly would never be so rude as to claim someone else’s mere presence was enough to ruin their dinner.
Thank you, John for all that you do for your legions of fans. You are a true ambassador for the Carnival brand. And you’re hilarious as well.
You have far more class than I – if someone were rude enough to interrupt my dinner to tell me that I’m fat, they would likely be wearing my food and walk away with my fork stuck between their eyeballs. And my spoon in a more southerly orifice.
No matter what all of the rude people have to say, you are beautiful in your own unique way.
Hi John,
I have a couple of comments for you.
First, about the one bottle of wine per person rule. Maybe it could be changed depending on the length of the cruise. It doesn’t make much sense to me to allow one bottle for a three day cruise and the same for a 12 day cruise. Just a thought.
I think the Herbal Life lady was extremely rude. Instead of something to make you lose weight maybe they can come up with something to give her some manners.
Say Hi to Heidi and Kye for us.
George and Linda
I think that the ‘One bottle rule’, was created so that you could bring a special bottle on board for a special occasion. Something that is not available from Carnival’s wine cellar.
At least that was what I was always told.
Cheers!
Derek
Hello John et al,
Regarding the abusive passenger skipping the drill. YES you should put them off at the next port. There have been a few recenet reports of trouble from passengers . If the cruiseline were to take immediate corrective action, word would get around that proper behavior is expected.
You should have told that Herbal Getalife to get lost. You know they coordinated their group sailing for when you were on board just to harrass you. You have been approached more than a few times by this bunch.
Heck, Heidi could have told her to bugger off so that you would not be acting out of line as CD.
Phil & Liz
I’m so sorry John. How rude of that lady especially interrupting your dinner as she did. I think at that time, dinner time with your lovely family, you should be allowed some quiet time and enjoy time with Heidi and Kye. I just don’t understand some people. It seems people no longer show any respect. Cruise Director or not I would have asked for security and showed that lady the door to her cabin.
Thank you for those two wonderful videos. They were lovely and it shows me how happy you must be to have fantastic people on the ship each cruise you are on. Have a great evening my friend.
Paul F. Pietrangelo
John,
On December 11th you should be northbound to Los Angeles, heading for your Christmas vacation from a vacation of a job, and my wife and I will be southbound on the Spirit. So can you arrange a sail-by (at say 800 yards) so we can see what it is you want us to kiss? A mile away may be too far away…
John
p.s. – I hope this made you laugh. If not, laugh anyway and have a great vacation.
Those videos are priceless John!!!
One of my fondest wishes is to be able to take a cruise with you as the CD. Unfortunately, we have to book our cruises almost a year in advance, so I never know where you will be.
Our next is Carnival Legend (our favorite Fun Ship so far) in April 2011……perhaps I will get lucky this time ad you will be on board.
Keep up the awesome work, and from one fat guy to another……..tell the HerbalLife lady where to stuff her tea!!!!
Mike, John will be on our Carnival Magic a year from now! The TA from Barcelona is very affordable
. Check it out!
John:
I read your blog religiously, but never comment. Well not until I just read that story. The herbal life woman needs to go F… off. How incredibly rude can you be to assault you when you are trying to have dinner with your family. Weight is such a personal issue to people. Who is she to judge you. Even if she wants to judge you, who is she to confront you. CRAZY!!!
I have been on 4 carnival cruises and hope to cruise with you soon.
Take Care
My reply to those fat patrol busybodies, “Per my Dr I eat this way to stay alive and I don’t do MLM products”. Their book of answers does not have a reply to this.
We love the tea and the dining room dancers/waiters. Some folks need to find something to get upset about like GLOBAL WARMING, the death penalty, etc. But John’s blog? Hahaha, no worries.
Interesting comment about the tea from the Cruise Critic people. Personally, I happen to think that the iced tea on Carnival is outstanding. And, since I drink tea literally every day of my life…
And, I might add here that I find the dinner entertainment extremely fun. Going on my next cruise November 8th, sailing out of New Orleans on the Triumph. (This time as a Platinum member!!!) And, I am proud to say I achieved this status in 6 short years. I love Carnival (have sailed with others too and keep coming back to Carnival) and adore you John. I met you on the Baltic Sea cruise in August of 2008.
Without rambling on any more, just keep on doing what you are doing. It’s great.
I’m extremely picky about my tea and I love Carnival’s tea. Plus, they have crushed ice, which is my absolute favorite!
I don’t like Carnival’s iced tea either, although I often drink iced tea in land-based restaurants. Someone should do a taste test. I always drink water instead. BTW, I’m Platinum if it matters, and I love many other aspects of Carnival’s cruises.
Just back from the Carnival Legend. The ice tea was reeeeeaaaaaly dark and strong, which means you can put ice water in it or drink it just like that. It was great.
I drink ice tea every day. BTW, I’m Platinum if it matters (can’t imagine why it would).
Wow! I can’t believe the nerve of that HerbaLife lady! I would have told her where to place the stuff that she’s hawking
Thanks for doing what you do – May 2011 cannot come too soon! I may have to book a cruise for my husband and I on Splendour so that we can meet you before Europe!
No requests for ships on a stick, no requests for a special table at dinner (we do anytime and don’t really care where we sit)… just please keep on being the awesome and wonderful person that you are!
Hugs and kisses to you, Heidi, and Kye!
Susan
Sharecruises is one happy cruiser now. She can smoke n dance at the same time in the disco.
You go girl!!!
Mark my words.
Sharecruises will be spewing her anti smoking agenda here too. Gets really old on cruise critic.
Please Reply – Time Sensitive-ish – Saildate 10/30/10
Hello again John, you odd duck, you!
It’s been ages! Ok, that’s stretching the truth a bit…
It’s been WEEKS since I last wrote you to expound upon the greatness of the Dream TA and her Dream Team, to tell you how much you are appreciated (bunches!), and to see if you can whisper in the ear of a certain Maître d’ on the Dream to send an early request for a table for 4 with a view for my gang. My husband and I will be sailing on the 10/30 Halloween Cruise with two good friends who I just know would be thrilled to dine overlooking the water – we’re in 1365 and they’re in 2469. I’m hoping to surprise them with this small luxury. I don’t expect miracles; just hope we’ll have a better shot at an even lovelier dining experience than on previous trips. (And yes, for those of you who are peeking, I will be standing in line to request this personally at embarkation — I just hope John can help grease the wheels a little…)
We four are really looking forward to this vacation! My husband Aaron is giving it to me for 10 years together and 7 years of wedded bliss-i-ness (so sweet!!) and the other couple (Trevor and Reka) will be celebrating a 3rd Date-a-versary – so it’s going to be a nice festive week for our gang! Despite practically all of the Dream Team having moved on to other ships, for my husband and me it will still be like going home. We can’t wait to meet the new Dreamy Crew! And for our friends, the Dream will be a big happy surprise – they don’t have any idea how fabulous the ship truly is! Shhh – don’t tell. I want it to be a secret until they board!
=)
Anyway, that’s it. Thanks so much for all you do, John! You make us giggle and remind us every day how much we LOVE cruising with Carnival. Hope to sail with you again sometime soon. (I’d be happy to run interference for you with the complainers ) Hugs to Heidi and Kye… I’m so glad you’ve been enjoying time with your ladies. Your happiness at having them near is showing these days. Hopefully the next Heald family gathering will be very lengthy and very SOON!
Wish I was there!!
Carin
(a proud odd duck!)
PS – I think the ‘Odd Duck’ costume idea is absobloodylutely brilliant! You should do it!
Don’t listen to the herbal tea lady, I’m sure whe will have gained her 40 pounds back by the time she gets off the ship
I’ve been on the low carb diet so long that it is just a lifestyle now. I love it and it is so easy to stick to. Sure, when dessert time comes around it can be challenging but it is so worth it. I wish you much luck with it!
While I can’t find it now
, I’m sure there’s a rule against soliciting on a cruise ship. This should cover religious groups, HL groups and any other group trying to get people to join them!
More then a rule it is in the Contract:
8. COMPLIANCE WITH RULES, SOLICITATION, SMOKING, DRINKING, ILLEGAL ACTIVITY, SEARCHES
(a) Guest agrees during the course of the voyage to follow the directions of the ship’s Master, or his authorized officer. Guest further agrees not to solicit anyone on the vessel for any commercial or professional purposes. Guest agrees that any violation of this Clause may subject guest to disembarkation.
Sorry, I just can’t help myself.
This blog was right on John. If you want to be a soar puss either stay home and go to work or just stay in your stateroom. If you choose to share your negativisum with your fellow passangers just be sure you are not sharing with someone just as negative or you may just find yourself overboard.
My husband and I will be taking our first cruise on the Carnival Conquest on October 17th thru the 23rd. I have never been on a cruise and we did not get a honeymoon so this is the perfect vacation for our 5th anniversary. I am so excited about it that every evening when I get home from work I log onto the Carnival website just so I can see in writting how many days till our cruise. I love reading your blog it is not only very funny and insightfull but also informative for a first time cruiser. Thanks for sharing. Hope your enjoying your time with your girls.
Hi John, (please respond)
Thank you for taking your personaltime to write theis blog thingy. I enjoy reading your thoughts. I was alos a big fan of Benny Hill. He cracked me up.
One thing I wouldlike to know. I have no problem with children in the Steakhouse as long as they are behaved. I have heard though that the parents are bringing them in and bringing food from other areas to eat. Is this correct? It seems to me that all should be charged if they are occupying a chair. It could possibly keep paying customers out if they are just taking up space.
I will be sailing with yousoon but after you read this so here is hoping our time on the spendor will have benn awesome.
Best wishes.
Hey John,
Please reply, when it is convenient
Well, we finally did it. I just booked the Carnival Sensation for Dec 9, a week after our 20 anniversary. It has been three years, and we could not wait for Half Moon Cay, though we will try to go there next year.
My wife was looking over the CD schedule, and she was wondering what a Skippy is. She is worried about an over sized jar of peanut butter at the welcome aboard show.
Either way, it has been way too long, and we are so much looking forward to sailing again
Til next time
Kevin
I notice that the poll about children in the Steakhouse actually has the most votes for “I couldn’t care less”.
John, I love your blog thingy, and keep doing what you do!
Perhaps you should give that Herbal Life lady your “deep and sincere apologies” that she lost her 40 pounds and ask her if she has any idea where her money went. Perhaps she spent too much time in the casino?
I guarantee she’ll be a bit confused, and you will have to explain to her that in the UK, pounds are money, and weight is measured using the metric system.
I personally would tell her that if I wanted her advice about how to lose weight, I would ask her, and that if she didn’t f*** off and mind her own business, I would help her gain a few of those pounds back in the form of my foot up her a**.
Poser? Probably not, if you meant poser by flight time you would be wrong. Stating opinion just as you do. I as many believe children under 12 do not belong in steakhouse. Carnival and John do, they make the rules, we either live by them or go elsewhere. As for dinner with you, no thanks!
I don’t recall inviting you to dinner…
Have a great day!!!
Host Mach
“Sometimes there just isn’t enough vomit in the world.” What a great line! I’m totally going to steal that from you.
Love your blog thingy. Makes me laugh everyday!
Dear John,
Tell Herbal Life chick, “my sincerest apologies, but this is my family time and I am not interested in a sales pitch.”
I’m willing to support your cause, John. Please pass the ribs, chocolate cake, and ice cream!
Laura
John,
Too bad you didn’t rip off a long loud fart for the benefit of the herbal highness……then say, “I tried it, it gives me gas”. Loved Linda’s “you’re still ugly” comment. Just know we all love you just the way you are. Best wishes to you, Heidi and your precious Kye. Julie
Sadly the moron who skipped the safety drill would probably be the first to claw his way past all of the other passengers in a true emergency. I would put his ass off at the next stop.
As someone else mentioned, Herbalife lady is soliciting, both by wearing her “button”, i.e. advertisement, and by harassing you at dinner. I’d put her ass off as well.
The Watchtower comment made me LOL.
John (Please reply) – Time Sensitive
John asked that I send him a note with my cabin number and mark as “Time Sensitive”. I had already sent a note on Monday, but will re-post.
John, (Please reply)
I am hoping you can help me out. On October 14th I will have been married to my beautiful wife for 10 amazing years. I sometimes wonder how on Earth she has been able to put up with me for 10 minutes, much less 10 years.
Our honeymoon was spent on the remarkable Carnival Destiny out of San Juan and on October 18th, we will be taking our 7th cruise together and all on Carnival. I have booked a Suite on the Elation as a special gift to her.
We will be traveling with my very best friend of 22 years and his wife and my hope is you might be able to help us with a table for four by the window in one of the MDRs.
Our booking number is ______ and we are in cabin V5 and our friends’ booking number is ______ and are in cabin V3.
We are both avid followers of your blog and love to read about a day in the life of John Heald each and every morning. Give our best to Kye and Heidi and keep the wind at your back.
Sincerly,
Brady Steele
It is always amazing to see how rude people can be when they place themselves above others. Should have just told her to bugger off and mind her own business. I have had similar comments back when I was “too skinny”.
I’m so glad God didn’t make us all the same.
Quite honestly, the tea on the Lido deck and the tea in the dining room do taste different. The dining room tea is fine, but the tea on the Lido deck has that instant tea powder after taste. I just put more sugar in it….
If someone wants to vacation (or eat) where there are no kids, then they should choose a venue that is designed for that option. Our 11 year old has manners that enable me to take him absolutely anywhere. He is better behaved and mannered than most adults I run across. In any case, if someone is paying for their own meal and you are not, who are you to tell them where they can eat and with whom they can eat.
Your friend in Texas,
Larry Meador
John, thank you so much for the videos today! I was laughing so hard the dogs came to see what was up. I absolutely MUST talk hubby into a cruise on our Carnival Magic with you!
Please don’t let the haters and the busybodies get you down. I personally find the iced tea on our Carnival ships quite decent. There will always be people who are so miserable in their own lives that they must deliberately look for things to complain about to validate their misery. Poor folks.
My ex-mother-in-law was one of those Herbal-nuts. Perhaps that explains the “ex” in part. There’s no cure, alas, for stupidity or rudeness. Except maybe walking the plank….
Thanks again for getting my day off to a great start!
Amy
Hello John! Please Reply
My dear husband and I are cruising on the Spirit November 4th out of San Diego (Stateroom 4105). This will be our third cruise, and I just realized Ihave never attended the safety drill. The first cruise we missed it due to flight delays and the second we were hanging out in my Mother-in-laws cabin (she of the 20+ cruises) and she told us we didn’t need to go (just follow everyone else if something happens, she said). So, I am looking forward to my first safety drill.
This cruise is celebrating many things for us including our five year wedding anniversary and both of our birthdays. It is also our much-delayed honeymoon, since we didn’t get one when we married (we bought a house instead).
You can skip the table for two, because really what’s the fun in that? However, a little gift would be appreciated. This will also be the first cruise we have ever been on just the two of us, we have always cruised with a large group of family so I really don’t know what we are going to do on our own. (Okay, I have some ideas but this is a family blog, right?)
Much love to you and the girls, and keep up the good work on the bloggy thing and otherwise!
Long Tall and Rude Herbal CC’s:
http://themannersclub.com/main.htm?page_id=400
http://www.magnificentmanners.com/
http://www.luckydawgdaycare.com/adult_manners.html
Unfortunately there do not seem to be any classes designed for the fully grown rude adult. But the last link may at least keep you from whizzing on the carpet.
Some folks are attacking Carnival (and John) and giving CruiseCritic people a bad name by using it as their authoritative source. Makes me embarrassed to be a CruiseCritic member…
When will folks learn that using the comment cards at the end of the cruise and noting concerns at the Information Desk during the cruise are the best ways to get their concerns addressed?
I thought the fix for the Iced Tea was an easy one, now that it’s “Free” again.
Have the dancing waiter fill half with tea, and half with water, and you have a perfect tea brew.
Mr. Pete,
There NEVER was a charge for ice tea on Carnival ships. That is just one of those CC board things.
BIG Ed
You’re (spelled correctly) just not used to Pete’s sense of humour. He is well aware of the entomology of the Ice Tea incident.
Dear John,
My mom gave me your blog website and told me to check it out!! I had a couple of questions for ya!!
1) Me my husband and my parents were wondering where a couple of our past waiter staff were because they were truely wonderful and we would love to see them again!! It was when we were on the Carnival Conquest the week of 8-24-2008…their names were Romando (head waiter) Tatiana (assistant waiter) and Alex (bartender) I would travel to see these guys again they were truely wonderful!!
2) Me and my Husband and my parents leave going on the Carnival Triumph Oct 16, 2010 to celebrate mine and my husbands 1 year wedding anniversary and i was wondering if there was a place to buy the 24k plastic piece of ship on a stick..i dont know whats so speical about them but i think it would be awesome to have one!! And do you perhaps know who or CD will be?
Thank you so much hope to hear from ya soon!!
Tori Langford!!
Princess Barb of the Evil Crew,
I think all people born before 1950 should call the ACLU and ask them to file a class action lawsuit against Carnival. No one born before 1950 was allowed to enter the “coaster contest”. You had to select your year of birth on the contest entry form but the last one was “1950″. So if you were born before 1950 you could not enter.
I think we all should get a free cruise.
BIG Ed
Dear John:
I have been reading your blog for quite some time since we’ve been contemplating our first cruise as a family for the last couple of year.
We finally booked a Thanksgiving cruise on the Glory for this year. My 10 year old son turns 11 a couple of weeks before we sail who think he is too cool for the 9-11 year old group in Camp Carnival. His main interest is sports and he does tend to socialize with kids older than him. He was hoping to join Circle C instead and was dismayed when we saw that Carnival is strict about the age groups. He is absolutely convinced he is going to have a dreadful time on board and doesn’t want to go.
He perked up a bit when we decided to book a February sailing on the Inspiration with friends of our who have boys his age and a little older and it’s made him more open to the November trip with the family.
Sadly, I just learned that my job is being phased out at the end of this year. With the uncertainty that comes along with that prospect, it appears we’re going to have to cancel our plans to sail in February. My son is going to be sorely disappointed.
But, since we’ve already paid for the November cruise and it will likely be our last vacation for quite some time, we will be taking that cruise. Can you suggest ways in which we can make that trip a little more special for him on what will have to be a very limited onboard budget? Are there any exceptions re: age in Circle C?
Any thoughts would be appreciated.
Children ruin the steakhouse experience; really??? Judging from the recent behavior of the adults on the ship (complaining about the orphans using the slide for 40 minutes, shoving crew members when asked to attend the safety briefing, etc), I think children are better behaved!
My son (now 7) has been on 3 Carnival cruises. He orders from the ‘adult’ menu at dinner and uses his best manners. The drunken adults are far more disruptive, but we take our enjoyment from being together as a family. Carnival is a family cruise line, pure and simple. Good for you, John, for sticking up for multi-generational cruising families like us (Grandma and Grandpa are always with us when we cruise).
As far as the Herbal Life woman goes, her behavior is just plain obnoxious. If Herbal Life trains their reps to approach people this way, they should be ashamed. You could always use the standard, “No, gracias” since you are sailing to Mexico. It usually shuts the english speaking population right up.
The video of the couple married 71 years is priceless. My grandfather is 92 and very active. It is amazing what they can teach all of us young folk (as my grandmother would say if she were still alive). My grandfather says the secret (for men) to a happy marriage is two words…. “yes ma’am”.
Love you Blog, Keep up the good work.
Karen
John:
One thing you could have said to…
“…….a lady in her fifties ……… wearing an oversized badge that said “I lost 40 pounds, ask me how”
………………….
“I didn’t ask.”
Linda (Mom of your friend DJ)
John, in your position, you certainly can’t be rude (unfortunately). However, a teensy-weensy white lie should shut them up. Their products are loaded with soy, nuts, shellfish and caffeine. Just tell them you are deathly allergic to any/all of the known allergens in their products. Of course, that won’t solve the problem of their unmitigated gall, but it’s a polite way of shutting them up and moving them along.
As for your weight, you’re doing a great job. Losing weight the healthy way is a long, slow journey, or it should be if it’s going to be lasting. Keep it up, you’ll get to where you want to be. It’s the giving up part that causes failure
Suzanne
John,
New here to this blog maybe seen it a couple of times. I LOVE IT!!! I am very excited of taking a cruise with only my husband on the Dream in 63 more days yeah!! Love everything you do John!! I hear good tihings about Butch just from what I have read and I am looking forward of meeting him.
Thanks for all the laughs, John!!
To those mean people from CC (not all, but you know who you are) shame on you, you are just a sad, sad person who sits on blogs all day waitng for something bad to write!! You should be ashamed.
To the Herbal chick, You also need a lesson in manners!!
Have a great time with your girls, John!!
Babs
John:
Please reply.
I would like to suggest , unless you have a reason unbeknownst to us why you post the insulting comments, that you just don’t bother putting them in your blog. ( I don’t mean the complaints on service etc, I mean the personal attacks you receive.)
It is obvious to see that your real, true followers love you and love your humor and especially your family spirit. People like to hear about men that love their wives and families and involve themselves with their children. You have a lot of great qualities that we all enjoy.
It is just downright rude and insulting some of things people write and since it is your personal blog, you don’t have to subject yourself and Heidi to it. We all have flaws of one kind or another, why these people feel they are above others, I don’t know.
You don’t owe these creeps anything…just because your blog is open to the public doesn’t mean it is open to any of the ridicules that are thrown at you. I think as long as you keep posting the rude comments, people will keep sending them to you. Just like rude/loud people that like to be heard, I guess those on the internet like to be seen!
Keep up the good work and we”ll be seeing you on the Splendor on the 17th of October! We can’t wait!!
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John,
I LOVE the blog. It makes me laugh every day. I love the videos. They are fantastic. Please keep them coming!
Thank you so much for all you do!
Jenny
Hi John……My husband Jon (spelled correctly) and I are anxiously awaiting our January 16th 2011 cruise aboard the Valor with a few close friends from Jon’s Coast Guard days.
Did I say anxious………they have to secure me to the chair with Velcro, otherwise I am bouncing all over the room !!!!!
Haven’t cruised in over 15 years and never on Carnival…….we are Carnival Virgins.
Don’t know why we waited so long…….oh I remember………life just got in the way !!!
Well, now we have decided to do something special for ourselves. We will be celebrating our 14th Anniversary as part of this and celebrating good friends as another.
I am avidly reading every blog, review and comment I can to prepare ourselves for this much anticipated trip.
Just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your comments and the interest you take in all the ‘cruisers’…..isn’t that a type of PAMPERS ??
One thing we are interested in is the Chef’s table…but I don’t see it offered as yet on the Valor.
Will they be starting that program on the Valor before we cruise in January.??
Thanks John….(spelled correctly also)
Joani & Jon
Hi John,
I wanted to make a comment to you and let you know our party of 17 on the Splendor 9/12/10-9/19/10 had a wondering time for our first family cruise
(celebrating the In-Laws 40th) only one thing is why do they not allow babies to swim in the pools and play in the water park, when they are not potty trained?? My sister-in-law and I and many other parents we met on board were asked to remove the babies per not being potty trained. They were all wearing enviormentally safe SWIM diapers speifically made for the purpose of swimming. Im not sure if Carnival is aware of such new products for babies but they make them to hold any mess(es) perfectly and will not pose any harm to ppl or sea life. I was very dissapointed that they were unable to enjoy what I believe we payed for (use of pools) however I did undermind them and still took them to the water park, so they would not be too hot lol. Overall we had an amazing time! and btw you were very entertaining lol
Just wanted to let you know how muchiof an impact Carnival has had on my sons’s life. We almost never made our first cruise because of illness …
Jacob suffers a couple of potentially life-threatening illneses and fatal illness. He say ” Carnival made him feelnormal for the first time in his life”….
Most people sweat the small stuff……we just love all aspect of cruising on Carnival and are trying hard by my son’s request to make plantium by next year..
Anyway , Canadian Cystic fibrosis foundation published and article on Jacob , cruising, scuba diving and cystc fibrosis….
Thought you might enjoy especially after your kind words and landing us a spot at the Chef’s table for Miracle cruise over Christmas:
http://www.cysticfibrosis.ca/assets/files/pdf/CircleOfFriends_Fall2010E.pdf
Many thanks in many ways
Charleyann
Dear John,
As a returning customer I am extremely disappointed to learn that cigar smokers on the DREAM are to be treated as second class customers in regards to where they can enjoy their cigars. We are scheduled to sail the 22 of Nov and this news has dampened my enthusiasm for this particular cruise. Don’t fret, I also blame myself for not checking the situation out before I consented to the itinerary picked by my significant other; aka SWMBO. Are there any FIRM plans that the beards have approved and scheduled for rectifying the lack of a proper cigar bar atmosphere on the DREAM? I look forward to reading your reply on the blog