Amongst those crew members who have been with Carnival for a good number of years there are a group of guests who make us sweat every time they walk on board the ship. They live to moan and find fault wherever their shark eyes fall. It is their mission to be a pain in the arse and it’s your mission to need an urgent toilet break whenever they come anywhere near you. This is an exclusive group and most guest services managers and hotel directors and some of my fellow cruise directors are aware of them. There is one famous guest we refer to as “Queenie” because she honestly believes she is royalty and she is famous for walking around the ship with a note pad and pen asking other guests if they have any complaints and then taking those comments each and every day of the cruise to the hotel director.
There is a lady whose name I can’t publish but thinks she is the godmother of the fleet……not just one ship……oh no……..the entire fleet, even though she isn’t and although she is loving and giving to the crew she really doesn’t have all her ships in the harbour if you know what I mean. Then there is “The Professor” who I hope doesn’t read this. He is an extraordinary chap who claims he is a professor at Harvard University. Well he isn’t but he is someone who likes to go to the steakhouse and eat his meal……..and eat it all of it……….and then simply say that it wasn’t cooked to his liking and demand a refund. And so we play the game. He eats it, he refuses to pay, we tell him he has to and so he demands a meeting with someone in authority and eventually after wasting an hour of their lives, he agrees to pay.
These guests are infamous and there are others like them but even though we all start to sweat when they walk up the gangway they are mostly harmless and also have two things in common. One is that they are all loyal Carnival customers and two………..they all travel alone and thus it seems to me they seek out attention because quite simply………..they are lonely.
And while these guests are eccentric, give me them any day over the lady who threw her wet laundry at me or the lady this week who demanded her bible be removed from the cabin and is now stating that she wants $200 compensation because my announcement about a medical debarkation of a guest yesterday woke her up.
Time for some Q and A……….here we go.
Kathy asked:
Hi John,First of all let me say thank you for this blog……..it’s great and I like being able to have my questions that I get from CC answered on here….I have read several posts of where there are no trays on the Carnival Dreams buffet bar………..Could you please tell me if this is true….I am going on the Carnival Dream in September……..Thanks in advance for your help…Keep up the good work
John says:
Hello Kathy,I am glad you like the blog and I hope you continue to enjoy it as your Carnival Dream cruise approaches. We don’t have those ugly plastic cafeteria trays anymore as they have been replaced with handsome oversized plates that act as well as trays but look much better. Now you may have to go back and collect your dessert separately but overall they are a huge improvement and have been well received here and on the Carnival Dream as well. Have a brilliant time and loads of fun.
Best wishes.
John
Promese Perry asked:
Hi John,Unfortunately, there was a traffic accident going into Mobile, Ala., and we were unable to make it to the ship on time. Carnival shows their customers no compassion all they want is your money. They didn’t give us anything back not even a credit. My B’day was July 31; this was the worst B’day of my life. The dock supervisor kept telling us to come on in and we will wait, then we got there he said they just pulled the gate. I hate I ever booked this trip with Carnival. Our salesperson was not informative, everything is done self service. This has been the worst experience of my life. Carnival says that they are sorry but has a terrible way of showing it.
John says:
Hello Promese Perry,I am so sorry to read what happened and I am sure that by now someone from Carnival has been in touch with you. However, I will pass this onto someone who can talk to you about the situation that happened. Thank you for letting me know and someone will be in touch.
Best wishes.
John
Nick Harnden asked:
Hi John,I am writing to express my immense disappointment in my cruise on the Carnival Fascination. I had written to you on Facebook asking for you to arrange a table for two to help celebrate my fifth wedding anniversary and you said that you would tell the maitre d. So imagine my disgust when we arrived to dinner on the 1st night to see that we were sitting at a table for 8 people and 4 of them were loud screaming KIDS!!! I am not impressed with this at all and you should not make promises that you cannot keep. I hope you’re happy that your disservice ruined our vacation and our anniversary.
John says:
Hello Nick Harnden,I am so sorry to read this and that my request to seat you at a table for two was not met. I must say in my defence though that I never promise that it will be, I simply say “I will do my best” and most of the time the maitre ds are able to help. But occasionally they can’t or they forget or other factors come into play. I hope that there were many aspects of the cruise that you did enjoy and that we will see you again soon. Please accept my sincere apologies.
Best wishes,
John
Mary Van Nurden asked:
Hi John,Hope you are having a GREAT DAY and GREAT CRUISE this time out. My question if you please is a two-parter. We are sailing on Carnival Magic on January 15, 2012, out of Galveston, my better half Ken (like you) loves to enjoy a good cigar on occasion. We have a cove balcony, and I understand that he can smoke there, but I wondered if all Carnival Magic interiors are now non-smoking as far as cigars go, also outdoors where can he indulge? I smoke, but can wait to get to my private balcony, if necessary. Other part of my question. I think I read about a cigar shop that you frequent in Cozumel. Would you re-post name as he will be looking for a few quality cigars to supplement his supply while on the cruise. Thank you very much for replying to this and for all you do daily. I read your blog thingy and follow you on Facebook. You are the best, also love that you are from the area in England as my great grandparents ESSEX! Would love to go to England one day
Mary
John says:
Hello Mary Van Nurden,The cove balconies are superb cabins and of course from December 1 guests will not be able to smoke inside the cabins but only on the balconies. On the Dream class ships (unlike all the other classes) the only place to smoke cigars is outside on the beautiful Lanai – under the stars. Now while I admit I continue to miss the big comfortable leather chairs that the cigar bars provided, smoking a cigar under the stars is something quite special. On this ship the port side of the Lanai is smoking from the Ocean Plaza down to the RedFrog Pub. The cigar shop I use in Cozumel is the Casa De Habana at the Forum shops in downtown Cozumel. Please be aware that there are many, many fake cigars for sale in Mexico but Casa de Habana has the real thing. I am glad you enjoy the blog and Facebook and maybe one day I will meet you walking around the streets of Essex.
Best wishes to all.
John
Laurna Zambretta asked:
John,I am surprised your wife hasn’t said something to you about your weight John. Does she not care that her child may not grow up knowing you because you have no respect for yourself and are obese? I see that even today in the blog where Richard tried to help you with dietary advice that you rebuked him and made fun of him which shows you to be the man that most of your sad supporters can’t see. I cruised with you once and seeing you on stage and that huge stomach bulging from that blue jacket made me physically sick. I guess you have no self esteem.
John says:
Hello Laurna Zambretta,I actually considered deleting this post but then decided against it so I could simply say that I owe you an apology if my appearance made you feel ill during your cruise because that is not good at all and I am truly sorry. I am on a diet and am losing weight all the time albeit very slowly. So thanks for taking the time to write and I hope the next time you see me I don’t have to make sure there are vomit bags in the show room.
Best wishes.
John
Brenda Lanthier asked:
Hi John,Will you be on the Magic Feb.19, 2012 out of Galveston TX?
John says:
Hello Brenda Lanthier,Yes indeed I will be and I will be the cruise director of the Carnival Magic from January 29 until the end of March/beginning of April. I hope I see you there and if you have any questions please do let me know.
Best wishes.
John
Valerie asked:
John,Do you ever “moonlight” on any of the other carnivore…….er……Carnival brands? I tend to cruise with Princess or Holland America and not often with Carnival so I have not had the pleasure of meeting you. I think they should share the wealth……..…and pass you around their other lines from time to time.
John says:
Hello Valerie,While I do occasionally get to sail with the sister companies it is only as a passenger or to write about the ship for the blog but never to work. I would love to do a guest spot for Princess, Holland America or Cunard maybe although I am not sure the feeling is mutual as my…..… ummmm ………. style……..or lack of it may be a little different to what they are used to. They are both brilliant lines and I can understand exactly why you are such a fan of them both as I am too. Thanks for those very kind words and I truly hope we can sail together one day soon.
Best wishes.
John
Dorothy Lamont asked:
John!My daughter and I just returned from our cruise on the Carnival Valor and I need to express my disappointment for the tea time that was served on the sea days. While the pastry selection was adequate, the dress code was not. My daughter and I always dress for tea on Celebrity cruises as did the other passengers but on the Carnival Valor there were people in shorts and T-shirts and one lady wore a sarong through which you could see everything! If you are going to have a dress code then it should be enforced as this left a very bad taste in our mouths and has us thinking about returning to Celebrity.
John says:
Hello Dorothy Lamont,Tea time is a very popular event on all our ships and I am glad that you mentioned it as it’s not something we talk about here on the blog. I have to point out that we don’t actually write a dress a code for tea time as its mid-afternoon and I don’t really think a dress code is applicable. I also have to mention that two weeks ago I attended tea time on the Cunard ship Queen Elizabeth which is about as grand as it gets and there was someone there in shorts, as well. It is designed to be a relaxed break from the sun and I hope now that you know this, you will understand that none of your fellow guests were breaking any kind of dress code. I also hope that you had a brilliant time on the cruise and that we will see you again very soon.
Best wishes to you both.
John
Trisha B asked:
John,On September 2 my family and I will be on the Carnival Paradise in cabin U57. It’s our anniversary of 12 years and my birthday will have just gone by.
John says:
Hello Trisha B,I am wondering if there is a part of your posting that accidentally got deleted and if that’s the case and you see this reply please let me know what I can do for you. However, I am guessing by the way you mentioned the cabin and the celebrations you are having that you may be hinting that I send you something. If that is the case then message received loud and clear. If not, please let me know ASAP. Have a great cruise.
Best wishes.
John
GoLucky Cruiser asked:
Dear John,My wife and I will be with you for the inaugural cruise from Galveston on the Carnival Magic and we are both very excited. I have read a lot about the Cucina restaurant and wondered if you could help me with a reservation there for two people on the 17th at 7:30pm for cabin 12002.
Thanks so much.
John says:
Hello GoLucky Cruiser,I am excited too about our first cruise from Galveston, as I am sure it’s going to be a brilliant experience. The Cucina del Capitano is indeed a superb experience and with a price tag of $10 is extraordinary value for money. Unfortunately I am not able to take reservations here on the blog. I know I do for the steakhouse and for The Chef’s Table but I really don’t want to start with Cucina just because I won’t be able to handle the extra workload. You can book as soon as you board the ship from a direct line in your cabin or by visiting the Cucina on deck 11 aft. I will see you soon and I promise you’ll love the Cucina experience and love this brilliant ship.
Best wishes.
John
And that’s all for today and a huge thank you for all your kind words and comments.
Now here is Mr. Breezie’s latest adventure:
Now, let’s take a break and post as requested by someone on Facebook the new recipe for one of the new Comfort Foods on the menu – the delicious Bacon Mac & Cheese.
Macaroni and Cheese
Yield = 10 ServingsBrie Cheese 8 oz
Mozzarella Cheese 8 oz
Pasta Macaroni 2 lb
Sour Cream 1 lb
Mascarpone Cheese 8 oz
Parmesan Cheese 6 oz
Swiss cheese 6 oz
Half- &-Half Cream 1 pint
Heavy cream 1.5 qt
Cheddar 12 oz
Apple wood Smoked Bacon 2 lbs
Chicken Breast 3 oz 10 ea.
White pepper to tasteHeat pan, add cream and half- &-half; bring it to boil. Slowly fold in brie, mascarpone, Swiss cheese, (half the quantity) cheddar cheese and, and sour cream. Season well. Boil macaroni in salted water drain fold in the cheese sauce. Add cooked bacon to the macaroni. Pour 6 oz of pasta in the center of the pasta bowl. Arrange dices of fresh mozzarella on the top of the pasta.
Hand chop rest of the cheddar cheese and mix with grated parmesan, and sprinkle it over the macaroni. Place for two minutes under a broiled to gratinate. Serve with grilled chicken breast and garnish with a crisp rasher of apple-wood smoked bacon and a parsley sprig.
My thanks to our Fleet Executive Chef Peter Leypold for sending me this recipe and I am sure I will feature more of his creations from the new menus during the weeks ahead.
I would like to pass on a piece of news to the guests who are sailing on the Carnival Miracle for the 9/11 cruise and specifically those who had requested a coin presentation to the captain. Here is an email I received from the hotel director:
Good afternoon John,
I spoke with Captain Vincenzo Alcaras regarding a suitable time/place for Mr. Howard Graham presentation of a challenge coin and plaque to the captain and we would like to suggest the following:
Date: 09/12
Venue: Phantom Theatre (main lounge)
Time: 10:45amThis is the scheduled time we have for the captain to be introduced on stage, followed by his introduction of his two most senior officers. We can include this special presentation on the announcement made by CD via PA system on the day if necessary.
Please let me know if this plan is acceptable in order to confirm with Captain Alcaras.
Thank you and regards,
Carlos Santos de Melo
Hotel Director, Carnival Miracle
So for Howard (and my now good mate Steve Z) I hope this is OK and if so please can one of you drop me a line on Facebook so I can confirm.
Talking of 9/11, I took a poll on Facebook about what we should do on this date to recognise the 10 years that have passed since this tragic event happened. After much deliberation it was decided that on each ship there would be a brief speech made by the captain plus a few moments pause as we remember those who lost their lives.
Well, it has been ridiculously busy for the beards as they juggle around all the ships that have been affected by Hurricane Bastard. The complexities that this involves are extraordinary and as always our team in Miami have done a brilliant job finding new ports, getting the message to the guests and most importantly making sure that the fleet is 100 percent safe.
But help was on hand for those left standing on the pier and it came in the shape of our brilliant shoreside team. You know, after the Carnival Splendor fire huge praise was lavished on the crew for how well they coped and what brilliant and dedicated service they gave during the incident – and rightfully so. But probably not enough was said about the magnificent way Carnival’s shoreside folks sprang into action and made hotel and flight arrangements for each and every guest. And they did the same in San Juan on Sunday. They were there to assist, explain and arrange all the various travel options for each and every guest regardless if they had air booked through Carnival. Now at this point you are probably going to expect me to mention what other cruise lines did or didn’t do but that would be unprofessional of me, wouldn’t it?
The only sad point was that guests had to fly to Barbados in order to meet the ship and some could not because they didn’t have passports with them. I know there are different opinions about this but my view that in today’s travel world I think everyone should get a passport as you never know when you may need one as this situation proves. Anyway, from what I have read, Carnival efforts in San Juan have been applauded and I think we can safely say yet again that our shoreside care team is simply the absolute best in the business.
So back here then to the Carnival Magic where it’s 6:18am and here I am in my underpants writing to you. I have been doing my best to keep everyone updated on Facebook regarding Hurricane Bastard plus run the ship as normal. It was an excellent cruise and the British guests had a brilliant time. I did talk to some Brits about tipping which to cut a long story short, the guests felt that although the service from their dining room team and stateroom steward had been really good they felt that the tips should be at their discretion and not pre-planned by Carnival. They told me they would prefer to pay the tips in cash. Anyway, I told them what to do and thanked them hoping that they would honour what they had said and tip the service staff. You see, Brits and tipping just don’t go together. But we are changing. The culture of tipping is spreading fast and gratuities are now expected in countries where they were previously unheard of or, at least, not generally expected and that includes the UK.
We had our usual concerns with the language problems that such a high international count brings but apart from that and a lady who hated bibles, red lights, and announcements about medical debarkations and me everything went really well. The decision to go to Venice early was absolutely the right one and overall I think the voyage was one of the best. But it’s done and the guests are leaving and by 9:15am debarkation will have finished. Then at 10:30 am, we start all over again and here is who is sailing with us this cruise…….wish it was you.
Total Guests: 4,405
International Guests -
FRENCH 127
DUTCH 91
RUSSIAN 186
PORTUGUESE 22
ITALIAN 31
JAPANESE 3
GERMAN 152
SPANISH 221
BRITISH 551
So fewer British guests this cruise but still a high count nonetheless and 152 Germans, as well as the regular Russians. And this is where we are all going and who is entertaining them.
Fri, Aug, 26: Barcelona Chas Elstner/Percy Crews dep @ 5pm
Sat, Aug, 27: at sea Welcome Aboard Show
Sun, Aug, 28: Livorno Destination Unknown/ Chas Elstner/Percy Crews 7am-7pm
Mon, Aug, 29: Rome Activities / Deck Party 7am-10pm
Tue, Aug, 30: Naples Win 7am-7pm
Wed, Aug, 31: Messina Sam Jay (Multi Instrumentalist) 7am-6pm
Thu, Sep, 01: at sea Groove Line Jeff Jena/Jerry Goodspeed
Fri, Sep, 02: Mallorca David Deeble Jeff Jena/Jerry Goodspeed 7am-4pm
Sat, Sep, 03: Marseilles Carnival Legends 8am-6pm
Bloody heck……don’t kids go to school anymore?
I now have an extraordinary 17,786 mates on Facebook and 11,500,000 views on the blog thingy but it seems Mr. Micky Arison already has more than 17,000 twits following him and he only started twitting a few days ago. I still don’t totally understand this twit thingy but from what I have read from Mr. Arison he is basically answering the question “What are you doing?” And it seems he is supposed to tell people the answer to this as many times as he possibly can each day ………bugger that. Especially since the status updates are limited to 140 characters or less, including spaces. I love that. Who types without spaces? Regular readers of the blog thingy already know it takes me 140 characters to say good morning. I couldn’t Twitter, I would be panicking thinking do I really need this space? Is this question mark important? I would have to discipline myself. Where’s the fun in that?
But it is obviously working for Carnival Corporation & plc’s Chairman and CEO and I think it’s brilliant that he is doing it and answering questions, as well. It’s certainly worth following him because maybe one day we will get a “tweet” from him while he’s sitting in the boardroom. “Trying to decide if I should give a new ship to Carnival or Princess what do you think?” Anyway, congratulations to him on the instant success he has had with this and it’s a great read so stop by and be one of his twits.
Well, at the start of today’s blog I revealed some of the names that we have for some of our more colourful guests but there is a name that we used to have for our guests back in the late 1980’s and early 1990s. Yes, we used to call them passengers not guests but there was also another name. The vast majority of today’s crew has never heard this term and it’s only the old timers like me that remember this. It started way before I joined in 1987 has been lost as the years have come and gone.
Its history is derived from the times when we used to have theme nights in the dining room. This would involve a menu matching the uniform the waiters would wear and included Caribbean night, Italian night and one night with a New Year’s Eve theme. Now this included the waiters singing Old Lang Syne and no expense was spared in creating a brilliant party atmosphere in the dining room. Well…….ummmmm…..yes actually it was spared because all we did was hang four balloons above each table and each place setting there would be a noise maker and……..a hat. Every guest had a hat. It was one of those small cone-shaped hats with sparkly bits on them and guests would put them on as soon as they sat down. What was remarkable was that every guest would put the hat on…….every single one. I know because remember I used to work in the dining room as a wine steward. Yep, the dining room was full of guests in hats blowing their noise makers. But once dinner was finished the guests would leave and head to the shows, the bars and their cabins (not their staterooms, as we call them now)…….still in their cone-shaped hats and would continue to wear them all night long and many would wear them the next day of the cruise as well. And so for a few years back then in the days of the male nightgown contest and beer drinking competitions……..we called the guests……..coneheads. It was a term of endearment and one made in the spirit of fun and in jest. These days you are guests and we are not crew………we are team members. How things have changed.
I was confused yesterday during a telephone conference call with nine ladies and gentlemen with beards about an upcoming project. During the call a beard said something that made me want to reach down the phone and give them a wet willie!
This person said that they would “Have to accomplish this P2P.”……..everyone seemed to agree and before I could cover my mouth I said, “What the hell is a P2P?”
There was silence……and it was as though I had just asked “Where do babies come from?” Then one of the beards said it means pillow to pillow which in turn means flying in and flying out the same day, which is just about the most ludicrous bollocks I’ve ever heard.
And so I said:
“Well, I am sorry but I have to go as I NAS”
“What’s NAS?” said Eric the beard
“Need a s**t,” I replied.
And with that, the conference call was over.
Pillow to pillow, my arse.
Goodnight Mr. and Mrs. Cone.
Your friend,
John
Look, friends — there are a few things you should remember before you comment. The space below is for you to post your comments about the post I've just written above. If it is something that's unrelated, please use the Ask John tab above. Now, while I may not be able to reply to your comment below, I do sit in my underpants almost every morning and read everything that is here. So feel free to comment on the comments and then if someone wants to comment on the comment to the comment then go ahead as well. Please be courteous unless the poster is French...........then you can say whatever you want.
Laurna – you should (and probably are) ashamed of yourself.
The female complaining that you woke her up with a medical emergency announcement and demandin compensation should be declared too stupid to cruise and banned for life! Witchs’ like this are the first to squeal if it is them that gets a hang nail!
I wish I had a private email address for you so I could comment on Laurna Zambrett’s very very rude message. I am truly stunned how insensitive and evil some people are. Oooh I could go on a right old rant now – she has made me cross, but I can’t say what I want to say on here or on your wall thingy as my language would be too blue! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
Bible-hating b!$#* from hell should be your name for that certain customer.
No Canadians????? Wow… how will anyone have any fun without a Canadian on board?
I agree..but i think he actually doesn’t include the american and canadian count each time….just something I’ve noticed over time with him posting the counts…
Love the blog today John as usual!!!
Thatbis just what I thought when I read international guests..
… so we Canadians and Americans are the regulars that means…. I like it!
so totally agree – we are a fun lot!
great post today john, i love the day to day stuff… wiwt!
smiles, bee
xoxo
John:
Please tell Promese Perry that all they have to do is submit the cost of this cruise with their travel insurance.
I mean if they were responsible enough to leave home in sufficient time to allow for
traffic delays (as most people do)…surely they were responsible enough to have purchased travel insurance…..right?
Opps…never mind….
It never ceases to amaze me every time people expect someone else to pay for their stupidity.
Linda (Mom of your friend DJ)
How do YOU know about what happened to this couple? YOU were wrong about my problem with Carnival and you MAY be wrong about this incident too. Yet you call them stupid. Does that make you feel classy and superior pecking away. YOU really need to stay out of others affairs.
Charlie> I have no idea WHAT your mistake was…so I can not comment on that.
However, it is VERY MUCH my business since I am a Carnival STOCKHOLDER when a passenger expects STOCKHOLDERS to pay for their irresponsible behavior.
IF they had purchased travel insurance, they would not be condemning Carnival for not giving them a refund.
So while I may not know IF they left home in time to make the ship….I DO KNOW that they were not responsible enough to purchase insurance.
If you don’t get this, then you have bigger issues than your ENTITLEMENT mentality.
No you made it your business to add your two cents into my problem with Carnival. And you show no class whatsoever in commenting about others complaints. It is laughable that you throw around I’m a stockholder so I have to watch out for people scamming the cruise line. It really is laughable. Who cares? Does that make the problems go away? Do you have ANYTHING whatsoever to do with this? Or is that your excuse to put in your stupid(your word) opinions and feel like you are so much better than someone else. Since you allow yourself to speculate about anyone elses incidents…Here’s mine …maybe you are alone because all around you left you a long time ago. You see how easy that is. Now I feel so good about myself because I put you down. Get it? Listen stay out of my business. Oh and by the way I hold General Electric but I don’t go to the airport to make sure the jet engines they sold are working right. You are small and pathetic.
It also becomes our business when someone posts a comment on a public blog! Great reply!
My thoughts exactly. A person posts something on a public blog is allowing for everyone to make there own opinions. One may not agree with it but that is the way it goes.
The interesting thing in this situation is the poster was in contact with port authorities who told them to come ahead. On arrival the story changed to “so sorry”.
Charlie…cut out the coffee!
Brilliant as usual! You have hit the nail on the head with the P2P business. I have heard many BS phrases from management and whenever I hear one of these new “catch phrases” they seem to come up with in thier insomniac frenzies I feel just as you do! It always provides me a good laugh when I read what your thoughts were.
Proud to be a conehead, a passenger or a guest, just so long as it means I’m on a ship! Hope this is a beautiful cruise for you with no red light bible haters. OOPS! My bad, that didn’t quite sound right did it?
Your friend,
Jodi
Nick Harnden… Uhhhhhhhhhh hello…So now that we all know you can use your words, why didn’t you approach the Maitre’d and very nicely say “I would like to request a table for 2 if it is available”… Hello…what is wrong with you… John NEVER promises… He tries his best… And based on your nasty letter, I’m glad you didn’t get your request… you don’t deserve it… I’m just sorry that the kids had to sit with you…
OK! As a smoker, I am EXTREMELY concerned about this “apple wood smoked bacon”, I want to know IS it REALLY smoked over Apple Wood, OR is it “apple wood smoked flavoured bacon”? Sorry BigJ, but its buggin me to know the reality, trade descriptions act and all that? I am on a mission in my country to change menus so they speak the truth, so ….??? Hows your Apple wood? Smoke Flavoured or REALLY smoked??? xoxo
Seriously?? You must to be kidding me!
@Nick Harnden: Did you ever consider trying to take care of your needs yourself? If a table for 2 was so important to you that not having it would ruin your entire cruise, why didn’t you just ask the Maitre’d for one? They are always happy to help, all you had to do was ask nicely!
@Dorothy Lamont: Oh Good Grief!!! If you weren’t so busy worrying about what everyone else was doing, you would have enjoyed tea time with your daughter. Is sticking your nose in the air and judging everyone around you really more important than sharing some special time with your daughter on vacation? Get over yourself princess!
Vicki, I totally agree!!!
Oh the days when we could shoot guns off the sides of the ship and had to step over the thresholds of the ship. I don’t miss the paper hats though to be honest! I do have a trophy as the proud winner of the beer drinking contest on the Carnivale!
oh my god, laurna, who died and made you the big belly police. how rude. i find it most annoying that people think that because you can’t see them they can say the stupidest things. i remember when i smoked, and people would say things that made me cringe, and this is just another example of poor form. get a life.. so there and to you john sorry for this, but you see all kinds in your field. just another dumbing down there. your friend kathy
I thought P2P meant Person to Person (or face to face) which I guess means kinda the same….
Laura……are you a real person? I really think carnival beards made up this post since I cannot believe there is such an insensitive, stupid, idiot like you on planet earth. Take a good look in the mirror and you will see many imperfections. You might get sick, too. I sure would if I and to look at someone like you. Just thinking about you and the cruel, inhumane things you said in your commet make me sick. I hope you rot!!!!!
Totally agree w/your comments, couldnt believe the nerve of that Laura, gal.
John,
I am now cleaning my screen after spitting on it from laughter. I NAS……………awesome.
My buddy’s on our baseball team call it
DAD………..dropping a deuce!
Have fun and smooth sailing!
B&D from Canada
Remember baked alaska for the captain’s dinner on the last night…..what days they were….I know that the crew is now called “team members” just like disney…omg…give me those days back
and the Cherries Jubilee — on the heads of the waiters (LIT!) while they danced — It was great!!
First they came for the smokers but I was not a smoker so I did not object. Then they came for the fat people but I was not fat so I did not object. Then they came for the people who did not dress for dinner but I did dress for dinner so I did not object. Then they came for the ugly people but I was not ugly so I did not object. Then they came for me and there was no one left to object.
John,
First off, I would like to thank you for what you do and for all the wonderful staff members of Carnival in Galveston Texas. You blogy thingy is most humorous and informative I have read in a long time.
My wife and I are 7 time cruisers on Carnival and I thought that you might still be CD on the Carnival Magic when she sails on Jan 29, 2012. Is it true that you will have to depart Galveston earlier than expected and if so are you scheduled to return for another round of Texas hospitality.
Thanks again and best regards.
Bill….the Jan. 29, 2012 trip will (per current schedule) be when John returns to Carnival Magic from his vacation. Why do I know? I’m going on that voyage also and John said “see you there mate”.
Thanks Steve,
I was hoping he still was going to be there, Must meet him sometime on the cruise
Yes only those of us on board in the olden days would know the terms coneheads, crew, etc. I guess the proper terms have changed but the stories about the early 90′s guests will never change.
John, I would like to respond to the untasteful and callous email that you received from ‘Laura Zambretta’. I had to read it twice because I could believe someone could be so vain, so uncaring, so vengeful towards another due to their body shape/size. This lady has an angry soul and chose to take it out on you, who in her opinion, does not share her concept of beauty. Shame on her, and congratulations to you for being professional and more than kind in your response. Self-esteem comes from within, it is not something that is branded on you. If you deserve a term at all,the words diplomatic and sincere come to mind. Your heart appears to be genuine and kind, and to people like myself…that is what really matters. Carry on John – you do a great job and many appreciate your efforts on a daily basis. I would rather sail with a Cruise Director that cared more about the well being and enjoyment of the people on his boats…than what they looked like.
I agree with Margaret. I’m constantly amazed at how rude people can be. And John is so kind in his replies.
Margaret: I was going to post a similar message for John but you said everything I wanted to say, and much better than I could have. I too was appalled at that woman’s post regarding John’s size. “Angry soul” is exactly right, and probably “lonely, threatened and sad soul” as well. Thank you for your right-on post!
Agreed. It seems the days of respect and courtesy are dwindling sadly. Although perhaps(and I mean maybe!) these things were said with the right intentions in mind (not so sure about it though) people seem to think they can persuade others by these hurtful comments into doing something different which would appear better. What people do not get is, that like any life changing undertaking, unless the individual is ready for it, no matter what people might say, the person shall do what they want. Being encouraging instead would seem a better method. I congratulate you John in your efforts to lose weight. Any amount of effort in trying to better oneself, no matter in which way, is progress for self worth. Bravo!
Maybe she’s so cranky because she’s hungry?
Thanks so much for posting that recipe for me!! Before I thought to ask you on facebook, I had emailed guest services about it and they very kindly sent me a recipe, but it served 100! And all the measurements were in pounds! We could have deciphered it, but this is so very much better. Thanks for all you do!
To Laurna Zambretta: Why do you just take a frig off pill. I remember the post you are talking about from Richard and he was just as big of an ass as you are. Anyone that states they have a magic pill for weight loss should be put behind bars. John is taking care of his weight the right way slowly but surely. The longer it takes to lose, the better chance he has of keeping it off for the rest of his life. How many of the people that were on the Bigger Loser have kept the weight off? You would be surprised that a lot of them have put the weight back on and then some. Weight manangement is very basic, calories and calories out.
And for all those people requesting a table for two people for non milestone anniversaries (though with todays throw way society it seems if you make it past two years that is something special) why not just book a table at the steak house for that special night. You do not need a table for two for a week to celebrate your anniversary.
I am one of the twits following Mr.Anderson on Twitter and I am surprised at how quickly he responds to tweets. He is having great interaction with people and hopefully he can keep it up.
Safe travels.
John, I have heard of that group. The hotel workers and restaurant workers also run when they show up.
on one of our past cruises my husband broke his nose on the pool during one of there carnival scheduled pool games, two nights later we were woken up at 3am with the heat sensor in the room going off and an automated voice on the phone telling us to go to muster station, because the air kicked off, 2 nights later we had a gentlemen trying to get into our cabin at 3am because the poor guy must have alzheimers and and he was lost. All of that in one cruise and we did not once request any kind of compensation. What is wrong with some of these people and there requests and downright rudeness?
We have been to tea-time by accidently walking by and no, we were not dressed up for it, we werent in our bathing suits but we happened on to it and stopped and had tea and cakes. So I guess if we don’t have our sunday best on we should have kept going
NOT <3
John,
It’s so sad that you (and the rest of the crew) are forced to deal with the sorry sorts that seem to only find pleasure in complaining. I’m sure they are traveling solo for any number of reasons and they may be, as you stated, lonely, causing them to act in inappropriate and rude manners. However, I really wish you’d stated that these snarky solo travelers are in the minority and that you encounter many more solos who are happy and engaging folks enjoying themselves on a brilliant holiday.(Please say this is true.) You see, I travel solo and don’t exhibit any of these nasty traits. I always have a wonderful time doing what I want when I want (that’s the solo traveler’s mantra) and am very happy to have an independent and happy frame of mind.
Please don’t lump all solo travelers into a group of snippy crazies that do and say things because they are “lonely.” I’m never lonely on a cruise ship…how could I be? There’s 2,000+ people onboard with me who are having the times of their lives. And, so am I.
Would you be so kind as to say a good word or two about the brilliant solo travelers who were engaging and lovely to the crew and you can’t wait to see walking up the gang plank? Surely there’s more that one or two of us?
Yes, there are certainly “more than one of us.” I, too, travel solo and I love it. However, I don’t think that John is lumping us all into the same category with the poor souls he mentions above. I think he’s just making the point that these folks behave the way they do because they must lead very sad, lonely lives. They are traveling solo because no one will put up with them. People that needy annoy the hell out of me, but I also have great pity for them. It’s very sad when someone’s life is so empty and they are so needy that they have to resort to tactics that make them feel important. Unlike these unfortunate people, most solo travelers travel for the same reasons that anyone else does. Although we aren’t sharing a room with someone else, we do love to get out and meet people and have new experieces and enjoy life. We don’t feel compelled to justify our existence, which, sadly, is what those people are trying to do.
I don’t know who the P2P refers to. Pax? Commedians? Performers?
What kind of tea do you drink. Hubby is tea drinker. He likes a Irish breakfast tea sometimes he adds a little rasberry for a change. Looking forward to meeting you in Nov 14.
P2P, isn’t it really me, Paul 2 Pietrangelo?
Now I like your short form John,NAS. Great idea. See if the beards will use it for themselves. Good post my friend.
Paul F. Pietrangelo
You do make me laugh! And after a long day at work I need that! And you are so gracious to people that are downright mean. Thank you and hope to cruise with you someday soon.
John…loved the reference to years ago and the dining room nightly themes etc. We first sailed on the Festivale in 1988 and enjoyed the entire dining experience so much and wish it could have stayed that way. The “crew” was fantastic, not that they aren’t good now but they were much more attentive then.We do like the 24/7 room service now, as well as the several choices for eating..back then it was the dining room or nothing..lol. We went again on the very same cruise in 1990 (both out of San Juan)…and are now platinum guests. Our next cruise is a little one in Jan. for 5 days..a “get-a-way” cruise. Love this blog and keep up the good work!!!
My parents & I will be traveling on the Paradise on Oct 10. They are both talented singers (My mother was 1st Runner up as Ms Pasadena in the Ms Sr CA pageant & Ms Congeniality in the Ms Sr CA pageant) and would like to perform in the talent show. They are concerned that they won’t be able to use their own discs for accompaniment. Can they? Please reply. Thanx & Happy Sailing!
Carnival doesn’t have a Talent Show any more. It has been replace the the Legends Show. The performers are picked in the karaoke lounge and specific parts are auditioned on different evenings. I believe the participants are selected based on audience vote.
Your parents might also enjoy the piano lounge.
According to what I’ve read, the Legends show is on 7-day cruises (My father was Frank Sinatra on a previous voyage), but the Talent Show is on 4-5 day cruises, which is wat I was refering to. John answered my question via his Facebook page. Thank you for your response though!
John I know you are worried about the hurricane. But my dear hubby said I must tell you that HER name is Irene so she can’t be a bas***d but a bi**h!
Good night
your friend
Chris
John, maybe you could “trade places” with Lisa Ball in the Med next year. With the same British accent, people might not even notice the difference.
Seriously, Lisa is friendly and approachable. We love Princess too. Next summer is British Isles on the Caribbean Princess.
John – I found your blog on “Coneheads” hilarious because when my husband and I cruise, we call people who stop right in the middle of a walkway, with total disregard for the others who were walking behind them or coming toward them, “cones” (as in “watch out, cones ahead!)
What a great label. And, it sure isn’t limited to cruise ships.
Hi John,
I used to enjoy reading all of your blog but after today, I think I will skip the Q and A section. What you write is fun and informative but can’t the beards send you more interesting messages to comment on? It seems that it’s always a rude demand, ridiculous statements about how Carnival fares compares to other lines, or a message about the latest Cruise Critic rumour. And then, every once in a while there is an extremely rude comment about your weight. It is no one’s business but your own. I am a physician. I actually have the right to comment on a patient’s weight but I would NEVER dream of saying anything in those messages that have been sent to you. Can’t they send you more interesting messages like the one that asked if you’d moonlight for another Carnival Corp cruise line? I understand they want to keep things interesting and not all sunshine and lollipops but the same rude comments are getting old and tiresome. One can only read you apologizing for something you had no control over so many times.
So my next request is for the beards. Can you please not forward those crazy emails? Can you screen them a little better and just give us the interesting ones? They don’t all have to be mean to be interesting. I’d much rather read just a few Q and A than all those ridiculous inflammatory messages. That message from Laurna just has me so upset. Please have some mercy on your brand ambassador. He is a human with feelings after all.
John
This will be perfect for the prsentation I am so thankful for all your help
Howie
We left Sunday night. Monday at dinner I began feeling sick. I skipped desert and went right to bed. By 4am, I was in so much pain that I couldn’t handle it anymore and went to the doctors (I thought I was having a heart attack). I was told that the fee would be $125, which I accepted. Thankfuly, it turned out to be nothing but a severe stomach ache. I was billed the $125 that I agreed upon and another $100 to be “admitted” (ie. to get care). I also was billed for each and every thing they did, which was okay, but I thnk they gave me a lot more tests than I needed. The bill came to almost $500. I was told that I didn’t have enough money in my account and to get more money. Needless to say, I had to cancel all the activities that I had planned for the trip. I disputed the $100 fee 3xs but had no luck having it refunded. I can’t believe that they are so desperate for money that they won’t refund that $100 excessive fee even though it means losing a customer (who uses facebook and twitter). This was my first, and last, cruise on Carnival.
John…you KNOW I remember coneheads. (and of course coning) and it makes me feel sad and just a trifle old that no one I work with now knows what a conehead is and where it came from. I imagine that we are a dying, (figuratively speaking) breed. Ah well, time marches on and waits for no one, eh? See if you cant swing a visit over to the Golden Princess soon. We are on for the entire Hawai’i season. Aloha!!
John,
Thank you again for the much needed laughter! And as a previous poster put it I to have never heard of the “pillow 2 pillow” thing, only Person 2 Person just like B2B, Business 2 Business. The pillow thing makes no freaking sense at all so kudos to you for making that clear to them in the only way you know how!!!
Laurna Zambretta, Please do me a favor and do not ever cruise again… You and your very rude comments are shameful. It is NONE of your buisness on John’s weight. I suggest you take a good gander in the mirror and see the hideous person that you are to even write such a thing.. If you have comments like that, im sure your mother tought you many yrs ago to KEEP THEM TO YOURSELF… This goes for the other Trolls who make comment’s about ones weight. You are so rude.
John, Just a thanks for keeping us updated through the Facebook thingy. I am sailing out of New York on the Glory today and taking my neice for her graduation trip–logistically a pain as she lives in Hawaii and I in Ohio. Thankfully we both arrived in New York on time yesterday and will be headed to he pier in the next couple hours. I have to say that the information passed through you was much more timely than the information I received in emails and on the Carnival website. Thanks again. Michelle M. Irons, MD
It made interesting reading about your early days on cruise ships and about the cruise culture and traditions from way back when.
I find not everything that is new is better than the “good old days”, an example being the BBC World Service. For 20 years there were great programs like Merchant Navy Progra, Science in Action, Farming World and many great comedy shows and one of the BBC main stays was Alistair Cooke’s Letter from America.
Alas they have all gone the way of the Titanic.
But there is one bright spot and that is people who are following in Alastair Cooke’s foot steps who write a daily weelky column, one of the best is:
John Heald’s Letter from a CD
Ron
To Promese Perry, that’s cutting it awful close, isn’t it? LEAVE EARLIER. I for one am tired of folks who “barely make it” everywhere they go. Grow up and be on time (that means EARLY to you) everywhere you go, and you won’t miss the boat. To Nick: No matter what I’ve asked, been told or promised, the first thing I do on any cruise ship is walk straight to the restaurant and look at my table. If I don’t like it, I change it there and then with the help of the maitre’d. I don’t wait until I’ve stumbled to it 10 minutes before I’m going to order. Grow up, people!
John I have a question to ask, and I am afraid my question might be a stupid one. I read the stories about the guests that did not have their passports with them, and could not fly to Barbados. I guess this answers my question, but I wanted to make sure I was clear. I have read some people in different forums saying do NOT take your passport into port with you, because it could get lost or stolen. They say you should take a copy of your passport into port instead. I am assuming a copy of your passport would not help you fly to Barbados. Would you recommend taking your passport with you into port? *embarrassed face*
Considering how much people travel today, and the fact that we can no longer even go to Canada without a passport, and the terrorist component, you should get one and never travel without it, if for no other reason than to save yourself trouble and possible humiliation at being mistaken for a terrorist.
As for it being stolen, do you carry your driver’s license or credit cards or cash with you? Aren’t you afraid these items might be stolen? Your best defense is to be a savvy traveler.
Once aboard leave your passport in your cabin safe. But show up at the dock with passport in hand. I’ve considered keeping mine nearby when traveling domestically.
In a effort to increase customer satisfaction, I believe all “Table Requests” should be submitted when we complete our “Fun Pass” paperwork. There should be questions about, and reservations request for The Steakhouse, and The Chef’s Table. Along with these, Carnival should post the appropiate disclaimers. These requests should be sent directly to the ship and than confirmed or denied (with an explanation) by the appropiate department.
Or, just do what other cruise lines do, and make reservations available through the Web site. Last cruise I went on (not on CCL) I made all of my reservations online before the cruise and had peace of mind that I didn’t have to scramble or tax my mojito-soaked brain with questions like, where am I going to eat tonight.
Queen Elizabeth says to sod off you sperm of the devil. As for the godmother, she wouldn’t be a cast member of Wizard of Oz, would she?
John, I have only been reading your blog for a few months, but I really think you need to delete the negative post that people continue to send you – especially the ones that are a personal attack on your weight, or “favors” they requested of you and for whatever reason it did not happen. Do these people realize you are just an ordinary guy doing a job? We are taking our adult children on their first Carnival Cruise next August (it will be our second with Carnival) and I will make sure to find the Cruise Director and thank him for all he does after reading your blogs.
Well,won’t get to join you this week, but I am on the Carnival Triumph as I type this, listening to the great music in the Capital Lobby…always great to relax a bit to recover from embarkment before engulfing in a week of fun! Will definitely keep my eye on the Magic out of Galveston to experience the best Cruise Director there is! Have a great week!
Hello John – I would appreciate hearing your thoughts to this: as you only reply to 10 pre-selected questions for each blog, I wish the selection committee would stop presenting messages that are personally insulting and degrading. It seems such a waste and I almost think most of the insults and name calling and slights concerning a person’s (namely yours) appearance are exaggerated just to get a rise out of you. They seem to think it is funny. If someone has a valid complaint about a cruise or an experience with Carnival and you publish and respond to them, then I applaud your transparency. However, there is simply no need to give valuable time and effort to respond to someone who makes such remarks. Please just ignore the personal attacks and use your valuable time to something that benefits you, your brand and your readers! Thanks for the blog and your time.
Hi John,
I love to read your blog and your outlook on cruising, etc. I feel fortunate to have taken two Carnival cruises and hope to be able to take many more. My family and I cruised on the Carnival Glory in June 2008 and had a wonderful time! My family still talks about our waiter Parta and how nice he was to all of us. Last month my husband and I sailed on the Carnival Inspiration to celebrate our anniversary and once again had a great time! The staff was friendly and was very helpful to us. We were glad to get a survey post cruise so that we could recognize the staff who went above and beyond.
What I continually find amazing reading your blog is the number of people who are so demanding or love to complain about the most minute things. When did we get to be so entitled? If something truly went horribly wrong, then of course they should seek help but some of the things people complain about are unreal. I am amazed that Carnival can handle so many people with so few problems. No matter where you go, you will encounter people who annoy you but why would you let that ruin your entire cruise. As I sat on the Serenity deck in the middle of the Caribbean, I couldn’t help but feel incredibly blessed to be there. Some of these folks should spend more time counting their blessings instead of complaining about everything and everyone.
We are hoping to do the Southern Caribbean sometime in the future and I know it will be a wonderful experience.
Oh and I am also appalled at the folks who think it’s their place to scold you about your weight and your health. As you have said, you are working on it and I for one, wish you the best of health and hapiness.
John
Why is it that when some lady is wandering around in “a you could see everything sarong” I am on another CCL ship in another ocean? It hardly seems fair to me!!
Regards
Roger T
Hey there John. I just want to let you know I think you do a great job! I also think Carnival does as well!! I think it’s sad when there are others who complain about such little things while on the ship. It angers me to hear such things when they should just be enjoying it! Also I’m not here to ask you for any favors as others do…which I think is BEYOND rude. Just here to let you know I enjoy what you and Carnival do!
Thank you!
THIS MAY BE A DUPLICATE…
I promised to let you know about our Carnival Destiny Aug 8th sailing……a couple of bumps and bruises (literally but I’ll tell you about that later!!)… Boarding process was amazing…per your help and the letter from Mischelle Beattie Coccera, the “VIPs” (along with the 17 yr old boyfriend who I was responsible for and who was on my Sign n Sail card) and the “Regulars” went to their prospective lines, then met up in the VIP room, waited for boarding to start and were all allowed on together, thus getting a great boarding picture… The table requests in the dining room were perfect… You and Desmond, the Maitre’d did a great job…Lower level Galaxy Dining Room right in the middle so we could see everything, tables 173 and 169. We all think we had one of the best wait staff team, if not the best, we have ever had, Benjamin and Dennis. By the end of the very first night, they both knew all 18 of us by name and by the 2nd night forward, Poppy had his rye bread waiting for him and I had my iceberg lettuce waiting for me!!! The kids loved them and they had a great dining room experience. Desmond is definitely a hands on Maitre’d who also visited us and made sure everything was ok… The gifts that you sent to all the cabins were met with more excitement than I have ever witnessed before… I have to tell you that although it wouldn’t have ruined our cruise, we wouldn’t have been upset or made a scene, and we wouldn’t have come back and yelled at you if we didn’t get the Champagne, Chocolate Covered Strawberries, Ships on a Stick etc, but it definitely made it so much better… Everyone really got a kick out of the surprises and really enjoyed them… Another nice gift we received from the Ocean Players Club (courtesy of my awful gambling habit) and one that I would now purchase in the future as gifts for friends cruising was the Bon Voyage Cookie box…. the best chocolate chip cookies in the world… And, the food was delicious and no one went hungry… John, one of the nicest people we have ever met on a cruise was our Hotel Director, Kevin Thorogood. What a terrific man he is… On this particular sailing, there were only 18 Milestone/Platinum cruisers. My parents, Naomi & Marty (Grandma & Poppy) were the only 2 Milestone on board and of the 16 Platinum, we were 8 of them!!! Kevin came to our dining room table 2 or 3 times that week to say hello to them, welcome us all back, asked us if everything was ok, did we need anything etc… He also sent bottles of wine to our table each night… And he says hello to his friend, you John… You and I took a couple of pictures together, which I will post on facebook when one of my daughters helps me, but unfortunately WE fell off the horse on Grand Turk and didn’t get lots of pictures after that!!! Thank goodness we rented a cabana on HMC!!! We’re ok now, but like I mentioned earlier, a couple of bruises on the tailbone OUCH…. We were also denied priority boarding from HMC back to the ship, but again, didn’t ruin our cruise…Strange thing is that my parents along with my sisters and some of the kids left before us and they were allowed to go to the front of the line without a problem. While in Nassau everyone went shopping but because I couldn’t walk, I stayed on the ship. After 21 cruises, this was a first for me, but certainly not the last… I was “hanging out” in the hot tub singing along with Tom Jones who was in concert on the big screen having a blast (ok, and showing my age too!!!)… Now I know why some passengers choose to stay on board… its so nice, peaceful, quiet, amazing etc etc etc… And one more thing… the Staff on the Carnival Destiny were absolutely amazing… One of the friendliest staff we have ever encountered. Everyone was always smiling, happy, got a good morning, have a nice day etc from every Staff Member we saw… Yes, poor Carnival Destiny is old, but she is still beautiful and we had another great family/friend cruise. Yes, their were chairhogs but we found lounges on the top deck, no big deal. Yes, during “peak” hours, the lines on Lido were extremely long… But, we were on vacation, and packed our patience… So, while I realize this is long, the feeling we have for you and Carnival is just as strong as ever and we all want to THANK YOU once again for everything you do… It is really appreciated… I just hope you know that it is the little things that you and the Carnival Staff do that have made us keep coming back for more… Luv U
To Elaine, I’ve only been on 4 cruise ships, but so far the Destiny has been my favorite. Could it be my sheeep-on-a-steeeek, or framed the photo of the ship autographed by the Captain, my picture with the Crew, or just cause we had such a frigging good time. Whatever it was, Destiny, her cast and crew were terrific. I am looking forward to learning about the Miracle in march 2012.
Also I just read above the comment from Laurna Zambrett and I am in utter DISGUST!!! John you seem like an amazing person! If you are content with yourself, that’s all that matters. Don’t even let this sad excuse of a human being even bother you. We all support you!
will you be on the glory leaving nyc 9/1/2011 to st john canada….would love to meet you
Wow Laurna! I have soooo much I would like to say to you, but can’t here….just when I thought I have seen all levels of rudeness. This was just out and out MEAN!
The new mac n cheese recipe sounds great so thanks for posting. Can’t wait to try some of the new things!
People like Laurna Zambretta have to belittle others so they can feel good about themselves as their own lives are so miserable and pathetic. Hopefully someday Laura and others like her will grow up.
John you must respond. Today!
this is totally and utterly unacceptable. What are you going to do with those tray rail-ie thingies, and my kids are going to be so disappointed. They couldn’t wait for breakfast, one would nudge the people in front of him, making them rush thru the line, and the other would hang back with mom to create this long space between, and then race up the line with a loud roaring racing sound, , hilarious… and mom acted like she didn’t know us. Where will I put my silver ware/napkin, no…, I already have two in each pocket to take home with. Plus my coffee, orange juice, water , milk, cream for the coffee, and sugar, ice water, toast, another breakfast roll, bran muffin. Ha! 113 days and I bet I won’t even be thinking about trays. Brilliant!
Actually you’ll find that most hotels etc, have stopped using trays at buffets now. They’ve all been replaced by plates at the various stations. It might be a bit of a bugger not being able to take all the food in one go to your table, but at least that little bit of exercise gets you set up for the next round
John, I feel so sad to think that Ms.Zambretta thinks she can say those very hurtful things to you. I gained a lot of weight starting at age 21, Over the next 30 years I had a huge amount of health problems. I blamed it on the bad air in the city and on the hormones in the food or anything else I could think of. Then I became a type 2 diabetic. So I became educated about the effects of diabetes. Which to put it bluntly SCARED THE HELL OUT OF Me! So I have been working on myself for over two years now. And after eating less and eating bunny food and exercising
I was still not in control. What I have found is that it was Stress that was making me gain weight more than anything else.
You have more stress in your job the a brain surgeon. It isn’t just sugar or salt or fat that makes us gain weight, its medications and lack of sleep and constant stress. I wish you well. I can see by the numbers you have posted that you are getting in control of things. Keep up the good work and enjoy your time with your family. Don’t let people like Laurna get to you.
Smile Once For Me. Sharon
P.S. I have reduced myself by 90 lbs. and only have 70 to go.
Hello
John where are the number of Aussies on the boat???
Anyway you do a great job on the boat and we are very happy you were on the boat when we are!!!
Thanks
Dear Promese Perry: I have 2 words for you TRAVEL INSURANCE. It would have covered some of this (if not all).
Hi John:
I have a question re: the Serenity Deck. When it was first introduced it seemed like a wonderful innovation. At that time there was a fee either for the morning hours or the afternoon ones. I’ve been reading on the blog about chair hogs there also.
My question is: how is this possible? If there are X amount of chairs, why isn’t there a limit to how many spaces can be sold. This seems to indicate that the area is being over-booked. Is this what is happening? Would you please take the time to explain this. I just can’t figure what people are complaining about. I really was looking forward to using the Serenity Deck but now I’m apprehensive…
On the Freedom a few weeks ago and the Splendor last Sept. there was no charge for the Serenity area. It is just a quiet no kids area to relax. Are you maybe confusing this with the spa area that does charge?
You should post a sign on the gangway during embarkation that reads: “Everyone who walks this way brings joy. Some as they enter. Others as they leave. Which will you be?”
Would be nice if people learned that if you treat the “team members” with a little respect and decency – they will treat you like Queens and Kings.
Thanks for posting the Macaroni & Cheese recipe. I’m going to try it for the next family dinner. My niece makes a very good Mac n Cheese casserole but I think this one is going to knock her’s out of the water! Wish me luck!!
Suggestion for a ”beards” ( as John calls them ). Why you do not try living at least for a week in CCL crew o staff cabin , dine in their dining areas ? It would be VERY EDUCATIONAL and HEALTHY for you. Maybe after that you would raise a core salary for cabin cleaners and restaurant staff, which right now is around 50 $ a month , forbid smoking inside the ship where people work and are exposed for a cigars and cigarettes smoke for hours (who cares, if your staff will get all kind of cancers as long as there is a revenue made ?). On the ships majority of people barely have time to eat and sleep , are not going outside for a months because of they busy schedules , stress and tiredness. Your billions are made dirty way, as, probably in most corporations. Corporate America- hopefully you will wake up one day and will STOP this modern day slavery
P.s John, thank you for your blog – it is educational (peek about what is ”behind the scenes” ) and funny.
Are you for real or one of John’s friendly trolls? This has got to be one of the stupidest comments I have ever read on this blog.
The days of pirates and shanghaied – crew are long gone. Your stateroom steward is offered opportunity they are not provided in their home culture and are typically there because they choose to be, for several contracts lasting years. You should focus your aggression to the guest that feels it necessary to lodge false complaints and remove the gratuities that allow the service staff their salary.
Dear John,
Carnival has just received three (3) new ships and I really can’t remember Princess getting any new ones so to be fair Princess should get the next ship. Unless he intends to put it on the Left Coast then it should be Carnival. I am greedy that way.
The Cruzin2some
I am appalled at the way some people write to you: either as if you are a genie and can grant their every wish* or as though you are sub-human! I am shocked, and I apologize on behalf of all the imbiciles.
I am cruising on the Carnival Valor (cruised the Dream last Dec., loved it and are coming back!) in 5 days and can’t wait! My wife and I are celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary AND my graduation from grad school. I can’t wait to be on the ship!
Thanks for the blog and again, my apologies.
(* just in case you are a genie, we’d like a few bottles of bubbly in the room, along with $1m (US) to spend at ports and a cure for cancer. Thanks!)
Likewise John, if you are a genie, please loosen up the slots here on the Triumph! Its time to start winning! We promise to use the winnings on the next cruise. Gonna try the meatloaf tonight…getting desperate on some nights menu choices!
Great blog today John. Pillow to pillow my arse….
Every now and then I think that I have seen the most rude person ever post on your blog. However, today Laurna Zambretta has to take the cake. I would rather be fat than rude.
Fat people can diet (and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t). You just can’t fix rude and stupid!
Your friend from Texas,
Larry Meador
JOHN PLEASE READ THIS!
I did a Google search on your Laurna Zambretta. You will notice many many times she comes up on your blog as a rude comment filled troll. I recommend installing some de-troll stuff on your computer so you and the rest of us won’t be subjected to her extreme form of rudeness.
Hello Dorothy Lamont,, whoo so happy you will not be on the Legend in October…. a few of us are going for TEA and wearing our tiara’s, some of the group have the real thing (phony stones) where mine lets say.. is the poverty kind, plastic , spray painted jewels and from the buck store. Our own queen will be with us… you would jump ship if you knew. Dear I am on holidays, i get dressed for dinner..I behave when i need to but have lots of fun the timing is correct.
all my boats are in the harbour
John, my wife, my 3-yr old son and I all love your blog and your Facebook page. With all the time we spend on your pages, my son is now a Carnival fanatic as seen in this video which I sent you the other day. Figured I would share it with some of my blog friends:
https://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=2414170436605
Brilliant Blog! I am LMAO.
Dwayne
Hi John,
We’ve just been on the Carnival Magic and had a great time. I have to say I’m disgusted with the comments from Laurina about your weight. I don’t think anyone has the right to judge or comment on someone’s physical (or mental) appearance without knowing that person or their history etc. Keep true to yourself. Again, we had a wonderful time, thankyou.
Hi John really enjoy your blog! We will be sailing on the Magic on Oct 16th if all goes as planned. This will be my 8th Carnival Cruise & my youngest’s 4th. We think Carnival is the best! On the CD site it says you are the cruise director but I think you had a post that says you’re not. Will you be there? We’d love to know…
John…the is a posting on CC that you’ve probably seen concerning is everyone feels sorry for you having to put up with the idiots who post on your blog. For example, the clown who is looking for compensation for missing his cruise due to an accident. My answer whould have been…”Leave home earlier!” No one’s fault but your own. Or the “lady” who complained about your weight. Can’t believe that was a real post because I can’t believe someone could be so cruel. Or the fool complaining he didn’t get a table for 2. He doesn’t understand he can request that table when he boards or just use Anytime Dining. Again, people don’t want to take responsibility for their own mistakes. Unreal!
Laurna Zambretta, you are a j@><! (not a nice person). IF you had read any of this blog before you would know John is trying to lose weight. It's easy for some but hard for others. I'm not obese but was only 20 over. I lost 10 easy but the last 10 has been difficulty. It's good to know that some people like you have things to easy. Have a NICE day!
Actually I might have either my conspiracy theorist head or my Hercule Poirot (or for those Americans out there Nero Wolfe) head on, but I think that either Laura and “Richard” are the same person or that Laura is part of the same company as Richard. How do I work this out. Now I didn’t read all the bits on the blog, but did anyone actually mention the guy’s actual name. I can’t remember for the life of me the name being mentioned. So why is she calling him Richard?? Unless she meant to use his shorter name – D1ck
I think that either she is him (an internet term for this is a Sock) or she works with him closely (probably his manager or something.) BTW You say you are losing weight albeit slowly. Well apparently this is the best way to lose weight. If you lose weight too quickly it can cause problems. But if you come down slowly then you won’t have any problems.