Tales Of The Unexpected

February 25, 2010 -

John Heald

I have mentioned before in this blog thingy that I find the thought of a skiing vacation about as exciting as two weeks in Chernobyl.

It seems that the guests here on your Carnival Dream don’t care too much for it either. I was expecting a lot of requests for various events to be played on the Seaside Theatre Big Screen but apart from the Canada vs USA Ice Hockey Boxing Contest…….nobody seems to care. I wonder then if the Winter Olympics are purely for the lovers of snow and ice and those who like to watch a big woman slowly slides a kettle down the ice while an even bigger woman cleans the ice with a brush.

I was forced to watch last night while I sat here in between shows, in my underpants and watched some mad Dutchman speed skater take instructions from his coach who was on speed…….and therefore direct poor old Sven Van Buggered onto the wrong track …… and he was disqualified. Heidi was sad. I laughed. Heidi kicked me in the bollocks. I cried.

While they were waiting for the race to start NBC did a nice promo for Vancouver which the commentator said had a fantastic quality of life and that the threat of terrorism is low. Is that how a city is judged these days? Not by its infrastructure, roads, education and health system and number of Latvian Lap Dancing clubs? Actually I don’t think NBC did any favours to Vancouver because the way he described it the possibilities of being stabbed, shot or blown up by Abdul and his mates are low……….the chances of dying from boredom are extremely high. And I am sure that’s not true…….right Vancouvians?

Everyone was saying that the Canadian hospitality had been extraordinary and that does not come as any surprise as the Canucks I know are all wonderful, kind hearted people. But why is nobody, outside of hockey fans, requesting coverage on the big screen?

Well, maybe it’s time to bring back the greatest Winter Olympian of all time…….. Eddie the Eagle ……one of those lovable British losers that we produce with seemingly worrying regularity. He did get a bit annoying after a while. Regardless of the fact that he had jumping abilities of a dead kangaroo I respected him because ski jumping takes courage and although everyone who mentioned him collapsed with laughter…….. he has my respect.

The Winter Olympics needs more characters and events where the average person in the street can take part. When it snowed in the olden days, everyone had snowball fights and that’s what we should have in the Olympics. Canada vs. USA snowball fights. Famous Americans like George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Megan Fox and Lady Ga Ga vs. famous Canadians like ……..ummmmm………..ummmm………Tim Horton and Bryan Adams.

That might create some interest because I put some Olympic coverage on the Seaside Theatre last night and apart from a deck steward and some chap who was either asleep or dead on a deck chair………….nobody was there. And yet, two hours later I played the Michael Jackson This Is It movie…………..and 400 people were enthralled.

Time for today’s questions………..off we go.

Shawn Asked:

Thank you for all that you do! Really enjoy the blog thingy. Me, my wife, and 7 year old son will all be PLATINUM cruisers on the Triumph on February 13th! We will be celebrating my son’s 8th birthday as well.

I’ve been reading the blog thingy for a while now and this is my first request and only request. We would like to have a particular server in the dining room. The only reason I ask you is that I did ask the Maitre’d on our last cruise and our request was not granted, in fact, we were never even contacted (not complaining, just explaining). I am hoping that you will be able to pull of few strings. We are in cabin 7382 and would love to have a small booth type table with Team Head Waiter Tommy Malang during early seating. We had him on our Thanksgiving cruise and he and his assistant (Rudi) were the best we have ever had. I would appreciate your help if you can.

Hopefully, we will have the honour (yes spelled correctly) of sailing with you one day soon!

John Says:
Hello Shawn

I am so glad you enjoy the blog thingy but you might be a little upset at me because I just saw this request and obviously I did not get to it in time. I can only hope that you managed to at least meet Tommy who I know very well and maybe got lucky and had him again. Please forgive me and let me know if you can what happened.

Best wishes and my apologies once again


Bruce Lange Asked:
Hello John! Please reply

Love your blog. It’s a hoot! The reason I’m writing is that the family and I are departing on the Carnival Dream March 6. We’re all very excited, in particular my oldest son. We will be sailing on his 12th birthday and the Mrs. is saying good-bye to the 30’s. Do you have any suggestions that could really make this a memorable cruise for both of them?

Looking forward to your reply!

John Says:
Hello Bruce

I will do my best to make sure your cruise is a fun one even though March 6 is the day the girls go home. Please leave me a letter telling me something about your wife and son and when their birthdays are and I will make sure I mention them at the Morning Show. You can leave the “Dear John” letter at the guest services desk.

I promise you will love your Carnival Dream and I will see you all soon.

Best wishes

Larry Meador Asked:
John, Please Reply

We are going on our 8th Carnival Cruise on the Miracle on April 5, 2010. (This will be my 10 year old’s 6th Carnival Cruise). Our Cruise Director is listed as Josh Waitzman on the Cruise Director schedule. I cannot find that you have done an interview with him and Cruise Critic is essentially absent of any information on him. (All I found was one small posting where someone said he made too many announcements about the day’s events, and the writer alluded to his name being Josh “Big Sexy” Waitzman). The announcements don’t bother me, because I appreciate the announcements. I’m going to remain as neutral as possible on the “Big Sexy” part…..   :<)

What can you tell us about him?

P.S. My son is still telling people about the awesome 10th birthday he had on the Carnival Spirit thanks to you and the Spirit crew. Thanks again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

John Says:
Hello Larry Meador

Josh AKA Big Sexy is a terrific chap and part of our shining new crop of cruise directors and as requested here he is in his own words to tell you a little about himself. First of all though, let’s have a look at his ummmmm…….Big Sexy …….. ummmmm …….. face. I feel dirty having typed that……….I’m going for a shower.

I was born one miserably cold Chicago day, January 5, 1977 and still reside there as do my entire family and friends.  The ironic thing about my position is that I come from a family of teachers, lawyers, and doctors, and have the privilege of “playing” out at sea and being the black sheep of the group (you know there’s always one).  I can confidently say though that my career choice didn’t come as easily to me as it did the rest of the Waitzman clan…

I fell in love with cruising and being out at sea when I was 14 years old.  My parents took myself, my younger brother, and two younger sisters on a cruise down to the Western Caribbean.  I loved the experience of being on the ship, and when I somehow managed to sneak into the disco one night with a group of 18 year old girls, unfortunately, it was my mother who walked in, busted me, and threw me out!  It was at that exact moment where I learned how to play blackjack in the casino…

Later on in life, I attended Illinois State University.  It was there where I joined and became a social chair and house manager for Sigma Chi fraternity, took all sorts of theater and drama classes, and went through the other monotonous daily routines of college life.  While on paper I was a business major, deep down in my heart I knew that the corporate world just wasn’t for me.  I never could have imagined that the skills I acquired then would be essential for my inevitable career later on…

After school, while trying to start a “real” life, I spent five years as an executive pension and employee benefit recruiter, bought a house, and got married (and divorced… long story).  That entire time, for the mere fun of it, I was hosting karaoke shows at night for a friend who owned a DJ and Karaoke company.  It was then where I realized how much I enjoyed hosting, performing, and being in front of a crowd.  Still, I never had any idea of what my future held until I went on another cruise with the family in February of 2004 and my Grandmother mentioned that since I was a natural performer and love being at sea so much, I should work on cruise ships (or “big boats” as she called them).  It was shortly afterwards where I applied to Carnival and was thrust into my first positions at sea as a karaoke and social host on the Holiday in the Spring of 2004.  It was only at that point where I had an epiphany of what I TRULY wanted to do with my life….

Since the Holiday 5 years ago, I’ve had the honor of doing contracts as part of the Entertainment Staff on the Destiny and Elation, and as an assistant Cruise Director on the Elation, Victory, Miracle, Ecstasy, and Freedom.  I have taken over as Cruise Director on the Elation and Miracle and am currently at the helm on the Imagination.

My Grandmother has since passed away, but I’ll always remember her saying that if you sincerely love what you do, you’ll never have to work a day in your life… well, if that’s true, I haven’t worked in a very long time.  I honestly believe that I have the best position in the world, and I am honored to be able to work for this company.  Ultimately, I am looking forward to many more years (and “big boats”) to come!

Thanks’ Josh and apart from (like all the new CD’s ) forgetting the word “Carnival” in front of the names of the ships….that was an excellent bio. I have not see Josh work on stage onboard but I have seen him in action at our big New York event last year and he was absolutely superb and had the crowd involved all day long. I am sure you will have a brilliant time with him and the rest of the Carnival Miracle crew and please send him my best regards.

Have a wonderful time
Best wishes

Jay Edie (Cruise Addict) Asked:
Hi John!! (Please Reply)

I’m glad to see you are getting back into the swing of things. While you are great at doing all the “Brand Ambassador” stuff, it seems you are forever the consummate CD.

Now that the “Brown Nosing” is done, on to my reason for writing today.

Marie and I have two really close friends sailing with you on your February 20th voyage.

They are Kim Raguso & Ann Raguso. They have really been good to us, and Ann has known Marie since she was a baby. They have been there when we really needed a good friend. They, like you, know what friendship really means.

Kim is a Platinum Cruiser with Carnival, and Ann (her mother) is getting close.

They have cruised with you before on a European run, but that was a while ago.

I was telling Kim how much of a good guy you are and how you have been such a great friend to Marie and me, even though you really don’t know us.

I told Kim, “You’ve got to meet this man!”. So, if you have time, and I know you may not. Please send them a personal note of welcome.

I do not know their Booking Number or Cabin Number, but Kim is on the VIP Listing.

Thank you for doing this if you get the chance, and thanks for your Kindness.

Jay Edie (cruise addict)

John Says:
Dear Jay Edie:

Great brown nosing by the way. I just sent a little something and a note to your friends and I hope they enjoy it. I am sure they are having a great time, the weather has been good and the response at the shows has been excellent. I just tried calling their cabin but they were out and will try again soon. I hope they had a great time.

Thanks for all the kind words
Best wishes

Michele Maragni Asked:
Hi John, (Please Reply)

Remember me Michele, from the Bloggers cruise! First let me say, Mom and I enjoyed every minute we spent with you! Oh John, I better rephrase that! ha! ha! Mom and I enjoyed being with you! Oh shucks, forget that too! ha! ha! (if Heidi reads this what will she think?) ha! ha!( thank god Mom is 81, ha! ha!) Ok let me start again, Mom and I are so happy for you, that your two beautiful ladies will be joining you soon! , wish Mom and I could be there also! hopefully we will make it to another of your Blogger Cruises! and hopefully with my Best friends Linda & Mike, which may I ad, I am so very excited Linda,( my Best friend in the whole world!) & I will finally be cruising together on the Carnival Miracle in Dec. Now my question, I will be cruising on the Carnival Liberty, April 24th, with a special friend, whom I help take care of, she will be 86 yrs old, she is from Australia, her name is Sybil, and this is her first cruise! I was wondering if it possible, to send her a little Birthday gift, she is so wonderful, and would be so supprised! I am not the type to ask for things, but I know, how excited she would be! Thank You so much John! Love to You Heidi & Kye

John Says:
Hello Michele Maragani

Of course I remember you Michele and I hope you have some great memories of the bloggers cruise. I know that I have been slow in organizing another Bloggers cruise and I must get my bottom in gear and do that soon. I read Big Ed’s poll as to where and when the cruise should be and I will certainly be taking that and others wishes into consideration.

I would be honoured to treat your 86 year old first timer and please send me a reminder with the cabin number no later than April 1st and I will make it so. I am glad you asked so please don’t worry about doing so and I know you will both have a brilliant time. I will be seeing Mike and Linda on Saturday and will send them your kind regards.

Best wishes to all.

missingthesmokefreeparadise Asked:
JOHN – Please Reply

>>>At night they can see everything as I discovered when I walked from the bedroom to the office as naked as the day I was born…..and bent over to get a bottle of water out of the refrigerator……… and realized as I stood up that a guest was looking right at me. His face showed the horrors of someone who had just seen me naked, bending over and as I closed the curtains in true panic I knew that his cruise………..indeed his life……….would never be the same again.

Where do I send the psychotherapy invoices for payment? I may never get this scene out of my mind.

John Says:
Hello Missingthesmokefreeparadise

All claims of damages should be sent to my lawyer who is half Jewish and half Japanese …….. his name is “So Su Mi.”

Best to you and Mrs. MTSFP

retirementman Asked:

Well John, MaryLou and I have returned to old Amherstburg, Ontario, Canada after having a wonderful cruise on our Carnival Dream.( Jan. 23rd – Jan. 30th 2010 ) I want to thank you, Captain Marino and all the wonderful workers on the Carnival Dream for giving us such a fantastic vacation.

I’ve been a very lucky man to have had a chance to spend last year before we left on our cruise on the Carnival Valor with you and this time on the Carnival Dream again having an opportunity to spend some time again with you. I hope that you enjoyed our birthday gifts and we totally enjoyed the gifts we received in our cabin. We will never forget the time we’ve had on this wonderful ship. I’m already planning another cruise next year on the Carnival Miracle and I know that we will probably never see each other again but I just want to say that Carnival has the best representative for the company in you, John Heald, Cruise Director and Ambassador for Carnival. Thank you once again for showing me how cruising is the one best way for having a great vacation. Say Hi to Heidi and give Kye a great big kiss from me.

Paul and MaryLou Pietrangelo
Amherstburg, Ontario

John Says:
Hello Paul and Mary Lou Pietrangelo

I just wanted to say what an honour (spelt correctly) it was to sit and chat with you both throughout the week. You have been a long supporter of the blog thingy and I hope that it won’t be long before we get to say hello to you both again onboard a fun for all ship.

Thanks so much for all the kind words.

Best wishes to you and the family

Marsha Breen Asked:
John – please reply.

John – it was good to see you last week and I hope you are enjoying being “back in the saddle” as CD. We had a great time on the Carnival Dream despite the high winds and missed port. The ship is beautiful and we really enjoyed the new shoes and the Comedy Club. The food was great, as usual, and every staff member we came in contact with was extremely friendly and courteous. Once we got home yesterday, I was catching up on all your blogs I had missed while on the ship. Being an Indianapolis Colts fan, I just wanted to add my “two cents” about the playoff games on the Seaside Theatre screen. The reason people were upset about there being no sound was because it was advertised in the Capers that it would be shown on the big screen but it didn’t state there would be no sound. That deck was extremely crowded with people showing up 2-3 hours early in order to get a seat to watch the games. The Capers failed to mention that there would be no sound for the first part of the game – it was only announced just prior to the game starting that this would occur. I think if it had been written in the Capers that there wouldn’t be sound, then people would have made other arrangements to watch the game elsewhere or at least wouldn’t have been so upset. That still does not excuse anyone approaching a staff member and taking their frustration out on them. There was absolutely no excuse for that and I am appalled that this happened. One question for you: Do you happen to know if the 2 girls who missed the ship in Cozumel and were supposed to catch up with the ship in Costa Maya ever made it back to the ship somehow since we had to miss that port????

John Says:
Hello Marsha Breen

I am glad to read that you had a great time on your Carnival Dream cruise. I wish I could have been your Cruise Director but I am sure you had a great time with Todd. It certainly was a mistake to publish in the Carnival Capers that the football game would be shown on the big screen at the same time as Lido deck bingo. This caused Todd to have to play the game without sound, which upset many, however, as you so correctly said, it certainly did not give anyone the right to abuse the staff in the way one or two guests did. It was certainly a lesson learned. Thank you for your kind words and my best wishes to you and your family.


Ryan Bloom Asked:

I need a table reservation for my cruise on the Liberty on March 6th. I will be in suite 7329 and want a table on the late sitting for two. Last year we cruised on Princess and the table we had made our cruise and I hope Carnival can match the experience. I have also read that you arrange anniversary celebrations and it will be our 33rd anniversary on the 9th. Please arrange a chocolate cake to be delivered at our table not in our suite as a surprise for my wife.

Ryan Bloom, Freehold New Jersey.

John Says:
Hello Ryan

Thank you for taking the time to write to me and I am happy that you have decided to try Carnival Cruise Lines. I see that you have cruised on Princess before and I know how great their product is so we will do our best to match that and exceed your expectations. I will certainly do my best to help you with your table request and will ask the Maitre D on the Carnival Liberty to see what can be done. As for the cake request I will not be able to do that. While I will be happy to send your wife an anniversary surprise the cake will need to be ordered through our bon voyage department at carnival.com or from onboard via the Celebrations shop on Promenade Deck 5. I hope you understand and I hope you have a great cruise.

Best wishes to you both

John LoConte Asked:
Hi John! (Please Reply)

You should have told the lady who complained about the cove balcony that you would have a staff member drain some of the water out of the sea ASAP! I’m sure this would have made her happy 🙂 haha… Thanks so much for the help with the Roatan cabana’s… We will be on the Dream in 5 days for the Super Bowl which leads me to my question/statement… PLEASE show the Super Bowl in full audio! Also… will you be showing the Super Bowl in full audio on the lido? Can’t wait to meet you! Hopefully you won’t be bent over nude when we do meet!

John Says:
John LoConte,

Sorry for the late reply to your posting but I hope you had fun during your Super Bowl cruise, here on your Carnival Dream. It was a great week. I loved your comment about the cove balcony…………very funny. Hope to see you again soon.

Best Wishes,

Amy James Asked:
John (Please reply if possible),

My husband will be celebrating his birthday on the 6/14/10 sailing of the Glory to Canada. And as I am struggling with what to get him, I thought he might enjoy the Behind the Fun Tour – he has been dying to see the bridge and engine room ever since we started cruising with you all in 2007. Is it true that the only way I can make reservations for this tour is to be early to the Excursion Desk at Embarkation? We are not yet Platinum and I worry about it being sold out.

I appreciate your help. And thank your for this blog – while I cannot cruise as often as I like, your blogging keeps me feeling connected, and is always good for a laugh.

Amy James.

John Says:
Amy James,

Congratulations on choosing to celebrate your husband’s birthday on the Carnival Glory. The Behind the Fun tour has proven to be very popular across the fleet and the best way to make sure your husband gets to experience it is to book it as soon as you come on board at the shore excursion desk which is located on Deck 3, Lobby. I am glad you enjoy the blog and a month before you sail, maybe you can send me your husband’s details so I can send him a birth day treat. Best wishes, John.

That’s all for today and thank you again for all the great comments. I want to say a special thank you to Caroline and Don who, knowing Kye was on board, booked a last minute cruise so they could meet her and Heidi and next week their great friends Big Ed and his wife Pat have also booked to sail. Kye is a superstar!

OK, it’s trivia time…….lets see who knows the answer to this question.

Thanks to one of the 343 Stephanie’s ( Stephanie H ) we now have the ability to conduct a poll here on the blog thingy. This weeks poll is very important and I will let Stephanie tell you how to answer. The results will be looked at by those at the top with beards so please take the time to answer.

Hi bloggers. The poll will be located on the right hand column of www.johnhealdsblog.com. All you have to do is select your answer and hit submit. Let me know if you have any questions. 🙂

Stephanie H

Somebody directed me to a thread thingy on the cruise boards about Ken Byrne, the industry’s best and most popular Maitre ‘D. I won’t even honour (spelt correctly) them by discussing what they said. I will tell you this, Ken’s daughter is due to give birth any day and he will become a proud grandfather. He will then return to work, joining the Carnival Legend in April where those guests who are cruising will all get to experience his outstanding hospitality, his Irish wit and of course his velvet voice.

So, yesterday I received this comment.

As you know, the cruise ship industry has unfairly been labeled as the main source of Norovirus, even though this can be found in any area on land where large crowds gather. One of the reasons the cruise ship industry has this mantel is because we report all such cases to the Center for Disease Control (CDC) and United States Public Health, as well as the Toilet Paper Manufacturers of the World (TPMW).

Seriously though, I have been on a ship where we have indeed have an outbreak and I will never forget that Carnival Liberty transatlantic crossing and I never want to go through that again. Ever since then, I have reminded guests over the P.A. system and at my Fun On Board, Fun Ashore talk that the best way to prevent stomach illness is the constant washing of hands with warm water and soap. I also remind guests that hand sanitizer units are located at the gangways and outside the self service buffet lines on Lido, outside both dining rooms, the internet cafe, Sushi bar and in the lobby. And it seems to have worked because ever since the Carnival Liberty’s outbreak in 2007, I have not been on board a ship where this has happened again. I am now touching wood, taking off all my clothes, spinning around in a circle naked so as not to jinx myself.

Yet, after all times I have made these announcements, this complaint was the first I have ever received and I was flabbergasted at how upset my son and daughter were. I say this because I wasn’t trying to be their “father” but someone who cares about them and didn’t want them to spend their cruise with sickness and what we English call “ring sting.”

So I spoke to them in person and tried to explain myself that I had their best interest at heart. I knew I was going to get nowhere though because my son had a beard and went on to tell me he was a medical student at Anthony Hopkins Hospital University or something like that. He told me that, not only did he not need to be told what to do on his vacation but that it was the ship’s job to make sure that cleanliness levels prevented any stomach problems.

I promised him that our cleanliness was of the highest order and that we took this subject extremely seriously. I also mentioned that another cruise line had reported 300 alleged Norovirus cases this week and I was sure that their cleanliness procedures were just as good, yet they still had 300+ unwell passengers. His answer to this was to simply curse and turn his back and walk away. I am sure he is a brilliant scientist and will graduate with honours but in the University of Life he gets a D for manners.

So, here is my question. Am I right to do this? Do I come across as someone trying to be your “father?” Do you need to be told to wash your hands and use the hand sanitizers? As you can see, I am second guessing myself again and would appreciate your help in deciding whether or not to continue these announcements.

A letter like that is always unexpected and they do say that the unexpected comes in threes. So the washing the hands thing was number one……..let’s have a look at number two.

Sent: Tuesday, February 23, 2010 2:21 PM


Subject: Cancelled Tours – Isla Roatan – DR07 022010

Good Afternoon,

Please be advised that the following tours have been cancelled due to large numbers of jelly fish on the beach.

Can you kindly process an automatic refund on the below tour numbers.

Port of Call                : Isla Roatan

Tour ID                       : 518-012-1030-1,2,4,5

Name of Tour             : Tabyana Beach Break

Yep, sodding jelly fish. Hundreds of the little buggers. Actually there were not little as some were as big as a small dog. Luckily the tour operator checked the beach before we sent the guests and we were able to cancel the excursion, give our guests a full refund and book those who wished on another excursion. That’s the benefit of booking through the ship and it meant nobody walked away having been stung.

So, that was number two. How about number three. Well for that we need to go to last night’s talent show and Mary McFarland and her fiancé Preston. Here they are.

Mary had sung a brilliant version of me and Bobby Magee and had received a standing ovation for her efforts. I invited her fiancé to come and present her with her medal and being a rather extra medium fellow like myself….instead of shaking hands……we did this.

Well, that is an old favorites of mine and is always assured of a laugh but Mary decided to present unexpected number three when she said into the microphone “you should see us when we have sex, we implode,” followed by Preston saying “I have to take a piece of chalk with me so I can mark where I started.”

Me………..I said nothing……..there was nothing to say………except “can I borrow the chalk?”

You see, that’s the unexpected. Yes, much of what I do is similar each and every week but why the recipe may be the same, there are new ingredients each and every cruise which is why I continue to enjoy what I do so very much. I know there are those who think audience participation is a cheap way of providing entertainment. I have heard it said before that we do this because we are too cheap to provide professional entertainers. Well, that’s bollocks. I am one of the last cruise directors who believe that there is a place still for this. That there isn’t anything funnier than ordinary people doing extraordinary things and just for a while…………becoming famous.

Take Romeo for instance.

Romeo is 78 years old. Originally from the Philippines he came to the United States when he was 8 years old and served for his newly adopted country in the United States Navy for 28 years.

Last night he was the hero in my Bedtime Story and 1,500 people applauded not only his hilarious antics but also his 28 years of service including both Korean and Vietnam wars. The standing ovation he received brought a tear to his eye and he could not stop saying “thank you.” And that is why I will keep doing audience participation until someone with a beard tells me to stop.

Oh and while I am on a bit of a rampage I want to mention yesterday’s posting about the 5% increase in our cruise ticket prices from March 22. While many thousands of you read the news and understood why I posted it a few stated that you thought I was an idiot. One lady suggested that I was a “pawn of the corporate world” and one interesting gentlemen mentioned he “would not read my fu**ing blog ever again” because of this.

Normally at this point I apologize and hand out lashings of fruit baskets………..but not this time. I make no apologies for taking one blog on one day to advise the many who read my daily musings to book before the prices rise……….and rise for the first time in many months. Oh and I was just advised that in the words of a Carnival executive “there has been a feeding frenzy” since we announced the news.

Carnival Cruise Lines has, I think, done a marvelous job keeping the prices were they were during the bleakest of times. In all other walks of life, disaster can be averted at the last minute.

“I smell gas so I won’t light this cigar.”

“Abdul the terrorist is shooting at me so I shall shoot back.”

“I am going to Paris tomorrow so I must by lots of air freshener.” And so on.

However, when you are running a cruise line you are not afforded this luxury.

Imagine Gerry Cahill sitting in his office (not in his underpants) saying “Oh, Bugger. A recession has arrived so I must immediately put my prices up and cut loads of stuff onboard.”

That didn’t happen……and I for one am proud to use this blog to tell the world about it.

Your friends
John, Heidi and Kye

Hi, I’m John, and this is my blog. So please don’t mistake my opinions — or those of my dear friends, fans or commenters — for those of Carnival Cruise Line or Carnival Corporation. My apologies in advance for anything I may say that upsets you, but this disclaimer covers Carnival and puts the blame directly on me………….. bugger.