YOU HAVE TO LAUGH

May 28, 2015 -

John Heald

It is almost June which means we are only a couple of days away from Hurricane season. It’s hard to think about hurricane season when you are sitting in your underpants writing from the UK where hurricanes are as rare as finding a Jehovah’s Witness actually inside a house.  But at this time of year, it is on our minds and I hope will be as quiet as a mouse with laryngitis.  I thought, for the sake of new readers and new cruisers, to explain a few facts. (more…)

LET’S TALK ABOUT ME

May 26, 2015 -

John Heald

Yes, the blog is back.

After ignoring it for far too long, I have decided to put more time and effort into this and so I hereby pledge to you with my right hand on a photo of Megan Fox’s bottom, I shall sit here in my underpants and write as often as I can.

In my defence, the blog received the 20 million page views it has had because it documented my life as a cruise director and because I answered the questions posted there. So I hope that, as I do breathe new life into this page, you will continue to read and comment and although Facebook remains the main course, that a twice-weekly blog appetiser will be to your liking. OK, let’s crack on and talk about…………ummmm…………..me. (more…)

Changes to VIFP loyalty program

May 8, 2015 -

John Heald

Re-posting here for those without Facebook

(May 6, 2015 12:30AM) So here I am in Hawaii, it’s 6:30pm or 12:30am Miami time. I will try and stay up for a while but feel totally drained after two very very long flights. I will be back tomorrow with news and conversation but I wanted to share the news now of a change to our VIFP party.

As a part of our new VIFP loyalty program we have decided to make some changes to the party which let’s face it has become very challenging to service properly.

Now these challenges have come about for great reasons and that is the rapid increase of the number of Gold Card holders. Many of you have seen and indeed many of you have commented on how busy the party has been and in many cases we have had to hold two parties to accommodate the large numbers of invited guests. These numbers can, on some ships pass the 1500 mark which again makes the high standards of service you expect and the standard of service that we strive to provide quite challenging.

The party also loses that intimate feel that a party that is designed to celebrate your loyalty should have and so with these reasons in mind we will 5/15 departures change to inviting only Diamond and Platinum guests to the VIFP party.

Hold on…………..before Gold card holders start to burn effigies of me in my underpants let me tell you this.

To say thank you for your loyalty we will provide each Gold card holder with a drink coupon to the value of $9 which will be usable on the last sea day of the cruise from any bar on the ship on voyages of 5 days or more. This is along with the complimentary bottle of water we already provide. Hopefully you will appreciate and enjoy this amenity and meanwhile let me thank you for your loyalty and I hope soon you will be holding your bright and shiny platinum card and be on your way to diamond.

Now for my platinum and diamond friends, the VIFP party is being revamped ready for this change. Most of the time the count will allow us to hold the party in smaller lounges to the main theater and you can look forward to a more intimate party, details coming soon. The diamond guests will continue to receive their special event with the Captain and there are no other current changes to the VIFP program.

Thank you all for your time and your loyalty, long may that continue

Cheers
John

 

Hi, I’m John, and this is my blog. So please don’t mistake my opinions — or those of my dear friends, fans or commenters — for those of Carnival Cruise Line or Carnival Corporation. My apologies in advance for anything I may say that upsets you, but this disclaimer covers Carnival and puts the blame directly on me………….. bugger.