DESTINY ARRIVES IN TRIESTE

February 25, 2013 -

John Heald

LOTS OF QUESTIONS AND A TV SHOW

February 20, 2013 -

John Heald

Today’s blog is all about questions so here we go.

 

Ruth Penlow asks:
Why does Carnival not offer only anytime dining and get rid of the early and late times then we wouldn’t have to wait for a table for TWENTY MINUTES as we did last week on the Carnival Dream? The boats should be anytime dining option only and I spoke to hundreds of passengers during the trip and everyone said they agreed. (more…)

HALF MOON CAY AND THE NEWS

February 19, 2013 -

John Heald

Many years ago when Heidi and I first met and when we thought about nothing but rumpy pumpy and traveling we flew to the other side of the world to have rumpy pumpy in a place that the brochure called a “paradise.” It wasn’t. It was one of those destinations where everyone — from the airport staff to the taxi driver — gave us a necklace of flowers so that by the time I arrived at the hotel I smelt like the perfume counter at Macy’s and was walking like the hunchback of sodding Notre Dame. (more…)

18 – 20 YEAR OLDS AND A DUEL OVER SOME PIANOS

February 8, 2013 -

John Heald

Just a quick blog today because I have loads on Facebook to catch up on and this weekend I have to drive to Liverpool to film this TV show thing for the beards at Carnival UK. Now many of you from North America drive for days to get somewhere and have no problem doing so. Britain is a small country and it takes around seven hours to drive the length of the country from Lands End in England to John O Groates in Scotland. The drive from my home in Essex to Liverpool will take around five hours and I shall have to use the GPS system or “Sat Nav” as we call it here. That’s because here in the UK we have something you don’t have in America……… corners. I wonder sometimes with immense roads like I-95, why American cars bother being fitted with steering wheels. (more…)

On Monday I wrote about how having a dog is a brilliant way not to get blamed for letting out a monstrous and eye-watering fart. Yep, blaming my dog Breeze for the Hazmat teams knocking on the door has been one of the best things about canine ownership. But revenge, as they say, is sweet and last night the four legged German bastard got his revenge. (more…)

THEY WERE READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL

February 5, 2013 -

John Heald

Across the fleet hundreds of guests enjoyed the spectacle that is the Super Bowl. Here are two reports from the Carnival Inspiration and first from Carnival Breeze as written by Cruise Director Butch Begovich. (more…)

RUSSIAN VISAS, STUNNING PALACES AND SAYING NO!

February 4, 2013 -

John Heald

This past weekend, I agreed to help a friend write his best man’s speech for the wedding of a someone we both know. I do not want to write his speech in any way, shape or form. I have not been invited to the wedding and I know I will get no credit for writing the speech. I do not have time to write this speech and I would rather deep fry my gentleman’s sausage and weld it on to the bow of the Norwegian Epic. (more…)

Hi, I’m John, and this is my blog. So please don’t mistake my opinions — or those of my dear friends, fans or commenters — for those of Carnival Cruise Line or Carnival Corporation. My apologies in advance for anything I may say that upsets you, but this disclaimer covers Carnival and puts the blame directly on me………….. bugger.