I don’t know much about my neighbour. I know his name is Frank and that he owns a chain of dry cleaning stores. I say hello to him when he is washing his Porsche which he does every Saturday morning at 9 am come rain or shine and he replies with a curt nod. I know his wife is even quieter than he is and Heidi says she hasn’t seen her for weeks.
Maybe he beat her to death with a bedside lamp and buried her under the rose bushes in his back garden. I am not sure why he doesn’t like me or maybe he is like this with everyone. One thing I do know for sure is that Frank, although he may be wife murderer and as grumpy an old sod as he is……..he absolutely loves Christmas.
As I sit here in my underpants across the way I am being stared at by six-foot festive snow globe that now sits in Frank’s front. Who the hell invents things like this? How did that conversation in the lab go?
Beard 1- “What shall we do today? Shall we invent a solar powered cruise ship, find a cure for hemorrhoids or come up with some sort of cheap arse snow globe with a Santa in it that will look stupid outside people’s houses at Christmas?”
Beard 2 – “Ooh. Ooh yes, yes. The globe, the globe. I’ll fetch the tinsel and the tofu.”
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind a Christmas light or two. I’d happily slow down to look at a tasteful white glow here or a splash of tree in a window there, but Frank’s house is sucking the electricity out of the rest of Essex. If you were to drive toward my house of an evening and then suddenly, as you round the corner, you would be blinded instantly. It’s like someone’s opened the gates of hell during Satan’s office Christmas party and let the contents pour forth all over the brickwork of suburban house.
I bet you could see his house from space. Honestly, it’s like he’s rushed down to Wal-Mart, gathered up armfuls of anything that glitters, rammed it all down a shoulder mounted missile launcher and then fired the whole lot at his house. There are hundreds of red, green, blue, purple and gold lights splattered all over the entire house……..it looks like Walt Disney has vomited over it.
He also has reindeer and a flashing Merry Christmas sign and for some reason, he has a huge blow up Santa’s using a mode of transport with which he’s not normally associated. On his roof he has Santa in a hot air balloon tied to his chimney
In exactly what version of the story of St. Nicholas did he bring presents on a sodding balloon? Is it because he’s trying to set a green example? It simply makes no practical sense because a balloon just wouldn’t be able to cope with the rigorous demands of travelling round the world in one night in the same way as a mystical sleigh pulled by flying reindeer. Santa would optimistically board his balloon with his sack of toys and then get only as far as Alaska to drop Sarah Palin her gift (a book entitled South Korea Good….North Korea Bad ) before bad weather would blow the fat man and his balloon all the way back to the North Pole………balloon my arse. I bet if I were to go to a posh place like Boca Raton or Beverly Hills they have Christmas lights that include Santa getting out of a Bentley. Yep, this year Frank has finally lost his mind and as soon as an opportunity arises I will sneak out and take a photo of this festive monstrosity.
Oh, and while I’m being a bit bar humbug can I also have one other Christmas moan, can people never send me one of those letters or e-mails that are copied and sent to everyone they have ever known in the form of what’s been happening this year? God I hate those……..”It’s been a busy year for the Jones family. In August, Molly, our youngest, got 12 A star passes in her SAT’s. Not bad for a two year old. Callum our middle one saved a surfer from being eaten by a great white shark by poking its eyes out with a pencil while Katie, who turned 10 in October, became the first person to skateboard up Mount Everest.”
Bah humbug.
Time for today’s Q and A……………..off we go.
Sandy & Steve D. Asked:
John (please reply)
Really enjoy your blog, makes our day. We were on the Dream (Stinking Creek) cruise in March & had a GREAT time.We will be on the Destiny November 29th, 2010.We are platinum & confirmed for early dining. Would it be possible to have a table for two? We are in Destiny cabin # 8116 Thanks in advance.
John Says:
Hello Sandy and Steve D,It’s funny how two simple words like “Stinking Creek” can bring back such clear memories….. that was one very funny man and he helped make for a fantastic cruise. I have just seen this now and have asked the maitre d on the Carnival Destiny to do his best to help you with your table request. Have a brilliant cruise and thanks so much for your loyalty to Carnival. Best wishes to you both
JohnLou Asked:
Hello John, (please reply)My husband and I spent two magnificent weeks on our Carnival Dream, ending 9/4/10. Our Carnival Dream truly is a dream! We were on deck 10 and Rodney was our cabin steward. We have never had a better one. He made us feel like family! We were disappointed that we had the same itinerary both weeks because of a hurricane, but we understood. Better safe than sorry!!
However, we do have a few comments–which we didn’t get to make because of no comment cards. Some one said they were coming by email, but we never got them. One of the sea days was a little turbulent and we went down to get some meclizine, and we were charged $3.29 for 4 tablets. Now, really! Isn’t that getting a little chinchy? We have been on 47 cruises of which 20 were on Carnival, and this was a first for us! A sign of more good things to come? I have made a hobby of collecting spoons from every cruise ship we go on, but we were told there was none on the Carnival Dream. Is there a good explanation for why there is none? I was very disappointed.
One other comment–I was shocked that there are no grab bars in the showers. We are not feeble yet (although we did celebrate 60 years of marriage this year), but we feel it would be a great asset to have something to hold on to when entering and exiting the shower, especially when the ship is a little rocky.
Lastly, we and our daughter and her husband are booked on the Carnival Miracle for 10/26 – 11/3/10. We are anticipating another wonderful Carnival cruise. And this time we will take our own Meclizine with us
We sailed with you on the Carnival Freedom in Europe 10/16 – 11/11/07 Would love to be able to sail with you again.
Thanks for all the good stuff you do—whether while in your underpants or fully dressed! Keep up the good work and keep smiling!Lou Yeakey
John Says:
Hello Lou Yeakey,Lets start with your comments. While I was on the Carnival Splendor we had a group of spoon collector’s sail and so I saw firsthand just how popular this pastime is. I am therefore very sorry that you didn’t get to buy one. I have seen them in inventory before so I can only guess that they had sold out and were waiting for further stock but that doesn’t help you does it? So let me say sorry for that again. I have sent your comment about the spoon to our VP in charge of that area. Now the subject of grab handles in the shower. I know some of our ships have them for sure and I do know that we have the staterooms that have handicapped facilities including grab handles so I will check and get back to you. Regarding the charge for seasick medicine, which most importantly I hope made you feel much better. We used to hand out complimentary seasick medicine but as you have seen that is no longer the case and we do indeed charge for this.
I am so glad you had fun and thanks for your understanding regarding the change of itinerary. Changing routes is never something we want to do but as you quite correctly said…….”safety first.” I will make sure that your stateroom Steward gets to see your comments of praise and thanks so much for making them. I also thank you for your kind words and for mentioning my underpants which, I hope didn’t make you feel ill when you typed that word.
I hope to see you soon.
Best wishes
JohnMarvin V Asked:
John, reply.No ice rink, no water show, no dinner theater, no new Broadway musical, no new amazing promenade, bad food, boring ships. That’s why I don’t cruise with Carnival but with Royal.
John Says:
Hello Marvin V,Not sure why you have written to this blog then. While I respect that you prefer to sail with someone else I think that it’s pretty silly to write to me to tell me so. Isn’t that like writing to ford complaining they don’t sell Chevy’s? Oh and by the way……..you might want to consider putting on a cup……….because I have a feeling your about to get a massive kick to the bollocks now by a few bloggers.
Best wishes
JohnJim and Holli Asked:
Hello John (PLEASE REPLY)We are very excited to be sailing on the Valor again in January. We sailed her this past December. It will be our 6th cruise. I am very proud to say each sailing we made a donation to a local charity i.e. schools in Jamaica, orphanage in Roatan, etc. My youngest daughter who is 8 years old just asked me who we are helping this trip. I have not even thought that far in advance! Do you have any suggestions? We are sailing to Belize, Roatan, Cayman Island and Cozumel.
We are so proud of our daughters and their desire to help others on vacation and here at home. Would it be possible to do something special for them on this cruise? A simple note from the CD would do.Thanks in advance,
HolliJohn Says:
Hello Jim and Holi,Thank you so very much for all your kindness. How wonderful that during your hard earned family vacation you take the time to think of those less fortunate. We have a very comprehensive charity program with orphanages in both Roatan and Belize and if you intend to so something there please let me know so I can help you organise this through the team on the Carnival Valor.
I would be honoured (spelt correctly) to send something to your girls as they obviously are vey special indeed for thinking of others. Please send me their names and cabin number as soon as possible. Thanks again and best wishes to you all.
John
CLAIRENYNY Asked:
Please reply
John,Smokers are animals. Why doesn’t Carnival put all the animals on one side of the boat so that they can smoke their cancer sticks without killing the rest of us. I am going on the Dream on November 20 and the reports I have read about Carnival and smoking may mean that this first Carnival experience is my last. I fail to understand why Carnival lags so far behind the rest of the cruise lines and still allows smokers to inflict their poison on everyone else.
I would be interested in reading your reasons why. I hope our cabin cleaner has made sure that there is absolutely no smell of smoke. We are in cabin 2471 so please instruct them. Put all the animals on one side means that they can all puff away on there balconies while those of us who appreciate life can breath properly. Smokers are killers even on cruises.
John Says:
Hello CLAIRENYNY,I am sure that you had a brilliant time on your Carnival Dream and my apologies for the late reply. There would have though been no need for me to contact your stateroom steward as whether people have smoked in the cabins or not all the staterooms are thoroughly cleaned before the next cruise starts. I am of the belief that we shouldn’t allow smoking in the cabins although I see no reason why people should not be allowed to smoke outside on their balconies as long as they are respectful to those either side of them. Most of the guest lounges and most of the casino you will have seen was smoke free and there is what we consider a good balance for both smokers and non smokers. I honestly don’t think that we would be able to manage and facilitate selling one side of the vessel as smoking and the other as not. It would make sense to do that but logistically I don’t think it’s something we will be doing. I hope that you had a great time and your Carnival Dream experience will not be your last.
Best wishes
JohnKaren Spencer Asked:
JOHN – PLEASE REPLYMy sister and I are going to be on the Carnival Magic Transatlantic next year for my {sigh} 50th birthday. I am beyond excited – this will be my 7th Carnival Cruise and my sister’s 10th. Do you know how much the Spa Pass for the cruise will be? Also, is there any possibility of a window table at the late dinner? I LOVE sitting by the window and seeing the ocean while having dinner! Thanks for your Blog Thingy – I read it every morning!
Karen
John Says:
Hello Karen Spencer,I am also excited as this will be my first trans-Atlantic crossing since Carnival Liberty. I am fairly certain your Carnival Magic Cloud 9 Spa pass will be the same as on your Carnival Magic at $35 a day with a special price for the entire cruise but I will confirm nearer the time. Please can you write back to me in August and I will make sure I do my best to get Ken the Maitre D to help you with your table request. Thanks for the kind words and I hope you continue to enjoy the blog
Best wishes,
JohnFred Asked:
Dear John (Please reply)I just wanted to write a quick note to tell you that I just came off a wonderful cruise on the Carnival Glory (7 days to New England/Canada).
I wanted to mention a few staff members who went well above and beyond to make our trip memorable. Wilson & “OT” (from the bar staff) and our cabin steward Lolito (we were in cabin 2217) were fantastic.
Thanks for your time John and I am looking forward to sailing with you next October on the Magic.
Fred
John Says:
Hello Fred,Thanks so much for taking the time to write about the crew members on the Carnival Glory who made such a difference to your cruise. I will now send this to the hotel director so he can personally show them. I look forward to seeing you next year on your Carnival Magic.
Best wishes,
JohnCarla & Jim Asked:
John please reply when you can.As always I would like to thank you for your continued efforts to keep us loyal Carnival cruisers informed as to what is happening. It is greatly appreciated. May I ask a question regarding the “future cruise certificates” – can you tell me why we are instructed to send them certified mail ($5 – $6) in order to redeem them. It seems that we should be able to scan and email them to Carnival (or to our PVP) when we want to redeem them since they have individual certificate numbers and there would be no way of duplicating them on more than one reservation. It is a bit nerve racking waiting to see if Carnival receives your certificate and if it gets applied to your reservation. I feel that with today’s technology this would be a step in the right direction.
I hope that you have a wonderful day!
John Says:
Hello Carla and Jim,I am afraid that my knowledge of these certificates is pretty basic…..a bit like Sara Palin’s knowledge of foreign affairs. Anyway, I know someone who does know and I will make sure that you are contacted straight away. I am sorry for the late reply to this and thanks so much for the kind words. By the way……..it seems to me that scanning them would make sense.
Best wishes to you both.
JohnIndyMichelle Asked:
Dear John, (please reply)Today’s blog is great timing, because I’ve just returned from my first ever solo cruise. I had a lovely time, but I don’t know that I would go by myself again. I was very lucky to have WONDERFUL table mates at dinner, including a mother and daughter pair who went out of their way to make me feel welcome and include me in many of their plans.
One suggestion I have is to improve the “singles meet” on the first evening. On the Carnival Inspiration, it was held at 11:30p in the disco. This was sort of “prime time” for that club anyway, so it was packed full of partygoers, and mingling / conversation was at a minimum. Maybe a smaller, quieter lounge would be a better spot?The party could always then move to the disco once introductions have been made. On a positive note, I’ve already emailed this to the beards, but will tell you as well. My dining team of Avy and Cris, both from the Philippines, was great! They are both the perfect balance of friendly and professional; I could not have asked for a better team. With the exception of one inexplicably cranky bartender, the entire Inspiration crew were as friendly and helpful as can be. Nearly everyone I passed would take the time to stop and greet me with a smile, it was really amazing! I also had a (relatively minor) medical issue while on board, and all of the nurses were friendly and helpful. I was a bit emotional at one point (combination of traveling alone and not feeling well), and Jaclyn from Australia took the extra few minutes to cheer me up. As I said, I don’t know that I will cruise alone again, but I will most definitely cruise again on Carnival. I’ll just have to increase my efforts to convince a friend to come with me and enjoy the fun!
Lastly, I was terribly sorry to hear about the crew member on the Splendor today, John. It’s a tragedy and my thoughts are with his family and friends.
-IndyMichelle
John Says:
Hello IndyMichelle,I always have the utmost respect fro single cruisers. I have a loathing of the table for one situation and so I can see how difficult cruising on your own may be. I was glad therefore to read that overall you had fun and were blessed with some great table mates that helped make your dinner times so special.
I will certainly pass your recommendations about the single gatherings along. I guess we onboard sometimes think of the single cruiser as the 18 -20 somethings, which is why the single parties are often held in the dance club. When I am onboard I always hold a second singles gathering for the thirty something onwards in the piano bar. To me this is the best location for this and with one of our great piano bar entertainers in charge it is often a great way for single cruisers to meet. However, I can see how lonely it can occasionally be for the single cruiser which is why I have the utmost respect for those who travel this way. Thanks so much for the praise you bestowed on our crew and I apologise as well for the “cranky bartender.” Anyway, I hope you do manage to persuade a friend to sail and that it’s not too long before we see you again. I will send your comments to the ship.
Best wishes,
JohnJudy Asked:
JOHN PLEASE REPLY!!!!I HAD to tell you about our cruise to Greece on NCL and what a bad ship it was!!! We went on the NCL GEM. The sights were great and shore excursions fine-its the ship! The buffet has the SAME menu EVERYDAY! No changes-same thing day in and out-the 2 dining rooms both have the same menus each day-you would think one would have different than the other but no-both same each day. The 24 hr one had the same menu EVERYDAY! No changes. The outdoors ones were like Carnivals-hamburgers-hot dogs etc. The rest were “speciality” restaurants costing 10 to 25.00 per person. The shows were horrible! They even had to show movies in there-no acts! Somehow sitting thru 45 min of someone trying to be Elton John was terrible!
There weren’t any activities on the ship that didn’t cost money! EVERYTHING had a price to do it. 5.00 a game to bowl, bingo prices start at 20.00 up to 50.00-the Wiii had a cost. No cooking demos or nothing. I was sooo bored! It’s the most I have EVER seen my room! The TV was terrible! It had 2 stations-BBC news and channel E and that was a tape that ran over and over and over each day! The rest were ship stuff. Movies were all Pay on Demand. I happened to be asked by what I thought was a floor manager about how I was enjoying myself-I proceeded to tell him how the ship sucked! About the activities etc-food too! He tried to tell me he used to work on RCCL before coming there and that they were the same-I asked him what did he do to get kicked off RCCL to end up on a suckie ship!! He turned out to be the cruise director! Mexican-couldn’t speak English hardly at all-swore alot and did a few “dirty” gestures on stage. Stuff you would NEVER do!!! Needless to say-we will never be on their ships again! We usually travel Carnival or Royal but neither had the itin we wanted. Glad I have a cruise planned in Feb on Carnival!!!!
We did get to go to Croatia, 8 Greek isles and Turkey, and Venice. My husband got to see what he wanted to see-me I had enough after a week!Just thought I’d tell you our experience the last 2 weeks!!! Take Care!!
John Says:
Hello Judy,I am so sorry you had such a bad experience on NCL but hopefully the stunning ports of call made up for it somewhat. I won’t comment on the onboard experience because not only was your brilliantly written post very clear but of course for me to shout “yipeeeeeeeeee” or “Freestyle my arse” would be unprofessional………..so I won’t. Seriously though I am so sorry that you didn’t have such a great time and I hope that when you cruise with Carnival again we will remind you of just why we are the most popular cruise line in the world.
Best wishes,
John
That’s all for today and back with more on Monday.
In 35 days time the Rose Parade will be broadcast live on ABC TV and I know many of you will be watching. I thought some of you might like to see a video of what will surely be……….the star float of the show.
And of course on Monday I will be in Miami. On Sunday I will say goodbye to the girls and fly to Miami where I will be met with a warm and friendly hug by the Miami Customs and Border Protection inspectors.
On Monday and Tuesday I have meetings with beards about the bloggers cruise and with that in mind it is time to do another roll call and regardless of if you booked with the fare code or not it is very important that you tell us that you want to be part of the group. Now to explain what to do we need to have Eric explain this to you. Who’s Eric? I hear you cry. Well…..let’s find out shall we…..here he is.
Eric, please tell us about your background, where are you from and how your journey brought you to Carnival.
In an attempt not to bore all of you to death (and ruin my first impression as the new bearded fellow), I’ll make this first part short and sweet. 
I was born in San Francisco, California, but consider myself a Florida native, since I’ve lived here since the wee age of 4. Since moving here, I’ve lived all over the state, first growing up in South Florida, then moving to Orlando for school (Go Knights!), and most recently living in Sarasota, Fla., while working as the Social Media Manager for Clickbooth,
So how did I wind up in this crazy world we call Social Media? Well, my story actually begins in a place you may not expect. I first got involved in Social Media back in early 2002, to help increase the exposure and online presence of the rock band I was in (I’m a drummer, in case you were wondering ). When sites like MySpace, Purevolume, and later on Facebook came about, I immediately saw how powerful those platforms could be in helping bands connect and engage with fans all over the world on a whole new level, and I immediately took advantage of it. Utilizing those platforms, I was not only able to build great relationships with our current fans, as well as prospective fans from all over the world (many of which I still talk to til this day), but also sell a TON of records.
Since then, I’ve used the same model and approach to help both small and large businesses all over the country utilize Social Media to connect and engage with their customers, expand their marketing reach, improve their all-around customer experience and service…..and most importantly, increase sales and revenue.
Social Media is something I’m extremely passionate about and being able to do what I love for a company I’ve loved and respected for as long as I can remember is truly a dream come true. Plus, now I get to grow a beard… which is pretty sweet if you ask me.
What does your job here at the world’s most popular cruise line involve?
Since Social Media touches many different facets of the Carnival brand, from marketing support to customer service, and even internal communications, there are a lot of different areas I will be involved in as time goes on. However, some of the main initiatives I’m currently focusing on include: accelerating the growth and user engagement of our biggest social properties (such as Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Funville etc.), finding new and innovative ways to integrate Social Media into our overall marketing funnel, and of course working with John very closely as we start implementing some exciting new features and ideas for the blog for 2011 and beyond (but more on that below.)
Do you have any plans for our blog and our Facebook page things?
Of course! There are a ton of exciting new things that myself, Everett, and the 344 Stephanies have planned for both the blog and Facebook thingy. While most of it is EXTREMELY top secret (not even Funship Freddy or PA 007 know… well at least I think PA 007 doesn’t know, but no one here seems to know who he/she is), I CAN say that our new plans will bring more of the personality we all know and love about John to his social media thingies. More importantly, our plans also include a variety of new tools and features that will help expand the reach of both the blog and his Facebook, so that John can continue to entertain and touch the hearts of even more people on a daily basis. With that said, if you have any ideas you would love to see implemented on either the blog or Facebook, feel free to email me at SocialNetworking@carnival.com any time. I would love to hear them!
Do you like tofu? Believe it or not, Tofu is one food I have yet to try. Am I missing out?
Favourite Music: I love almost every genre of music except country . Some of my favorites include: The Beatles, Michael Jackson, Led Zeppelin, Bob Marley, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Incubus, Jay-Z, Eminem and a slew of others. I’m also a big advocate of local music, and I try and support the local music scene as much as possible. Some of my favorite local bands are: No More Kings, Aranda, Soular, and Bushwood.
Favourite Movie: One of my favorite comedies of all time is Dumb and Dumber. If we are talking about Action, then I would pick Boondock Saints, hands down
Mac or PC: I got a Mac 3 years ago and you know what they say: once you go Mac, you never go back. Also — hey John, you’ll love this — I’m currently considering an eyePhone!
And now that we know more about the man who is going to keep this blog and our FB page alive and kicking, make sure you tune in Monday when Eric will share exactly how roll call for BC4 will work.
I am really excited about BC4 and I will tell you all about what I have planned next week as well.
Now, let’s meet someone else as we continue our look at some of the brilliant piano bar entertainers. Today we head on over to the Carnival Legend and meet Roger.
Here is what Cruise Director Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee Jimmy has to say about Roger.
Name: Roger C Concepcion
Hometown: Malolos, Bulacan Phillippines
Bio: Roger joined Carnival in 2002 as guitarist and singer in a lounge band. He made the switch to piano bar entertainer 4 contracts ago. Roger’s style ranges from easy listening to modern rock. He usually starts the night playing soft music. When the crowd loosens up and starts to sign along, Roger picks up the pace. He focuses on playing any and all requests thrown at him. He is never pushy or obnoxious. He is simply a talented musician and entertainer.
Most requested song: Piano Man, Sweet Caroline and a few songs by Journey.
Best Part of being a Carnival Piano Bar entertainer: Roger feels the best part is when guests react to a particular song. Sometimes guests cry, laugh, sing a long, or just feel happy in response to hearing their favorite song. When guests tell Roger that he made their cruise or want to take a photo with him it just gives him more satisfaction and drive to do his best each cruise.
I hope you are enjoying these interviews and I will feature more soon.
I also know that my Smoke on the Water blogs had close to 500,000 views in one week. Since then many of the people who joined us for the story have buggered off but many have stayed as well. I know this because we still averaged 20,000 views a day this last week and therefore although some of you may have joined during the difficult times I wanted to say a huge thank you for staying with us. The idea of this blog is to provide you with fun and information and when I am onboard a close look behind the scenes at the life of a 45 year old fat, bent-toothed and cruise director…….and his underpants. If there is anything you need from me please contact me on the blog with a post marked JOHN PLEASE REPLY and as soon as I can …….I will.
So thanks again for joining us here on our blog thingy dedicated to you and Carnival…………the world’s most……………well ………….you know.
I am really waffling today……..have you noticed? Anyway, I spoke to Chris our entertainment director just now and he has nearly……..nearly finished the CD schedule for the first half of 2011. Obviously a lot of you are waiting for this and it should be ready very soon and as soon as it is I will be posting it here. I have to find a ship for myself before the Bloggers cruise. I intend as just mentioned to be on the Carnival Splendor for her January 16th cruise and then I have to find a ship before BC4 on the Carnival Glory. I am thinking of the Carnival Miracle…..Carnival Freedom ………..or Carnival Ecstasy. I will let you know.
Well yesterday why my American friends were stuffing themselves full of turkey and pumpkin pie I had a family day with Heidi and Kye. Now originally we were supposed to go to some kids petting farm but because it was so sodding cold and because I didn’t fancy Kye having her hand bitten off by a rabid Shetland pony we decided to go to the circus. Yep……the circus was in town …….the Moscow Touring Circus to be precise and so off we went. Now I had been to a circus in the American Airlines Arena ……home of the Miami Heat who we shall not mention except to say things will get better.
Anyway , that circus was both lavish and professional and spectacular while the one me and the girls saw yesterday…………ummmm…………..wasn’t.
When I was a kid we always went to the circus as a special treat. I don’t remember much about them except the clowns…….I hated the clowns………..they scared me and made me wet my bed. My Mum said it wasn’t the clown’s fault and that as much as they scared me it wasn’t normal for a 17 year old to be peeing in the bed…………..I still hate clowns to this day. I also remember a little about there being animals at the circus. I certainly remember the news some years ago that the British government had banned most circuses from having animals in them because someone was rude to a monkey or something. This probably was a good idea I am sure.
So I was surprised yesterday to see that the Moscow circus had animals……loads of them. Now the animal lovers and I are not normally in agreement as I believe it is every animals divine right to end up on my plate surrounded by a mountain of fries. However, I have always hated cruelty to…….well……anything and what I saw yesterday seemed cruel. First of all there were tigers who were so lethargic that if someone had gone up to them and attached a clamp to their bollocks they wouldn’t have even growl. Now I have no proof to back this up but to me it looked like either these tigers had been fed something….ummmm……soothing…………or these were Jamaican tigers.
The elephants looked like they had eaten their own dung and as they trotted around in a circle holding each others tails I felt desperately sorry for them and I felt very sorry for myself as I had paid £25 for the three of us to see this. I guess I saw the word “Moscow” and had hoped that there would be a few Latvian showgirls. But there wasn’t.
There was though two dwarfs juggling chainsaws and a couple called the Romanoffs. Mr Romanoff spent 20 minutes standing on one leg while balancing Mrs Romanoff on his nose ……………… that would have been good once ………but he did it over and over again. The finale was when he changed from standing on his left leg to his right leg.
Then there was the tightrope walker. Now I understand that taking your pants off on a tightrope suspended 50 feet in the air is amazing………..I can’t even take my pants off in the bathroom when I am desperate for a poo with out falling over. However, as he walked across the rope which was so high up that none of us could see that it was probably 4 feet wide I couldn’t help but think of some of the acts we used to have back in the old days at Carnival. they wouldn’t have been out of place in a circus and most were sodding better…….much better than the Moscow Crapov Circus I saw yesterday.
One of my all time favourites was a chap called Robert. He worked on our ships for many years and his strength and agility made him one of our most popular acts……..ever. Here he is back in the old, old days as a young man performing on a ship. Have a look at this and wait until you see his finale with the champagne bottle
Robert was always the CD’s first choice of entertainers and Robert and I brought out the Carnival Sensation, Carnival Imagination and Carnival Destiny together. Hailing from Australia I can honestly say that Robert was one of the most sincere and caring blokes I have ever met and he was very very funny. He probably still is but I am sad to say that after he and Vicky returned to Aussie we lost touch. However, he is still performing as you will see from this video. Here they are in Australia’s Got Talent.
During his time with me he met, fell in love and married one of the most beautiful dancers I have ever seen. Her name is Vicky and here they are
Robert is only four years younger than me…….and still has a body like that…….the bastard. I wish he and Vicky much success and hope one day we can persuade them to return for an encore performance with Carnival. Do any of you remember Robert the Great Excelsior?
Of course there were other great acts as well. Here are some of my other favourite.
JEAN CLAUDE – A foot juggler who despite having the handicap of being French was a brilliantly talented performer. His show featured his partner Heidi and his two little dummies – Mike and Tony who would have the audience in stitches. He was a great act who entertained Carnival audiences for many many years. I understand he is home in France relaxing and eating horse.
MANUEL ZUNIGA – I am sure many of you know Manuel and will have seen him or his nephews Manuel Jr and Victor. It was Manuel who set the scene for many of the acts these days and a double bill of Robert the Great Excelsior and Manuel Zuniga was what every CD dreamt about having. The Zunigas are still with us today and if you see the Zuniga name you will be guaranteed astounding juggling skills…………….and jokes about Taco Bell.
Of course for every Robert, Manuel and Jean-Claude there was an act in the old days that was quite simply dreadful. The one that sticks out to me was onboard the Holiday where I was a social host at the time and Gary Hunter was the incomparable cruise director.
The Wing Brothers were two Chinese plate spinners who had an incredible show. They erected poles on stage and to stirring classical music would spin plates on top of ten feet poles …… on a moving cruise ship. The audience sat with their mouths open right up until the point where the plates stopped spinning but stayed on top of the poles. That was probably because the plates had a hole the size of a Yak’s anus in them………it was their one and only performance with Carnival.
Anyway, that’s all for today. I will write from my hotel in Miami on Monday. I am flying with Virgin……….I hope they go all the way
Goodnight
Your friend
John
Look, friends — there are a few things you should remember before you comment. The space below is for you to post your comments about the post I've just written above. If it is something that's unrelated, please use the Ask John tab above. Now, while I may not be able to reply to your comment below, I do sit in my underpants almost every morning and read everything that is here. So feel free to comment on the comments and then if someone wants to comment on the comment to the comment then go ahead as well. Please be courteous unless the poster is French...........then you can say whatever you want.
Animals, & Killers ????? Because we smoke???? Wonder how you would explain rapists, beaters & drunk drivers !!!!! DON”T cruise on Carnival, it’s as easy as that !!!! Small minds, “I tell Ya” !!!
Hi John,
i think i can see Franks house at night all the way from my house on Canvey Island. Although my name is Frank i have no Christmas Decorations out, and my Porsche is just a VW.
Have a save flight,
cheers,
Frank. (Freedom B2B in Oct)
lol, I think it’s absolutely hilaroius and a show of stupidity that someone would complain because of not having an ice rink, water show, or dinner theatur. If he wanted that he should have made a trip to New York city and then head to Sea World for the water show. lol, Ice skating while in the Bahama’s just what people want to do.
Hi John, I totally agree about those people who put all the Christmas crap on their front yards. They take a nice house and make it look like a French whore. Talk about pagan woshiping. Ugh. I always want to call the Christmas police and report them. Then they leave the stuff out there until spring.
Jo
Hi, John,
this kind of neighbour ?
i like this, but not in my window
Denis
Just love it.
Maybe Frank will get the idea.
BIG Ed
Hello John! I just thought I’d share a cute experience..
We sailed with you on the Freedom in August 2009, and you made quite an impression on my kids. In fact, my daughter Rayna was called up on stage for your opening night show. I have you as a friend on Facebook to keep up with your travels and brilliant wit.
Needless to say, the whole world learned of the Splendor incident, and when it happened, I told my kids that you were the cruise director. The first thing BOTH kids said, almost in unison: JOHN TOILET?!
Their little memories, bless their hearts, must be very good…I don’t recall you talking too much about toilets on our trip, but something connected YOU to IT for them!
Anyway, we are sailing on a 6 night cruise on the Liberty on 12/18, and we can only hope we have someone as entertaining as you for the kiddies to remember!
Fondly,
Stacy
John,
All I have to say is “Carnival Ecstasy” Please, pretty please!!!!!
John,
Thanks for letting us meet Eric. We live in Sarasota, Florida so it was great to read his bio. Keep up the good work and have a great holiday!
Eric,
My son AJ is a drummer at Riverview high and UCF is one of the colleges he is applying to. It is a small world!
Stephanie
JOHN! As for the Christmas lites-theres a guy here in Michigan that couldn’t just stay in his yard with lights-NOOO he has 14 houses all light up!!! They play music and flash in time to it-bells goingoff etc! Be thankful you don’t live by him!
As for being COLD! Its in the TEENS here in Michigan!!!! At least you get to go to Miami!!!
Say HI to Jackie Spiers for me!!!!
Hi John-
We were on the Valor with you in March of 2009. Remeber Willie Banger? You were great! I started reading your blog during the Splendor ordeal and have read it everyday since…very entertaining. I just read you are thinking about the Freedom in January…I hope you will be on board her for the 1/23 sailing. This will be our fourth Carnival cruise and while we enjoyed all of the CD’s, you are by far the best and we would love to cruise with you again.
Hope to see you in January!
Mike
“Not sure why you have written to this blog then. While I respect that you prefer to sail with someone else I think that it’s pretty silly to write to me to tell me so. Isn’t that like writing to ford complaining they don’t sell Chevy’s? Oh and by the way……..you might want to consider putting on a cup……….because I have a feeling your about to get a massive kick to the bollocks now by a few bloggers.”
LMAO@John…That guy MUST be Sadistic OMG LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Marvin V ,
You can take your Mall of the seas and stick it were the sun don’t shine. If you don’t know what I mean just stick it up your arse.
If I wanted to do the things you mentioned I would just take a land based vacation in any big city. When I go on a cruise I want to do cruise type activities on the ship.
BIG Ed
Lover of Carnival CRUISES ships.
Hater of shopping malls and BIG cities.
“…Smokers are animals.” JOHN You Let that A$$H$$$$ call me an animal!!!Im shocked and appalled…….
Sandra
NB,Canada(The Great White North)….Bon Nuit
John (no need to reply),
I think Frank might be related to Clark Griswold; have you seen the movie National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (w/Chevy Chase)?
To Marvin V, here’s your first kick to the bollocks (hopefully, you forgot your cup). Go back to your Monstrosity of the Seas. We loyal Carnival cruisers prefer to feel like we are actually on cruiseship, where you can actually see the ocean from the ship. If we wanted to sail on a mall (with a Starbucks, no less) we’d sail RCCL. At least as an RCCL troll, you had the courage to show yourself, instead of just bashing Carnival. After RCCL goes bankrupt because of the massive amout of debt, even Carnival won’t bail them out….to much debt.
To ClaireNYNY- your posting was way too harsh. There are many non-smokers who have family and/or friends trying to beat the nicotine additiction, so you need to be a little more understanding. IMHO, Carnival does a good job balancing the smoker/non-smoker issue (although I agree with John Heald that I think Carnival should ban smoking in the staterooms. Balconies are o.k., but no smoking in staterooms; fire hazard).
Judy – thanks for the report on the NCL Gem. Should of done the Carnival Dream for Croatia & Venice (like us
. Anyway, interesting what the CD said about RCCL as well. Are you listening Marvin V?
John, hope you had some great quality and relaxation time with your family….you deserve it after the Carnival Splendor incident. Have a great flight back “across the pond” on Virgin, however, if you are paying for this “all the way” service, shouldn’t the airline be named Hooker?
All the best and a very happy start to the Holiday (dare I say, Christmas) season!
Marty (& Jeanne) Paul
Marty,
As a smoker I thank you. But I think it is much more safer smoking in my cabin under a smoke detector and a sprinkler head. On the balcony the wind is always blowing your hot ashes off your cigerettes. When out on the balcony I even put water in the bottom of my ashtray just to keep the ashes from blowing around. When on the Lido I try to move to a wind protected spot to have a smoke.
BIG Ed
I like where the engineers at the nuclear reactor have to engage the auxillary power to keep Clark W. Griswolds neighboorhood lit!
CLAIRENYNY,
Smokers are not the animals. The non-smokers that come into the areas that are smoking areas are the DUMP animals. Like animals they can’t read to know where it’s non-smoking. Wags their arms, like a cow wags it’s tail, fanning their faces. Sound like frogs clearing their throat to be rude. Running like a cheetah because they saw a smoker 50 feet away. Burying their head in to sand like an ostrich because they think if they smell one wiff of smoke their going to get lung cancer.
BIG Ed
ClaireNYNY – I am a non-smoker and it is people like you that give all of us a bad name. You had no right to call smokers “animals”.
Marvin- go crawl back into your hole…
Claire-
Pretty sure if you read Big Ed’s comment is starts off with ‘Smokers are not the animals’ He’s saying ot’s the non-smokers who go into the designated smoking areas and then complain that there is smoking on board…just want to make sure you are reading his post correctly because Big Ed is awesome.
Oops!!! Sorry Marsha!!! Guess I was the one not paying attention!!!!! I agree w/ you wholeheartedly!!!
such a funny blog, thanks john.
Safe journey, i must pop by and have a look at your neighbours xmas decor sounds fantastic (not)
hi to heidi and kye
michelle
John, I would like to take this time to thank you for responding to my wifes comment back in the summer.We went on the Liberty from Sept.25th-Oct.2ndm She asked tou if you.could get us a window seat in the aft of the dining room. Thank You for hav ing that table reserved for us. We celebrated our 12th year Anniversary. We had a wonderful time. Hope to C U in Feb. On the glory.Charles&Traci Sanner
HAPPY SOMETHING!!
I can’t wish you a Happy Thanksgiving because 1.) I’m too late for that, and 2.) You don’t celebrate it in England, do you? Maybe you do, come to think of it. You all might be really thankful that our US forefathers made it through that first winter without sailing back to England! If they had, we’d be living amongst you!!!
Never mind that though, I am in a holiday mood and Thanksgiving is over, so I just wanted to wish you a HAPPY SOMETHING!!
By the way, those people who come to your blog just to talk crap about Carnival really should at LEAST learn to use proper English (their, there, they’re.)
You ROCK!
Brenda, again
Marvin V Asked:
No ice rink, no water show, no dinner theater, no new Broadway musical, no new amazing promenade, bad food, boring ships. That’s why I don’t cruise with Carnival but with Royal
Dear Marvin, I find your post kind of funny as those are the some of the exact same reasons I DO CRUISE ON CARNIVAL! NO Ice Rink, NO Rock Climbing Wall, NO Neighborhoods, NO charging me for a hamburg at the Grill, NO Charging me for Room Service at ANY hour of the day. I find the shows on Carnival wonderful, the Decor bright and cheerful and the food is great. I LOVE the 24 hr pizza and ice cream again for free. And Carnival employees are some of the best people we’ve ever met. And yes we have Cruised RCI and yes we do travel a lot. Each to his or her own. Happy Sailing!
Marvin V said: ” No ice rink, no water show, no dinner theater, no new Broadway musical, no new amazing promenade, bad food, boring ships. That’s why I don’t cruise with Carnival but with Royal.”
Interesting… no ice rink, no water show, no dinner theater, no new broadway musical, no ‘amazing’ promenade are all reasons I DO sail on Carnival. I can find all that crap in the local mall. Oooo… a mall! Wow… that sounds familiar… Mall of the Seas. Regarding the food, when I was on the Blogger’s cruise an entire panel of travel writers said that Carnival had better food than RCCL. I guess their taste buds aren’t as refined as yours. Pity. Boring ships?? Beauty, my friend, is in the eye of the beholder.
CARNIVAL ECSTASY, JOHN. SHE’S WON THE CRYSTAL EAGLE SIX TIMES! YOU NEED TO EXPERIENCE THAT SHIP AND CREW!!!
Regarding the Rose Parade thingy… where’s our float? C’mon!! We want a float!!!
All the best to you and the girls. Stitch sends her love!
Ciao!
Host Mach
Hi John. Tell Lou that he could purchase a suction grab bar that he could use in any smooth wall shower, either at home or take it with him on a cruise. He could buy one at a medical supply store and even some drug stores have them.
Marvin V , you are an arse. You must like to cruise on the extra large garbage can of the sea without seeing water until you get to the piers and enjoying your week walking through a mall which I can do any day of the week.
You said ” I am thinking of the Carnival Miracle…” as one of the ships you might be on, please choose the Carnival Miracle in January 22, the 8 day cruise because once again Mary Lou and I will be able to see you on your birthday. Last January, on the Carnival Dream we had an opportunity to sit for awhile with you and give our card and gift so it would be wonderful to once again sit and give you our card and gift again. ( I’ve never seen you do act in action and we would love to see you in action )
If not, maybe some day. Say hi to Heidi and Kye from Mary Lou and I.
Paul F. Pietrangelo
Yes John, please join us on the Miracle on 1/22. Hubby and I will be there as well!
And ditto what Paul said to Marvin…He needs to crawl back under whatever rock he came out from!
I vote for the Miracle Jan.22 also. Great itinerary, & both my sister Gig & I will be glad to see you again.
Joyce
I love seeing the beautiful lights at
Christmas and appreciate the effort it takes to decorate to that extent. I agree however that Santa in a balloon is going a bit far.
Marvin V: Was there a purpose to your visit or do you randomly drop by blogs to show what an idiot you are? It is obvious that you have never cruised Carnival ship…and thanks for dropping by.
ClaireNYNY: I have seen chimps smoke in commercials and movies but you are a bit out of line calling smokers animals. If you are so against it why not cruise where you are sure you won’t encounter smokers…..you can’t find one is my guess.
Have a safe trip John.
John,
You mentioned that you are considering the Ecstacy….. well, I have wonderful memories of my very first cruise with YOU on the Ecstacy in October of 1992 – which happened to be my honeymoon!
Well, 18 years later, and 11 cruises later…. we would love to visit her again…. and if you were the Cruise Director that would be icing on the cake!
Good Luck in your decision!
Catrin
John excuse me while I speak to the latest RCCL troll
@Marvin V
I don’t know why you RCCL trolls take up your time writing to John about all of the things you like about RCCL and dislike about Carnival. You must know by now that there isn’t a single one of us that cares a hill of beans about your opinion about Carnival and how much you love RCCL. Why do you even bother to read John’s blog.?
I also don’t know why John continues to publish your comments. If your comments were on paper, i’d put them in my bathroom and wipe my “arse’ on them. So best thing to do is ignore them when John deems fit to publish them on his blog.
So now why don’t you go sail with your mall of the seas and climb a wall.
I’ll go start getting our things together to take our B2B cruise which will make us 22 cruises on Carnival……………we have enjoyed each and eveyone of them. If I want to shop the mall is 7.8 miles from my house. All it costs for me to go shop is the gas it takes to drive 15.6 miles round trip in my car.
So I’ll continue to go Carnival and enjoy the food, the entertainment, etc and if I want to go to the mall I’ll drive up the road.
Carolyn
Thank you Carolyn. Couldn’t have said it better, so I won’t even try! – Denise
Seconding all of your comments. Why do people still come to John’s blog to complain–obviously most of us here love John,his Blog, and all of Carnival’s ships! I agree that I could care less to go the the “Mall” on the seas–. I have tried NCL–but would never go back–it’s just Carnival for me! Soon to be my 12th one!
Well said!
Well Said Indeed! But I take exception with one item: I mean isn’t TROLL a bit kind? I think Pond Scum might be more appropriate. And btw, isn’t it RCCL that is abandoning us “left coasters” because they can make more money in the Caribbean and Europe? Thank you Carnival for hanging in there with us “poor” westerners!
Why all the bashing? We have been on over 35 cruises beginning in 1985. We LOVE Carnival and sailed most recently on the Fantasy last month. Carnival is laid back and FUN! However we also love RCCL and all it’s glitz. We also love NCL. Nobody does freestyle dining like them. We love Cunard. We love Princess. We love HAL. We loved a lot of now-defunct lines. We also love land-based vacations. There is room for lots of different styles. They are all great in their own way!
I believe the the RCCL trolls are jealous. They wish they could participate in all the fun. They wish they had someone like John, with whom they could commune.
p.s. Don’t feed the trolls!
Well said…
While it’s true Carnival doesn’t have ice rinks, climbing walls, dinner shows, etc….if you are going on a cruise for that entertainment then why go ? I have an ice rink called “outdoors”..it’s free. Water shows ? it’s called a lake, pond or even your bathtub…again free. Try it, you may like it.
John I just want to say that on the Carnival Dream when we was on it that the only place I seen people smoking was in the piano bar. The Carnival Dream was great and we are sailing on it again in May 2011. Can’t wait.
John, I hope this finds you a little rested after your Splendor cruise (although I would have happily taken that cruise). I wrote to you a while back for a request on our 01/29/2011 Destiny cruise. This is the reminder that you asked for. We would like a table for 2 due to us celebrating our anniversary during this cruise. And if it would not be too much trouble could you PLEASE provide a ship on a stick for my cruise addicted 8 year old who is not happy about being left at home? Our room is 7155. Thank you so much for all you do for all of us Carnival addicts!
Dear John,
Terrific blog today…….hoping you get out to take a short video of your neighbors LIGHT DISPLAY one evening, before or after your Virgin flight to Miami. That Virgin will “go all the way baby” you know Sir Richard wouldn’t stand for anything less.
Can hardly wait to hear of some of the BC4 plans. I’m now bringing my 61 y/o cousin with us…..he’s getting excited and has NEVER been on a cruise….he even has an “honorary” membership in Big Ed’s Evil Crew……..Big Ed said he hoped we didn’t “corrupt” him…..he’s MY cousin, do you think that’s possible? LOL
Loved the videos of Robert & Vicky. Not to worry, your acrobatics are almost as fantastic…..just think of what “Mary” puts you through during your infamous “Bedtime Story” every week. The way you’re losing weight it won’t be long until you can perform side-by-side with them.
Have safe flights John and have a tofu-snack with Eric “the bearded one” while you’re in Miami ….Eric, no one believes you haven’t had tofu. It’s well known that all rock drummers love IT. BTW Eric, thank you for the updates while John was busy on the Splendor. You are appreciated……why don’t you come along on BC4….then you’ll find out just how much
Your old mate,
Steve O
P.S. “Marvin V”….your NO this, NO that posting showed you have NO manners. NO one here cares what you think about CCL. NO WAY!!!
hi john! i just read on cc that the platinum gift has been changed to 8 soft drink coupons instead of a photo frame. this is great news! is it 8 per person or per cabin?
see you soon…
smiles, bee
xoxoxo
I think it is 4 per person. My sister & I just got off the Valor, & we each got 4. They were very much appreciated, as she is used to drinking soda at meals. Now if they had Pepsi instead of Coke, she would really be HAPPY!
Joyce
Bummer. We just got off of the Miracle on 12/5 and still got the picture frame. I would MUCH prefer the coupons. Maybe next time! Love your blog thingy John!
Hi John-
That was a jam-packed blog! I think that Carnival could do with bringing back some Cirque du Soleil-type acts– they are the rage and would employ the hot-bodied acrobatic types. And you might even find some double-jointed Latvian women contortionists
A really popular show in San Francisco is Beach Blanket Babylon, the longest running musical revue in theatre history. It spoofs pop culture, has great costumes and HUGE hats. Now that would be a great Carnival addition. check out the video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNa5oYsnLtA&NR=1v=fgSLFbUwG2A&feature=related
Annette
John
It is so wonderful to hear the about the great time you are having with your girls.
I wanted to tell you that Carnival has a winner with it’s new show WIN. I’ve haven’t attended a Carnival production show in about 2 years cause I have seen them all more than once. I was so excited when I found out the Elation would have the new show WIN. I enjoyed every minute of the show. Good job to the producers and choreographers for putting together a great show.
Safe travels to you and make sure to eat some real Memphis BBQ. Although I will confess to ordering the ribs in the Carnival dining room cause they are almost as good as Memphis BBQ ribs.
bonjour John!
living in Montréal, I saw almost every Cirque du Soleil itinary show they made up, and I am now verry picky about any other circus and they do not use any animal. You most go see one with your family. you will be astound at the music, costumes and special effects. Way to go Guy Laliberté!!!
à la prochaine,
Josée
Hi John, wanted to commend you on your terrrific job that was done on the Splender. We have cruises with you many times in the past and have always admired your outstanding inter-action with the cruisers. We are long time platinum cruisers and are great friends with Kuki & Geela of Cruisemates. We are leaving on 12/4/10 on the Liberty and have late seating confirmed, but would love to have a table for two. Would be very thankful for any help. John & Priscilla
Hello John,
Praises for your staff on the Pride….I am an outside agent for a Florida agency and sell, pretty much exclusively, Carnival. A friend, her husband and 4 (yes four!) children wanted a low cost inclusive vacation. I suggested the Pride as they live in Pennsylvania. They were “virgins” and required a large amount of care and feeding before they left on 21 Nov. One of the children has Down’s syndrome and my friend was concerned. I described the children’s programs and told her I thought all would be well. But I was hesitant a bit as she has a tendency to, let’s call it, be high strung. She called me from Port Canaveral and I held my breath. Then she told me they ALL were having an amazing time. Exhale. I had given her the CD’s name just in case and they did call him. He was responsive and impressed them to no end. While they were in port one of those other ships that has a name like one of yours and ears was there. The little girl with Down’s said “Mommy look – But our ship is better” and all the kids screamed in agreement and let me assure you they can scream. So, please pass my thanks on to your staff on the Pride, especially the CD and the Karaoke jockey. My guess is they will be Platinum in no time!
amazing time.
Good morning John!
I too have a neighbor with one of those 80 foot tall snowman balloon (truly I do)! It is truly a horrendous sight to see when I pull onto my road…it looms over everything and to tell you the truth, is a little frightening. I don’t understand it…just…don’t…understand.
p.s. – please choose Freedom on 1-29 to help me celebrate my half century old milestone. I met a fellow cruiser on CruiseCritic who is on the same sailing and come to find out we were both born on the same day and year – what are the odds of that?
Cindy
Hey John,
As my friend from Amherstburg Paul just suggested…….You can come sail with us on the MIRACLE before BC4. We’ll be on the Feb. 7th sailing. Hope you can make it.
B&D from Stratford.
John,
In my neighborhood the goal is to see who can get their decorations up first. So far it is difficult to beat Bill. He takes down Halloween & puts up Christmas on Nov.1. I’ve scaled back on mine to save the electricity money. Need it to book more Carnival cruises. Ones where I can see the water & feel like I’m on a ship, not a floating amusement park!
Hi John,
I noticed you were spotlighting piano bar entertainers and I just wanted to tell you about Laurie Ann Gardner, who was with us on the Valor last June. She is a great performer and so much fun to be with! Her room was packed every night. We all had a fun time doing Karaoke, singing along, and generally hanging out for some great music. She seems to love the crowd and just makes you feel comfortable to join in, like you are an old friend. Soooo…I tip my hat to her and I hope we see her again on one of our cruises!
Dear John.
We were on the Dream over Halloween this year. We had been planning this week since the dream was still in the building stage. The Dream is an amazing ship. There is so much to do on it, that we never made it to the whirlpools, water park, or mini golf let alone ate some of all the food on the ship. I must say that this was the most amazing cruise we had been on.
The CD at the time Josh W, (Big Sexy) was the best we have had to date. We were so glad to have him as a CD again. His team, George, Megan, Greg, Leonnie, and Christian were also amazing. We enjoyed every minute we had on the ship. This is a team that should never be split up. They should all go on all the ships together. That is how good they were as a team.
We can not wait till our next Dream cruise which is penciled in for Thanksgiving week next year.
When will the new CD list be posted? We are anxious to know where Josh will be.
I can honestly say though, that we do not care to sail with Wee Jimmy. I will not go into it on here, but just did not care for him.
We would love to sail with you sometime in the future. Our next cruise will be our Platinum cruise. We are also looking forward to that.
Have a wonderful Holiday season.
Hi John
I hope you have had a great time with your girls. I know you aren’t looking forward to leaving them, even for a short time.
Excuse me while I address Marvin V. and ClaireNYNY.
Marvin V. It is such a shame that you even wasted your time to write such nasty comments about CCL. There is probaly not a single person here that gives a rat’s arse about what you think. There are many folks here on this blog that have become lifelong friends and sail exclusively on CCL. In fact, with your attitude, it is probably best that you continue to cruise on the Mall of the Seas line. We wouldn’t want you around anyways. I am a milestone cruiser (49 Cruises) with CCL and ONE with RCL. Shows who I think is the best!!
ClaireNYNY: First of all, I am a smoker and I don’t appreciate being called an animal. I agree with Big Ed. The non-smokers are the ones that look and sound like animals when they encounter a whiff of smoke. I am a respiratory therapist, and have been for 29 years, so no one has to tell me about smok ing. I have never known of anyone that the smell of smoke or even walking through a designated smoking area to get lung cancer. Smoking may not be the best thing in the world for people, but what habits do you have? Or, are you one of those ex-smokers that now condemn those that choose to smoke? Good luck on finding a place that is totally, non-smoking. Even Disney World has designated smoking areas.
Thank you for letting me vent. I get so tired of the smoking debate. Every smoker I know has been courteous. I will continue to smoke on CCL ships in designated areas and on my balcony, until they tell me I can’t. After all, I paid for my vacation too,
Take care John and give the girls big hugs for me.
Gloria aka Sue
Well said on all points.
BIG Ed
We smokers are always the bad guys!
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John,
Since I am one of those over the top, use all the neighbors electricity, Christmas decorators, how about a decorate a Carnival Cruise ship contest. Winner gets free dinner in the Steak House–oh yeah Marv– a real steak house.
Mike
So funny that you should mention Frank’s Santa Balloon. Today as I was running some errands I saw one of these exact creatures in someone’s yard! I really had a good laugh at it. Mind you this person must know frank because his yard looked like Christmas had puked all over it. There were lights and blow up things littered all over his house and yard. Scary stuff!!!
Have a safe flight back to the states!!!
Zuriel
Hi John,
I’m one of the crowd who thoroughly enjoyed your Smoke on The Water posts and got hooked. I so enjoy you!
My husband REALLY surprised me with the suggestion that we take a 5-day cruise as a mental health investment. Bless his heart, he really needs the de-stressing that we look forward to on the Ecstasy, departing Dec. 6.
Since we bought our tickets so late in the game, we are wait-listed for early dining. While it would be wonderful to be able to dine early, I am far more concerned about being seated at a table for two because of that de-stressing thing. (I can easily start up a conversation with anyone if I want to, especially on any Carnival ship, but you know that saying about opposites attract? Well . . . yeah. It’s true. )
We are in cabin R231.
Thank you SO MUCH for your willingness to work whatever magic you can on behalf of us fans! I realize it might be too late by the time you read this, and if so, thank you anyway!
John, I hope you have a safe flight. I am waiting anxiously to hear what is going to happen on the BC4. 92 days and counting.
Cruising Grandma
Carol-Ann
John:
Please turn on the Video link on the Dream. Like to watch the people having fun
Okay so I have been reading the blog for years now on and off, and have always enjoyed reading it. I have however never left a comment before so there is always a first time for everthing, right. I justed wanted to say to Marvin if you dont like Carnival why dont you just go on and cruise on what ever you do like. We dont need to know and you surely not going to change our minds on what we like. And John and the Carnival corporation really dont care, so why dont you spend your time doing something else, may I suggest the MALL. Carnival will always have there Carnival lovers.That is what is wrong with this world now to many people trying to tell others what they should and shouldn’t like. We all have our own brains to think for ourselves. As for the smoking thing when all of you non smokers start paying for my cabin that is when you should be able to tell me where I can and cannot smoke. I have only been on two cruises both were with Carnival loved both of them. However in the future if I cant smoke any where on the ship then it wont be for me. If you are really that concerned with what you breathe in then may I suggest that you start wearing a face mask ever time you go outside because who knows what you are breathing in out there, or even in your own house. Anyway love the blog thingey John it is my escape and my way of seeing the ships keep up the good work.
Marvin, Marvin, Marvin.. you a$$wipe.. please go back and crawl under your rock.. we dont need trolls like u here. Loser!
John, Please choose the Carnival Ecstasy! You are always welcome in Texas!
John, (Please Reply)
Now that you have had a bit of time to recover and are back with the beards.
Is there an up-date on the SPLENDOR and its crew?
What has been determined as the root cause?
What corrective action is going to take place?
What is the timing for the SPLENDOR to return to sea?
Will there be any retrofitting of the remaining ships as a result of Carnivals investigation?
As a customer and stock holder I was hoping to get a candid reply.
Cheers, 25 days and counting – Carnival DREAM
BTW, Holiday lights in Round Rock, Texas (follow the link)
Please, John, schedule yourself on the Carnival Freedom prior to the Bloggers Cruise !!!
A group of approx. 22 from Ohio from Tom’s high school graduation class is going on the Freedom on 2/6/11 and it would be great to see you again.
A quick THANK YOU for your help in getting us a table for two on our recent Miracle cruise. We celebrated our 35th anniversary during the cruise.
Hi John
I saw that the Valor will be in Dry Dock in January & was wondering if they will be adding theSerenity Adult-Only Retreat. We sailed on the Freedom in January & enjoyed the new facilities.
We will be on the Valor in January 2012.
Hi, John. I’m a long-time Carnival cruiser (38 so far, going back to 1987, with # 39 and # 40 already booked), but I’m new to the blog thingy.
I’ve cruised many times by myself (but I’ve never gone to any of the singles get-togethers, as they’re past my bedtime!). Carnival is very good at seating solo travelers with other solo travelers about the same age (at least for us middle-aged folks), so we’re not in the midst of someone’s family reunion.
I was on the Carnival Splendor on the 3rd of her legs around South America last year (and a passenger jumped overboard – the poor Splendor seems to have a black cloud hanging over her; maybe she needs an exorcism). I had great table mates and have kept in touch with 3 of them. One booked the same solo Hawaiian cruise this past spring on the Carnival Spirit, so we asked to be seated together again at dinner (which, for some reason, Carnival interpreted as a request for a table for 2). We are each booked solo on the 5/10 sailing of the Carnival Magic (along with another of our table mates from the Splendor), and we are each booked solo on the 11/28 Panama Canal transit of the Carnival Paradise.
Sorry this is so long, but I wanted to let you know that traveling solo isn’t a scary thing – just more expensive.
Am enjoying the blog thingy. I’ve sailed with you before somewhere along the way. You do a great Dolly Parton.
Hi John,
This is to Marvin V, you can keep your RCL ships, I have cruised on them and never, never again. They are the worst of all of the cruise lines and you know it. It is sad when a person pays all of that money only to get food poisoning from the under cooked food that they serve. It was not the Noro-virus, it was just plain laziness from one of the cooks that caused about 14 of us to suffer for a couple of days. At least with Carnival, I know my food is throughly cooked. It was not fun having to stay in my cabin for two days, which really ruined my cruise.
To CLAIRENYNY,
You have got to be a former smoker, they are the only ones that talk this way so lady, you really need to get a life.. I have never smoked in my life, but I would never call smokers Animals or Killers. that is their choice to smoke, just like you have choices that you have made in your life. I have been on 3 Carnival Cruises and I have never once smelled smoke on any of their ships (now I can not say that about RCL), even when I was on the Carnival Pride and I walked through the Casino, I did not smell smoke. CLAIRENYNY, you might be interested to know that there is only ONE cruise line that is 100% non -smoking and that is the American Cruise Line, every other cruise lines have areas for smokers, so you just better get used to it if you want to go on a cruise
Kathy M..
Hi John,
I will be a first time Carnival cruiser on the Freedom March 26th, 2011. I am so excited and we are taking our little ones 5 and 9….
I just booked a nighttime zipline tour in Puerto Rico while in port and I posted on some boards about it but no one can give me any information about it. Have you heard much about this excursion or is it something new?
Your ships look beautiful and I cannot wait until my little ones see that huge ship sitting in port………..My 9 year old asked if she could sit with us while we play bingo.
………..Anyhow I just wanted to write as I am so excited about Carnival and I love your blog………………
Jerry
I don’t smoke (except for a cigar once in a while for a special occassion) and I would never ever refer to smokers as animals. I can honestly say that I have never had a problem in my cabin, on my balcony or in any public area. Just don’t sit in the (very limited) smoking sections and you’ll be fine! I have no sympathy for non smokers who go in a smoking section and act like the smokers are doing something wrong. As long as smokers only use the designated areas and are courteous, we non-smokers have no right to complain. You have no right to judge Carnival’s smoking policies until you’ve actually experienced them.
John,
First time post, long time reader! I just wanted to say that we just came off a wonderful week on the Fanasty! It was our first time sailing out of Charleston and it is a great port to embark from. I am glad Carnival choose to sign on there. (I heard there is an new terminal being built next year. Hopefully Carnival will put a second ship there!) Anyway, we were expecting Stephanie to be the CD when we boarded and with the reviews that we read before the trip, we had high expectations. When we got on board we found that she was reassigned:( However we quickly were introduced to “Sexy” Craig and his staff. All we can say is that they were the best group of people. Craig was always “on”. He made sure everyone was having a good time and even made it a point to learn names. The assistant CD was Christy and the other entertainment staff were Chelsea and Amanda. I want to especially thank the three of them. Anyone of them could easily be a CD now!! Chelsea went out of her way to get me a “Ship on a Stick” after I won the game show trivia. They did not get them in until after Freeport and she did not forget me!. Amanda was finishing up her contract and it was a very emotional last day. We all wish her the best for the future! I want to thank Bugas and Rudi, the bartenders from the Lido deck and Universal Lounge. They always make sure that we had a drink in hand!! Also, Selvin and his staff in the the Celebration dining room were great!! We look forward to our next (#5) cruise soon.
Hi John,
If you want to see lights, you should come to Richmond, VA some time. They have so many house that go overboard decorating they have what is called ‘The Tacky Light Tour’. They had their own show on TLC a few years ago! The requirement to have ‘Tacky Lights’ is at least 40,000 bulbs!
CJ
OK John,
I’m really not liking the new format. The colors and centered text are hard to read. Please revert to something with a lighter background and put the text justified back on the left side of the screen. PLEASE!!!!
Your friend in Texas,
Larry Meador
Miracle please John … It would make the Miracle Mateys very happy …OK …this Miracle Matey
Dear John,
Last year we went to the Rose Parade with the Grandkids. I will be watching the Cunard float from the comfort of my living room instead of a cold curb in Pasadena.
The Cruzin2some
Hello John,
I agree with Big Ed, who is a very considerate smoker. Smoking in the room, where there is a sprinkler head and a smoke alarm is probably safer than the balcony, which can be breezy. After all, that’s how the fire started on the Princess ship a few years ago. A cigarette butt (or some ashes) blew back from the balcony and hit the curtains. I am a non-smoker and I hope never to meet the person who called all smokers “animals”. I also don’t want to meet Marvin. Hey Marvin, this is me ignoring you. One for all and all for fun.
Your Friend,
Cheryl D.
My very 1st cruise in 1996 was on Royal Snobs of the seas. I went years before taking my 2nd because I wanted no more part of cruising from what I experienced on my 1st. Then a close friend talked my into trying Carnival in 2006. I will be taking my PLATINUM cruise in March on MY DREAM ! ! I have the pleasure of meeting John on stage on the Freedom on an unforgetable cruise in 2008. Life is an adventure GIVE ME THE “FUN SHIPS” not the SNOB ships ! ! !
Dear John,
I must confess – my house is all decked out in lights and music and Christmas trees inside and out. And I send out an annual newsletter (with photos) in my Christmas cards as well. I know it’s not your thing, but I do offer at least one item of “value” – I include a family recipe in my newletters every year.
Laura
HMMMMM Wasn’t Roger just on my Pride Cruise (I partook of the piano bar once, so I did see that fellow…) that started November 28?