A Short Blog But With A Long Video

January 16, 2009 -

John Heald

Modern history is littered with glorious technical failures.

You may, for instance, remember the laser disc. It was a one-foot wide silver record which, said the geeks, would replace the videocassette. I damn nearly bought one, at vast expense, even though there were a few drawbacks. Like you couldn’t record anything on it, and any fast-moving image always “ghosted,” which was a bit of a problem because the only film originally available on laser disc was the very fast-moving Top Gun.

Before this, there was the saga of Betamax. Technically superior to the standard videocassette, it is still used by television companies as the medium on which programs are recorded. Many people bought Beta machines, but then the American porn industry decided to go with the VCR and, as a result, they were left with square holes into which the round peg of expedience wouldn’t fit. Well, I have another addition to the list …… Microsoft Windows Word Pad and the Sony Vaio computer. ………that’s because even though I pressed save a dozen times, it dumped the blog which had taken me two bloody hours to write. I am glad you were not here because the air was blue with swear words in English, Dutch, Italian and even the only rude word I know in French……….Le Soap.

Anyway, after crying my eyes out and throwing the laptop around my office, I decided rather than spend the next two hours trying to remember what I wrote not to bother. Besides, we are going out for a last romantic dinner tonight before I leave on Monday and I don’t have enough time. So, please forgive me for the short blog but I did make a 40 minute video which includes verbal answers to those with outstanding questions …. it was made in a rush and with no hair or make up assistance as you will see. ….I hope you enjoy it.

Sorry everyone but we’re having some techinical difficulties. The video will be posted as soon as possible.

Tomorrow morning I will write the blog intended for today and I shall do so on the companies Dell computer as the Sony is heading for a journey up Mr. Gates’ bottom.

Tomorrow’s blog will feature some great photos of the rock ’n roll cruise on the Carnival Destiny and new photos of the Carnival Paradise fresh out of dry dock. Oh, just in case I forget, I want to say goodbye to an old friend……..George Bush. Next will be a very busy one for me so I wanted to bid a fond farewell to old George W. I have always tried to…..with the exception of my thoughts on global warming……..tried to keep the blog politically free of opinion and that’s not going to change now. However, I defy anyone to watch one of those internet Best Of Bushisms………you know, the gaffes and bloopers of the outgoing president, without a sense of wonderment at his constant battles with the English language.

No longer will the White House be inhabited by a man who blissfully jumbles Slovakia and Slovenia and we say goodbye to the global strategist whose cruise directorish sunny out look on life still has him thinking that Japan and America have “had a peaceful alliance for 150 years” – something of a revelation, one imagines, to the people of Pearl Harbor or Hiroshima. And we say goodbye to the President who said live on TV to a unmarried mother of two. “I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family,” he told her, and we can all attest to that, especially when the little buggers won’t keep still ………..yep…….as I said I don’t want to talk politics ……everyone has their opinions ……… but one thing is for sure………… George W Bush was someone who provided us with wonderful moments of unscripted fun………..and for that…………I will miss him.

Your friends
John, Heidi and the Thingy

Hi, I’m John, and this is my blog. So please don’t mistake my opinions — or those of my dear friends, fans or commenters — for those of Carnival Cruise Line or Carnival Corporation. My apologies in advance for anything I may say that upsets you, but this disclaimer covers Carnival and puts the blame directly on me………….. bugger.