Emmit, Al and John

July 7, 2008 -

John Heald

The two Californian guests I met this morning were nice enough people but by the look on their faces when I met them in the lobby I knew their demand to see me was not to discuss Europe’s historic architecture or to compliment me on my show last night. They had called the Purser’s Office and told them they would be waiting for me outside of the Piano Bar and would not be leaving until I came to meet them.

Strange…………….maybe they wanted to audition……………..nope……………..I arrived and even before I had chance to extend my hand in the usual manner of greeting she started.

“What,” stammered the first, staring at the ashtray, “is that?” If you’d asked them to list all the things they’d least expect to find on a table an ashtray would line up alongside a copy of War and Peace……….in Mongolian… They would have been less surprised if they’d been confronted with a tap dancing frog.

For all their adult life, these guys have lived in Los Angeles where you can no more smoke in a public place than take of all your clothes and run around Macy’s shouting “I love Neiman Marcus” before urinating in the cash register.

Now, of course, in America, it’s very easy to enforce laws like the smoking ban because this is a nation where people make friends in lifts. So if you light a cigarette on a beach, for instance, you will be shamed into putting it out by a combination of dirty looks and threatening gestures from those in smelling distance.

I once again explained that the Piano Bar is one of just three entertainment locations that allow smoking but I knew straight away that resistance was futile so there I stood for 15 minutes listening to her comments. I knew that short of banning smoking on the entire ship immediately and promising to publicly flog anyone caught smoking……….I knew nothing I would say would make her happy. So, I apologized ……..promised that persons on high would hear her comments.
So, once again the subject of smoking has arisen…………..maybe she is right ………….. maybe she is wrong…………………it is certainly a continuing concern and one we need to address again.

Well, it’s a day at sea and I am extra busy today…………..here is a quick look at my schedule and after reading it I expect lashings of sympathy and lots of ahhhss.

8:00AM – MEETING WITH STAFF
9:00AM – MORNING SHOW
10:00AM – MEETING WITH GUESTS – RE SMOKING
10:15AM – CAPERS PREPARATION
11:00 AM – HOST MARRIAGE SHOW
11:45 AM – ANSWER COMMENTS FROM BLOG AND 100 PLUS E MAILS
1:00 PM – HOST LIDO FUN HOP
1:30 PM – RETURN TO E MAILS AND PHONE CALLS
2:15 PM – HOST GAME SHOW
3:15 PM – MEETING WITH REPORTER
4:00 PM – BLOG
5:00 PM – CHANGE FOR FORMAL NIGHT AND HOST 2 PARTIES
8:30 PM AND 10:30 PM – SHOWTIME
MIDNIGHT -COMPLETE BLOG
1:00AM – GOODNIGHT

What you have just read is an excuse basically…………an excuse that today’s blog is rather on the short side. I apologize for this and tomorrow we will be back to normal.

The good news is that the WaterWorks water park opened today…………the bad news is ………..the weather is really cold…………..60 degrees…………..and that is unusual for this time of year here.

Have a look at these photos which will show the difference 24 hours make.

Well, Stephanie and Tom are here and I shall take advantage of their skills by asking them to slap on this video of me and a guest from last night’s show.

Enjoy it.

Goodnight
From a slightly tired but happy John and Heidi

Hi, I’m John, and this is my blog. So please don’t mistake my opinions — or those of my dear friends, fans or commenters — for those of Carnival Cruise Line or Carnival Corporation. My apologies in advance for anything I may say that upsets you, but this disclaimer covers Carnival and puts the blame directly on me………….. bugger.