It's In The Jeans

September 7, 2010 -

John Heald

Here we go again…

Sent: Monday, September 06, 2010 9:07 PM
Subject: Not allowed to dining room with Jeans on

Good evening,

Please be advised that guest from the cabin ____________, informed that she was not allowed to enter dining room on elegant night as she had jeans with holes. Ms____ explained that they were Versace jeans and cost $300. Ms __________ said that she felt embarrassed. Guest wants to speak to Cruise Director John. GSA advised that the Maitre D was doing what the rules told him to do. Guest is very upset and wants to you John says she cruised with you on Freedom in Europe.  Thank you

We had one of these last cruise didn’t we? And why she wants to talk to me I have no idea, just like I have no idea why anyone who hasn’t been dropped on their head at birth would pay $300 for a pair of jeans. And as for paying $300 for a pair of jeans with sodding holes in them….. well that’s only one step away from being locked in a padded room, dribbling on yourself.

I had a girlfriend pre-Heidi. A wonderful girl who was of sound mind and body. However, while we were together, she developed a serious jeans habit. Each week, a new pair. She’d get off the ship in Miami and bring them back onboard and show them to me, bubbling with excitement. I honestly couldn’t tell the difference between one pair and the next. All I cared about was when she was in them how long it would take me to get in there with her if you know what I mean.

I am sure someone else with a jeans fetish would’ve been excited by her purchases. But I didn’t understand. They were only jeans! Blue bloody trousers! But then again I hate shopping for clothes. I wear things until they fall apart. Right now, the soles of my shoes have worn so thin I can stand on a piece of newspaper and read it to you. And I’ve only got the one pair, which means when they finally disintegrate I’m going to have to shamble into Las Payless in P. V. and buy some more.

Anyway, maybe it’s because I have to get my jeans from Omar the Tent maker that I don’t understand the jeans junkies of the world.

I do understand that in Californian restaurants a pair of $300 Versachay jeans will get you the best table…… but here on the fun for all ships you might as well try to enter wearing only nipple tassels and a triangle of Laughing Cow cheese to cover your lady garden………because either way ……….you ain’t getting in.  As I have said before here, I have never fully understood what other people are wearing affects the enjoyment of the meal you are having but then again ……..that’s just me.

Time for today’s questions……………….let’s crack on.

Tracy Sanford Asked:
Dear John, (Please Reply)

Hmm, 45 years old and this is my first “Dear John” letter! Anyway, I wanted to tell you that I think you are an awesome voice for Carnival. You are so much of what I think of when I think of Carnival: fun, down-to-earth, and cheap. Oops.

Seriously though, I love that Carnival lets you be yourself.

My husband and I are devout “Carnival cheerleaders” and have introduced about 75 people Carnival cruising. (Every third or 4th year, we pay for our staff to cruise with us as a bonus and all of our family/friends now know that if they plan to vacation with us it will be on a Carnival cruise. ) We have never had anyone disappointed and each new cruiser gives us one more person to share our addiction with. 🙂

I have a platinum guest question. First I want to thank you for all of the fun perks. Being pampered is so much of the cruise experience, platinum just adds a cherry! I just wondered if they had ever considered giving something other than the frames. Something as simple as photo credits or a soda card, but something that doesn’t become clutter when it makes it home? Not a complaint, just a thought.

My husband and I are cruising on the Liberty for the first time on 9/11 and wondered if you would be able to get us a table for two? This is the first time in ages that it has just been the two of us and I thought it would make for more romantic dinners. Since Carnival won’t let you organize a pillow fight, we’ll be sure to have one in our cabin, just for you!

Thanks so much for all you do for all of us Carnival addicts!


John Says:
Hello Tracy Stanford

We are the same age Tracy and I am glad to welcome your first Dear John posting. Thanks for all the kind words and your loyalty to Carnival Cruise Lines and for introducing so many others to the fun for all vacations we offer. Yes, I have considered giving something other than picture frames in fact it is in something that if I was in charge would be one of the first things I would change. That’s not because the photo frames are not nice but because I have received so many comments about this both on the blog and in person onboard. They have been around a long time and so many of you have enough to open up a photo framing shop. Anyway, I am working on this and I will continue to ask the beards to help get this done as quickly as we can. Anyway, I will keep you informed and I will meanwhile ask the Maitre D to help you with your dining request.

Have a brilliant time on the Carnival Liberty.

Best wishes to you both

Stacey W Asked:
Dear John (***PLEASE REPLY***),

I’m writing to ask you about “Anytime Dining”, “Your Time Dining”, whatever the heck the name of it is, LOL.

My son is highly allergic to peanuts and we are wondering if that is conducive to the more flexible “Anytime Dining” option as compared to the designated seating times. I’m just nervous about the lack of consistency in wait staff and wondering how, even if he pre-orders the next night’s meal, how his meal will “find” him the following evening.

Is “Anytime Dining” designed to be able to work with us in a situation like this? I’d really love to try it, as late dining with two younger kids is out. And with early seating, by the time we get back on the ship from port and I supervise both kids getting showered and dressed, that literally leaves about ten minutes for me to get showered, dressed, make up, hair done, etc. to make it to dinner on time.

Thanks John!

John Says:
Hello Stacey.

Princess Cruise Lines call it Anytime Dining and we refer to it as Your Time Dining or YTD for short. Please don’t worry about your son’s allergy. Regardless of if or not you choose YTD or assigned seating we will make sure that he is looked after. The first thing we should do is have someone from our guest access services desk contact you and then the ship so that we have everything on record. The maitre d will then make sure that when you enter the dining room that your server will know of your son’s requirements and all will be well. So, please don’t worry, yes take YTD and lets us make all the arrangements for you. I have therefore asked one of the 344 Stephanies to forward this to the right people and someone will be in contact. If you need anything else please let me know.

Have a wonderful time

Best wishes

Chad A. Christiansen Asked:
Dear John,

My name is Chad and I am taking my girlfriend of 4 years on the Carnival Splendor Halloween night for a 7 night trip, just wondering if you will be on that ship? We are staying in room 2269, I know it’s the bottom of the boat, but we will have fun on our budget! Anyways I really enjoy reading your blog, really excited about the food we get to eat possibly lol… My lovely Lauren does not know that I am gonna purpose to her on the cruise, do you know a perfect spot???

John Says:
Hello Chad.A Christiansen

I will indeed be here and let me start by saying that I promise you will have a fantastic cruise. There are lots of spots that are romantic. Onboard we have deck 11 aft looking down on the wake of the ship at sunset…..that would be truly romantic. I can also say that the beaches of Cabo is another favourite place as is a special meal at the steakhouse during which you can ask her to spend the rest of her life with you. I can even arrange something on stage if you wish. So have a think about it. Is this really what you want, is she right for you. What about that girl at high school with the huge pair of…..kidding………I mean have a think about where and how you want to propose and then let me know if I can help further.

Best wishes and see you soon

Freddy Beach Asked:
Please Respond

Hi John –

Last sailed with you and Heidi (and your sister and brother-in-law) on the Carnival Freedom Grand Med in October 2007 (pre Thingy being born).

I started following your blog for that cruise and still enjoy it. I have missed a few blogs so you may have answered this already. Will you be the CD on the Carnival Magic for the October 7, 2011 med cruise?

We are booked in a spa balcony room for the Magic’s October 7 cruise. We are not normally spa people but wanted to try it out. How have the spa rooms and benefits gone over? We have not heard much about them and would appreciate your perspective.

John Says:
Hello Freddy Beach

Heidi and I have great memories of our time on the Carnival Freedom in the Med and I am sure you do to.  I will indeed be the CD on your Carnival Magic in October and it will be an honour (spelt correctly) to say welcome aboard to you once again. The spa staterooms have been a huge success on the Carnival Splendor and on your Carnival Dream and I am sure they will be as well on your Carnival Magic. The Elemis products in the stateroom as well as those earthy colours and luxury furnishings make the rooms very special indeed and of course your private access to a world of luxury and pampering will make this cruise extra special. During the next few months I will be writing much more about the ship and her features. I am very happy that you have booked and I hope that you will let me know if you need anything at all.

Best wishes

Michael Smith Asked:
John, (Please Reply seems to be the thing to say)

I organized a group on the Carnival Ecstasy for the Oct. 16th cruise and am thrilled that we have 78 cabins and 255 guests booked.

Of those 255 guests, 22 are my immediate family including my parents, brothers, sisters, spouses and their children. We are wanting to get a family photo taken on the ship and I know there are a lot of photo ops, but we were wanting to do something special. Can a photograph be arranged outdoors at sunset or something similar that would not involve a cheesy background? Wasn’t sure if the ships photo gallery could arrange this or not.

Any assistance would be appreciated.

John Says:
Hello Michael Smith

Many congratulations on this booking. How brilliant that you have booked 255 guests to cruise all together including so many friends and of course family. I have sent your photo request to the management onboard and they will be in touch with you as soon as you board the vessel. I am sure they will be able to sort out a brilliant family photo for you. I wish you all a brilliant cruise.

Best wishes

Mark W.Boyer Asked:
Hello John, (Please Respond)

I have been reading your blog (in my underwear) for a long time. It brings me a smile dreaming of being on a ship, especially the videos.

I read all the notes and saw all the pictures of My Carnival Dream and thought it was just that, a dream. The last time MY wife and I were on a ship it was on the Carnival Freedom with Wee Jimmy. We really enjoyed ourselves but with the economy and the prices of cruise these day thought it would be our last for a while.

Then Easter Sunday morning while at church I fell. I dislocated my right shoulder and tore my rotator cuff. I had surgery the end of April to repair the muscle. The recovery time has miserable. I had to wear a sling and was unable to move my right arm for 5 weeks and went to Physical therapy for 4 months. My wife was my angel. She did everything I asked and more. The worst part was I could not lie down to sleep. I had to sleep sitting straight up in a chair and she slept on the floor right next to me. FOR FIVE WEEKS!

I told her that I would take her away to reward her for all her kindness and attention. I started looking for something she would enjoy. Las Vegas, Atlantic city, Disney world, an all inclusive resort in the Caribbean, all too expensive for the value or unavailable. Then I started looking at cruises and came across My Carnival Dream sailing October 16, 2010. Price was great and the cabins we enjoy were available. We, I mean SHE can’t be more excited. She really deserves this special time. We already have Tuesday evening picked as the night we will go to the Chef’s Art Steakhouse for a special evening.

I do have request please. Is it possible to request a table for 2 in the main dining room? I want this trip to be about her and having a table for just 2 will help a lot. We are scheduled for main seating. If this is possible, please tell me who I need to contact. Thank you

Thank you Very much for your Blog. It is a great get-away even if only in my mind.

Mark and Donna Boyer

John Says:
Hello Mark W.Boyer

I am glad that there is someone reading my blogs in their underpants. I tried to set a new trend but so far it’s just me and you mate. I was sorry to hear about your fall and what an angel indeed your wife was during what must have been the most difficult of times. It would be an honour (spelt correctly) to ask the maitre d to assist you with your booking and I am sure they will be able to help. I hope this cruise on your Carnival Dream is both fun and relaxing and gives you the rejuvenation you need after all that has happened.

Have a brilliant time

Best wishes

Trueman Sanford Asked:
Hi John.

I hope I’m contacting you the right way since I’ve never blogged before, but, I just have to do this. Let me start by thanking you for entertaining my wife, and indirectly me, for all this time. She reads your blog faithfully. You have a real talent for this blog thingy. Heavens knows where you find the time.

She, along with many of your other bloggers, agrees that you go above and beyond with peoples special dining request etc. and that they should use guest services or the Maitre d’ for their requests. Herein lies my problem. On all of our cruises, because my wife is very shy, we try to get a table for two in the dining room. I must say that usually we are successful and the Maitre d’s go out of their way to find us a nice private table.

Just to be a bit devilish and to mortify her, I’ve told her that for our next cruise I’m going to write you with a special request. We are booked for a double Hawaii cruise on the Spirit on Sep 14 and Sep 26 of this year( less than a month away) and it would be a relief to know we have a private table for two all secured. Can you help me John? In return, if we are ever lucky enough to have you as our Cruise Director, I promise that I will bound up to you, kiss you on both cheeks, expressing loudly in French how great you are.

Thanks John, either way you really are great and, as I sit here in my boxer shorts writing this, once again I’d like to thank you for all of the entertainment you have given us.

Trueman and Linda Sanford
Cabin 5236, sep 14 and 26

John Says:
Hello Trueman Sanford

Welcome to the blog thingy and thanks for taking the time to both read it and post a comment. I was glad to read that your wife enjoys the blog and please tell her not to worry. Honestly, I have no problem helping people. It’s what I want to do and please never be shy to ask. I have sent your table for two requests to the maitre d on the Carnival Spirit and I know he will do all he can to assist you. Thanks for all the kind words and please if you have time, write and tell us all about your Hawaii adventure.

Best wishes to you both

Fun Dad Asked:
Hi John:

April 10th 2011 is my 70th birthday and I would like to spend it with my son Jeff the Fun Dude on his ship which I think might be the Dream. He will be on his vacation August 22nd. After he starts his new contract I want to book my cruise with his ship. My concern is that once I book far in advance to get a better rate and get locked in he could be transferred. How can I be assured that I can be with him if he is transferred? This happened in 2009 when he was transferred to the Glory to work in the comedy club, but the purser was able to transfer my booking. I don’t want to take the chance of missing his ship. Please send me an E-mail if you can.

Thank you
Fun Dad

John Says:
Hello Fun Dad

I checked with the office and there are no plans to transfer Jeff to another ship so please book away and surprise him. If there were any last minute problems I will look after them for you. You must be very proud of Jeff the Fun Dude and I hope father and son have a wonderful cruise together. Please let me know if you need anything else.

Best wishes

Daniel Grief Asked:
Help me avoid an embarrassing situation, please.

Hi Mr. Heald,

I am a single cruiser for many years now (Platinum). Of course my cruise line of choice is Carnival, having grown up in Miami Beach and seeing the beginnings of Carnival.

I am asking for assistance in avoiding an awkward situation.

Whenever I sail (being single), I am usually placed at a table for dining with people (couples usually) over 60 yrs of age. I don’t enjoy talking about senior illness, surgeries / operations or the ‘kvetching’ about the service, food or ship.

While I realize I am no youngster, I do prefer the company of those younger in age. You might consider this an attempt to recapture my youth but whatever it is, I like to think that younger folks keep me youthful.

So even though I usually see the maitre’d early on the day of departure, I am often told that the seating assignments are done, and they have no way to see where singles, in their 30′s -40′s sit??

Anyway, I find it awkward to go to my assigned table (late seating) and look around the table and have to decide if I would like to be moved after I see the folks at the table. It places me in an uncomfortable situation and have been approached on deck by one or two people from the original table asking me why I chose to be moved.

So, being single, at a table with older couples, isn’t my cup ‘a tea. I will have a cocktail before dinner bringing the glass with me to the table, and usually order a bottle of red wine for dinner and an after dinner drink with my espresso, and am always questioned about how much I drink!!! Geesh! I am on vacation!

If there is any way to set this up beforehand, I would be most grateful.

I sail September 25, 2010 on the Carnival Liberty (one of my favorite ships). September is my birthday month and always cruise during September to celebrate. My cabin is 2473 on Main.

Anyway, no complaints here… Carnival is my brand.

Thanks in advance.

John Says:
Hello Daniel

They do say that you are as only as young as you feel and you should never be embarrassed about wanting to enjoy the company of younger people. I am sure that your table mates will enjoy your company as well. So I will indeed ask the Maitre D to see what he can do and I am sure he will do his best to make sure you are at a table where fun will abound. By the way ……… what does “kvetching” mean?

Have a great cruise

Best wishes

David Asked:
John (please reply)

Although I understand that it is important to have adult areas so that the adult guests can have a place to get away and relax, I think it is not appropriate to take one of the pools away from the family crowd.

Although I can walk from the center lido pool to the aft lido deck to get the pannini and return I think that this area being setup as an adult only pool is not a good idea.

In your first blog of the week you clearly pointed out that there are 1000 children on the cruise for the week of Aug 8,210. That is close to 1/3 of the paying guests that you have just restricted from using the aft pool.

Would it be possible that the adult only portion of access to the pool be based on times of the day, so that the guests who should really count can also get the enjoyment that they are paying for?


John Says:
Hello David

The advantage of having the adult pool on this ship Davis is that we have not only the main pool and the slide and pool but also the children’s splash park as well. I realize as a family man myself that what you say is totally correct. However, we have been receiving so many comments that there was nowhere for the adults to relax on a hot sunny day. Since we implemented this those comments have all but gone away and I have to admit that the comments from families that thought that this was not a good thing have not materialized as I thought that they would.

Best Wishes,

That’s all for today. Now here’s Stephanie H. to remind you about something very important.

Hi bloggers. This is just a reminder…if you haven’t submitted your best coaster line to the RedFrog Coaster Contest, you have till midnight tonight to do so.

Here’s a link thingy:

Best of luck bloggers.
Stephanie H.

I hope you all had a wonderful Labor Day weekend and it feels like I have not written to you in ages. So, before I move onto this week, here is a recap of how last cruise finished. There is nothing more frustrating than sitting at an airport seeing the sign tell you the flight is delayed and that you will be enforced to sit on a chair that’s as comfortable as sitting on a cactus for a further 2 hours while deciding whether or not to spend $489 on a bottle of water. If you are lucky a 17 year old well try and tell you why the plane is delayed over the PA system. But you won’t understand because the kid has his mouth to close to the microphone and so all you hear is “wahahahawhawhawhahw.” Or if you are at Miami Airport all you will here is “wahahahawhawhawhahw grasiarse.”

But at least they try and tell you why you are still on the ground which strangely is one of the very, very few ways that the airline industry is a step ahead of the cruise industry.

Let me explain what I mean. On Sunday’s, debarkation usually starts at 8 am and is done by 10:30 am. I made a few changes when I arrived and I have to say it has been running very well. But not this last Sunday.  We were all ready to go. Sixty six cages of luggage were waiting to be placed ashore. This meant that approximately 1,800 guests had opted for the self assist option. However, US Customs and Border Patrol did not clear the ship and thus we could not start debarkation until 8:50 am. And when we did start the officers asked that we send people off slowly. We did as they requested and this meant that embarkation finished at 11:30am…….one hour later than usual. The effect to all this was that the ship had to clean the public spaces and cabins later than usual and by the time we were ready and by the time we got permission to start embarkation it was 12:45pm.

Now while the airlines try and tell you what’s happening and I can keep the guests informed onboard, but outside in the waiting areas of the terminal building there is no PA system. Now the embarkation staff does their best to get the message across but when you have 500 plus waiting and wondering……well that’s very difficult indeed. We desperately need a PA system here in Long Beach. I am pretty certain we have them in Miami and maybe other home ports but if there one place that could with a way to keep guests informed…’s Long Beach.

What else happened?  With the bad weather in Cabo, A guest started a petition thingy which stated Carnival should award the guests a 25% refund.  I have no idea how many signatures he obtained but after telling us that he intended to do this he never turned in the paper. This is because I think the vast majority of people told him to bugger off. Indeed, following a few grumpy shouters and screamers on Friday morning, the ship quickly settled down to a day in the sun and it is safe to say that having only recorded 21 written comments the rest the 3,611 remained both disappointed and yet understanding. I received lots of letters of support for the captain which I think he appreciated reading. It is a huge decision for one man to make. He knows he is affecting people’s vacation but he has to put the guest’s safety first.

Saturday morning was sunny up until 11 am or so when bizarrely we were engulfed in thick fog. The temperature plummeted and we closed the roof across the lido deck. Then, at noon time the fog dissapissatated (spelt correctly) and the sun came out again.

A 37 year old chap from Los Angeles put some money in one of the slot machines at 10:05 pm on Friday night and a few seconds later the lights were flashing and the bells were ringing because he had won a BMW. Yep………the ultimate driving machine as they call it. He then had a decision to make. Did he take one of three model BMW cars or $25,000 in prize money? The casino manager gave him that news then went back to his cabin and spent the rest of the night in the fetal position…….crying………singing Kumbaya………casino managers hate to lose. Well in the end our winner chose the BMW 328i Sedan with a retail value of over $34,000…….. what would you have taken? Here he is looking as you would expect…..a very happy chappy.

The bedtime story was a big hit this cruise and that’s what I took………………….a big hit.

Well that was the cruise that was and despite the missed port the guests were great and I really enjoyed entertaining them. Let’s see who is sailing with us this cruise.

GUEST COUNT                                             3478

NON US                                                          391 Canadians and 177 from Mexico

PAST GUESTS                                               1562

Under 2 Years 35
2-5 Years (Camp Carnival) 100
6-8 Years (Camp Carnival) 83
9-11 Years (Camp Carnival) 99
12-14 Years (Circle “C”) 69
15-17 Years (Club 02) 69
18-20 Years 106

As can see the count is down by 300 from last week and that’s because the kid count is down by some 300 as well. There is still quite a high number though and I guess some schools have yet to reopen their doors after the summer break. Well, one thing that was a huge success last week was the Punchliner comedy club. We had a few minor problems such as the first comedian being as funny as discovering that you have a hemorrhoid……on your chin……and the fact that we have to make sure that the bar staff acts a little more stealth like when crossing the front of the stage to serve drinks. Most of the comedians though were very good with the two at the end of the cruise Jeff Rolinger and Glenn Hirsch both doing a great job.

It is interesting that with the main show Vroom going on at the same time just how many people attended the comedy shows. We have a staff member at the door counting the heads…….here are the scores.

7:30pm                                    160

8:30pm                                    220

9:45pm                                    330

11:00pm                                  200

12:00am                                  300

We are going to look carefully at the times to see if we need to adjust anything but the most important fact is……..people laughed their bottoms off and that………….is exactly what Punchliner is supposed to do.

The weather so far this week has been picture perfect and the guests seem a lot of fun this week. I will be sharing some stories from the Welcome Aboard Show with you tomorrow.

As you know I have a new photo on the header of our blog thingy. Gone is the pouty cutey face replaced by a happier me. To be honest I didn’t think twice about it until I received this comment over the weekend.



Reply if you want

I saw that your photo on the top of your blog has been photo shopped and that your double chin has gone and that your teeth are very white. I cruised on a ship with you last year and I know you have a tooth at the front that is bent outwards and that your teeth most certainly are not white. I think it is crazy for you to think that we don’t notice this and as others have mentioned on cruise critic maybe this is another sign to stop the blog

Hello Calmcruiser

Do you know, until I read this comment I had not noticed but you are right. The 344 Stephanies have been most kind and made my teeth Hollywood white and straightened my front molar out. However, I am afraid to disappoint you but I will ignore any comments for me to stop writing the blog…… the same way the French ignore soap. When my viewing figures drop then I will know it’s time to hang up my underpants. Thanks for taking the time to write and I hope you had fun when you cruised.

Best wishes

Boy……..there have been quite a few “John you’re a bastard” type comments these past few weeks but that one is ……..well…… know. But as a blogger means that there problems with having your photo blasted a over the blog, Facebook, and in the August edition of Underpants World magazine. First of all I have face like a bag of wrenches. Then the next problem is I’m stuck with whatever expression my face happened to be pulling when the photo was taken. If I smile in the photo I will continue to smile for months until one of the 343 Stephanies changes the photo. From now on, every word I write on this blog thingy will be interpreted in the context of me with that Brad Pitt fake smile. So this means that when I write our yearly tribute to those who lost their lives on 9/11 it’ll look as though I have absolutely no compassion but of course I do.

The next problem is that you’re I am longer anonymous, so if I call Mike Tyson a big girl and that he smells of skunk piss and Mike Tyson reads it, and then two days later you bump into Mike Tyson at a Starbucks, there’s a good chance Mike Tyson will hit you, especially if, thanks to the photo at the top of the blog thingy……….he thinks I was smiling while said it. Since Mike Tyson has fists the size of refrigerators and a very bad, bad temper, this is bad news……or it would be, if he WAS a big girl and stank of skunk piss, which I’m certain he doesn’t…… although if Mr. Tyson is reading this I hear Al Gore believes otherwise.

Anyway, this all leads nicely into Sunday lunchtime on the lido. So there we sat, a happy and reunited family, Kye, Heidi and I. As it was embarkation day I was dressed casually and had no name tag on…….this of course is the only time I can do this because after the show that night my anominity is buggered. However, sitting there feeding Kye her banana and yogurt I could sense a group of guests looking at us.

As I have never been a CD on a ship out of California before I sat there feeding my daughter assuming that these people must be someone I’ve cruised with me before or a kindly stranger who’s about to warn me I’ve left my flies undone and that the mouth of the cave is open ……. giving me the chance to say “Yes, but the beast is asleep.”

Anyway, they kept smiling at me from the table next to us so me being me I said “Hi guys welcome aboard, have you cruised with me before or do you read the blog.” They all looked at me as though I was a bit weird…………..there was silence for a few moments until one said ………. oh, ummm…….we were just all saying how gorgeous your little girl is.”


They had no idea who I was and because I was embarrassed at being only moments away from asking for their cabin number I said a simple “Thank you”…………and sat down again.

So yep, it was my daughter they had been cooing over and not me. Guess Calmcruiser Ann was right………who wants to look at a bent toothed double chinned old bugger like me?

I promise that the next few weeks will not be full of fluffy anecdotes of what Kye and Heidi did. I say this because I know that some have voiced their opinions about this on the blog and on Cruise Critic and so I won’t bore you all with what Kye did next stories each and every day.

I will tell you know though that they landed safe and that as I write Kye is on Lido with Mum having breakfast and will later be having fun in the splash pool. This writer does not have the ability to properly express how overjoyed he is at being with his family again. I had been so scared that my daughter would not recognize me and that it would be some time before she felt comfortable around me again. Yet when I walked into the hotel room she saw me……and ran with her arms open wide and that was that……..a 45 year old man was instantly reduced to tears.

And on that note I will leave you with this photo and see you all tomorrow.

Your friend

Hi, I’m John, and this is my blog. So please don’t mistake my opinions — or those of my dear friends, fans or commenters — for those of Carnival Cruise Line or Carnival Corporation. My apologies in advance for anything I may say that upsets you, but this disclaimer covers Carnival and puts the blame directly on me………….. bugger.